I had a BA in July 2016, I was super excited and...
I had a BA in July 2016, I was super excited and following my post-op instructions to the T, I was waiting patiently for the implants to drop and fluff. Although I felt went too small and wished for bigger breasts. I even spoke to my PS about my wish and he told me he would give me a discount when I was ready for the exchange. I even planned, that after one year and saving up some money, I would go back and have my implants exchanged. But all my hopes and dreams fell to the ground when one day I noticed my left breast had shifted towards my armpit and my breasts looked disfigured. I knew something was absolutely wrong. I voiced my concerns to my PS but he also acknowledged that my left implant did shift laterally, but he told me I should wait for the implants to drop and they would look more normal. But I knew then even if the implant settled the left breast would not come back to the center. I became very depressed and going every where for an answer if some one could make my breasts look normal again. In the mean time I consulted a new PS who told me my original PS didn't dissect the pockets right and I would be needing Capsulorrhaphy to fix the displacement....so here I am now, decided to ditch my other blog about BA and begin this new blog about my journey to the world of BA Revision. I feel that crying or feeling miserable is not going to help me. No mater how depressed I feel and how much I dislike the hideous look of my current augmented breasts, I still have to wait 6 months before anything can be done to make my breasts looks descent again. Instead of feeling sorry for myself for my bad luck and going on and on about how much I hated my breasts, or how angry my PS made me feel, I just want to move forward and see my failed augmentation from a different perspective. I want to talk about my hope, my wish and my dream of having those perky beautiful breasts again within the complexity I have developed. This time I would like to believe I am wiser and I intend to do my thorough research before making any final decision. I hope this journey of mine will end with happiness and I will be able to find that surgeon who will be able to help me to make my dream come true...:)
Height: 5'8", Weight: 140 lbs, Age: 44, Pre-op Breast size 32A possibly 32AA.
Hoping for 32D without any further complications....
Please keep me in your prayers...:) Thank you...
Bra shopping for crooked breasts!!
The PS here advised me to wear a bra at all time ( I think) to support my injured breast so that the displacement doesn't get worse. So I went bra shopping today! All these days I was going bra less as advised by my PS, just wearing a cami for the implants to "drop and fluff"!! Unfortunately that didn't work, my boobs never fluffed!!
I have been always a VS lady ( not sure why) per VS I was 32C!! But now I have no idea what my current bra size is, and I was not going to shop at VS and spend tons of money on bra's if I am going to have a revision in 5 months time, so I went to Hane's outlet store! I asked the sales lady at the Hane's store to measure me, she did her stuff and told me I was 34B. I tried Bali wireless 34B, OMG I looked like a porn star with my deformed boobs sticking out of my tight B cups!! I ditched the B cup and tried on C cup which felt ok but my boobs felt too snug and was hurting, so I opted for 34D. They felt comfy to me, may be a bit loose around the cup but I didn't care, I was able to squeeze my left boob inside and I was happy! I came into the conclusion that its very hard to buy bra's when boobs do not fit inside the cups! As usual I started to curse at me PS while I was inside the fitting room quietly, sales lady must have thought I was a nutcase! Oh I also informed her I had a botched boob job! I know I lost all my shame..:(
So I will be wearing the bra's to try to keep some integrity of my existing pockets....I feel like I am formulating my own theories now how to preserve the boobs...lol I should just go back to school and study medicine and add the MD beside my name, then it will be all official..but I am too old for that stuff now, I should just remained focus on my current situation...my deformed boobs!!
Finding the properly fitted bra's with asymmetrical and deformed breasts with malpositioned/displaced implants
As I mentioned yesterday trying to find a properly fitted bra has turned out to be challenge for me with my laterally displaced breast. I did not have the courage to go to Nordstorm yet and get my bra's professionally fitted. Even though I would like to tell myself I am not shy about talking about my distorted breast augmentation but deep inside me I know I am super conscious about the way my breasts look. So I have been trying to utilize internet to educate myself about how to measure bra size properly. I just feel that those sales ladies in those regular clothing stores really do not know much about bra fitting. If they did I would not be advised to buy 34C bra's by VS prior to my BA ( they were way too big for me!) and 34B by the sales ladies at Hane's outlet store post augmentation ( B cup was squeezing the life out of my breasts!). So I came into this really great website that teaches you how to measure your bra size and what to consider when buying a proper fitting bra. Here is the link http://www.sophisticatedpair.com/bra-size-calculator
When you wind up having distorted breasts I think you really should not care about the look anymore, your priority should be the welfare of your health, ie maintaining the integrity of the remaining breast tissue, skin, and the pockets.
I also realized these bra's are helping me to reduce the nagging neck/back pain I was having on my left problematic side ever since I had the surgery. So all I needed is the support to hold my breast in place so that it would not pull my pec muscle to the side which is some how pulling my neck and back muscle and giving me the chronic pain ( well at least that's what I think, as I never ever suffered from neck/back pain before surgery and the pain is only localized on me left side). If the bra's can give me some comfort, may be I can attempt to wait full one year before the revision. I was questioning myself if 6 months is too early to go for pocket revision because I got this impression that if the capsule is not mature enough, the sutures will not be able to hold the implants in place and I may have displacement again. So I was wondering if waiting one year would be a better option for me. But if I continue to have this pain waiting one year will destroy me. I have many questions and I will be asking all these to my consulting surgeons as I see them the next few weeks!
Sorry for rumbling on and on...I just want to share with you as may be one of you who are facing the same challenges as I am now may find my thoughts useful! Have a blessed day...:)
I went to see Dr. West of Orange today. He was very professional and seemed knowledgeable. His staff were also very welcoming. His clinic did not look and feel like a mass producing boob shop! He spent a lot of time explaining to me what went wrong and how he could make it better. The part that I liked about him the most is that he did not make any derogatory remarks towards my original PS. As much as I absolutely dislike my PS and like to hear when other doctors tell me he messed me up and he is an idiot but at the same time I feel that all physicians should maintain certain degree of professionalism and not put down any of their colleagues regardless of their opinions of the shitty works that their colleagues have done, or at least not in front of their patients. He was very professional about the whole thing. He also gave me the options to fix my problems without any surgical interventions and also the choice of just fixing my left breast. I suppose he was trying to help me by cutting down the cost and the trauma? But I told him I hated my saline implants, so the only choice we had was surgery. He specializes in reconstructive surgery for breast cancer patients. So I feel like he knows what he is doing, if he can make patients with mastectomy look normal again, he can do the same to me. My issues are small compared to the issues the breast cancer survivors go through and I admire their courage. You also have to have some soft corner in your heart to deal with these patients, you can not be just doing it for the money. I still have few more consultations and lets see where it takes me. Have a blessed day...:)
Waiting is making me go insane!
