Butterflies!

I went to the natural health store today to buy cream/gel and pills for the post op swelling and bruising. I found Arnica Montana and Traumeel but I was stuck on which one to buy. When I asked the manager which is the most effective and what's the difference between the two she recommended the Traumeel. Interesting fact: The Traumeel already HAS Arnica in it plus a bunch of other herbal ingredients to help. So I bought Arnica Montana pills (to take 2-3 days before surgery) and the Traumeel gel. I also asked what's more effective - gel or cream/ointment? She told me the gel simply has alcohol in it and I should get the cream if I want a thicker layer... I got the gel because I usually have an oily nose... :)

7 DAYS TO GO!

A week from today I'll probably be home trying to sleep after my surgery in the morning! Honestly the closer I get to the big day the more I second guess my decision. I don't know why...? Is it because of what my close friends will think of me? Yeah, it sucks that some of them are disappointed at my decision. But should I let that disappointment stop me from making my wish come true? No. Am I doubting my need for surgery? Yes, but all I have to do is look at pictures to remind myself of why I want to do it. It's a lot of mixed emotions... On one side I'm excited, nervous, happy and I cannot stop talking about it with my friends. But on the other side I'm indecisive, doubtful of the need or outcome of surgery, scared... I need a good distraction!

I've pretty much bought everything - cutips, polysporine, saline spray, medications, couch pillow thing, extra pillows, a hat, sunscreen, water bottle with built in straw, arnica pills and traumeel gel, gentle facial cleanser... All I need to buy now is soft foods!! I also have to clean my room. There's no way I can recover smoothly with a very dirty room, haha!

I'm so excited! Techically it's pretty much 6 days from now since today is almost tomorrow :D

6 SLEEPS!!! It's so close yet feels so far away!!!

Wow, time is going by so fast! At the one mark until surgery mark the first 3 weeks go by the slowest, but the last week goes by at lightning speed. I spent the last few days deep cleaning my room and doing ALL of my laundry. A big thanks to my boyfriend for the organization and furniture rearranging, my room is now recovery friendly! I don't have to worry about dirty clothes, dusty shelves, or hairy floors (I have a german shepherd who sheds like crazy)... Everything is in it's right place now and I did all of my food shopping today too, so I'm set to go for tomorrow.

ONE MORE SLEEP until my surgery!!

My surgery's scheduled for 12pm, so pretty much I have 23hours to go.

I am beyond excited! Crazy butterflies in my stomach... I am having a wonderful day today and my attitude towards the surgery is back to positive! To be honest with whoever's reading my journal, I had a bad day yesterday just stressing myself out about what people would think of me after having this surgery done. Am I a disappointment to my friends now? Will they look at me differently... will they think I'm too superficial? Will my boyfriend love me less because I'm not "natural" anymore? I've never had any anxiety issues, I'm usually a calm and laid back relaxed person, but I think yesterday was my first day of experiencing anxiety. The muscle above my left knee was mad twitching, I kept getting headaches, I would get this weird aching pain in the middle right part of my back. I'm a big believer in the power of stress and how it can F* you up from the inside out, so I'm 100% positive all of my "symptoms" yesterday was due to stress.

Anyway, I think it's normal for people to worry about people's judgements. So if you're going through that today, all I have to say is "let go of the FEAR" people. Every emotion or feeling that you ever experience in life comes from 2 states of being: Love or Fear. These two states are really the root of all emotions. As soon as I let go of any fears as to what people think (our family and friends should love us for who we are, not what we do) my mind finally started to relax, and then my body followed suit. I became myself again and f-ing excited for the surgery! Ultimately it's my choice and I'll be damned if I let the fear of other people's opinions control what I do in my life :D

One more day, one more day, one more day!!

Pics will be posted soon :)))

SO EXCITED!!

Put some pics up... obviously I have my good and bad angles but that's the jist of what it looks like. Everything is set for tomorrow. My wonderful boyfriend brought over his super cool monitor for me to watch movies in my room. My mom bought me my favourite candy (SOUR KEYS) as my "last supper" or food type thing before the big day. I bought everything I needed, including munchies and junk food for my friends who are visiting me hehehe. I even bought "50 Shades of Grey" to read when I get bored... I heard it's really good ;). I think I'm going to download grey's anatomy, I completely missed the last season... and Game of Thrones? Hmm... :D

Today's the day!

