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POSTED UNDER Rhinoplasty REVIEWS

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ORIGINAL POST

Growing up, my brothers and i got abused in every...

Matilda24

Growing up, my brothers and i got abused in every way possible by our mom. They had worse beatings than i did but she broke my nose when i was extremely young. Only as i reached my teens, i began to notice that whenever i blew or rubbed my nose, sometimes even if i washed my face a bit too enthusiastically, it would crunch and i'd be left in quite a bit of pain. Eventually, i noticed my nose had two huge bumps on either side and bent to the side.

It look me a long time to get over my past but i got there in the end. i no longer speak to any of my family but one thing that leaves a negative reminder is my nose. Every time i knock it i get angry and sad and relive everything all over again.

I desperately want rhinoplasty and my breathing is mildly affected, but i have absolutely no way of paying or it yet or the foreseeable future. I am working on a few things which i hope will help and prevent me from seeing my mother's face when i look in the mirror.

I guess i just wanted to say hello and vent a little. Thank you for taking the time to read my post and wish me luck finding one of the few (that i seem to be able to find, at least) decent rhinoplasty specialists in England. It will happen, it has to, it's just a matter of time.

Replies (3)

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February 4, 2013

Thanks so much for sharing on RealSelf! I'm truly sorry for what you went through as a child. My heart just aches for you.

I hope you're able to figure out financing. You might be surprised and insurance might cover at least part of the surgery if you have breathing issues or pain. Not sure how health care works over there, but it'd be worth a try to call a few surgeons and ask.

Here's a list of questions to ask prospective doctors. Please keep us posted. I hope you're able to get this taken care of so you only see YOU when you look in the mirror.

February 5, 2013
Thank you, that's so nice! I will have a look right away. Health care over here is rubbish, mostly. NHS could possibly cover the cost seeing as it's not just cosmetic but i doubt it would be a specialist, or that it would include after care. Plus i want to do this on m own. Thank you again, i will certainly update as soon as something happens!
June 29, 2017
Hi I came across ur story. I read it and wanted to know how u r. I also read the fact u wrote this in year 2013. Hopefully u will see this somehow :)
UPDATED FROM Matilda24

Just wanted to thank everyone for leaving me such...

Matilda24
Just wanted to thank everyone for leaving me such supportive messages. My fiance has only just come around to the idea of me getting my nose fixed and i've never had anyone else support me and be so kind, so it means the world to me that people who don't even know me are being so friendly and supportive. Thank you, sincerely.

Also thank you to everyone who has shared their stories and reviews. With every one i read i am feeling more and more determined and positive and assured that i am doing the right thing. Good luck to anyone who is going ahead with rhinoplasty and i hope you get the result you are looking for.

Replies (12)

February 5, 2013
Hello and welcome. I am so sorry for what you went through as a child, and wish you complete healing on every level. All the very best planning surgery to correct the bend & bumps. Take care & stay in touch.
March 12, 2013
Thank you! And i'm so pleased for you too, you've had such a great result! Apologies for the late reply
February 5, 2013
my heart breaks when I read your story ... but I feel that you have grown a strong person and know to leave the bad experience behind ... best wishes for good healing and a happy future.
February 5, 2013
I mean ... grown up
February 5, 2013
It so great that you have overcome your past and moved for ward and can understand why you would want to complete the journey with your rhinoplasty! Like you say it's just a matter of time and something to look forward to!
February 5, 2013
There are a number of programs that offer financial assistance for abuse victims who need surgery. Google "plastic surgery help for abuse victims" to see the list. Good luck!
February 5, 2013
Thank you! i did as you suggested but, unfortunately, they all seem to be in the US. The only article i could find similar for the UK was an independent surgeon performing free reconstructive surgery for survivors of acid attacks. My situation is nowhere near as significant as that so i guess i can wait. But it's good, sometimes i do need a little reality check like this so i can appreciate that it's not the end of the world and what i'm going through pales in significance compared to what others have to put up with every day. But thank you again, i appreciate your post, sincerely.
February 5, 2013
I have just realised also that i was reading your review as you commented! Your new nose looks amazing and i hope others are starting to come around to your decision. Also your baby boy is absolutely gorgeous :)
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February 5, 2013
You're a very strong and brave woman to have gone through what you have and to come out the way you have. I also grew up in an abusive household (though my dad and I are much closer now), and although I never experienced it to the physical extent that you did, I can understand in terms of how it is an emotional impact. Good luck on your journey and just know that you always have us here at realself to offer support.
March 12, 2013
Thank you, that means a lot. I still can't believe how kind most people are on here. I'm sorry for what you went through too, but you give me a lot of hope after reading your review and seeing your perfect result! Whoa, late reply, sorry
UPDATED FROM Matilda24

So recently i have been emailing...

