I'll try to make this as brief as possible. 30yrs...
I'll try to make this as brief as possible. 30yrs old, 3 kids, 5'4 and weight fluctuates between 147-160. Pre op was a 36B? Very deflated and just wore the bra for comfort and to appear as though it actually had some sort of boobs.
I had my first augmentation here in town on 6/2015, transaxillary incision, mentor mod profile, 475 filled to 500L/525R. These were 14.2cm in diameter with 4.9cm in projection. He specialized in "natural scarless augmentation" and thought it was absurd that I'd need a lift (one consult I went to recommended a crescent lift on the left side). From the beginning I was unhappy with the shape and size, not the look we discussed. They weren't attractive, just a fuller old me. I have always experienced slight pain in my right breast and at times it appeared a little more round up top. When discussing my concerns my PS said "I don't know what to tell you, buy a new bra" brushed off my concerns and sent me on my way at my 3 month follow up with a $6,000 quote to upsize to a different profile.
12/2015 I had my revision, or implant exchange with a new surgeon. We switched the saline out for silicone. This time through the inframammary fold, Allergan Natrelle, style 45(uhp) 700cc on both sides. These are 13.6cm diameter with 6.4cm projection. There seemed to be a mix up from the beginning as I thought we were doing HP, and left the size up to him depending on what fit best in surgery. He too must have thought he used HP instead of UHP based on his notes in my chart. All was well in the beginning, no where near the pain I experienced the first time around. All of a sudden around 3 months post op I started experiencing pain on the left side. Thought I was over reacting and that it was nerve regeneration. Well as the months passed (March2016-August2016 to be exact) it became more persistent, all while my PS insisted that it wasn't the implants or surgery sending me on my way spending less than 10 minutes at a time with me when I'd go in to see him. The last time I saw him, his comments were less than polite or sympathetic and I left the office crying. His proposal was to open me up, downsize about 200cc and close me back up, nothing more. All for about the cost of implants, bra and maybe anesthesia fees.
Since then I have been on the search for a new PS to help me rectify this mess I've gotten myself into. I found a PS about an hour away who brought some light to the situation, advising that although my nipples weren't pointing down or sagging to my belly button, the reason I was unhappy from the beginning was due to me needing a full lift (lollipop or anchor) to reshape the breast, reposition the areola and downsize the areola.. along with implants of course. Although she was more helpful than my last 2 PS's Her short time in practice scared me and as you can imagine I'm a traumatized from this all wondering who I can trust to just fix my boobs so I can move on with my life! Not to mention all of the costs of all of this. I've been a member on realself for quite some time (under a different user name) and have followed many different ladies on here for quite a while and decided that I was going to search for a dr out of town. I kept coming back to dr. Vath in Denver, CO and all the amazing work he has done. I've read nothing bad about him, the reviews seem legit, his scars are near perfection, the man just seems like he's awesome at his job and he stands by his work..which is something I need at this point considering everyThing I've been through, should there be any complications I need a surgeon who will do anything they can to help me without brushing me off and charging me an arm and a leg!!
Here's to better, new, long lasting results!!! Will post more details regarding my phone consult and booking surgery soon...
Just a random update...nerves--clinic staff--traveling arrangements--etc....
There's so much I've been wanting to share but haven't really had a 'reason' to add an update and not to mention I've been busy and trying not to obsess. Obsessing has only led to anxiety, stress, worry and time going sooooo slooooowww. But there are a few things I want to share and journal about.. so here it goes. Hopefully I don't bore anyone and please excuse my jumping all over from thought to thought.
I will first start out by saying that I was like 90% sure I was choosing dr vath before my consult, but after securing a date and putting down my $500 deposit I started questioning my decision and my own judgement as I don't want to nake a third mistake!! Stressful to say the least... I will say that Kari (my patient counselor) has been amazing!! From responding to my emails and answering calls and my questions.. she has been great! She's put my nerves at ease and has spent so much more time with me just bringing me back to reality and comforting me than I have gotten from both of my past surgeons. I need this.. and I love this!! All clinics and surgeons need this!! Makes me feel like I'm dealing with my regular primary dr, someone who cares, is supportive and knowledgeable, and isn't feeding me a line of bull!! She spent a decent amount of time with me on the phone last week and never once made me feel rushed or like I was wasting her time! Did I mention I need this?! :)
Secondly, after becoming more aware of my symptoms from discomfort and just being the overly analytical person I am, I believe that my left breast (the one that hurts) is not under the muscle as it's supposed to be. The muscle appears to be over the top of my implant, rather than being stretched over/across the implant it's almost like the implant was shoved up inside and the muscle is shoved up on top of the implant. Which explains the flex animation, being able to feel the implant under my areola, the pulling feeling from my sternum across the top of my breast to my armpit area AND the reason why wearing a bra hurts (added support if the implant pressing up and stretching my muscle more). I hope to god that this can be fixed and that it won't go back up over the implant with this next surgery.!!