So apparently my arrival time is at noon, which must mean my surgery is at 1pm. Everything is set and ready, just need to do my bed. I talked to my dad right before (he's away on a biz trip so unfortunately he couldn't be here), so nice to talk to him. He says not to worry and I'll be fine. I'm really lucky that my family and friends are very supportive and excited for me so I really had no problems with telling people.

Ok, gotta head over to the hospital soon! Will keep you guys updated :)))

Hello everyone! I'm alive and well, tight and swollen as we speak :). My surgery went well and so is the recovery process so far. I kind of had an annoying day though because I had to wait such a long time. I had my IVs done at 130pm I believe but they didn't call me into the op room until about 330pm. The nurse said that somebody had complications in the recover room, so that backed everything up, and some patients had to recover in the op room until that issue got dealt with... The wait was the hardest part because they wouldn't tell me anything at first but it was okay - I distracted myself by watching the EuroCup game between the Netherlands and Germany! Danke danke big tv in room!

The IV part was the coolest part of it all - They put this plastic "needle" thing in my vein and when the fluids were released I felt the coolest cold sensation flowing through my vein then up my arm. It felt AWESOME haha, honestly, so for the people who are worried about that part, it's nothing to worry about :). Bonus: I wasn't hungry or thirsty anymore. (I chose general anaesthesia and you're not allowed to eat or drink fluids after midnight).

I honestly don't remember when I fell asleep in the op room. The last night I remember is the nurse saying she was going to put an oxygen mask on me and it's going to smell like rubber, and to take deep breaths. After the first deep breath I was gone! Next thing I knew I had a yellow towel over my eye and the nurse was asking me how I was doing. I chatted with her for a bit... I had no idea what I was saying that was making her laugh so much! I always wondered why the reviews on surgery day are usually short and sweet. Now I know it's because they're really isn't much to say haha. I was very loopy even though I felt fine, but I can't remember much. When I was leaving I decided to go to the wash room and when I came out I sort of lost my balance. The nurse and my mom were laughing so hard because I was still "drunk" they said. In my head I just tilted to the right for 2 seconds but apparently the reality was I was falling over sideways haha. I believe them because when they were wheel chairing me out on a very slight downhill I was putting my hands up as if I was on a rollercoaster, hahahaha.

Anyway, when I went home I didn't feel like I needed the sleep right away so I chilled with my mom upstairs. My boyfriend came over and we all chatted for a bit. I definitely don't remember all of the night. I just remember wanting to laugh my ass off at anything and nothing (I'm still giggling randomly as we speak) and while laughing I would start to cry. I was stressing out because I couldn't control it and it was painful... it definitely wasn't helping with the swelling and bruising in my face.

Anyway, I eventually went to bed and I had such a good sleep. They didn't pack my nose (I overheard the nurses say I wasn't bleeding that much during surgery) so I can definitely comfortably breath out of my nose. I would say that my sense of smell is already SO much better than before. My nose kinda deviates to the left and because of that I can't breathe as well in the left nostril. He said he'd try his best to fix that. So really I had a rhinoplasty/septoplasty I guess, but I originally just went in to change the aesthetics of my nose. I really had no problems breathing out of the left nostril unless I was exercising/running or when I'd have a cold, in which case the nostril would be pretty much blocked.

All in all, the day of surgery was a breeze in my memory but if I wasn't so "drunk" and loopy I would stay that I was probably was very uncomfortable (not in pain). The only "pain" I felt was the pressure on my nose. The pain medication fixed that. I had to change my gauzes twice yesterday, and once this morning when I woke up.


