I'm not a small girl but I've always had a small...
I'm not a small girl but I've always had a small chest.
Surgery always seemed so extreme, especially considering my proportions would be better if I'd lose weight. But after 10 years of considering it and brushing it off, plenty of weight loss and weight gain, various fitness injuries and physio or rehab sessions, I've decided that my size doesn't factor into it, because no matter my weight, I'm just not happy with my boobs.
They're small - I have boobs, but they're definitely small - uneven, and 'drooping'.
The shape is definitely my biggest complaint and I'm so excited to be fuller and rounder!
I also notice this diagonal slope outwards in my cleavage - like my crease doesn't actually drop; it's quite high and it just kind of curves out.
Hopefully this makes sense when you look at photos.
I'm looking for more volume, better symmetry and a balance in my proportions.
I've had my initial consultation, a nurse's consultation and today(!) I finally get to see my surgeon, Dr Solomos (at Harley Medical Group in London), to make some decisions on size and shape.
My mom's not thrilled with it, but she's coming to London (from Canada) to help me out in Aug.
It just took a few talks. "I never wanted fake boobs. I don't want fake boobs. I'd love to be natural. But I don't want my boobs either. I just want to be comfortable with my chest.'
It took *me* a long time to be comfortable with the idea of surgery/implants, so I knew she'd be upset. Now though, a few months after I decided officially, I'm SO excited. I honestly can't wait.
I'll try to keep pictures and developments updated.
Especially because the majority of reviews I've found have been for girls who are quite thin or very in-shape and I feel like I represent the minority - girls who gain weight, everywhere but their chests. Hopefully that helps someone in their own journey or in their decisions, whether or not they pursue surgery.
I see this procedure as mostly corrective, so I'm trying to be realistic in my expectations, but I can't wait to feel like they aren't so sad looking. This post will be updated later today with my surgeon's input!
I've just had my consultation.
We had to shuffle my dates, as Dr Solomos would like me to get a small lift - which I am definitely interested in, but had been advised against in a consultation with a different surgeon.
It made perfect sense for me though, if he can make it work, without the lollipop scar, as it will mean a fuller chest, much less droop and ONLY a scar around the nipple!
Anyways. I took some before pictures, and I'll update with after pictures from Aug 23rd, onwards
Bought a bralette
Not actually sure it'll fit after surgery but it's cute and I'm interested in how it will fit later!
Less than 2 weeks out
12 days 'til I have boobs! I've been taking more and more 'before' pictures, just because I want to be able to compare properly, post-op.
Also, from reading about and seeing progress, I know it can be really hard for a while when they still haven't dropped or are taking a long time to heal, so it's nice to have a reminder of why I'm doing it in the first place. No regrets allowed!
I'm checked into a hotel room with my mom (I'd just moved into a new flat share a few weeks ago and just thought some private recovery time for a few days would be nice).
I'm being admitted into the London Welbeck hospital tomorrow at 9am.
I'm so so so nervous that I'm gonna end up with something crazy. Like too big, or they don't drop, or the lift puts my nipples in a weird place.
Just all the possible things that could go wrong.
But I trust Dr Solomos. Honestly I feel really feel good about what he does, so fingers crossed my next few weeks are just happy updates.
Here's one last pic before surgery day!
All marked up & ready to go
23 Aug 2016
Day of treatment
Trying not to panic... Not panicking... Just anxious for the results!!
High and swollen but happy!
23 Aug 2016
Day of treatment
400cc in left
425cc in right
Mentor, silicone, not yet sure what the projection is actually. Just went with the flow & thought positive thoughts!
Post-op day 1&2
Surgery was Tuesday, yesterday was spent mostly in bed and today will be the same - though I've gotten a little restless so I'll probably take a short walk at some point.
I'm actually really happy with how I've been healing. My chest is quite tender and my sternum (now very bruised) is sore, but otherwise I'm moving pretty well and can see the swelling slowly going down.
Feeling pretty lucky to have 'overs' at this point.
Follow-up appointment, removed dressings!
I'm 8 days post-op & things finally feel like they're HAPPENING!
I spent so much time in bed or just sitting around taking it easy, making sure I was healing, it felt like months of nothingggg. Plus the aches and pains that come along with the procedure...
