10 Months Post-Op - Vancouver, BC

Hey peeps. So last week marked 10 months since my initial surgery; I had made the plans to have a revision on February 18th, but finances got in the way and so I had to postpone it (right now I tentatively said until May, but we'll see what happens, as it all depends on the money situation). I don't really know how to describe how I feel about my nose in the last couple of months; I tend not to think about it as much, although I still find myself feeling the tip on a daily basis to see what the size of it is (it still fluctuates throughout the day, based on the weather, how tired I am, etc.). For example, I just felt it and right now it's got a bit of swelling - not a ton, but it's not it's smallest size, which I can by now tell by feeling it. When it's at its smallest size, there is a notable difference, and I can even pinch the skin of the tip a bit.

I find that I like my nose a lot more in the last few months, when I compare it to my old nose. But there are still moments (that admittedly happen on a daily to bi-daily basis) where I still really don't like it. Same things as before; wish my tip was more raised, and that I didn't have that half inverted V on the left side of my bridge. Obviously it's noticeable when I smile (it's most noticeable in person), but when I turn my head to the left and it's anything other than looking straight at the person, you can actually see where I'm missing cartilage. It's kind of weird. Sometimes, I see it and I feel like I'm okay with it. Other times, I hate it and I want it gone. I'm still going over my options though, and trying to consider both the pros and the cons to a revision. I have a follow-up appointment with Dr. B in two months, and I'm sure after we discuss it all and he does up some morphed visuals to try and give me an idea of what it could look like (specifically, how much wider my bridge would be if I got the spreader graft), I think I'll have a better idea of whether I want to go through with it, or just resign myself to never being completely happy with my nose.

Trust me, though, I'm not as depressed about it as this review sounds, lol. I would LIKE these things to be fixed and to not run into anymore problems, but the truth is, if I HAVE to, I can live with my nose now. It's not like I can't look into the mirror anymore, or don't still think I'm pretty, or cry myself to sleep over it, because none of that is the case. There are just certain angles that I despise in photos, and some days when I smile in the mirror, I hate seeing that indent and that ugly line; some days, I look at my profiles and really love them, while others, I hate how big they still look and miss my cute upturned tip. But there are also days where I like how it looks and no matter what, I am ALWAYS grateful for my nose when I look at before photos lol

Anyways, I posted pics - keep in mind that I made a point to only post the most flattering ones lol Except for the two photos where I'm holding the baby; I DID want to show what I meant about how the half-inverted V affects my smile, both from head-on and from the partial angle. The rest of the photos, though, I deliberately picked nice ones because I didn't feel like dwelling on the bad photos; just know that, sadly, it doesn't look that nice all the time in real life. If I make any facial expression, it looks like how it does in the photos where I'm holding the baby.

I don't know if anyone even reads this review anymore, lol. I guess I just needed to get it out. I had a phone chat with Dr. B last night, as I'd emailed his receptionist with a bunch of photos of my nose, expresses my concerns, and voicing my desire for a revision. Dr. B was very kind about it all, but the news I was told wasn't exactly ideal; I have an inverted V deformity on the left side of my nose (luckily not the right either), which can be corrected by a revision. He mentioned something called a spreader graft and cartilage taken from my septum to try and fix it, but the bad news is that he said it makes the nose appear wider by about 2mm and he estimates it can only mask the cosmetic look of the V by about 60%. I did say that 60% is 60% better than what it looks like now, but it's still kind of disheartening considering that I've seen before and after pics of patients who've had spreader grafts to fix full inverted Vs, and they looked almost 100% unnoticeable. So I'm wondering if mine will look as good as theirs, and if not, why not? Mine isn't a full inverted V.. I also forgot to mention this to him but I'd like to see if he can rasp the bony bump on the left of my upper bridge that was caused by the osteotomy, since it is in fact bone and probably won't decrease in size much more by this point.

He also mentioned that it appears I've formed scar tissue right at the top of my tip, which is why it looks more fat and balloony. He also agreed that it had definitely dropped, and listened to my thoughts that I didn't prefer it that low and wanted it raised again to be like how it looked in my 10-day post op pics.

He said that, had I not needed anything else other than to get rid of the scar tissue on my tip, he'd just recommend a steroid injection, but since I have the inverted V (which he said wouldn't go away on its own without surgery), I can have a revision and he would also use that opportunity to try fixing my tip.

I won't be physically seeing him until about January, but I can go ahead and call Mandy to book a revision surgery for the end of February (as that will be one year since my initial surgery). He would only be charging me the surgical facility fees, along with the additional charge to go under general anesthesia this time instead of twilight - at my request, since this surgery would be about 2-3 hours and I don't want to be awake during that.

I'm disappointed that there's a chance my nose can still show this stupid half inverted V, even after a revision. I'm also worried about how much wider the graft is going to make my nose appear, and if it'll change the overall appearance of my face. My original nose was a bit wider, and I didn't so much mind that, so as long as it would be no wider than my original nose, I can live with that - but the thought of going back to having a wider-looking nose, only to go in with the HOPE that it'll fix the look of the inverted V by 60% is scary. I'm wondering if I should try consulting with any other surgeons to get their opinion on the matter. I've been reading a lot into Dr. Vladimir Grigoryants, who works in Glendale, California. The only downside is that I live in Canada, so I'd need to spend about $500 just to travel down there for a face-to-face consultation. I may try sending his office an email with photos, to see what he says from initially looking at my nose.

I'm also worried that, even after getting rid of the scar tissue in my tip, if it'll just come back again - or come back again worse, which would really suck. I'm worried this will make my nose look worse and I will end up with a really ugly looking nose. But I know I hate the inverted V and really don't want to have that for the rest of my life.

Bleh, this sucks.

So, my review is no longer linked to Dr. B's page on here (although Part 1 of my review still is), and now I'm confused and a little concerned..

Anyways, umm, I have a phone appointment with Dr. B next week, as I sent off an email with a bunch of pictures to Katie last week, voicing my decision to get a revision. Since the photos were thorough in pointing out my issues, I don't need to come in to see him. We'll have a phone discussion instead, and then I'll see him in person in February. I'm hoping we can come to a consensus of what's going to happen, sooner rather than later (if he has no intention of performing a revision, I'd like to know as soon as possible). I'm keeping my fingers crossed because I really like him as a surgeon and, as I said, I don't want to go to anything else. I know he can fix what I want changed slightly.

Anyways, these photos may be COMPLETELY overdone, but I downloaded the Plastic Surgery App thing.. and played around with a couple of pictures. I like the way they looked edited, but that may be too much to ask for in a revision lol I'd just be happy having it look like it did when I was 10 days post-op, with the pixie upturned tip, only smaller and less bulbous, and without the bump on the left side of my bridge. But let me know what you think, just for fun?