Post OP DAY 1-

So the bruising spread out under my eye and my nostrils are uneven. I'm totally cool with that since I expected this to happen after reading a lot of the reviews on here (thank goodness for realself.com!). I get thirty so I'm drinking lots of water. My nose was a bit sore yesterday from the tube but it completely feels normal now. I remember waking up last night tasting some blood but I repositioned myself to not have my head titled back so much - so that the blood leaks through my nose into the gauze pad instead of the back of my throat. The tip where he did the cut was hurting and the pressure on my bridge due to the cast is uncomfortable but the pain medication helped with all that. I'm actually feeling a little tired again so I'll be taking a nap very soon. For the swelling I've been taking anirca montana pills and rubbing traumeel gel around my eyes and cheeks with a qtip. I've also been good about cleaning the inside of my nose with that alcohol peroxide stuff and q-tips and then gently putting polysporin ointment (not cream) in it. I don't have an appetite at all but I do eat all natural organic soy pudding right before I take my antibiotics and pain meds. :)

Pics to come very soon!

Day 1 Post Op (Cont'd)

I realized I made a few spelling mistakes up top (I blame the medications). I also wrote that I had a sore nose due to the tube... I meant sore throat :)

Quick update: I can't breathe out of my nose anymore - it's almost completely stuffed up. My doctor called me today to see how I'm doing (how wonderful because I had a few questions). I have some blood under my cast and he says that's normal because he narrowed my nose so there are some stitches outside. Other than that I'm good. Still bleeding, still cleaning, still medicating. I'm trying my best to avoid the discomfort... I swallow a pain killer every 6 hours. I'm still not eating much. Oh and about 2 hours ago my top and bottom lips started becoming numb (which I was warned about in advance) but I've got the feeling back again. My bruising and swelling have been doing weird things throughout the day - totally not worried about it.

So Overall Day 1 has been good! No complaints. :))) So far ;)

Day 2 Post Op (feels like week 2, lol)

Time is going by slowly. I've woken up both nights at 5am very thirsty and tired. I drink water then go back to sleep. Then I wake up at 8am thirsty again but not able to go back to sleep. So I get up, have some water, clean my nose, have some pudding, take my meds and then veg out on the couch. This morning was hard to get out of bed. I had a throbbing headache and I wasn't too impressed with my swollen face. That brought my mood down a little. I just have to keep reminding myself that it's only day 2...even though it feels like day 12 haha.. and that I'm healing at a normal pace. I'm not superwoman after ;)

Only the inside of my left nostril is bleeding. The outside of my right nostril is bleeding a bit too (where the stitches are from narrowing my nose) and the blood's under the cast. I can't clean that part... My upper lip is super swollen. I feel like Voldemort lol. I still have swelling under my eyes but it's not black anymore. It's mostly red and yellow. The feeling of pressure on my nose is still annoying. The worst part is the dry tongue. Make sure you guys always have a full bottles of water near you :)

I have this crazy sense of smell right now it's amazing. I can breathe a little bit out of my nose but not completely and even with the gauze over it I can smell the cantaloupes and salsa in my house. And before the surgery I used to love yoghurt with honey mixed in it even though I hate the taste of honey... The taste wasn't that strong enough in it, it just made the yoghurt sweeter to me. Anyway, I tried having some today but the taste of the honey was too strong for me to enjoy.

So that's it for day 2 :). I'm pretty sure day 3 is always the toughest so I'm going to mentally prepare myself for that. I'm staying positive and optimistic... and patient :D

Oh yes... I wanted to thank you guys for your support and nice comments and review updates. Checking this site is always the highlight of my day :). It's so much easier to get through this surgery with people who understand... Grateful. :)

Day 3 Post Op

Hey everyone!

So this morning I woke up at 5am with a terrible pounding/throbbing pain in my head. I took a pain med and tried to go back to sleep, but I couldn't because I was feeling very off. I still had some pain and in general I was feeling fuzzy/not right. I thought that maybe it's because I didn't eat anything with the pill like I usually do so I decided to have some pudding. I also took my nausea medicine too. I actually felt worse after that and ended up throwing up in my bathroom. Thank goodness because ever since then I've been feeling normal and like myself again! No more of that fuzzy or disoriented feeling and pounding/throbbing pain in my head. I got a minor headache at noon but I took a Tylenol extra strength and that's been lasting the whole day...

