I used to spend a substantial amount of time obsessing over my breasts. I know we should try to uplift one another by undermining these ridiculous and mean body standards, but easier said than done, and at the end of the day, we really should be allowed to feel good in our skin. After years of feeling uncomfortable, never fitting into a bra, being emotionally incapable of going without a padded bra, and always (irrationally) worried that whoever I was talking to was thinking "holy crap, she's so flat she's concave!" I decided to take the leap into breast augmentation. I just wanted to 5 minutes without feeling upset about my boobs.
(Spoiler Alert: Mission Accomplished)
I'm a petite 5'4", fluctuate between 100-125 lbs, and was between a 30A and a 30B, which basically equated to less "meat" than the palm of my hand.
I used to abhor the idea of plastic surgery. I want to say this for the other ladies out there who are held back by this rhetoric. I used to worry it was "fake", but what about the two cups worth of padding I was wearing every day just to feel normal? I also used to worry because my mother had experienced a botched breast augmentation, including Capsular Contracture, when I was a preteen, and I had watched the expensive and painful fallout from that. (Ladies, this is why your choice of Dr is so important, and I can't recommend mine enough!)
**I chose Dr. Piyapas in Phuket, Thailand, I have 250cc (which is a 30DD on me but translates to a 34C/36B), silicone, round, high profile.**
This is where it's important to make these decisions with your DR. I thought I would need 300cc+ in order to get the size I was looking for, (I requested to "look like I do already in my padded bras, but not have to wear them anymore"), but I have a 30 band frame so the cc's will look different on every frame, just like cup size is so relative to body type. I also didn't want high profile because all the high profile pics I saw looked very "obvious" and, not to insult, like "Vegas girls". However, I had an infection in my breasts when I was developing that I'd always suspected stunted my breast growth, and that was confirmed when it was explained to me that I had a minor tissue abnormality. Basically, the tissue behaved like someone who had breastfed, so high profile would give the fullness and projection my breasts lacked. Choosing the round implant was also for this reason, though he also suggested tear drop, but discussed the potential risks of that. As for the size, my Dr suggested a 275cc to get to where I had voiced I was dreaming of, but when we tried on the inserts, I panicked. I thought they were huge (they weren't), and while I'm super happy with my breasts, and this difference would have barely been noticeable (25cc is nominal), I definitely suggest taking your Dr's suggestion on cc's.
As for my doctor, Dr. Piyapas wasn't just the right choice for the surgery but for the whole experience. I'm an awkward, introverted person to begin with, but no matter how confused, indecisive, or flustered I was during appointments, he never ran over the top of my concerns or questions, he took his time, and he made sure I was treated wonderfully. When I was having a panic attack before being put under, he held my hand and talked to me until I was out. That image is as burned into my head as the sweet staff, bright office, and homey hospital. A few years ago, I taught in Chiang Mai for a few months, and the Thai culture values service to others in a way we are not familiar with here in the states, but you can experience a sliver of that if you elect to do this surgery in Thailand. As for the standards of health, throw out any reservations you may have because there was a cleanliness and modernity accompanying Dr. Piyapas' practice that you can barely find in a US . (The hospital he uses, or at least did back in 2017, is Phuket Plastic Surgery Institute.)
Additionally, Dr. Piyapas' office uses a service called Renuval. They are amazing. You basically get assigned a case worker, and they help you with all the travel plans, visa paperwork, they have cars that will pick you up, drop you off, you can ask them anything. They stay in constant email contact with you for the months leading up to the surgery, and check in with you every month afterward. They really help answer any questions you have, and relay anything they can't answer to the doctor. For example, I was having nerve pain in my breasts a few weeks after surgery, and she was able to suggest techniques and vitamins, and then was able to get the doctor's recommendation on massaging and altering my medications a little. I also started freaking out when something sharp and plastic was poking out of my incision (it was my stitches, but I was panicking!), and she was able to calm me down and tell me as long as I wasn't tearing a scab, I could use tweezers to gently slide out the pieces that had decided not to dissolve. And that's just a peek into how helpful they've been.
It's been almost a year and a half since my operation. Wonderfully, I spend hardly any time at all thinking about my breasts other than that I love them. I wear whatever clothes I want, whether it's professional attire or sexy clothes, and I feel good about the way I fit in them now. They still won't smush together for cleavage, but it turns out that has way more to do with the shape and set of your boobs than the size. ** I know this isn't for everyone, but you deserve to love your body, and if that means a little help like this, I wish you the best sister!** If you have any questions, please ask!
Updated on 13 Apr 2020:
Someone asked about the incision scar, so here's a picture. The scar is under my breasts, and is only visible if you're looking up at me from that angle, or when breasts are pulled up. After 2.5 years, the scars are soft and light, with no pain, and they're not chunky or bumpy.
Updated on 13 Apr 2020:
Hey there! Figured there's been enough change to share. My breasts have gotten softer and fallen more into a relaxed position. (If that's not for you, just do pec exercises and they pop forward perky again, but I wanted them to be "subtle").
Miracle of miracles, they finally fall together now and I can get cleavage! I didn't think that would happen, especially when I was told if you didn't have cleavage before, you probably won't after because it has to do with distance and angle, and that's all natural.
That being said, I don't often wear things with cleavage. I've gotten so comfortable with my size and shape that I don't feel compelled to worry about how my breasts look. I often go without a bra, wearing a camisole or an under shirt if necessary, although a bra doesn't hurt on dates. ;) I also work in a serious field now, and am happy to report that going for a "reasonable size" was actually a really smart move for me long term, in case you're like me and were worried about being taken seriously.
Updated on 13 Apr 2020:
Someone asked about the incision scar, so here's a picture. The scar is under my breasts, and is only visible if you're looking up at me from that angle, or when breasts are pulled up. After 2.5 years, the scars are soft and light, with no pain, and they're not chunky or bumpy.