This whole waiting game is literally making me loose my mind. Also the confusion and uncertainty are making me act like an idiot! I have already sent three emails to my new PS with various questions even though I am not even his patient yet officially! The first question was if I can resume my workout as I am fearful that I may cause more damage to my pockets, he said I can exercise! Today I asked him if I needed to take antibiotics prior to having dental procedure such as root canal since I read online some PS advise their patients to take antibiotics so that the bacteria from the gum doesn't migrate to the implants causing Capsular Contracture. My PS said I didn't have to. I feel like an overly anxious idiot! I swear if I continue to send emails with all these dumb questions my PS will soon fire me!! This whole experience has traumatized me so much I have lost all my confidence on anything and I am needing constant reassurance that I am doing everything alright and my boobs will not get damaged any further. To top it off this sudden toothache from my crown is driving me even more crazy. I see my dentist tomorrow. I can't wait for February to come so that I can have my revision successfully and move forward with my life and not be so paranoid about doing anything wrong and stop being so obsessed with my stupid boobs!! I honestly need to stop reading about BA online, the more I google and read, the more confused I get!! I feel really bad for my new PS, he has to deal with my nonsense!!
Oh Btw I retained Dr. West for my revision and ditched my original surgeon!
I forgot to mention I have retained Dr. West to be my surgeon for my revision. I have delightfully left my original PS and canceled my 3 months appointment, as going to his clinic makes me more depressed! I have been pestering Dr. West with all my stupid questions! He has been kind enough and replying back to me with an answer!! I am scheduled to have my surgery on February 2nd 2017. It will be 7 months after my original BA. I honestly can not wait for 2016 to be over and have my boobs fixed so that I can move on with my life. I am a very impatient individual, I feel like good Lord is testing me by making me wait the next four months!! I was supposed to be going bra shopping at this point, now I am still shopping for boobs!! lolol ....This is the consequences of immediate gratification!
How to get fitted for a bra after breast augmentation
I was browsing and as usual I am still pretty much obsessed with boobs! I came across this website where it teaches you how to measure your bra size post BA, apparently it's done as the same way as some one with natural breast tissue!! Oh my, I never knew that! So here is the link: http://www.herroom.com/measure-bra-size-with-implants,904,30.html
May be we are not measuring ourselves properly and that's why we are all getting confused about our post augmented bra/cup size.
I copy pasted a portion of it here, just to give you an idea!!
"Band Size with Breast Implants
Breast implant surgery should not change your band size. But, calculating your band size with implants is performed exactly the same way described in “Step 1” of our Bra size calculator where we explain how to measure for your bra’s band size.
Cup Size with Breast Implants
Measuring for your new cup size is not the same method as the measuring system for normal breast tissue. With your tape measure parallel to the floor, measure your breast from where your breast begins in your cleavage, across your breast apex, then over to where your breast ends near the armpit. With this measurement, and your band measurement, use this table below to determine your cup size:
(See measurement instructions above) 32" band
(27-28" ribcage): 34" band
(29-30" ribcage): 36" band
(31-32" ribcage): 38" band
6.5" FULL A
7" B A
7.5" FULL B FULL A
8" C B A
8.5" FULL C FULL B FULL A
9" D C B A
9.5" FULL D FULL C FULL B FULL A
10" DD D C B
10.5" FULL DD FULL D FULL C FULL B
11" DDD DD D C
11.5" FULL DDD FULL DD FULL D FULL C
12" DDD DD D
12.5" FULL DDD FULL DD FULL D
13" DDD DD
13.5" FULL DDD FULL DD
Additional Note: One possible side effect of implants can be permanently erect nipples. HerRoom has several products known as “nipple concealers” to hide this "caught in the headlights" look. Additionally, contour bras where there is a thin layer of foam in the cups can have enough padding to eliminate this look as well. "
Check out their website to get more detail of it, quiet interesting!!
How much do the silicone implants weigh?
Found an interesting formula while googling!!
Silicone Breast Implant Weight
1cc weighs 0.0375 oz.
To calculate the weight of silicone implants, use the following formula:
Weight for a set of 300cc breast implants
300cc x 2 = 600cc (for both implants)
600cc x 0.0375 = 22.5 oz.
To convert ounces into pounds, divide the total of 22.5 oz. by 16 (there are 16 ounces in 1 pound)
22.5 ÷ 16 = 1.40625 lbs. which can be rounded to 1.41 lbs.
A shorter way is to take the weight of both implants and then divide by 426.67. Example:
300cc x 2 = 600cc
600cc ÷ 426.67 = 1.406 lbs.
Going back to my staying fit and healthy routine after hiding in a hole with depression!!
Well after four long months I have decided to pay a visit to my gym! Prior to my first surgery I used to run, dance, do free weights, and occasionally go hiking if I found a partner. I was a very active 44 years old lady! But after having BA I had to put my active life on hold and it got even worse after I found out I had to have a revision. I stopped doing any physical activities with the fear that my boobs will get damaged even more!
After getting much needed reassurance from Dr. West I felt confident to do the things that I used to enjoy. Today I ran for an hour, I felt pretty good considering the long break I took! Now I am so sore I feel like I got ran over by a truck!!
I wore a maximum support sport bra made by Champion to encapsulate my boobs so that they would stay in place and would not wobble!! The bra did an excellent job!
