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SUPER DEPRESSED

Hey guys, Thought I would give you an update. I am now 27. I have had to go through my entire 20s with a bad nose job. Don't get me wrong, it doesn't look deformed or necessarily botched like some nightmare cases. Nevertheless, its very crooked, my nostrils are pointed, and my tip is underprojected. Also, looks different on two sides. I have an all around look of asymmetry to my face. To top it off, last month, I got into an argument with my mother and she called my face ugly and said I have a crooked nose. I'm crying a lot now as I type. I've always been so insecure, but being called ugly by my mother was really painful. I've dealt with a lot the past few years. A very painful breakup, disappointing adventures in dating after breakups, falling outs with many family members, and professional failures... My mother apologized for what she said, but I believe there is a hint of truth to the things people say when they are angry. Anyhow, I'm sorry to all the people who commented and messaged me that I didn't respond to immediately. I've just been super down. Please inbox me and I hope we can chat more. I could use some friends and support now. I have none at the moment. If you are in Chicago, all the better. Maybe we can even actually meet IRL or start some sort of support group for people with rhinoplasty. BTW, I'm seriously considering a revision now. I want to do it before I'm 30, so I can at least live out the last years of my 20s with some happiness and confidence.

Only people who have been through rhinoplasty understand

For 3 years, I put rhinoplasty thoughts on the back burner. Its not the end of a relationship that made me question my looks, but I want to look my best to start a new life. Sometimes I question if the bad nose job was the reason I got involved with this loser ex 3 years ago and suckered into his world. Whatever the case, this surgery left me with awful results and deformities which include a hard piece of cartilage (not a graft, but my actual nose cartilage) in a hard ball on the side of my nose, near my eye. Thankfully, my thick skin is able to cover it, but I still feel awful. People who haven't had surgery never know the right stuff to say, especially women! I've always been somebody who loves to give people positive compliments and compliments that are actually flattering. Telling somebody else they are gorgeous and looking at their positives makes me feel great. I'm far from the catty type, but many women out there are the catty types. They will say negative things about you to make you feel worse and some people give bad compliments, which leads me to wonder if they are actually compliments. They will compare me to a celebrity who I find unattractive and who looks nothing like me or they will say something stupid like my nose could be worse.

I feel awful and selfish, sitting here complaining everyday about a bad nose job. I know mine isn't the worse, but it still was a hack job by a doctor who had no business doing rhinoplasty. The bottom line is, my appearance has always been very important to me and this was devastating. While there are people who do not think about their appearance and don't worry about being the hottest woman they can be, I'm not one of those women. I'm also sick and tired of being told by people who haven't been through a bad rhinoplasty that I'm obsessing about my appearance or that I'm acting crazy or like I have body dysmorphia. I'm the last person to have unrealistic expectations. As a matter of fact, I look at some celebrities and I can't stand their fake obviously surgical looks and over-injected faces. When it comes to rhino, I do have realistic expectations and my dream was never to have a tiny nose. I realize my skin and bone structure will not support a tiny nose and it will not look good on me. I just want MY nose, but one that is a little more feminine while still being ethnic. At the end of the day, my dream is to go back to my old nose and consider a primary with an experienced rhinoplasty surgeon. Unfortunately, I can't go back and even the best surgeons jobs sometimes require revisions.

Hard piece of cartilage

Btw, I forgot to mention, I've had a hard piece of excess cartilage by the side of my nose close to my eye since I have had surgery. I'm noticing it more and more. You can't see it at all because I have thick skin, but if I put my finger there I can feel it and it feels so hard and tender when I push down on it.