Third, along the lines of traveling for surgery I've taken some tips from another RS member and i believe we have found the best (and most cost effective) route for flight, hotel and car rental. Southwest is definitely cheapest airline and Costco definitely has the best deal for car rental.. still trying to figure out the hotel stay :)
-- along this note I have my pre op nov 21 with the nurse and I am currently waiting for a packet in the mail with additional information. We are flying out 2 days before surgery. The next day I will have my pre op and meet dr vath in person and the big day the following day (on a Thursday) I have decided not to leave until Monday as I wanted a follow up before I head home and to allow time for any unforeseen complications, so the following Monday I will see the nurse and we will fly home later that night. I'm hoping Tuesday night and Wednesday before surgery we can explore the area, have some fun alone time and make the best of our "mini vacation" as I'm not too sure I'll be able to be out and about after surgery like I was with my revision, but I suppose we will see when the time comes.
Lastly, size!!! Ohhhh dreaded size.. the 2nd hardest part about this whole ordeal (1st finding the right PS ;-) ) I'm on the fence with size and I know I have a while to think about this but it's driving me nuts!! I keep analyzing the sizing charts and I feel like I'm going from one extreme to the other or not small enough.. ugh! Sucks!! Thankfully my husband has been so supportive this time around. We've talked so much this time and I wish I had his support like this the first time.
Ok that's it for now, I know I'm missing something and I definitely plan to add pictures at some point. I know it doesn't take long to update and add pictures however I wanted to add more detailed pictures to try to better illustrate my concerns/problem areas and sadly don't have time to do that right now, but I promise to soon so it's easier to VISUALLY see what I am trying to explain..i can be more of a visual person at times ;-)
until next time... xoxo :)
Received my surgical packet in the mail!!
I just wanted to post a quick update.. I received my surgical packet in the mail today and HOLY MOLY! Lots of useful, important information. Nothing compared to the information I received from the last 2 surgeons, that's for sure! Starting to become a pro at this.. :-/ I told my husband when this is all said and done I'll be able to work in this field guiding and hand holding the patients and I should get a job at a cosmetic surgery center... lol... laughing, but serious haha! But in all seriousness my packet is more than helpful, answers any of my little "worry" questions in the back of my mind and then some but at the same time not overload and very honest and straight forward--no surprises! I feel like I'm in good hands :) with everything else going on in the real world right now this is a very reassuring feeling especially considering I am an out of town patient and haven't had the chance to meet the Dr, staff or visit the clinic in person yet I feel a great sense of inner peace. Overall I will say that all of the obsession and panic and ups and downs I felt the last two times is nothing I am experiencing this time around! More so just making sure I'm doing everything right as far as booking flight, hotel and car which is a whole new world to me!
Any who, I feel like this was a long post/update just to share how much I LOVED the detailed, honest and informative packet I received in the mail today :):) but why the heck not share this in case anyone else needs the help or reassurance of my surgery experience! (Oh and I'm still working on the picture deal, I actually forgot until JUST NOW.. I've been dealing with some other things that have taken priority, unfortunately, but I do know photos will help others and my review so please be patient with me as my life settles down and I find time to make a detailed update with these photos. I want the photos and my update to be detailed and not scattered all over with my thoughts all over the place)
All for now!! TaTa!!!
Hopefully these upload ok and are easy to view. I just wanted to add the round smooth silicone mentor and natrelle sizing charts to my review for both mod plus and high profile since I have spent much time analyzing them along my journey and I figured they could help someone else.
Pictures as promised!
