Slap Your Way to Bigger Breasts

K. Mathews on 19 Sep 2011 at 12:35pm

I don’t want to call anybody a sucker, but did any of you women who paid for implants even TRY to slap your breasts around first? That’s one of Thailand’s approaches, anyway, where Khemmikka Na Songkhla promises to smack patients’ bosoms at least a couple of inches larger.

Khemmikka says she learned this traditional secret from her grandmother, who told her that rubbing her breasts roughly would make her bustier. The general idea is to massage and slap the fat from nearby areas of the body into the chest. Seeing her breast size increase by 4 inches after this treatment, Khemmikka decided to offer it at her own beauty parlor to woman looking for natural breast augmentation.

Before you try to argue that this method is some sort of scam, you should know that the Thai government has sanctioned breast slapping. In fact, they’ve already paid for dozens of Thai women to undergo Khemmikka’s treatment in order to help boost their confidence (though I’m sure boosting their bra size factored into their decision, too).

When one of Khemmikka’s patients accused the slapping treatment of giving her breast cancer, the government conducted a study on the method, ultimately finding that aggressive breast massage does not cause cancer and actually does enlarge boobs. But no, you can’t see the results of the study you pervert skeptic.

Though Khemmikka considers breast slapping a family secret, she has agreed to teach 10 students the practice for a tuition of nearly $300,000. Sure, that’s more than an Ivy-league degree, but would you rather become a lawyer or businessperson, or smack around breasts all day? Think of it as an investment for the future.

In addition to slapping breasts, Khemmikka also offers face and butt slapping. Now you can look like you got in a fight beautiful all over!

Check out the technique in action: 

Would you be willing to try this technique for larger breasts?  Do you think it would work?