So pain wise I'm doing great for day 3. Swelling-wise, not so great. It's going down my face now and the space between my upper lip and nose is huge!! I look like a fish or snake, hahaha. There isn't much I can do about that. I'm still taking the arnica pills and traumeel gel. I'm not sure if that's been helping or not at this point. I've been icing my face too... I'm not worried about it. I know that day 3 is the worst for swelling and bruises. :)

My nose stopped bleeding - I'm really happy about that. And I can breathe out of both noses today. I'm really glad day 3 is almost done! Only 3.5 more days until my cast removal! Wohooooooo

Day 4 Post Op

Ok people! Here we go!

So by the end of day 4 I can tell you that the bruises under my eyes are healing well... slowly but surely. I see a difference between this morning and now. I still have black marks under them but no swelling. Apparently I'm the football player of the group now and I don't mean European football...peaking of which, GO Portugal, aka Christiano Ronaldo!! Ahem, anyway... The swelling keeps going down my face. I don't have the between the lip and nose fish swell thing going on. I do have chipmunk cheeks though :) a little painful to the touch. I massage the swelling and the bruises, rub the traumeel gel on them and of course I still religiously take the arnica pills.

The only pain I feel is from chewing still (gums, not so much sensitive teeth today). I have this weird bruise on the inside of my upper lip. I can't open my mouth wide either. I also feel the sting of my stitches when I'm trying not to laugh, yawning or accidentally flaring my nostrils. Be careful with that ladies and gents :) Laughing and yawning are you enemies during recovery!

I think that's the worst part of it all... My mom and boyfriend are the two people that make me laugh the hardest in this world.. I've had to squeeze my cheeks to together so my nose doesn't get affected, haha.

Kay that's all I have to report! Happy Father's Day, everybody! Wish my dad was here.. give your dads an extra hug for me today! Can't wait til Thursday...

Day 5 Post Op

No sleep last night until 6am. Woke up at 10am. It's getting very very hard to sleep upright comfortably. My back feels sore... Never was a back sleeper. Bad start to the day but I turned it around! I made myself a big delicious breakfast this morning to get my energy/mood and system going, since I haven't gone since the surgery (did the trick and got my energy for the day). I'm also distracting myself with a great book :). 50 shades of grey? More like 50 shades of blush!! :D

The bruises are still there, some parts of it are noticeably yellow now. I still look like a football player though :). Swelling in my face is going down still going down. I'm starting to feel dirty - hair face body - as I still haven't taken a shower. Ohhhh well at least I'm saving on water :). lool... Definitely going to do a body wash tomorrow.

So day started off bad, but ended up good! Not much else to report...

Only tues, wed left... Then it's cast off on Thursday!!

Wow... Day 6 Post Op

Hello :)

So I haven't had much sleep last night either... Woke up early again. I made another big breakfast to keep my system going. Then I have a light lunch that most people would call a snack... And then I'm done for the day! 5 hours later and I'm still full...

The bruises gradually keep disappearing - I have thin delicate skin under my eyes so I'm not surprised I bruised there and that it's taking a while to go away. I just keep massaging it hoping that helps. I can't notice any swelling in my face any more. I can even see the lines in between my eyebrows when I frown now!

Inside my nose is looking good... No bleeding whatsoever. Some stuffiness now and then... I feel pressure on my nose sometimes too. I even got a few headaches today, which didn't go away even after I took a tylenol extra strength. It's okay though. I can definitely handle the pain :)

Only 2 sleeps away from Thursday!! I am incredibly excited!!! Thursday means freedom! Freedom from the cast. Freedom to take a SHOWER!! Freedom to rejoin the outside world again! Freedom to sleep on my side!! I WILL FINALLY GET A CLEAN GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP!! I cannot tell you how giddy I am at this thought..... I cannot wait.... can't wait!!

Day 6 Post Op

Just one more day until the new nose reveal... I get to see what I've been dreaming of for years... I still sometimes can't believe I actually went through with it and it's all a done deal. I'm very happy though.

I just realized how long my review is on my surgery (yikes). I didn't mean to go into so much detail. I tend to go overboard sometimes :), especially when I'm really excited about something.