Another reason I wanted to go back to my routine, it's not only because I wanted to come out of the hole of depression but also to get myself fit and my muscles strong so that they can support my new heavy boobies!! I feel that one of the reasons why many of us get back pain after BA its because our muscles are not toned enough to support the implants. I have four months to get myself some what toned to support the 500cc/550cc girls!!
I am sore but feeling really good and positive....:)
Having a bad day....:(
This waiting is getting on my nerves. I wish February would just show up quick! I have been looking for jobs, came into the realization that I can not advance my career unless I take further educations, as the job market is very competitive nowadays. The more degrees you have the better chances you have in advancing. So I was researching about going back to school, but I can not even think about enrolling because of my up coming surgery in February.
To make mater worse, I am telling my hubby not to go out of state for work purposes because I have no one to care for me after my surgery. I will be restricted to what I could do and he is the only one I have who can care for me.
Its like my whole life in on hold because of these stupid boobs and this stupid surgery. I am also holding my hubby back from what he wants to do. I could have been enjoying my life now and do the things I want to do if my incompetent ex-Ps did not f*** me up with his shitty work..( sorry for cursing)...Or if I did not trust him....Oh I am so mad....why did I go to him...:(
One wrong decision can screw us so much....I can see it will be a miserable winter for me....sigh
3 months post op ( the first surgery) picture... its as good as gonna get... :(
My implants dropped more but It seems to this is as good as gonna get.... cant wait for my revision. I absolutely hate these boobs....:(
Some more pictures I took today to give you a better idea of the awesome work done by my first PS!!
My sad boobs are saying hi to you!
Trying to stay away from thinking about boobs, talking about boobs or looking at boobs!!
I have been so preoccupied with my botched boob job, I feel like these days my life revolves around only boobs! All I think about is boobs, when I will get my two perfect boobs! To make mater worse I am completely addicted to RS!
So today I was trying to take an oath, I would not think about boobs, talk about boobs, dream about boobs, and would not open RS until January 2017, one month before my surgery, but do you think I was able to keep my promise?
Noooo I havn't , I am here again typing away nonsense....Dear Lord have mercy on me! No more boobs!!!
Unbelievable! What a nightmare I am going through....
The lawyer of my first surgeon sent me a letter threatening to take legal action against me if I did not delete my reviews of that surgeon from RS and another website!! He said I was lying and he did not do anything wrong, but the pictures of my breasts are the proof of his not so admirable surgical skills!!
I know its absolutely wrong how he was threatening me for expressing my opinion and part of me want to fight but I am so exhausted and traumatized I really do not wish to deal with any litigation, so I have deleted all my reviews pertaining to him. I know another patient of him who also wrote negative reviews about him has deleted her post. Her situation was worse than mine. I have this hunch she was also threatened by him.
I just want to have my revision surgery in Feb and move on with my life. I absolutely can not wait for 2016 to be over and I hope and pray 2017 will bring me some hope and happiness.
2 more months to go, doing some preparation with the anticipation of my upcoming surgery!
Just wanted to share with you all the ladies who are preparing for their BA surgery. I saw this types of device was being used by another Realselfer here, I can't exactly remember who it was! I thought it was quiet amazing how it works, specially if you don't have a recliner to sleep on during the first few weeks after surgery, when you are asked to sleep up right on a sitting/reclining position. During my first surgery I used 7-8 pillows to prop myself up, it was very uncomfortable. So today I took advantage of the Black Friday sale and ordered this from Amazon!! I got $3 off...lol
Happy New Year!! One more month to go before my big day!
2017 is finally here! It felt like forever to get here but it is finally here! I have one more month to wait before my breasts are fixed and made descent again! Oh boy what a journey it was, I never ever thought BA would bring so much grief and misery in my life and destroy me both emotionally and physically. I feel like my half of year 2016 was ruined because of the poor workmanship of an incompetent arrogant and uncaring surgeon. I thought 2017 would never come, waiting 6 months before having a revision seemed forever to me. But it's over now and I am here!! Thank you God!! From this day forward I just want to be optimistic and happy and savor the excitement that one usually feels before her BA or any body modification surgery.
I am debating on if I should buy some post op bra's. But I absolutely have no idea what size to get as I don't know what my post op breast size will be. I certainly will send a email to my new PS. I just want to be prepared. I will be busy the next few weeks finishing up my lab works, getting my prescriptions filled, going for pre-op appointments.
Part of me is super excited and other part is somewhat afraid, I am not afraid of the surgery itself, I am afraid of the anesthesia, going to sleep and not waking up or feeling the pain of every incision my surgeon makes on my body!! ( Don't lough now, I know I know I am just a very overly dramatic person!!) No mater how many surgeries I had in my life ( I think it's only three!!) I can never get used to the thought of going under and getting cut up!! I hope they give me an Ativan before strapping me down on the table!!
Anyway I wish you all a very happy and prosperous 2017. Please pray for me. I will keep you posted with my journey. Cheers...:)
Today I had my lab work done, also picked up my prescribed medications... Valium, Percocet and an antibiotic. Also ordered some Fruit of the Looms front open sports bra's as advised by some good RS friends here!! Filled up my pantry with Premier Protein shakes, they are on sale in Costco. I learned protein boost the tissue healing, so I will be adding protein shakes in my diet while I recover. I am also trying to keep my self healthy, wearing a mask at work the whole 12 hours so that I don't catch the cold/flu. Also practicing my hand hygiene vigorously. Swallowing all my multivitamins and minerals along with Emergen C and Airbourne supplements to boost my immunity!! The unit is filled with patients and staff members who are ill with the seasonal cold and flu like symptoms. I certainly can not afford to get ill three weeks prior to my surgery. I have to organize my kitchen so that all my food, drinks and medications are easily accessible and I will not have to raise my arms up to reach them! Oh boy its getting closer!!
Today I had my pre-op. Signed whole bunch of consent papers. I was cleared medically by the PA. Both my Doctor and the PA gave me whole bunch of information. I thought I got it all but I can not remember a thing!! Am I the only one who is going lunatic two weeks prior to the surgery? I feel like I have butterflies in my stomach. I do this and do that, nothing seems to settle my overly hyperactive nerves!! I must say this time I got more detailed post op instructions which I appreciate. Now I am just counting my days and keeping my fingers crossed I don't get sick.
