POSTED UNDER Mommy Makeover REVIEWS
Mommy Makeover 31 Yr Old, 5'1", 103 Lbs, 3 Kids. Breast Implants and Tummy Tuck - Midvale, UT
ORIGINAL POST
As a 31 yr old mother of three (7, 4, and 2 yr...
83ferferFebruary 5, 2015
WORTH IT$12,000
As a 31 yr old mother of three (7, 4, and 2 yr old), I have given up my body and mind to my family. They are my world. However, being past the stage of "growing humans", it's time to TAKE MY BODY BACK! I am excited and terrified. I have come to learn that anxiety and excitement are two closely related emotions. I joined Realself recently to further educate myself in the process of this big decision. I cant decide if it is helpful or worse in calming the nerves. I am 5'1", 103 lbs, 34 A cup. I have lost all my fat and saggy skin is left behind. My abdominal separation is moderate and you cant tell with clothes on but the skin is bad. I would love to get into that bikini again. The recovery from the tt sounds horrible but only time will tell. As for the implants I am leaning towards a natural look. I have never had boobs (other than nursing) so this is new territory for me. I know very little here and there are so many different kind of boobs out there now I dont even know what "natural" is anymore. Surgery is scheduled for March 9, 2015. Join me on my journey through this emotional and physical rollercoaster. All aboard!!
83ferfer's provider
UPDATED FROM 83ferfer
26 days pre
A little freaked out!
83ferferFebruary 11, 2015
I have been obsessively researching pros cons, pre and post operative preparations, what to expect, what to discuss with your PS, complications that can occur, success stories, failure stories, ...and I am officially freaked out. Everyday it seems to change; I think, "hey, I got this!", then it quickly goes to, "what if I am the one that dies on the table? My husband will have to lie about my death to EVERYONE because I refuse to be remembered that way." Crazy you say? Why yes, I would agree with you. I experienced anxiety and worry about this decision for about a week, then I went out and bought a few preparation supplies (ie. front zip MuMu, front closure bras, made a few rice sizers,--had some fun there--, vitamins, extra pillows). And now, I am feeling much better. There is something to be said for a little "retail therapy"; am I right, Girls?! The anxiety has ebbed and I am getting my lists and preparations together. I am ecstatic about my BA. No worries what so ever! I can't wait to feel how the other half feels. However, My main concern is the TT. I am pretty thin to begin with. i was told very little, if any lipo would be needed for the TT. I find myself contemplating "the TRADE". Do I trade one set of scars for another? My complaint with my tummy is the sagging skin, stretch marks and deformed belly button. Is it worth it? Do I really need it? I would LOVE to be in that bikini again, but how bad do I want it? I still have time to chicken out I guess. What do you think?
Replies (8)
February 17, 2015
I am right there with you. I want a tummy tuck and Ba so bad, but I'm so scared if the outcome..
February 20, 2015
Omg! I am having the exact same issues! I keep thinking what if I come out as one of them deformed pictures or have tons of complications? I am starting to freak myself out by over researching ughhhhh!
February 20, 2015
I think it is completely legitimate to be worried and frightened about a poor outcome or just the risks that come with surgery - I know I am too!!! At the same time though, I don't want fear to stop me from going after the things I want...you definitely need to want it more than you fear it. Remember fear is natural ... And "just means you are about to do something really really brave." All the best ladies!!!
February 22, 2015
I finally shut to internet off And met with my surgeon. Best thing ever! I highly recommend it. I might get on RS once a week, now. My anxiety has decreased significantly. Good luck. You will do great! :-)
February 22, 2015
Good for you! I stopped reading lots before my surgery! Fear doesn't help anyone!