Last night I was pretty tired from only getting small amounts of sleep lately, so last night I passed out quickly. This surgery has been physically, mentally, and emotionally taxing... A few people have been commenting/messaging me on my positive attitude and although it's easy for me to be patient and positive, it does take some energy! Especially when I'm having a bad day and I'm feeling low about it... It takes a lot of energy to turn it around for myself. So it's day 6 and I'm tired, excited, restless, patient, RELIEVED, good-sleep-on-my-side-and-stomach deprived. Like I said I passed out quickly but unfortunately, there was this one spot under my cast that was dying to be itched. The feeling was so persistent and strong that it woke me up from my deep sleep.

When I finally got back to sleep I woke up soon after because of an annoying owl constantly going hoooot hoot outside my window (and this is at 8am... aren't owls suppose to be asleep in the daytime?). I eventually gave up and got out of bed.

Back is sore, inside the nose where the stitches are kind of sting now and then (I still get a tiny bit of blood when I clean them). I ran out of arnica pills and I have one more antibiotic to go! I can't wait to get this cast off... the dried blood underneath it is finally starting to gross me out. I need a hot shower badly. I've been using baby wipes to keep my face/neck/underarms/body clean. It was sunny today so I went outside to walk my dog a bit. Fresh breezy air in warm weather feels amazing...

I noticed today lost a bit of weight since last week. I really have no appetite at all and I'm always feeling full even if I eat or not, so I'm eating less than my body's used to. And because of my very dry mouth this week I've been drinking tons of water. I know it's not the best way to lose weight but it's nice to see a smaller tummy lol

Anyway, I'll keep it as short as I can. All is good today! Absolutely no complaints. No pain. No discomfort. No pressure. Can't wait to get my cast off tomorrow. Of course I'll be putting pictures up :)

Done and Done!

Loving my results... I look different but in a good way. The only only thing I'm not liking is the tip. It's very UP and pig-like. My doctor assured me that it's going to come down soon. When I touch the tip it's hard, so I know it's very swollen. In fact, the whole thing's swollen. It's going to become thinner and smaller gradually in time :). My PS is extremely happy with how it turned out and how I'm healing :) (so am I). He says I don't need to tape my nose, that I'm good to go (wohoo!) and the stitches will dissolve on their own soon.I still have my bruises... I'm hoping that goes away by the time I start work next week! I'm not worried about that though.

I'm going to go shopping for some more arnica pills... can't wait for the tip to go down. Loving it already anyway. WORTH IT!

2 Days after Cast Removal -

I'm exhausted. On Friday I did a bunch of grocery shopping for ingredients of the pasta salad I was making for my work BBQ today. I was wiped out from the shopping. I came home and made it. Today I went to the bbq... Even though I had a good sleep last night, I got tired really quickly and had to leave the bbq early. I guess I forgot that technically I'm still in recovery mode :(

Yesterday I was really worried about my tip coming down. I kept putting traumeel gel on my nose hoping to bring down the swelling faster. I'm also still taking the arnica pills. I love my nose and I think it looks fantastic!! But I did not want a tip that high up... I was worried it'd be a permanent thing even though I know better! I know that I have to be patient and let time do its thing...

When I woke up today though I noticed THAT THE TIP CAME DOWN!! Even my dad noticed :). I think it'll come down so more and the whole thing will be smaller and narrower... even if it doesnt, I can definitely live with this!!! I am so inlove with it... I absolutely love it....I'm so happy I chose Dr. Buonassisi!!

The feedback from my coworkers - it looks very cute and natural... The coworkers I don't get to see everyday said they would not have known I had surgery if I hadn't told them. My corker who works with me everyday said at first I looked different the first time he saw me (I visited them on Thursday) but now that he sees me today it's as if I've always had it. :)))) Wohoooo

So I put up pictures I took today - Can you guys see a difference? I'm not sure if you can... But me and my family definitely noticed. And my bruises are almost gone (covered by makeup a bit too)

Hello! I'm sorry I haven't been updating you guys. I started work on Monday and I get exhausted by the time I come home. I work spilt shifts so on my break I go home to nap for a few hours, go back to work, come home to devour a few servings of dinner, then I pass out. That's been my routine so far :). On the weekend I had bbqs to go... the shopping and food prep killed me Fri Sat Sun.

