Severe Case of Tuberous Breasts. New York, NY

Well it took me some time to get to writing this. Life just kind of took over after my procedure. I didn't realize I had severe tuberous breasts until I was past my teens and well into my early 20s. I was actually aware that my breasts looked different was a little insecure about them but spent no other time thinking of it. I wasn't defined by them I guess you could say. It was my primary care physician who gave me a name for the condition I had and suggested I contact my insurance provider as it is a deformity. I was about 22/23 and wasn't so motivated. I called a few times saw one plastic surgeon recommended by her and as soon as my consultation was over did not want to have this surgery. I was afraid of the permanence, the risks and to be quite honest I did not like the outcomes of the plastic surgeon I saw. So I spent the next few years of my life not caring and then become sexual active and realized I was ashamed. So I joined realself and stayed in the shadows looking for anyone like me and what they did. I just turned 30 and figured I should correct this, it's not "normal" and I just want the appearance of the natural looking breast I was meant to have. I read reviews and different surgery options. I did not spend much time or hours dedicated to finding a surgeon and I regret that. I was honestly so ashamed with having to fix something that was "abnormal" that I just wanted a fast solution. I did not want to harp on about how I would have to spend money on something I really did not want to. Also money I did not have. So I found 3 doctors, Dr Kolker was the first and only consultation I went to. I liked his vibe and office environment and his work had natural looking results. He assured me he was familiar with my case. That was he he quoted me his quite expensive price, he is on Park Avenue, and I moved on with the elected surgery with a little financial help from my mom. But mostly my life savings up until then. I can also mention that his pricing breakdown is not well explained so you do end thinking you owe one amount and are paying another.
----

Onto the surgery I am rather small framed. What would be considered a "model" figure. Tall and lean so I knew big boobs would look completely unnatural on me. At least what I figured is that I don't have any breast tissue to hold a large implant. I wanted what I thought I would be if not for my deformity. B-cup, 34-36 B to be exact. I wanted to be on the smaller side of what patients who want augmentation usually get done. I was only interested in looking normal and average. I must have siad this a million times because you read stories of patients who come out and hate the size and think it's unnatural in appearance or they want to be smaller etc. I told Dr Kolker's nurse this because after you elect to move forward to don't get much of a chance to see the doctor again. He's busy, I get it. I was honestly completely uncomfortable during this entire process and noticeably so.
Keeping this short (or trying to).
I ask to see photos of past patients and tell the nurse my concern is to have teardrop shaped breasts. Even asking about the teardrop shaped implants or gummy implants. I am met with not possibles as my case is too severe and the doctor would do his best to achieve my goal.
---
I have my surgery. I heal rather quickly. The staff was nice, the facilities excellent. However when I had a checkup and my swelling was down and I was bra shopping. My mother pointed out how small my breasts looked. I tried on bras an a 34b was actually a bit large. I AM NOT HAPPY.
I bring this to the doctors attention and he completely disregards evrything i'm saying with a completely passive attitude as if i brought this on myself! He then tells me I should have opted for the balloon treatment where they stretch the area around the implant for 3 weeks to make room.
As a doctor that is supposedly so famliar with tuberous breasts why did he not tell me this was my only option to achieve what i wanted. Instead of telling me it was my choice and the balloon treatment is usually for someone who wants a C-cup and up with a small chest area.
--
I never took before pics because I was ashamed and I asked his office for my pre-surgery pictures. That email went unanswered. So now 2 years I am post-op and I am happy that I had surgery. But I am completely unhappy in the way I was treated by the doctor. I have seen images of much more petite women with larger implants without the balloon treatment. I paid almost 20k and did not get the results I wanted and honestly cannot afford to go back. There is also fear of something going wrong that has stunted me. I would have just liked to have what I PAID FOR. And this dismissive attitude in his tone of I am having buyers remorse when I expressed this to him is extremely unfair. Would I recommend him, I am not sure as I don' t think there is much listening happening there. I would say I look natural but I would have like to look natural at a B cup as stated.

I will try again to get before photos

So I really wrote the review, to help me think out loud.
I would like to go back for whatI actually wanted from the beginning. But I am frozen in fear if I should attempt to go to another surgeon.
I think that runs a higher risk..... but not sure. Or go back since the doctor did not do a bad job at all but just did not deliver what I asked.

Confused!

on RS you can't edit posts which explains my grammatical errors in my stream of consciousness. But I think Dr Kolker is an excellent doctor in skill. However I did not get the results I asked. So there was a breakdown in communication that may cost me twice. It's frustrating for being dealt this hand,having the means to make the change and then well end up a bit disappointed.

So again here I am thinking do i just let it go even though I've come this far