28 Year Old, Open septo-rhinoplasty

For as long as I can remember ive been unhappy...

For as long as I can remember ive been unhappy with my nose. I thought as time went on and as I'd get older I would learn to accept it and live with it, but my feelings towards it have never changed. I have a deviated septum and a crooked Roman nose, it's a family nose and my dad is very sad that I'm choosing to change it as I inherited it from him but it has to go! I HATE photos from straight on as you can see my nose sits nothing close to Central, and as for the side profile I hate that too. I've never been teased or bullied and I wouldn't say I feel ugly, it's just a part of me that doesn't feel like it should belong to me, and I know that any work I have will be an huge improvement! I'm getting married in 2017 and the thought of having people snapping away at me from all angles make me feel quite physically sick to be honest. From certain angles I'm ok but I don't want to feel 'ok' on my wedding day, I want to feel beautiful and comfortable from every angle. Planning to get married was definitely the push I needed to go ahead and finally sort out my horrible nose and I'm so proud of myself for booking it! I'm scheduled in for my op tomorrow in Chester with Mr Tahery and I can honestly say I don't feel nervous in the slightest. I feel like I just can't wait to get it over with so I can see my new nose! After doing lots of research I found Mr Tahery to be one of the best and after a consultation with him on March 31st felt so at ease and booked the surgery there are then. His work looked amazing and his reviews are great too and they both speak for themselves. I got a great feeling from him and im feeling positive he is going to do a fantastic job. Can't believe after 29 years im finally saying goodbye to my nose... :) will update after surgery, wish me luck x

7 hours post op - feeling great!

So, I had my op at 6 this evening, and was completely nerve free just up until I walked into theatre and it hit me! Thankfully it was short lived nerves as 10 minutes later I was under. Staff have been incredible, simply cannot fault them. When I woke up I felt a little groggy for a couple of hours and very dehydrated, I was so thankful to be able to drink again! I had a bit of pain when I initally woke up too but morphine soon sorted that out and up to now, 7 hours post op I've felt fine and not needed any pain relief. I've managed to get a few hours of sleep here and there but as someone who usually sleeps very flat I'm struggling to sleep so upright, also sleeping with my mouth open is taking some getting used to, I'm just making sure I drink plenty of water. Other than that I'm feeling great considering what ive had done. A long way to go yet but I'm so thankful that so far everything has gone as smoothly as it has. I can already tell the shape of my nose has improved, even with the cast on. Very excited for the 'unveiling' haha. So overjoyed that I've finally bitten the bullet and done it! X

Almost 24 hours post op :)

I'm almost 24 hours post op and feel great! My surgeon visited this morning and said surgery had gone very well and he was excited to see the final result... Not as excited as I am though! Cast removal is a week away and will be the longest week of my life! Got discharged at 2 this aft, and managed to sleep for the majority of the 2.5 hour journey home which was a relief as I was so tired. Think I'm starting to get used to sleeping with my mouth open now, the dry mouth is definiely something I won't get used to though. Driving me a little bit crazy, but in the big scheme of things totally worth it :) ive not had any real pain, keep topping myself up with painkillers though every 4 hours, I want to make this situation as comfortable as possible for myself! Prevention of pain is better than cure in my eyes. I've been using arnica lotion for the bruising on around my eyes but it's too early to see any improvement, a lot of people on here swear by it though so it's definitely worth a try. Also just gently cleaned the nostril area with damp cotton buds and a saline spray I was given, felt a little tender but was nice to get all the big chunks of dried blood off my nose. Also read that drinking pineapple juice helps with healin for bruising and swelling so giving that a shot too, not that I can taste anything! Lots of little things to look forward to, sleeping flat, breathing through nose, enjoying the taste of food, and obviously my new nose :)

Day 3

Well I've woken up this morning feeling pretty rough. It's 7am and I haven't taken pain killers since midnight. I feel quite groggy and nauseated. My nose throbs and stings a little around the stitching, it feels quite tight. I'm dreading being sick if I have to be! Feel like it would rug and pull at my stitches. Had a lot of watery blood oozing from my nostrils which I was told to expect. Not sure why I don't have a dressing on it like I see a lot of people with. It feels tender to keep drying it away so I've just started to leave it and I feel pretty gross to be honest. The dry mouth thing is horrendous, this is probably the most difficult part. I'd love a bath or shower and to wash my hair but even after sleeping around the clock I don't think I can muster the energy. I knew from other people's post that it would get worse before it gets better. I know there is going to be an amazingly bright and wonderful light at the end of the tunnel so im going to try and stay upbeat, just trying to leave the most honest account I can so people know what to possibly expect. Will update later when I'm hopefully not feeling as rubbish :)

Today has been quite tough...

