OMG. Surgery Tomorrow Was Cancelled Today by Surgeon - What Now!??! - Salt Lake City, UT

Wow. What a crazy, strange, sad day. But let me...

Wow. What a crazy, strange, sad day. But let me start at the beginning. I have been considering this procedure for almost a year. I had really severe sinus troubles that led me to surgery on my sinuses and a septoplasty. I had that surgery in February. Leading up to it I was strongly considering having a rhinoplasty at the same time. I had two consultations but was talked out of it by my husband, and the doc I really wanted to perform the sinus portion convinced me that my entire claim might be denied if I had a cosmetic part done. At the time it was really a medical necessity so despite really wanting to correct my nose's look - I went through with just the internal part. Afterwards I could breathe great and felt healthy, but I immediately regretted not doing the rhinoplasty. I really fixated on it until I decided it was something I HAD to do.

All my life I have been aware of my nose. My Dad has really big nostrils and constantly pointed out that I had his nose, which I hated. Of course I heard it from other kids all through school, and even my best friend and brother have made comments that really stuck with me. For a while I didn't think of it but once I was pregnant my nose really swelled up and I didn't want any pics taken of me, even holding my beautiful newborn daughter. I have noticed I am very conscious of it when smiling, since that is when it is widest, so I find myself not wanting to smile or laugh fully - which c'mon, how can I live life to the fullest if I can't smile wide and feel great?!

At the same time in some ways maybe my nose is not THAT bad. I do feel attractive and grateful for what I have. That is why its been a terribly hard decision. The work I want done is so subtle - very slight narrowing of alar base and tip, and maybe a very slight shave of bump on bridge. I have definitely been worried about it being too much, not looking like myself, taking away character etc. From the start it was so stressful to consider elective surgery and going under anesthesia, which makes me really sick, when I do have a beautiful life.

So despite my MAJOR hesitations about plastic surgery, my total shame in not wanting to be judged, I started researching surgeons. I live in a beautiful place but with limited options so I decided on Dr. Mobley in Salt Lake City, UT. He was recommended by the doc who did my sinus surgery and despite it being a 6 hour drive it seemed like he was the best choice. We had two or three phone consultations, several emails with pictures, and decided to arrange my consult for today August 13th, and the Surgery tomorrow, August 14th.

This was MONTHS ago. I have spent the summer preparing. Despite our desire to have another baby we have postponed that until after the surgery, which we hoped to do earlier, but couldn't get in until August. My husband had to take time off to care for our now almost 3 year old daughter, since I stay home with her full time. I have ridden a roller coaster of emotions, had major anxieties, got over them, and have been in the mode of full on preparation (no drinking, eating super healthy, taking supplements etc). I have rearranged schedules, booked hotel rooms, planned activites for my husband and daughter to do while I am recovering. All of our bags were packed to leave at 6 a.m. today.

Then yesterday, I was getting a massage in the late afternoon to relax for the events ahead, and I received a phone call just as I was about to lie down. It was the surgeon's scheduler saying that the surgeon was really sick and there was a 50/50 chance he could do my surgery Weds. All sorts of thoughts ran through my mind. How would I know if I should leave? I didn't exactly want to drag my family to SLC if I didn't need to. And then of course the reality that NO - I cannot reschedule!! This is the time we have prepared for, and even next week my husband would have to get back to work, I do not have family close to help me, nor am I telling them about all this etc.

At that point the scheduler agreed to call me first thing in the morning with a report of how the Dr. was doing. Well of course last night was extremely nerve-wracking. My bags were packed, but I had no idea if we were going or what would happen. So this morning he calls and says the Dr. is still sick and will not be able to do any surgeries this week at all. Do I mention that there was no apology, no offering of other options? Insane. I understand being sick may be beyond the surgeons control, but they handled it in a way that I felt extremely unimportant! So I asked if there was anything next week could possibly work, and we would make it work on my end. At this point I could not, still can not imagine backing out completely. He said he would get back to me within the hour. Three hours later, he called with the news, he has nothing until August 26th, the day must husband returns to grad school. Again no apology, just an "alrighty, I'll refund your money".

Now I don't know how to move forward. Clearly I've decided this is important to me. But I feel like my hands are tied. I really cannot reschedule, find another doc, take more time off, postpone having another baby when that is something I wanted to do a year ago etc.

If anyone has any suggestions for how not to think about my nose please let me know. I am a healthy, proactive person and despite my dissapointment I know I am strong and will be ok. Am just in a state of disbelief now.

Thanks for listening to this long story.

I am reluctant to post photos because I'd really like to be anonymous but I think its a key part of the story so here goes!