He's a tip to people recovering... Just because you have the cast off doesn't mean you have recovered! You can go back to work, but ease into your normal routine. I personally get exhausted very quickly. It makes sense... you go through a surgery, you lose a lot of blood, your body's working overtime to heal from the incisions and swelling, you've been stuck at home doing nothing for a whole week, you haven't been eating like normal... I definitely overdid it. Work wise I think you'll be fine if you have an office job. My job is physically and mentally demanding (I work with kids) so I get drained so easily. Thankfully I have very understanding and supportive coworkers who pick up and carry everything for me (love them!).

I've really been enjoying my new nose! Nobody's noticed I had surgery done... The kids haven't, their parents comment I look different but they ask if I dyed my hair or lost weight (yes on the weight loss). I don't say anything unless they ask. The people who knew I was doing it are super supportive and excited to see my results. Those who have think it looks fantastic..

Can I just take a moment to thank you guys... each and everyone who've followed me and wrote all the wonderful comments about my results??? Wow....thank you!!! It's a bit of a weird feeling to get such positive comments about my nose and looks, totally not used to it...

:) Still using traumeel gel, still taking arnica montana pills, no pain meds at all, my bruises are aaalmost gone! I take a cutip, put traumeel gel on it and then rub it on my bruises in a circular motion. It really sped up the healing. I can see a difference right away when I massage it for a good minute. I put the gel on my nose too with a cutip (it's much more gentle than my finger). It's not much of a summer here in my city yet but I still put SPF 60 sunscreen on it. I use saline spray 2x a day. I put polysporin x2 inside and outside. My outside stitches are almost all dissolved. The insides are taking longer to heal. The only pain I feel is where it's still swollen.

Tip for when you're washing your face - be very gentle! Even when I rub my cheeks, if I rub too hard (which isn't hard at all) I feel pain in my nose because it's pulling at my skin. Oh and I also feel pain when I do too much (stand, squat - I still can't bend down - talk, laugh). It's not pain actually, it's more like a tingling feeling under my skin and that's when I know my nose is swelling up. It's funny cause I can see a difference in the tip and left side... by the end of the day it's noticeably bigger. And another funny thing - my right side barely has any swelling or pain (you'll see in the front view picture). It's only the left side and tip.

Ok guys, that's it for now! Hope you're all doing well :))

Almost 2 weeks after my cast removal:

It feels like I've had this new nose for months now, yet time's flown so fast it feels like I got my cast off just yesterday... Does that make any sense? I can't believe how weird time is...

I haven't updated in a while, partly because I've been so busy and tired (energy level was still at a low but finally back to normal this week) and partly because I was trying to stay away from this site. I love this site and it's wonderful connecting with other people and reading their journeys/tips, but I was getting really worried about my nose... So I took a step back to try not have my surgery be the center of my thoughts 24/7.

I was religiously putting on traumeel gel 2-3x a day and I stopped a few days ago because again I felt like I was making too much of a fuss over my nose and it seemed like the swelling was getting worse and worse. I should be patient and let my nose heal naturally I decided. Plus I was getting weird brown spots... which disappeared after a long steamy shower. Ever since I quit the gel my nose has been getting smaller - my bf and family all noticed. I was getting annoyed my tip was getting wider and bigger, but now I'm relieved to know it's smaller. The left side's swelling is coming down nicely too - much less curved. Also, my tip came down nicely. I still have some ways to go... The progress is getting better though! I feel better now :)

One thing I really love about my surgery is that my upper lip looks bigger. I never would consider getting lip augmentation/botox/whatever but I of course daydreamed of plumper lips. They definitely look plump now! Maybe it's the weight or my facial features stand out more now that my nose is smaller.. I don't know? But loving it!

I'll put up pics tomorrow... Way too tired now :). Still taking arnica montana pills, still polysporing it 2x a day, still saline spraying it 2x a day. My left nostril's stitches (inside of course) are finally dissolving. Right side stitches are dissolved but I think there's still some healing to go there. It seems like it's taking a long time for them to heal. Is everyone else finding that their stitches take this long to heal? Outside stitches at the bottom of my nose healed a bit ago, but now I have this darker line... I'm hoping that fades overtime because I think I look like Frankenstein hahaha.

Anyway... goodnight everybody! pics to come tomorrow. Need sleep...