One week to go!
Omg! One week to go!! Last year when I was all depressed, confused, angry I never thought this day would ever come, waiting 6 months before going for a revision seemed a life time to me, I would cry and cry, drove my hubby, my friends crazy, I would post questions to all the doctors here, I would ask the fellow RS ladies questions looking for an answer, not to mention all the appointments for consults I went through, flushed my hideous looking boobs to the doctors and the nurses, just to see if they could be made pretty and presentable again. I never knew a sets of boobs can cause so much emotional and physical pain to a person. Here I am now, one week to go!! So so happy!!
I stopped taking my vitamins/ medications today, my dearest hubby set up the bed in his downstair study room using the wedge pillow I got from Amazon so that I can easily hop on to the bed! The bed in our bedroom upstair is on a high platform and he feels it will be hard for me to climb on it! How sweet of him. He loaded up the fridge with jello, soup and of course with my protein shakes. The front closure fruit of the looms bras are here, all washed and ready to be worn! I have the OCD, I have to wash everything before I wear them!!
Originally I asked my doctor to give me max of 550cc HP, now I emailed his back and asked him to order 600cc. I think I will need extra few 100 cc to see any difference. My doctor gave me a antimicrobial body wash and I am instructed to wash my self starting three days prior to my surgery. I also added nipple reduction!! I am hoping I will be able to wear regular cloths and non padded bras without having to worry my head lights are showing!!
I will be checking into the surgery center at 630 am and the surgery is scheduled for 830 am. We will be staying in a hotel near the surgery center to beat the busy morning traffic. I will be wearing a pj to the surgery center, so that I can sleep all day long after the surgery! Anesthesia makes me sick to my stomach, even though I know I am supposed to be walking after surgery but I have to sleep until the anesthesia wears off. If I wear my comfy PJ, I can go directly to my comfy bed!!!
I am just trying to be smart this time!! Hope this this the last time...:)
One more sleep!
So finally the The Day is here! One more sleep. We have checked into a hotel to beat the morning traffic. My surgery is at 1115 am and with recovery and everything I will be done by 4 pm. I am eating like a pig as I have to go nothing by mouth after midnight. I am asked to wash myself with the antibacterial body wash, that stuff is nasty, made my skin go all dry! I am so anxious and worried....:( Please keep me in your prayers..... Hugzzz
All done! Now on the way to recovery!
Today is the 2nd day post op. Last night my kind doctor called me to see how I was doing. Surprisingly I did really well in regards to post op nausea from the Anesthesia. I have asked the very kind anesthesiologist to load me up with some nausea medication, which she did. She also gave me a scopolamine patch. After I got home I did not experience any nausea whats soever . The pain was a little bit more intense this time around. Extra strength Tylenol did not help me this time, I had to take Percocet. I am feeling more pain on my left breast ( the problem child!) I am also having really hard time sleeping with my head propped up. I was up most of the night with lower back pain. If I sit straight I feel fine, the moment I lay on my back I feel excruciating lower back pain. I just hope it will get better.
So my Dr told me he had to release the muscles at the bottom and near the sternum. He said the muscles were not released properly and thats why my implants were sitting high. I wonder if because of all the cutting I am having such a bad pain. He gave me 650 cc silicone ( I know they sound gigantic!!) He said they looked really good on me! He also used my previous incision around my nipples. I questioned him about developing CC but he said my saline implants were soft and did not have any CC so he felt comfortable with using the same incision site. He usually does incision around the fold for his brand new patient. The nipple reduction was postponed. He just wanted to make sure I had enough blood circulation to my nipples, he said he will do it once I am all healed and it will be done with local anesthesia at his clinic. I have a drain on my left breast, it will be taken out next week. My breasts are still covered with a post op bra and Ace wrap over it, I still haven't looked at them! The nurse told me I can take off my ace wrap tomorrow before I have a shower. I will get to see my boobs tomorrow!! I am kind of scared!!
The surgery center I went to is a very nice facility. They nurses were very caring and attentive. So far I am very pleased with the service I received from Dr West and his staff and also the people at the surgery center.
Once I open my dressing I will take a pictures and share with you ladies!
Thank you again for all your supports and prayers...:) xoxoxo
Getting paranoid!! Some more clear pictures!
Do you think its looking normal at this stage? Will they drop more? Just getting a bit paranoid! I developed a blister on my left side, may be the ace wrap was irritating my skin. My Dr said he had to release the muscles at the bottom and also at my sternum. He also said my breast would look cone shaped initially since I went for bigger implants and the breasts will evolve and the skin need to be stretched. Despite all the reassurance and explanation he has given me I am still feeling anxious!! Many eyes are better than two!! May be you ladies can shed some lights!!
Just for a comparison!
Just adding some before and now pictures for comparison!!
Post op visit and drain is out!!!
Today I went to see Dr West for my first follow up post op visit. The best part is DRAIN is OUT!!! Omg it feels so much better without that darn drain! I saw the RN first and she was super gentle with removing the drain, I didn't even feel any discomfort, here I thought I would scream from the top of my lungs, just the way some of my patients do at the hospital!! Then I saw the sweet PA, she explained to me what exactly was done to my boobs during surgery. She assisted Dr. West. So to summarize, she told me the previous PS basically cut a hole through my muscles on the side of my breasts ( laterally) stuffed the saline implant shells inside my breasts and filled them up with saline, he did not dissect any muscles any where else as a result my implants were all squished and stuck in one place. So Dr West had to release the muscles at the bottom (towards the breast fold), medially towards my sternum ( breast bones) , he also had to fix the pockets laterally on both sides. The amount of saline placed inside the implants were not labeled correctly either, Dr West and his PA had to cut the saline implants and measure the amount using measuring cups to find out the exact amount. So from my understanding my previous PS basically did everything wrong with creating the pockets and he just stuffed my boobs like you would stuff a turkey. The result was my deformed breasts.
