255cc Natrelle 410 MF

I've known of this website for about a year and have been on it almost everyday reading reviews and surgeons comments. I've wanted a BA since a teenager and always knew one day i'd get one. The idea seemed like a fantasy until this January, someone close to me revealed they were getting one and it sparked me into thinking and planning seriously about getting it. Since then I've been to 4 doctors.. I said it's extremely important to me to stay modest and get a conservative size.. I hate the "fake" looking boobs that are very round and too big. I'm 5'2 115lb and a 32B.. I want a C cup and max 250cc. All the doctors i talked to have suggested in the range of 215cc-300cc under the muscle cohesive teardrop implant. The doctor i decided to go with mentioned he usually goes slightly larger than what the patient asks for.. I'm torn between trusting him and letting him go larger or insisting on a smaller size. My pre-opt appointment is July 9 which we'll talk about size and pre and post instructions. :)

So I had my pre-op yesterday. It wasn't what i was expecting. The doctor wasn't there which makes me nervous since I only met him at the consult and won't see him until surgery day. I met with a nurse that will be present during the surgery. First was initalling a lot of paper work. The papers consisted with thorough pre and post op instructions as well as a 2 page list of every medication you can't take two weeks prior. We then talked about what to expect the day of the surgery and the following days. Then after the appointment i the paid the reminder balance. My excitement has recently been fading and I'm feeling very nervous and almost guilty about doing this. Ive looked at almost every topic on this site but when i saw the breast reduction and their wish boobs were like mine as they are now i started to feel like mine aren't that bad.. although i will go through with it and most likely love them Im scared they'll be too big. Even though i could remove them if i choose they'll never be the same as they are now.. I will make a strong point to the doctor the day of the operation saying to not go bigger than i ask.

So tomorrow i'll go to the surgeons at 8:30. They told me to expect to be there 4 hours. I know ill be talking to the surgeon before about my expectations and what i want. After the surgery they said i'd stay in the recovery room for about an hour where they'll have me eat some snacks and drink... I'm not excited or nervous i feel like its not real. I don't think how I'm feeling about this is usual to most girls. Every review i read they're all excited and can't wait and i feel most times sad. Sad that i won't be the same ever again and my boobs as i know them and have known them will be gone.. Yet i still want to do it. I've wanted this since i was in middle school and now that its happening I'm just not so excited as i expected.. i hope this is the right decision. i know they'll turn out looking good but I'm still sad. my ideal BA would not involve an implant but be only a fat transfer but they're significantly more expensive.. I don't know how ill be feeling physically afterwards but ill try to update soon afterwards