Beard Transplant. Best excuses when someone notices beard out of no where when I come back to work?

There will be some scabbing at the site of the transplanted follicles.  A story where you cut yourself shaving will make you look like a butcher.  "A rash" will send your coworkers running.  Depending on when you feel comfortable  returning to work and how thick your surrounding beard is are different factors for everyone. 

You asking a group of doctors how best to lie when you get to work?  Maybe you can post your question on the lawyers or politician question and answer page.

First, it's not like you're going to look like a member of duck dynasty all of a sudden. The transplanted hairs will actually shed after a month. Just keep it clipped short for a few months -- throw them off the scent. Then after about 6 months, let it go. It will be gradual enough that few will notice. Good luck!