Matilda24
So recently i have been emailing cosmetic/reconstructive surgeons. i contacted MYA but they seem kinda...... pushy. I'm not keen on anyone who is perfectly fine emailing me and calling me ten times a day (that is only a very slight exaggeration), they might as well put a gun to my head and pinch my purse. I didn't get a straight answer on if any of their surgeons are rhinoplasty specialists, so i'm guessing they're all a jack of all trades.

One specialist sounded great, a Muhammad Riaz, but i can't see any reviews or anything for him anywhere. A few others just haven't impressed me. i think it's important to maybe find a surgeon who charges for a consultation, that way you know he doesn't want to waste time on people who are just curious, or half-arsed.

i still don't have the money for my surgery yet, but i do have something i'm putting a lot of faith in...

i'm in a really horrible position right now and i'm just thankful we have a punch bag in the garden! I'm trying not to let myself get upset at the thought i make right what someone else did to me. i'm trying not to let feelings get in the way, 'why should i have to live with this, she shouldn't have done it', etc. My fella is being so patient and supportive, i'm thankful for him every day!

i just can't wait to talk to someone and not have to turn my head to the side like a pigeon! I have ruined so many important photos with my nose, the birth of my little girl, our holidays etc. I don't want to ruin our wedding photos too. i also can't wait to be able to sneeze out of my nose without practically crying after, and rubbing my nose, blowing it, washing my face carelessly....! It's spurring me on and getting me pumped up but i have to work to earn the money, and it's hard when my fella works 14hr shifts, i have a 22 month old and no family to help.

Anyway, im trying not to post until i have made some progress, it's just hard because of how passionately i feel about this. I think i may have a go on my punch bag.... i may picture my mother's nose as i do! I must note, i am completely against violence and mean it light heartedly. But hey, it's the least she deserves for doing that to a 3 or 4 year old and a little fantasy never hurt anyone.

Thanks again for all your support and kind words, it really does mean a lot. Good luck to you all

PS I kind of feel a bit mean by remaining completely anonymous so i have decided to post full pictures now, like i won't do a 'Manhunter' on my eyes any more.

Replies (8)

February 18, 2013
Grrr! Three times i tried uploading more photos and three times it's buggered up! Will try again later
February 18, 2013
It's actually pretty cute as it is, but I can understand your frustration. Hang in there, and you can make this happen if you really want. Also, visit lookyourbestuk.com if you haven't already for European PS reviews.
March 12, 2013
Thank you, i will! :)
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February 23, 2013
I used to do the "turn to the right" thing too haha.. I would always rearrange group pictures to capture my good side, my wedding video happened to be shot from my bad side and I couldn't stand watching it, I didn't want to show anyone! If anyone deserves a break, it's you darling, keep putting in good positive hopeful vibes into the universe and hang in there, it's coming!! You are beautiful no matter what, and you certainly deserve to be happy :)
March 12, 2013
Ha, yeah, that's what i'm worried about. All the important photos (daughter's birth, highs etc) seem to be ruined by being taken by my right side or face-on, i want to make sure my wedding pics look the best they can. Thank you for your lovely words, they mean a lot. Hope you're still loving that perfect little nose of yours!
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February 28, 2013
I'm sorry to hear about what happened to you as a child. The important thing is to look ahead and not back. Make sure you consult with several doctors to see which one seems best with rhinoplasty. If they don't have before and afters on their site, you could probably ask them at the consultation and they'll probably show them to you (that's what I did). Good luck finding a surgeon!
March 12, 2013
Thank you! I loved reading your review, by the way. Hope you're really pleased with your results, you look gorgeous!
August 3, 2016
I have just used Dr Riaz , he is fantastically good . Quiet and very kind and he and his team are very professional , he is super -skilled .