Tired Of Stealing Handicapped Parking Spaces...I'm Not Handicap...lol - Tijuana Mexico

So I've gained a huge amount of weight!!! My...

So I've gained a huge amount of weight!!! My father passed in 2007, a man of which was my mother and father, yeah, I am his only child and we were very close. After his death, I just mourned and ate, ate and mourned. This year I have gotten sooooo much better. I had lost faith in God, self, and others, and was a complete B*tch to everyone that crossed my path, yes I know this. I want so badly to be myself again, you know, loving life and all things in it, INCLUDING MYSELF.......Life has not been so positive these days, everything has been a blur, and I've sick of being this angry Beast...lol....I can laugh about it now, but when I say has been ugly.....it has been ugly...Anyhow, this surgery is getting so much negative feedback from my husband and loved ones, but I'm ready to jump into Right Now...I think........I am so ready for this procedure that I have been envisioning myself slim Again and on the basketball court whipping some guys butt...I've always saw myself as sexy, beautiful, or anything else women feel or desire, I never lost that part of me, even at this size...but I'm not ME, I'm not completely HAPPY with the ME that YOU see.....I want to walk or hmmmmmm, maybe run a flight of stairs...lol...without feeling like I'm about to pass out. I want get out of my car maybe 10 parking spaces away from the stores entrance, and stop stealing handicapped parking spaces...yes, bad me...lol.....i want to be able to put on my freaking seatbelt without feeling like i have on a straight jacket....lol....I want to wear heels again, with feeling like BAMBi, or a baby learning to walk....lol...I'm silly too, as you can see, but wish me the best if you will and share your thoughts about my post please....PEACE

NEGATIVE VIBES!!

SO, I'VE TOLD A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS AND I'M SORT OF FEELING NERVOUS ABOUT THIS PROCEDURE. IT SEEMS EVERYONE HAS SOMETHING "NEGATIVE" TO SAY. YOU'RE GONNA DIE, YOU'RE GOING ABOUT IT THE LAZY WAY...SIGHHHHS..I FEEL SO STRESSED, AND DEPRESSED. I WANT SO BADLY TO LIVE AGAIN. MY FATHER'S DEATH MADE ME HIDE AWAY FROM LIFE AND PPL LIKE A TURTLE IN A SHELL. FOR 8 YEARS THERE HAS BEEN NOTHING BUT SADNESS AND GRIEF, BUT TODAY, AFTER PRAYING AND CRYING IT ALL OUT, I HAVE FELT THIS LIFT, THIS WEIGHT LIFTED OFF OF MY SHOULDERS...I'M READY TO LIVE..I WANT TO LIVE!!
Mexico Bariatric Surgeon

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