Now I am very pleased with the shape and size of my breasts. Dr West said my implants will drop more to give me the fullness at the bottom, it can take 6 months or more to see the final result. He gave me a bandeau to wear over my boobs to assist the implants move faster. My incisions are also looking good so far. The pain is barely there. So far he is happy with my progress. I just have to be mindful of not over exerting my muscles and refrain from doing too much activities. I have the tendency to do things before my body can handle, I just don't know how to take things easy!!
So far I am a happy girl, I just have to stay positive, infection and CC free, with the grace of good Lord I think I will be alright. Thank you all my RS friends for your kind support and best wishes...:) xoxoxo
Ps: I finally learned how to take a pic from the side and through mirror!! So here what they look like!!! I also added some information about the Natrelle Inspira Implants, thats what I got, Inspira Style SRF 650. I was very naive about silicone implants, I thought it might be helpful to the new RS ladies who are wondering which implant to get!
The fun/first obstacle of having big boobs!!!!
As you know we are all instructed to wear post surgical bra's after our much anticipated surgery and you all know they are very difficult to find. Its also very confusing about the size of the bras we should get. So with the help of my two wonderful RS friends Charm and MDgl5 I found these amazing comfortable and very economical bar's from Walmart. They are the Fruit of the Looms front closure sport bras. Initially I ordered size 40 and 42, I was wearing size 38 pre op but I ordered one size bigger thinking I would be getting bigger implants. Size 42 was loose on me so I kept the size 40 which was also loose and I returned size 42. I found them so comfortable I ordered two extra sets ( each set has two bras) just so that I can wear a fresh bra every single day!! I have an OCD so I washed them all prior to my surgery, all ready to go. Here I was thinking I was so smart!! Surgery was done, as you know I got 650 cc implants. I came home, 48 hours later took a shower and got into my comfy bra's, they were snug but not too tight. Then the next day I developed this horrible itching under my left breast fold. I thought it was my drain. I was taking Benadryl to battle the itching. 5 days later the drain came out and I thought my itching would go away but no, it was still itchy in my breast fold. Then I developed rash as well. Emailed my doctor tonight as I got all worried it might be infection, but he did not think it was infection. He suspected it was my bra which was too tight and irritating my skin. He advised me to take a break from wearing a bra. So here I am, I just ordered another set of bra size 42!!! I think the bra was so tight the edge of the bra was irritating my skin. So hopefully size 42 will fit me well and will not irritate my skin. Lesson learned:
When you get new sets of bigger boobs DO NOT assume your size and Do NOT wash the bra's before trying them on!! I just wasted all
these $$ for all these bras!!! The fun of having big boobs began!!!
The tell of wearing patsies with adhesive when you have derma-bond aka skin glue on your incisions!!
Yesterday I went out and wore those Nippies Skin, silicone pasties with adhesive, after I came home I took them off, then I noticed the derma-bond aka skin glue came off and stuck on the pasties. I was terrified that my incisions which are over a week old would open up. I am a nurse and us, nurses tend to bring medical stuff such as gauge, alcohol swabs etc home in our uniform pockets unknowingly! So luckily I had some steri strips stashed away in my little emergency box, I did not know what else to do, while panicking, I applied some steri strips over my incisions!! Then I emailed my wonderful PS on a late Saturday night asking if It was ok... :( I was also super embarrassed. He replied back to me saying I should be fine, as dressing is needed to be kept only 48 hours, but if I wished I could keep the steri strips on another few days. So ladies lesson learned: If you have derma bond aka skin glue over your incisions, DO NOT use pasties with adhesive!!!
The dreaded Bandeau aka Breast Band!!
Even though this is my revision surgery but since I went for larger implants my PS asked me to wear a bandeau to facilitate my implants to drop faster. Here are some pictures of my fancy bandeau! Last time I wore a white one, it was the most awful contraption to put up with!! This time I was given this black one, the name of this brand is Mermaid. This one is way more comfortable than those traditional white ones. Plus when you wear this black one under a shirt or low neck top it does not look like a strap, it looks like a cami. I tried wearing it both over my skin and over my bra. Its not bad either way. But I prefer to wear it over my bra as I don't get too hot!
Help! Should I have nipple reduction?
Hello Ladies: I need help! I am almost 3 weeks PO, my implants are not quiet settled yet, still wearing the band to make them drop a bit more. My nipples are swollen and sensitive. I am scheduled to have a nipple reduction once I am healed, may be around three months time, as I felt my nipples were too big and sticking out if I did not wear lightly padded bra. Now that my boobs are bigger they don't seem to be too big anymore. Now what do you ladies think? Shall I go ahead with the nipple reduction or just leave my boobs the way they are? My girl friends are telling me to leave them alone, one even said bigger nipples look sexier!! Lolol I have been using patsies when I wear non lined bra's ( those fruit of the looms cotton front open bras) I am also afraid I may loose my sensation to my nipples if I mess with them. Also afraid will they look ugly if they are small considering now I have bigger boobs, also worried about all the hassle of going through recovery again. I know my lefty ( your right ) point towards the corner slightly but do you think its ugly? Then again who will look at my boobs and nipples other than me and my hubby or may be my doctor and the mammogram tech!! Lol Please help!! Any input and advise will be greatly appreciated!! Thank you! Xoxo
The emotional roller coaster
As most of you know I am on my third week after having a revision surgery. This is my 2nd surgery in less than 8 months. I am not sure if any of you who has had repeat surgeries, have gone through the same emotional roller coaster that I am experiencing right now or it is just me who is going insane for no good reason. In other words: Am I the only crazy one here?
I am not feeling the excitement that I felt the first time around. I am constantly worried that something might go wrong with my boobs, I might develop complications again. Like a paranoid individual I am constantly looking at the mirror to make sure they are intact. Also emailing my poor doctor asking him all kinds of stupid questions thinking something is going wrong with my boobs. And yet they look perfectly fine when I look at them, but when I take their pictures they appear crooked. Then I tell myself I am really going crazy!!
