I had breast augmentation 30 years ago and they are rock hard and hurt like hell. Can I just get someone to make them go away?

I am sorry to hear about the complication you have experience; it sounds like you are dealing with aggressive encapsulation and will benefit from removal of the breast implants and capsulectomy surgery. Whether you choose to have breast re augmentation performed will be a personal decision.  In regards to selecting a plastic surgeon, I would suggest starting with the American Society of Plastic Surgery and/or the Aesthetic Society of Plastic Surgery to obtain a list of well experienced board-certified plastic surgeons.
Then, I would suggest you visit a few surgeons whose practices concentrate on aesthetic surgery. Ask to see lots of examples of their work and preferably speak/see patients who have had similar procedures done. Then, once you feel comfortable that your plastic surgeon has extensive experience helping patients achieve the types of outcomes you would be pleased with in a safe fashion, it will be important for you to communicate your goals carefully.  You may find the attached link, dedicated to revisionary breast surgery concerns, helpful to you as you learn more.  Best wishes.  

Hi Barb,I am sooo sorry you are having problems.It sounds like not only do you have capsules, but they may be calcified.  So yes, you can remove the implants, remove the scar capsule and calcium, and hopefully become pain free.  Or you may want new implants which would be softer.  Be sure to see only a board certified
plastic surgeon (by ABPS - The American Board of Plastic Surgery) who is a
member of ASAPS (The American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery) and or a
member of ASPS (The American Society of Plastic Surgeons). Also, ask if they have
an established, high volume breast augmentation practice, performing several
hundred breast augmentations each year. Ask to see their before and after
photos if you didn’t see any on their website. If they are experienced,
they should have several 100 breast implant patients for you to view. I
would also recommend that your doctor offer you the chance to talk to past
patients who would be happy to discuss their experience with you. You
need to feel comfortable, so make sure the environment is safe as in an
accredited surgery center. Also, ask a prospective surgeon if he or she has
ever published journal articles in professional peer-reviewed journals, which
they can provide you.All the best, “Dr. Joe”