February 20, 2015
I so understand! All those thiugghts are normal. But for me I knew how unhappy I was with my stomach. So for me it was worth it in thee end. :)
April 22, 2015
It's so relieving to know this happened to must of us, I literally run away from my pre op when I started reading the complications and what not of everything, first thoughts were my children will be orphan and the tunnel of thoughts of negativity you get in to is unbelievable, now I laugh and feel how predictable we are ashy man beings and mothers. Congratulations! I'm on my post 11 day :)
UPDATED FROM 83ferfer
6 days pre
Finally feeling free from the bonds of guilt and shame
83ferferMarch 2, 2015
When I initially made the decision for a mommy makeover I was confident I could do this. However, shortly after making my down payment, it got real, real scary. I began to feel a variety of emotions that I did not anticipate: anxiety, nerves, guilt, excitement, fear of the unknown and the known, and lastly, shame. I tried to drowned out the negative emotions in research. I thought if I was prepared enough and understood all possibilities i would feel better. Nope! It made it worse. Believe me, there is such a thing as "knowing too much" ;-) Now, it was the "shame" that was the most damaging. I began to put myself on an emotional island. I would not include my husband in even a discussion of the surgery and when I would engage him in something on my mind I quickly would punish him for the opinion I had solicited. I grew up in an environment where I was confident and happy, proud of the body God gave me. It was beautiful and healthy, and I was taught most importantly beauty is found within, we are all children of God. However, I had cooked up this idea that having "work done" was kind of a slap in the face to God, that His gift of this body wasnt good enough if you had plastic surgery. So here I am, an adult, 3 kids later, still healthy, still comfortable in my own skin, but really wanting something more the gym was never going to give me back. The shame and guilt came from the previous schema of ignorance and self righteousness in contrast with the desire to feel like a woman and the amount of money it was going to take to do so. I kept thinking, "what is wrong with me that I 'need' this? Am I really that insecure? Wait, but I am not an insecure person." Confused, I recognized the emotions but I could not figure out why I felt this consuming shame until I realized, everyone in my world growing up who told me you dont need to change anything to be beautiful had had "work done" at some point: Breast Augs, tummy tucks, lipo, face lifts. Liars! They were all liars! After a good cathartic cry I was able to conclude the following: Now, yes, true beauty is found within but beauty has nothing to do with it. How we look and beauty are two different things. You can look physically good and still be a [RS bleep], beauty escapes you. It is the way we treat others that makes us beautiful. This realization was freeing. We all have a little vanity and IT IS OKAY! I am not a horrible person for wanting something for me. I am not slapping God in the face. I am a woman! A loving kind mother who gives everything to her family, and my sweet husband wants to give something to me. Even if it's a procedure to restore the gift God gave me. Like I said, beauty is not how we look but is the way we treat others. Just like getting braces is not shameful in changing your smile, this surgery is not shameful in the least. I have had a wild ride of emotions this last month and now, I am finally at peace. I am excited. We, husband included, are finally having fun with this. It is a gift, a wonderful thing. Thank you for reading my journey so far as I share these deep unanticipated struggles. I am a work in progress and all the better for the humility and realizations and growth. 'Til next time.
Replies (13)
March 2, 2015
Thanks for sharing that! I definitely feel like I am from a similar background as you... and certainly in the past (before kids) would have frowned on people that had plastic surgery and felt it was insanely vain and why couldn't they be happy with the bodies God gave them? Well, here I am - having a large helping of humble pie and realizing there is much more to it (plastic surgery) than just vanity. My Aunt has had plastic surgery (drastic weight loss) and her advice to me was: this is between you and GOD. If you want to have something done because you want to repair yourself so you feel whole, womanly and just comfortable in your own skin and you have the opportunity? Don't worry about what other people think about it. It is just like you said... people don't judge each other for "changing the smile God gave them" when they get braces... and we shouldn't judge ourselves harshly for wanting to repair what we lost either. Thanks for sharing! My surgery is rescheduled to March 23rd so I'm 3 weeks out. I am actually relieved to have some extra time... for spring cleaning!!! :)
March 3, 2015
I am so glad I am not alone. I appreciate your insight and comments. It is comforting to have all my cyber-bosom-buddies out there (pun intended). Good luck with the up coming surgery. Mine in in 6 days. Eek!
March 13, 2015
I'm pretty sure I went through the same classes you did growing up and still am, active. Love that! But for this too, I understand. Nothing anyone says otherwise helps make this decision any easier for us personally. I think we each have to work through it for our own selves.
Hahaha! I even told my PS---I can't have stripper boobs standing up at the front teaching RS in Church.... you know? He doesn't. But he smiled anyway and promised me I wouldn't.
Thank you for sharing your journey here---we don't know how our words can touch lives, but they do. We do. Every single day.
March 13, 2015
Ha! "Stripper boobs...teaching RS" hilarious! I told my PS. Take me as big as I can go and people still see my face. He laughed and replied that all depends on the person looking at you. Then he followed up with we will go for "classy...a classy look". Done! Thank you for sharing your thoughts. :-)
March 13, 2015
Hahahaha!! Classy! YES! Love that!