Whelp!! Here they are in all of their glory!! My befores, after my first BA, and then my 2nd surgery (implant exchange) which are my current. I tried to draw on them with different colors to show the various areas of pain which I will try to explain.
The one photo that is sort of from the bottom view where ou can sort of see my incision and I have one line and a circle--when I press my implant upward toward my collar bone it feels like a vein pulling my nipple down. The area inside the circle is where I feel something under the skin/tissue. Almost like a ripple in the implant shell.. it's strange and that nipple is often very sensitive or tender.
Then the side view where I drew a red circle near my armpit I have some small "dents" which is where the muscle feels "pulled" on.
Then the picture with all the different lines.. lol well I explained the pulling from my fold to my nipple, the green arrow from my cleavage to the side is where the muscle seems like it's slid up and is no longer on top of my implant and it feels like it's pulling from my cleavage to the side near my armpit, and the red line underneath by my fold is where it will feel tight at times like there is a rubber band underneath making it feel tight and constricted.
The photo with the black arrow is me flexing and how that one side causing me pain has the deformity, it's hard to get a good picture of the muscle when I flex to show what I actually see in real life. I'll try to add info to the captions too. Embarrassing :-/
"Trust your surgeon" and "Go bigger", "I wish I went bigger"
I forgot to add something to my last posts, but that's ok, this can go in its own little mini review since it's just some of my frustrations I heard early on and things I hear all the time now that I think EVERYONE SHOULD CONSIDER going into this and that I wish I knew back then when I started all of this, maybe then I wouldn't be in this mess.
"Trust your surgeon" - don't trust anyone!! Lol all jokin aside, in all seriousness I tried this whole "trust" thing and in the end I shut off my own inner intuition and gut feeling thinking I could trust my Dr and his patient coordinator. First make sure you find a surgeon that has good reviews and you like the pictures of their after photos.. the shape, incisions etc. make sure you ask questions and ask them all! Don't feel 'stupid' asking questions, this is a big commitment and if they can't answer your questions they probably aren't the right surgeon for you! Once you have done your research and find who you like and have booked surgery with them...then trust your surgeon! Trust that after he/she has educated you and answered all your questions (without any lines of bull) that they will take care of you and your end result.
"Always go bigger" "i wish I went bigger" -- When I say this in speaking of the REAL boob greed, not the issues with implants being too narrow or not fitting your frame properly. I see this all the time and I was a victim of this myself!! I admit it!! However in my case I didn't think I needed a lift so I was unhappy with the shape of my breasts which was what prompted the revision, I was also unhappy with the lack of projection and upper pole, yes I wanted bigger than my first set, however I think that had I gotten a full lift the first time around this would have given them a different illusion and I would have been happier with their appearance. But remember that going up 25-50 CC's really isn't going to make much of a visual difference so it's probably best that you didn't go larger. Larger implants have higher risks of malpositoning, pain, irreversible damage to your tissue and it's just not a good idea. Don't ignore all the things people say about large implants.. there is different things I have read about what "large" is, some say anything over 375 and some say large is anything over 500.
My whole point is even though we want this surgery and sometimes it's hard to be patient, donyour research even if that means a year or two or five years of research.. you want to get it done right the first time in good skilled hands because it's hard to take back or undo lots of complications. I don't say this to scare anyone but I think it's real and not many people talk about this but it should be talked about more often.
3 weeks to go!!
Reality has set in!! I've got 3 weeks until my surgery and 19 days until we fly out!! :O I can't believe how time went by so fast this time around, at the time of booking surgery it seemed far out, although I know many others have had to wait close to a year for their surgery. I will say even though I am impatient and want things done "now", the extra time is always great no matter the circumstance to help avoid any impulsiveness, come to terms or reality with the decision you are making and to let your nerves settle. The first two times before my surgery I was a complete basket case! Between researching size, trying to find "wish boob" pictures, 2nd guessing my Dr's and the things they told me that were conflicting because I'm such an analytical person, researching crap online... jeez I pretty much set myself up for panic attacks!! I am doing well, not stressing or obsessing with my decision in my dr or size really, however I am still not settled on a size JUST yet. I do worry from time to time about delayed wound healing or the possibility of necrosis, but not to the point of panick mode by any means.
