Rhinoplasty finally booked and now I'm overwhelmed with guilt

Question

Ive wanted this forever and I've booked the surgery but I feel so guilty. I'm a stay at home mom by choice and my husband does very well for our family so it's not about money but I just feel so bad for wanting and needing this. My husband is okay with the cost and understands what I want to change but doesn't think I need to do it. Maybe it's because I'm not personally making the money? Or maybe I'm just nervous about the procedure? I know I want to do this so if not now, when?

Steven M. Denenberg, MD · Answer

Go here:
Facialsurgery.com/PPgconsult.html
... to read my essay on how to make sure you're not going to get in trouble with your selection of surgeon. Then, really, you just have to decide if the operation is worth it enough to press past your feelings of guilt. I don't say "guilt" usually, it's just that people are ambivalent about whether it's the right thing to do. But do re-confirm your selection of surgeon: I see so many people who don't take care in that part of the process and then regret having had the operation.

Michael M. Kim, MD · Answer

Hi Timetofixit,It is perfectly natural to have feelings such as yours prior to undergoing surgery. In my experience, the people who book rhinoplasty have been thinking about having it for a very long time and are happy that they went through with it. After surgery most patients respond with more self-confidence that positively affects aspects of their lives. You just have to make sure you find the right surgeon!Good luck to you.Michael M. Kim,  MD

Fred J. Bressler, MD, FACS · Answer

Your post highlights common, normal and understandable feelings and emotions associated with one's desire for nasal improvement. You apparently have wanted a rhinoplasty for a long time, so I assume you have taken a thoughtful approach to your goals and choice of an experienced trusted surgeon. Bravo! Your husband sounds terrific too. He's supportive and understanding of your personal wishes. Glad he thinks you're perfect as you are now. That's wonderful! It's ok to allow yourself this opportunity to have your rhinoplasty. You deserve to have the feeling of realizing the dream of an enhanced new nose. Sounds like you are ready.

William Portuese, MD · Answer

Rhinoplasty and guilt feelings are common with this type of procedure. The bottom line is if your nose really bothers you that much then proceed with the procedure. rhinoplasty is a difficult endeavor, so choose your surgeon very wisely  based upon extensive experience after  you have reviewed their rhinoplasty photo gallery

Dan Hatef, MD · Answer

Hey, good question.  I'm sure you're nervous because you're about to undergo surgery - that is a normal reaction.  I'm always concerned when patients act like they're coming in for their hair color.  Rhinoplasty is a significant commitment.  If you have been this concerned with the appearance for this long, you should definitely give strong consideration to following through.  Perhaps you should speak with your husband about your second thoughts.  Remember, you are doing this for you and not for him, and it sounds like he is very supportive!  Don't take his reluctance as a sign you shouldn't do it.  And ask to see your surgeon one last time so he can allay any fears you may have.  Good luck!

Rhinoplasty finally booked and now I'm overwhelmed with guilt

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