You're very welcome, and thank you for being brave to share yours! :O)
March 14, 2015
You have geniunely took the words out of my mouth!!! I sit here eating breakfast, after a hard workout, reveling in the fact my husband told me I am getting pretty small, almost back to pre baby weight. For me its not small enough, because i will never be able to loose this kangaroo pouch! Though you can not tell through my clothing, and my husband doesnt seem to mind it, it breaks my heart everytime I take my clothes off and look in the mirror. I always think, but God gave me this body.....but not like this...lol my kids did this!
I feel very vain for wanting a surgery deemed not medically necessary, and even though my kids have college funds, I somehow feel as if Im spending their tuition or our retirement fund! I tell myself yes, but you have to buy all this clothing to hide your stomach! What if you didnt have to? What if you didnt have to yell at your husband for staring at you naked because your self conscious, or on bad days sneak to kids shower before he notices your gone, just so he wont see what he doesnt mind. But I do. I have 3children ages, 7,5, and 1.5 yrs old. I worked out for almost 4 years consecutively after second daughter. With a permanent work related back injury! I wasnt gonna let anything stop me! In 6mos I went from a size 12 to a size 2, I had lost 45lbs of fat. I continued working out and gained lean muscle, energy, a boat load of confidence and was ready to have surgery! Finally! After stints with P90X (which changed my life), Insanity, The Rack, Brazilian Butt Lift, Zumba, Elliptical, dieting I was finally ready! Fit as a fiddle body, hanging tummy, shriveled boobs and all....I was ready! Ready for trips to Aruba (topless lol I know pretty vain) a brazilian bikini (what) things I could never imagine with post baby body!!! Then on 1/3/13 I found out that my dream was not going to come true because I was pregnant! All that working out to look hot left hubby and I hot and we were Not careful...after months of crying and cursing out the scale during my first trimester, I let it go, and welcomed the idea of a son. I mean really let go and put on almost 70lbs! Though I have worked out right after I was released to do so, my mind didnt line up with my workouts. I was eating....alot. Not really motivated to go all the way, just kinda skating by with well atleast I worked out. I have 3 kids and its stressful so I deserve this Edys half the fat mint chocolate chip ice cream! Half the fat means I can eat twice as much, really I ate 3times that amount. Then I needed something else cause im breast feeding and im hungry (and this is all bout 10oclock at night). My day was hard I deserve this I said. But I didnt nor did my family, my Mom died several years ago due to a massive heart attack at the age of 48, left me behind with a 3 mos old grand daughter and no Grandma to share her with. I had to change my mindset. I cant give up....ever. I am giving it my all. Which brings me back to this morning. Hearing my husband say those words were magic to my ears ( not to my eyes cause I still gotta see that elephant skin on my stomach). But seeing your post had motivated me sooooo much!!!! I cant wait to continue to read your updates. Im going to keep hitting it hard with my P90x3 and keep looking for a Dr! Thank you so much for being brave and posting your before and afters! Cant wait til its my turn!! I have sone questions , if you dont mind, but will ask on a future post because now my fingers are cramping from typing on this phone lol.....aging...the struggle is real lol.
March 14, 2015
Thank you so much for sharing your story with me. You have been on quite a journey so far. You are such an inspiration to continue to work towards your goals even in the face of obstacles. I believe this is an emotional decision as much as it is a physical one. However, the emotional side doesn't seem to be talk about much; the inner struggle that some of us women go through...so let's talk. :-) As for your questions, Ask away. I am here. Remember everyone is worth it, we each have such great worth. i know it, and God sees it. He wants us to be happy, confident and when we do (feel good), we are better women, mothers, caretakers, and friends. Thank you for your words. ♡
March 22, 2015
Oh hon, you are so over thinking this. It is what it is and doesn't mean anything more. Embrace your superficial side. We all have a little in there. It's okay. It doesn't define us or take away from all the good that you are. Happy healing.
March 22, 2015
Words out of my mouth! I felt the exact same way and trust me! You helped me with this post. God bless you!
March 22, 2015
Thank you! I had such a personal struggle and such a liberating moment of realization. I thought, I could not be the only one. I am so glad it helped. Peace and ♡ to you and your family
Replies (10)
Growing humans, lol! That is a big job! I will definitely be following your journey. Here's a list of pre- and post-op tips for you. Keep us posted!