One day my armpit would start aching (after some research it seems likely that it had to do with nerves stretching), the next my right would feel like it was trying to burst out of my crease, then my nipples would get crazy sensitive, or my sternum would be itchy, etc etc.
I have to say things are happening now and I'm thrilled, but I'd definitely class this week as more painful than last week, I think cuz so much is changing.
Anyways. Yesterday I got my dressings off! I asked her to put something back on cuz I was scared to put my bra over the incisions with no barrier, but she said i should take them off today & shower, so I've done that!
I didn't love getting the bandages off, such a weird pulling/pressure. But I'm glad to see that they're looking good! There's nothing crazy out of place or healing wrong at this point!
My left is definitely more raw-looking. It was bigger to begin with, and it has the smaller implant so I was a bit confused, but then I realized it's the one that had more of a lift, so there could have been a bit more involved with that one than I though.
I can already see the right one dropping though! I didn't think that would start for a while - it's definitely FELT like its dropping; there's such a weird itchy, aching pressure at the base of the implant where my surgeon lowered the crease. Probably for an hour or 2 a day. Glad to see its working though!
I was scared of showering.
How would the water feel on my incisions, you know?
Anyways, it really wasn't bad, I was just extra careful.
I basically lathered a pile of my antimicrobial soap in both hands and just lightly cupped them, before rinsing off.
Aha now I'm scared to put the bra back on -_-
Anyways, all this is to say, there are definitely improvements and there's progress. It's just been a little sore & scary lol. But none of it has been as bad as I thought it would be!
Here's to hoping my incisions keep up their healing!
Next follow-up on Monday.
11 days, incision update
They've been pretty sore the last few days but I've definitely seen some progress!
The only really painful part at the moment is the bottom of my left breast, where he did the lift. The skin is sooooo sensitive/raw feeling, and I think I can see stretch marks. It feels like weird shocks when I touch it.
I'm not massaging yet but I've started moisturising the skin around my nipple - leaving incisions out of the mix.
Yesterday I hit 2 weeks post-op!
Had my second follow-up on Monday & was told they're looking really good and that I could start massaging them - leaving out 'scar treatment/massage' until at least 3 weeks.
Excited for them to soften up!
I can't decide if I'm just getting used to them or if they're starting to sit more naturally. Either way I'm definitely happy with my results.
I'm a little worried about right incisions/scarring.
To be fair, it looks a lot like the left did for a bit with red spots and stretching skin, which could make sense if it's starting to drop/stretch a different area?
Might consider calling in for a nurse check if it doesn't improve soon, but I think it will be fine.
Last time I posted, my right incisions were red and inflamed.
Since then, I had a spitting suture come to the surface (I noticed a small spot in my sports bra, from seeping, for 2 days, and on the 3rd day, there was a spit stitch).
So there had definitely been an issue with the stitch healing properly, and as a result my right is still trying to sort itself out. But it's much less scary looking now - at least in my opinion.
Still fairly firm.
And the skin on both have been really itchy this week.
But I just love t
Pics from previous - hit post by accident!
It's gone by so fast!
So strange, if it weren't for them still being fairly firm, I would feel like the whole process was a solid year ago.
Things are healing pretty well. Right is finally starting to soften up more (and will hopefully drop soon?!).
Sutures have mostly dissolved so I'm excited to start treating scars soon!
Starting to get weird electric shock feelings around my nipples. Rarely, but I started noticing them yesterday.
They're so soft & amazing!
They've dropped pretty well - my right started rounding out last week, hoping it goes just a tad lower.
The only thing I hope improves now is the scarring.
I've been trying to massage them, so they aren't so thick/lumpy, (that's also why they're a bit redder in these pics than usual).
They are so good. Better than I thought they'd be.
They'll never be perfect.
They're still slightly asymmetrical and
They'll never be perfect.
They're still slightly asymmetrical, mostly because my right side cleavage started so high & so far in.
Also because of size but honestly I don't mind that.
I think they're bigger than I intended (even though some days they seem so small!).
If I were to do it again I'd probably go 375/400, rather than 400/425.
Also the projection, big shown here. I think id have preferred a moderate+.
None of this is complaining because I do love them.
Just kind of.. Hindsight.
I've gained some weight this month so hopefully that doesn't change the progress pic too much, but hey.