Wanting the Outside of Me to Look Like the Inside of Me Feels Again. Marina Del Rey, CA

I haven't posted anything to my review for about 10 months, not because I'm not interested in encouraging others considering a facelift or those who have had surgery, but because I felt I needed to give time a chance to show me the results and then share them with you.
I have posted photos today that I just took of myself, side by side photos I took previous to my surgery and CO2 laser (both before and after photos are without any makeup or photo retouch). I am still very happy that I had my procedures. I love identifying with the reflection in my mirror and continue to not have conflict with how I appear and how I feel inside. As shallow as some find plastic surgery to be, well...call me shallow! I didn't have my surgery for anyone but myself. I feel it's no different than putting on makeup, doing your hair or keeping fit. There are some people who feel no need to revise/embellish the image of self. And to those I say fantastic. And to me who has, I say fantastic!
I had a facelift, necklift and upper and lower bleph and CO2 laser. I would have all but the lower bleph done if I had it to do over again. I haven't seen a difference to the appearance of my lower eye region but everything else I feel has given me back the face I had nearly 12 years ago. I also will need a revision done around my earlobe where the earlobes have elongated since surgery. I have what is termed Pixie ears but my surgeon can fix that with little recovery time. That being said, my face has changed since I had the CO2 laser. I love how the laser removed much of my sun damaged skin and changed the pore size of my skin. And it removed wrinkles also. But what I learned is that wrinkles are not JUST caused by the breakdown of collagen but also by the consistent movement of our facial expressions. I had no evidence of lip lines after my laser treatment. But in order to keep from getting them back I would have needed to have had Botox so my muscles in my face would not bring them back. You can see in my photos that I have more lines on one side of my face than the other. I have had 2 cases of Bell's Palsy in my adult lifetime where half of my face was completely paralyzed for about 6 weeks each time. The last time I had it was when I was 40. That time left one side of my face more lax (a bit of permanent paralysis) than the other side of my face which was not affected. The result is that the side that had Bell's palsy is not as wrinkled as the side that did not have the palsy.
The other area of my CO2 where wrinkles have reappeared is around the eyes and the area between the eyebrows. They are there because I did not have Botox.
My goal in having my procedures was to look like I feel, to recognize me again. But it was not to avoid aging or to look like my grown daughters. And if I had wanted to achieve those things with my face, I could have done the Botox and fillers. I just didn't feel for me that was what I wanted or needed.
I added a picture that was taken June 18th of this year in a photo booth with my daughters at my son's wedding. I had full makeup and hair done. In one of the photos you can see my hand. It is the hand of a 62 year old woman who has used her whole self in this life time. It is a strong hand, it is a weathered hand and it is recognized by me. I'm so appreciative of my strong and healthy body. And I am very grateful for my surgeon for giving me my face that for me is what I also recognize.
To all who have followed my journey here, thank you. I would do it over in a heartbeat!

Sorry I haven't been updating here on RealSelf but I've had some family issues that have been keeping me quite busy. Yesterday was my 6 weeks since surgery date so I have posted this photo. The pic on the left was taken a month before surgery. The one on the right was taken yesterday both with no makeup but the one on the right has tinted sunscreen as I never go without it now when the sun is up!

I'm more than thrilled with my results. I can wear my contacts again with no trouble...before my eyelids drooped so much I had given up wearing them because it distorted my vision so bad. I'm so glad I did the CO2 laser as my skin has never looked better. Dr. Grant Stevens and his staff are amazingly gifted and caring people who really try to give you what you ask for. I didn't want to look different after my facelift, just no sagging. I recognize myself now when I see my reflection and it has given me a new lease on life! I'll post photos soon with makeup and hair done!

I need to get on with my day but wanted to check in! Keep it real, RealSelfers! Hugs!