I am sick and tired of having to sleep on my back. I get very little sleep at night because of back pain and lack of sleep making me feel irritated during the day. I am also tired of that stupid strap. Yet I am wearing it 24/7 except during shower of course as I feel that if I don't wear the strap the implants will not drop faster and it will only prolong my agony!!
I am a very active person. I am tired of not being able to do the things I enjoy doing such going for a jog, or venturing out for a long hike. I also miss doing my regular workout. Surprisingly I also miss going to work. ( can you believe it?) I am not allowed to lift more than 5 lbs and do vigorous activities and my job requires me to lift over 50 lbs. So I am stuck at home absolutely bored and irritated. But thank God I will be returning to work next week with modified duties.
I am just fed up with this whole waiting process. I just want all this waiting to be over so that I can move on with my life and not think about my boobs anymore! Having two surgeries in one year is sure taking a toll on me both physically and emotionally. This is not fun at all.
The search for two perfect boobs got me to this period of feeling miserable and agony and making me ask myself this question...is it all worth while? I just have to wait and see...:(
One Month Post OP
Just wanted to share some quick pictures before going to work! I came a long way for sure!!
Frustration: Just to vent as no one, in my real life really want to hear about my boobs anymore!
I am just feeling very frustrated as it seems to me the implants are taking forever to drop and fluff. I know it can take up to 6 months and sometime one year for the implants to settle, but its becoming very annoying and I am running out of patience. I am asked to wear that stupid strap for another three weeks, and after three more weeks it will be over 2 months I will be wearing that band for 24/7. I absolutely hate it. I wish the tissue will stretch faster so that my implants will drop into their final destination!! When I wear a t-shirt I look like I have two grapefruit hanging from my chest. They don't look like boobs at all. I am not complaining by no means, I know my boobs will look like boobs one day but this waiting is just getting the best of me.. the weather is getting warmer I cant even hide my grapefruits with a sweater anymore... also that strap makes me feel so hot... am I the only one who is having or had difficulties with the waiting period? Or it is also a part of recovery that all the ladies go through... please implants drop and fluff... please boobs get into the shape faster... :-(
6 weeks Post Op. Do they look like dropping?
Today is 6 weeks post op. I have been wearing the band for over a month now, three more weeks to go, hopefully I will be asked to not to wear that awful contraption anymore. What do you think ladies? Does it look like they dropped a bit more? One picture is taken with camera facing me, and the other is taken with camera directed towards the mirror. They look so different... hmm confusing.
Result of the complaint I filed to the state medical board about my first PS
So remember ladies I filed a formal complaint to the state medical board about my first PS because of the poor treatment I received from him also for how he threatened to sue me for giving him a negative review? So I received a letter from the state medical board. They basically said their "expert investigators" did not find any wrong doing by my ex PS. They also said I developed "Implant malposition" and which is expected for any BA surgery. They did not even bother to address the issue how he has threatened to sue me for writing negative review. So to summarize, this so called regulatory body will only take action if you are practically dying. They don't care that some of these incompetent surgeons with absolutely poor business ethics are butchering our bodies apart, making us disfigured, while taking our money. Lesson learned: be very careful whom you choose. Don't just go by the fancy reviews you read about them, do lots of research, educate your self about the procedure you are about to have, ask questions to the surgeon, request for repeat appointment if you are still unsure, most importantly listen to your hunches. At the end remember its your body and if something goes wrong no one will defend you. Unless you are loaded with money, so that you can retain a lawyer and take legal action.
Some interesting article I read about Breast Implants may cause a rare form of Cancer called Anaplastic large cell lymphoma
Hello ladies it is not my intention to scare you or make you worry about your decision of getting breast implants, however I just wanted to know your opinion or how you feel about the whole notion that breasts implants can cause a rare form of cancer called ALCL or anaplastic large cell lymphoma as stated by FDA yesterday. I read an article by NBC news yesterday where they reported FDA was checking into more than 350 reports linking ALCL with both silicone and saline breasts implants and where they also said FDA reported " All of the information to date suggests that women with breasts implants have a very low but increased risk of developing ALCL compared to women who do not have breasts implants" The report also said " As of February 1, 2017, the FDA has received a total of 359 medical device reports of breasts-implant-associated ALCL, including nine deaths". FDA also added " There are 231 reports that included information on the implant surface. Of these, 203 were reported to be textured implants and 28 reported to be smooth implants."
I was a bit startled by reading this article by NBC news as you know who really wants to hear that her breast implants may increase her chance of getting cancer, but then I thought is there anything in our environment that doesn't increase our chances of getting cancer. Therefor should I be worried or simply panic thinking I may get cancer and I should just go for an explant. After going through two surgeries, spending thousands of $$, do I really want to get rid of my much wanted implants just because of the fear that I MAY get cancer. I really don't know how to take this news or what to think about it. I keep on telling myself I have a higher chance of getting killed by a drunk driver than getting killed by this cancer. I have seen many elderly ladies with implants, they had them for ages, they did not get cancer, their implants are deformed, hard as rock but they are still alive. So what do you ladies think? Shall we be worried or just forget about it and enjoy our boobs.
The Pictures are back!
I deleted all my pictures as I did not want to look at them anymore and be preoccupied with my boobs!! But I am putting them back again because the pictures of the evolution of the boobs of other ladies helped me to console my paranoid mind a great deal that I was going towards the right direction! I am hoping my pictures will do the same, specially to the ladies who are thinking their implants will never drop and their boobs will look crooked forever!!
8 weeks PO today
Just a picture, not much changed!
Need some 2nd opinion for bra selection! Please help!