Surgery Cancelled... update

Thank you so much to those who have left comments. It has really helped me get through the week. I love this site! And wanted to update. So after the surgery was cancelled I was still quite upset about how it was handled, and I did write the surgeon to tell him so. I let him know how huge of a deal it was for my family to have prepared and what an emotional journey I was on, and how incomprehensible it was that the person who called to cancel did not really even TRY to get me rescheduled, let alone sound as if any of it mattered. I told him that regardless of whether they could do anything about it now, they should know what I have gone through and should not take it lightly.
Well however understanding the surgeon aimed to seem in his response (the word political comes to mind), his promise that they would contact me about re-scheduling next week remains unfulfilled - they did not call me back at all last week. He said he would have his scheduler call me, that they would try to find a way to get me in next week. I responded that I would be waiting for that call. And nothing. Do they really think they could call Monday and have me come to Salt Lake the next day or something? This is surgery, serious business! Am I to further put my life on hold in case they call? Surely if there was a way to make it work next week OR not, they could have advised me rather then leaving me hanging all weekend.
As for why I haven't called myself I say let them prove their point, because if they are really the type to handle it this way then do I really want them operating on me?! No.
So as of now, ahhh. I am trying to handle it all, and I'm doing better than I thought but it still bothers me. I am trying to move on and let go of the grip my obsession with my nose has had on me, by focusing on all the good things I am grateful for. I think at this point I am really dealing with some anger at the "injustice" of it all, maybe even more than the fact that now I live with my nose. I simply do not feel I was treated well by this surgeons office at all.
To all those who have said I do not need the surgery I am so glad to hear those words. I am also tempted to post more pics because there are certainly worse that really show the width and bumpiness. But for now I guess since my goal is moving on there is no point in convincing you all how bad it can be. Thanks for listening.
Dr. Steven Mobley

I will definitely complete this portion soon. I think others considering him should know how i was treated. To be continued...

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Wow, you are stunningly beautiful. I don't even think you need a nose job! Then again, I understand that tug at the back of your mind that says, "but it could be even better...". I think everything happens for a reason and like you said, do you really want someone so careless changing your face? I wouldn't. I think you should keep searching for a surgeon. I also am interested in rhinoplasty and I think I might make a nice vacay out of it. Maybe you should take the fam to Disney World where you have many more PS options and they can have plenty of activities to keep them busy. Then, if your new PS cancels on you it will just turn into a fun family getaway. PS, if a surgeon cancels on you again I would take that as a sign.. haha
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I'm so sorry to hear about your story. I would feel very frustrated and disappointed as it can be such an emotional process. I think you seem to be handling it in a very positive way. I have to say I think you have a really nice nose. Wishing you the best of luck in the future!
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My dear, you are gorgeous! I hope you get the refinement you are looking for some day and that you can find a better environment where you, the patient, feel completely considered and cared for. You deserve to be informed at all times and to have people made available to you through this tolling process. I think this may be quite a telling sign of the kind of aftercare you could expect from his business. What else does he expect gou to have to go on? Good luck, and take all the time you need to figure it out! No rushing :)
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You're beautiful! I know it is disappointing to have all this happen to you, maybe it is a blessing in disguise. Maybe somethin awful would have happened if u went thru w the surgery. I know I can't convince u, but I do not think u need rhinoplasty. You don't have a deformed nasal shape. I would say go without the surgery !
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YUCK!!! I'm sure you are not the only person who has had their surgery cancelled on them due to a surgeons illness. So hopefully that fact will comfort you... you are absolutely right that the surgeon's scheduler should have apologized and at least tried to work with you!! I had my surgery Monday because hubs was off this week and his last semester of grad school is 8/26 so we were on a time crunch too. Did you express that to the scheduler?? Looking at your pics however, I don't think your nose is really too bad!!! I say don't hold off on your life for this if you feel that having another baby is more important than your nose job, just know the nose job can wait :) Good luck!!
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I too had my surgery rescheduled because..get this..the skin around my nose decided to break out right before the big day (I was on a tight schedule like you so I cancelled). So in some way I can understand how let down you must feel. But it only makes me feel happy that there are other people going through the same thing :)! Hope you stay strong and I hope you get another opportunity to have the surgery.
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Sorry to hear about your story. I know I'd be incredibly disappointed if I was in your shoes. It stinks to be mentally, emotionally and physically prepared (not to mention making arrangements for child care and your husband!) and have the rug pulled out. I know you must have your heart set on rhinoplasty, considering you were so close to having it done, but I feel like I have to say it........you're gorgeous and I don't think you need it! I swear, I think it was divine intervention! I bet that more people than you realize in your life admire your looks!
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You look beautiful. Hope the best for you
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Oh, wow! What a blow. I know how much it takes to make arrangements when you have a child and all the psychological work up it takes to get to that place. Now, I'm not a super spiritual person, but maybe surgery being canceled is some sort of sign. As a completely objective onlooker, I think your nose is amazing as is. Your features are very balanced from the front and the side and you're a beautiful lady.

That said, I can imagine how disappointed you must feel right now. Do you think you'll try to reschedule or move on with baby plans?

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Funny you say that. I have definitely considered the "sign" aspect of it getting cancelled, and looking at it that way may help me to move on , so that I can see it as not meant to be. I ended up emailing the surgeon himself (he may regret giving me his email!) and letting him know how disappointed I was, especially that they did not seem to feel obligated to find a time that would work for me. He responded very professionally, was apologetic, and said they would still try to make something work for me. But now I am wondering if its "not meant to be" if I should even force it. Sigh. Another consideration is that since I am planning another pregnancy and my nose seemed to enlarge with the last one, that maybe I should wait until its swelled and settled again to correct it. Just kinda painful to imagine going through all this again in a year or so and recovering with two kids vs. one. (or 3 - twins run strongly in my family!!)
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p.s. thank you for your opinion and compliments, it does really help to have others weigh in at this point!
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Recovering with another would be harder, but do-able. I've been through the recovery (twice) and after the first three days could definitely see doing some light child care. Maybe a temporary nanny would be in order. :)

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