My patient counselor Kari emailed yesterday, I thought it was such a nice warm email from her.. she asked how I was doing and if I was excited about my upcoming procedure, reminded me of my pre op w the nurse that is next week (along with the details--time, what I need:surgery packet, and that they would call me) and she sent me a very gentle heads up that it is now time to pay. I don't know if their patient care and communication thus far could be any better.. it has exceeded my expectations and totally what I need after all I've been through with my past two surgeons. I received two emails with links to pay, one for the remaining fees and the other for anesthesia if I remember correctly.
I have a few questions that I honestly can't even think of at the moment because I've been trying to be more relaxed this time around, but I wrote them down and they are in my surgery packet so I have them available when I talk with the nurse next week. I decided to go this route since they don't NEED to be answered right this moment and I figured some may be answered when we talk on the phone.
Aside from all of this, what I have done this time around is more research on preparing my body for surgery to ensure I am healthy as I can possibly be. I don't workout but have wanted to, life has just been too busy! However I am looking at nutrition since that plays a big role also.. Thanks to another realselfer on her I bought some protein powder to make smoothies, I was only going to drink them after surgery to help with my healing but decided to get some and start now along with lots of clean eating, cottage cheese, yogurt, eggs, chicken, broccoli, green peppers, peanuts/peanut butter, apples, bananas, red grapes, oranges, along with lots of water! I will be honest and say i am not a healthy eater typically, I love carbs and all the yummy stuff, so I guess you can say I'm sort of "detoxing" my body of anything that can cause your tissue to not heal as fast and trying to pump myself with things that will (or is supposedly supposed to) help with healing so the plan is to keep this up after surgery. I've also cut out caffeine and oddly it seems like the pain in my left breast isn't really there... or isn't as intense, I've been able to wear a normal bra without it hurting so bad that I need to rip the sucker off! But I will say something still feels "off" I can't lay on that side without feeling an achy sensation and feeling like the implant is misplaced. My right side pretty much feels like it's part of me and doesn't cause any problems for me whereas my left one feels foreign.
Lastly.. I'm a little nervous about flying and being away from the kids. I haven't left them for this long and I haven't been on a plane since I was a kid! I think I am more nervous about making it to the airport on time, flying and making sure we have everything, luggage is ok, the car rental and hotel all go smoothly and that we find the hotel ok, more than I am worried about the surgery itself! Lol
Sorry for such a long update, I'm long winded what can I say :) hopefully no typos as I sit here typing this on my phone, hah! I plan to update next when I meet dr vath the day before surgery, but will see how I feel after my pre op, I may be so excited to share how it went or gloat over how amazing the nurse is..they have all been great so far! That's it for now!! :)
3 more days, but who's counting?! And "mom guilt" ... I'm a big baby right now!!
So my surgery is in 3 days and over the weekend I did a bunch of preparation and cleaning our entire house.. washing, folding and organizing clothes, grocery shopping, organizing the house and making sure we have everything we need to fly out and to make sure the kids have everything they need before we take off. I felt like a chicken running around with its head cut off and sort of like a 9 month pregnant woman nesting! I really am just trying to take it easy and not get myself stressed out but the honest truth is I am so worried... I've never left my kids alone for more than one night and last night before bed my youngest was asking me 101 questions, he was so wired and it was past his bed time. I could tell he was overly anxious and scared but that it was coming out in his behavior by acting silly. He started to cry and while we were talking, the whole time his eyes were watering and I could tell he was just so sad and scared and didn't want me to leave no matter how much I reassured him. He's also got special needs so I'm so nervous as to how things will go not only at home but really at school! I hope he's able to handle it and when he started showing all these emotions my mom guilt set in.. so bad that if I could cancel the whole surgery and call it off and not lose any money I put into this between surgery fees, flight, hotel, etc. I probably would have canceled it! I just felt (and still do) so guilty, selfish and wrong for doing all of this, like I am causing an unnecessary burden on my whole family for something elective and so minor in life. I know this is all my nerves talking and I'm 100% sure I want this and that I am going to go forward with it, but it really breaks my heart to see my kid so worried like he was, I even contemplated seeing if I could purchase another ticket for him to come along! Ughhh I'm so weak!!
We're flying out tomorrow and reality has definitely set in.. on a positive note, I cannot wait to see the clinic and meet Dr. Vath and the rest of the staff in person!