Ok ladies as you all know I have been complaining about how I was getting all tired of having to wear these Hanes bra's where my boobs bulge out and I get absolutely no comfort. But I have to wear them because if I wear my Fruit of the Looms bra's my nipples protrude out. I tried wearing pasties but after a few hours they tend to press against my sensitive and tender nipples, at the end of the day I see a indentation over my areola from the pasties. I tried cotton round and they still make the mark on my skin. I feel as if though those pasties are suffocating my nipples! So out of frustration I went to the mall looking for a proper fitting bra, even though I know its still early for me to be getting fitted for a bra. So I stopped at Nordstrom and there I was fitted for 32DD. I got these Wacoal bra's, they seem to fit me well in the fitting room but as I was trying them on at home I felt like they were not really giving me the coverage on my boobs. You can see my implants are bulging out on the top like a man boob! Then I went to VS. There the sales lady fitted me for 32DD, when I tried the bra on, it was barely covering my boobs, so she decided to give me 32DDD. I tried 10 different bras on, non of them felt good or looked good on me as again I could see my implants bulging out like a man boob! So I left VS and went to Kohl's. There I tried 10 different bra's. They were either size M or 34D. I could not find one single bra sized 32DD. Mind you all these time I was looking for wire-free bra's as I know my I am not allowed to wear underwire bra yet. Again I see my man boob bulging out. But I got Warner's bra size 34D or M even though the band is way too big and I have to use the last hooks to make it fit well. I am in need of a bra that will not show my nipples and I can wear it when I go to work or out for a long period of time. After wondering around all day and trying out all these bra's I came into this conclusion that I am not ready yet to shop for a bra. It seems to me my implants still have to drop more to give me that fullness at the bottom pole that I am not getting when I try the bra's on. In my vision the cups of the bra should encapsulate the boobs like a mold. Am I right? See I never had big boobs so I am having a hard time with visualizing how the cups should hold the boobs!! I just don't think boobs should be bulging out like a man boob. Or am I mistaking my cleavage with having the man boob? What do you ladies think? Am I right thinking that my boobs are not fitting well inside the cups of the bra? I will keep the Warner's ones as I have to wear something to work but I am thinking of returning the Wacoal ones as they are $60 each. Greatly appreciate your thoughts about my bra sizing dilemma! Thank you!
Unhappy with the way my breasts look . .
23 Apr 2017
2 months post
I have been very busy with school and work, so I could not update recently. I have been feeling pretty down these days. I am not happy the way my breasts look. They look even worse when I take a picture. I feel like they do not have the projection I expected with HP implants. They look saggy and droopy. I did ask all the PS that I consulted prior to my revision if I needed a lift and they all told me I didn't. They just don't look perky at all. I thought my breasts needed to fluff to fill out the lower pole, and it will make my breasts more round and perky. Its close to three months and I am not seeing any improvement. They look big and droopy. I also feel like my right is leaning to one side. I am not sure if its my anatomy, perhaps it is, no one can change that. I am not sure what to do anymore. Shall I live with them or just have an explant? Or shall I wait one year and see how they look? I know I sound like an ungrateful woman who is unhappy even though the breasts look way better than how they were before! If I wear cloths you dont see the asymmetry, but they still look droopy to me. Or this is how I am supposed to look because of the way my body is? I definitely can not afford having repeat surgeries. It takes away too much time from my life, the time I can not afford to loose. All I feel right now is regret, going for a BA is the biggest mistake of my life.
Three months later...
28 Apr 2017
2 months post
Its three months now. I went bra shopping today even though I am fearful that my lefty is not dropping the way it should be. I got the confirmation today that I had more upper fullness on my left breast when I was trying out the bra's at Nordstrom. The bra strap was not laying flat against my skin. I sure hope it will fall in its right place as time goes by. My breasts were never perfectly symmetrical, my right one was smaller than the left. You cant really see the difference in real life. I only notice it in my pictures. I was considering a third surgery to even out my asymmetry, but then I ask myself is it really worth while to put my self through another surgery just to even out the breasts? More surgeries bring more problems. With bras the breasts look fine and even. Anyway I was sized at 32DDD with Wacoal brand. It is very hard to find bra's that are 32DDD. I noticed choices are very limited. I also could not find many wireless bra's. i hope it is ok to wear underwire bras. I just got tired of wearing those front open sports bras!! Anyway Now I wait and see if the left will drop...
The camera serves no justice... few more pictures of my progress!
I have been feeling very frustrated lately with my progress. When I look at my breasts they seem fine to me other than the slight unevenness between my two breasts as my right was always smaller than my left. But when I take pictures they look very distorted. So here are few more pictures that I think represent the current situation of my breasts more accurately than the last one! I got so depressed by looking at my previous pictures I was even thinking about asking my PS to fix the asymmetry!! I felt like my body was rejecting the implants! But the more I look at myself I feel like my breasts look just fine the way they are. If I have no other complications such as CC I think I should just leave them alone. They look way better than how they were before my revision for sure. I think my PS did an amazing job with reconstructing my breasts considering how distorted they became after the awful work done by my previous PS. I feel that I may be asking for more trouble by wanting more symmetrical breasts and going for more unnecessary surgeries. They look perfect when I wear the proper fitting bra's. I love the size, 650 seem really huge but I am able to carry them as I am a tall lady with broad shoulder. No one even notices that I had BA! They look very natural under my cloths while giving me the feminine silhouette that I was hoping to achieve. I am sure the shape will change even more as times go by. I am only three months PO, I have read breasts shape can evolve up to one year. So what do you think ladies? Are they a keeper? :-)
Few pictures with a bra on!!
So here are few pictures with a bra on! Sorry ladies I am a very simple basic person! I went bra shopping but I only got the basic bra's that I need, nothing sexy or fancy!! Lol I got two bra's from Nordstrom. They are Wacoal 32 DDD! The one I am wearing is a Wacoal 32 DDD. I got two bra's, one is black and the other is beige!! I also went to VS, and there I also got two bras, 32 DDD, again black and beige!! Lololol I find the Wacoal is more comfortable than the VS bra's. The VS bra's can be seen through my body hugging T-shirt, whereas the Wacoal bra's blend against my skin, you cant even see I am wearing a bra. But I must say these bra's are expensive. I was not going to spend whole lot of money for bra's until I am 100 sure I will not be needing a revision. I think three months PO is too early to buy loads of expensive bras. You just never know what may happen the next few months as our breasts can change shapes as implants continue to settle in the pockets. Also another point to remember is that finding a DDD bra with 32 band size is extremely difficult. I could not find 32 DDD at any Kohl's, JC penny, or even Macy's. I found them Macy's on line, but mostly at VS and Nordstrom. I haven't been to Soma yet, they may have 32DDD or the size that fits me. I tried 34 band but its way too loose for me. I am also having hard time getting used to the underwire bra's. I feel discomfort when the bra cups push against my boobs, I haven't worn an underwire bra almost over an year now, since my first surgery, so they feel uncomfortable. I am just hoping its a mater of getting used to them again not something terribly bad such as CC. Mind you my nipples are still very tender and thats may be the contributing factor towards my discomfort as well. But once I feel comfortable with my newly added beauties I will go bra shopping again and I promise you I will stay away from the color beige and black!! Lol
The nightmare of bra shopping!
