46 Year Old, 2 Kids, 4 Abdominal Surgeries and Previous BR - Fayetteville, NY

This isn't about vanity. Yet how do you convince others of that. And why should you have to. In the end, it is a decision you make for yourself.
Guilt...yes. Over money (other things are always more necessary); over recovery time (someone else will have to handle daily tasks for the family); over vanity (how do you teach healthy body image to your preteen).
I had endured 2 CSections with vertical incisions, 9 years apart; a umbilical laposcoptic tubal ligation; and a recent hysterectomy via davinci robot. I had a breast reduction 18 years ago. They are bigger now than before the first reduction!! I continue to have neck, back and shoulder pain with nerve impingement.
In 2010, I had a consult for TT with a local medical spa. However, I didn't feel comfortable or confident with the doctor or facility. Glad I went with my gut because they closed a short time later.
Last summer I saw a local board certified plastic surgeon. I left his office feeling awful about myself. He made comments about not doing the 2nd BR and how I didn't have enough to remove for insurance purposes and while manipulating my abdomen, commenting to the nurse about visceral fat like I wasn't there listening. Never once did he consider that I would be a self pay for whatever insurance didn't cover. I felt dismissed.
I finally went to another doctor who specializes in BR and TT (mommy makeovers) and felt completely comfortable after my consult. Surgery is scheduled for September 10, 2014.
I'm fighting the feelings of guilt on a daily basis. But I know it's not about vanity, my overall health will benefit, and my self confidence will increase.

I had a recent mammogram and breast ultrasound as a regular checkup just before my surgery consult. My consult went great, I am very comfortable with my PS and the office. Surgery scheduled.
Then I get a letter from radiology stating they are monitoring a finding on my mammogram/ultrasound. So I immediately get an appointment with my breast care specialist. He reassured me today that he feels it is just some cysts and that all tissue removed during BR are checked by pathologist anyway.
Geez, that was close....

One thing about being self employed is that you are so busy that time just passes before you know it. In the days/week since my last update, my husband has dropped the other shoe in his support. Now I get " do you have to get both the breasts and the tummy done ?" Really?! You have to ask. Say what you mean. Yes it's a lot of money. Some tears and emotion on my part of feeling like the only one I thought was in my corner fully, really isn't. This is for me. I will not back down because of someone else's reasonings. So I have to be strong for myself. I believe the end result will be well worth it.
On another note, I received my hospital surgical paperwork today. This is really happening . I have preop appointment with surgeon on 25th. Surgery on Sept 10th with a calendar packed agenda until then.