24 May 2017
3 months post
So as you know I have been looking for that perfect bra that is comfortable and yet elegant. I have been to Nordstrom many times. Many PS here advised real selfers that Nordstrom has professional bra fitters whom know how to fit you with a proper fitting bra. Which is true. Every time I visited Nordstrom I saw ladies were getting fitted for bra's with prosthesis. I imagine they were the victims of evil breast cancer. The lady who fitted me the very first time was very nice and she taught me how to put on bra properly. I never had big boobs so I always wore those heavily padded add a cup bras and never knew there was a technique when you put your bra on! You cant just put the bra on you have to bend forward and put your boobs inside the cups and then stand up!! So I completely trust what the ladies at Nordstrom do. They are way better than the ladies at VS for sure! The nice lady at Nordstrom initially fitted me with 32DD, but when I tried the bra on I felt super uncomfortable, I felt like my boobs were spilling out and I was not sure if it was because my implants were still riding high. But I voiced my concern and then she let me try on 32DDD. She said that was perfect and I also felt very comfortable.
But weeks later I still felt very uncomfortable when I wore my wacoal 32 DDD bra's. Then again I thought it was because I was still healing or may be the hypersensitivity of my nipples was giving me the nerve pain and it was not the bra. But things got worse yesterday. I was at work, I had such a achy pain on my boobs I felt like my boobs were about to pop out of my chest cavity! I was so uncomfortable I called my hubby and made him drive 20 min to deliver me my cotton fruit of the looms bras along with my pasties!! Which he did and I felt such a relieve when I took the wacoal bra off and it felt like as if though a gigantic elephant was just got off my chest!! I knew right then it was my stupid bra that was giving me pain, it was too tight and quashing my boobs! So this morning I went back to Nordstrom and told the lady I was having pain when I wore those bra's. She took me back to the fitting room and gave me wacoal 32G ( 32DDDD) to try on. They felt very comfortable, she said they were fitting me perfect.
But my question is how did my size change within a month? Did they measure me wrong the first time or its because the implants drop more so the fitting was different? So the lesson that I learned from my experience is that DO NOT go for a formal bra shopping until your implants are completely down otherwise you will be spending a lot of money buying these expensive bras that may not fit you later. The PS here are right that we need to be patience and buy cheap bra's few at a times until all the settling is done.
Also another point to remember the larger the breasts you have the more difficult it is to find a proper fitting bra. Your choices become very limited and plain simple boring. They also cost you more. I also noticed when you have super big breasts not all cloths look flattering on you. Specially if you have broader shoulders with slender waists. I don't have slender waist and but I know some cloths make me look top heavy and matronly. My new 32 G bras look so ugly. The bigger the cup the size the wider the band, so the bras look like granny bra's :-(
Some of the ladies who knew I had a boob job kept on telling me I looked small. So I was going crazy if I should go for bigger implants. I even asked my PS of my possibility of going bigger since I already have 650 cc in me! I really don't look like I have G cups boobs. But now with all the difficulties that I am facing with getting a proper fitting bra, I really don't think I want any bigger boobs than what I have right now. I really don't care if I my boobs look small, and I don't look like a lady who had a boob job, I think this is more than what I can handle.
The reason for me ranting on and on is to remind you ladies just think twice before you ask for bigger boobs! Bigger boobs bring many issues!! Just remember majority of our female population do not have big breast so the bra manufacturers do not produce that many large size bra's! Also never rush into buying expensive bra's until you are completely healed otherwise you will be wasting your money the way I did. Also do not ask for bigger boobs just because "the other ladies" do not think your boobs look big enough. Look at your pros and the cons and then decide if thats what you really want! Bigger boobs=bigger problems!
I am beginning to love my boobies!
29 May 2017
3 months post
Just wanted to share some pictures with bras and a top, that I could never imagine wearing when I had no boobies! It sure was a roller coaster ride for me. There were days when I absolutely hated my look, then there were days I liked the way I looked. There were days I was very critical of every single point of my boobs then there were days they seemed just perfect to me. I think it just takes time to get used to the new body image. I love how they look now, not sure if they will change anymore. I think they look very natural and do not look like two balloons protruding out of my chest!
Some of the ladies tell me I look small, then I wonder if I should have gone a bit more bigger! May be 750 cc? Am I getting the boob greed again? Lol
Well now I just have to keep my fingers crossed so that the lefty gets softer. Its still firm and if it doesn't soften up not sure what I will do.. so ladies who are feeling the blues and going crazy over analyzing every aspects of your boobs, don't worry, things do get better, you do learn to love and appreciate your boobs! For now just follow the instruction from your PS and be patience! There is a light at the end of the tunnel and its true!! Happy healing..:-)
5 months post op... Having love and hate relationship with my boobs.
22 Jun 2017
4 months post
Am I going crazy? One day I like my boobs and the next day I hate them. They haven't changed a bit. Now I see and feel rippling on my both breasts. They still feel firm. Look like balloons. I get embarrassed to hug my friends and family because I feel like they would know I had a boob job as my boobs feel so fake and firm. Is this how the augmented boobs supposed to feel? Do they ever get softer and feel natural? Another issue I am having is finding a proper bathing suit. They don't look very flattering anymore. When I wear a bikini top or a tankini my breasts look like two balls. Not sure what to think of my boobs anymore. Is this natural? Or am I being too critical and wanting something that Is not attainable and this is as good as gonna get... and I should just live with them??