I last posted this morning at 7, I wasn't feeling too great and that pretty much continued into the rest of the day. I was sick this morning after I wrote the post, it was actually a relief and made me feel much better but I had to be so careful not to heave as I could feel my stitches pulling. On a scale of 1-10 pain wise, pain has been at around a 6. I layed off painkillers for a while as they were making me feel sick but I had to start taking them again after a few hours, I should've known taking them on an empty stomach wasnt going to do me any good, I just haven't had an appetite. I managed to eat a fair bit though and it really made me feel so much better! Managed to go sit downstairs with my BF for a couplenof hours and considered getting a bath, as I feel absolutely awful, but I just wanted to go back to bed to sleep. Painkillers are making me very lethargic and tired but right now that's a good thing as I'd like to pretty much sleep through this whole healing process if I can. I'm also wondering if anyone else got given a saline spray solution to spray up the nose to cleanse it? My nurse gave me it without any real instruction. It says to spray up each nostril but mine are packed and blocked, I'm worried if I spray around the area I'll wet the cast too? Also don't know how often I should be cleansing it??? I'm going to call hospital tomorrow for guidance. My bruising and swelling seem really minimal which I'm greatful for and the arnica cream seems to be reducing the bruising so I would definitely recommend that to people. It's now 2am, just waiting for the pain killers to kick in and hopefully I'll be able to get back to sleep. X

A better day :)

Today has been much better. My bruising and swelling is really calming down and my pain is minimal, it's more of a headache today but totally managable pain wise. I'd say pain today is a 4. I've been cleaning my nostrils with the saline spray every few hours and I can now breathe through one nostril which also means I can taste food again :D not quite feeling 100% but certainly feeling better on the whole.

Headache from hell!

Today started off great, thought Id reached a turning point in that I felt pain free, had an appetite and some energy! Past two hours though my head has just pounded! Feels like pressure above my eyes all In my forehead. Painkillers won't touch it. My bruising had pretty much gone now and the swelling has too. Had a bath last night and washed my hair which made me feel human again :) been cleansing my nose with the saline spray which has made huge improvements, nose area looks clean and free from gunk and blood and I can almost breathe properly through my nostrils. Nose has stopped oozing today too which is was really greatful for. My nostrils seem so small and the columella seems huge!! Looks very wide, I'm assuming it's very swollen and will go down, otherwise I'll have an odd look! Starting to get myself a little worked up about the final result. Feeling more nervous about seeing my nose than I was going in for the op. I'm going through the usual 'what if I don't like it/doesn't suit me/looks ridiculous/ look like miss piggy/wasted my money' road with my thoughts. Too much alone time to sit and obsess over every single little thing! From reading other people's reviews this seems a normal thought process though. Without wishing my life away I would love to be a few months down the line with my new settled, none swollen nose! Long way to go though yet... Will try and be a little more postitive in my next entry. X

Feeling crap!

Woke up this morning feeling lousy again. Hate the dependancy im having on painkillers. My nose feels different this morning, it's feels more obstructed. I think it may be packing that's worked its way down into my lower nostrils although I could be very wrong. I could just be swollen, really feels like there is something there though. Past couple of days I've started to get itches under my cast, it literally feels like someone is tickling my nose with a feather, it's unbearable! Also went to rub my nose last night in my sleep forgetting I had a cast on and that certainly woke me up!! Just feeling a bit sorry for myself at the moment, 5 days house bound, alone really isn't much fun. (Moved house and city 2 weeks ago so no friends or family live local anymore!) Thankfully I get to meet with Mr Tahery tomorrow, can't wait for him to look my nose over and tell me I'm fine and healing as I should be. Hopefully I'll snap out of this silly low mood and today will be a better day. I feel like I've had it quite easy compared to other reviews ive read from others. X

Cast off

Well, today was the day I went for my first follow up and to get my cast off. Mixed emotions. The cast removal was very uncomfortable, the bones in my nose are still incredibly tender. The stitch removal nearly made me pass out and I'm usually very tolerable with pain. I almost cried when I looked in the mirror when the cast was off, my nose looked horrendous. He told me it was very swollen. The shape looked nothing like I had imagined, it looked pointy and bulky and nothing like the small, delicate nose with a cute round tip I had imagined. Im trying not to let it upset me as I know that almost everyone feels like this after cast removal. I know I still have a very long way to go yet. The side profile is definitely straighter and better though. Trying to stay positive x

Feeling very low and anxious

Since my cast removal yesterday my head has just been a total mess. I'm starting to regret the whole thing. I just want to cry. I can't shake the horresnous image of my nose out of my head. It just looked awful. If they know it's going to look so bad then I'd rather they not show you and just tape it straight up again. Now I have an agonising weeks wait until i can see my nose again and the thought of it is filling me with absolute dread. I'm reading reviews of people who loved their nose on cast removal. I'm starting to think that mine has been botched. I keep trying to tell myself that Mr tahery is great t what he does and the before and after pics are fantatsic but im just getting myself so so worked up. Im looking in the mirror every 5 seconds obsessing over how it's going to look... Is this normal?! I feel like I'm going to have driven myself insane by the end of the week. The thought of going back to work is also filling me with dread, infact the thought of seeing most people I know is filling me wirh dread as everyone is so excited to see my new nose and what if it's absolutely horrendous? I think id be house bound. My collumellar has been botched in my eyes. It's nowhere near alligned how it should be. It's very jagged and uneven and looks like a piece of gristle. I'm actually sat here with tears in my eyes thinking about how awful it looks. From a side view it just hangs down. I don't see how it can heal into a smooth finish? I'm just devastated. I also have a horrible smell in my nose, it smells like infection. I've done nursing for years now and I recognise the smell a mile off from treating wounds. If I look into my nostril there is a large pea size lump that looks to be oozing and bloody and pus filled. It's quite close to the nostril opening. I think it's infected. I can't go back to see mr Tahery again though as its 2.5 hours away and I can't afford it. I'm just in a mess. I feel like this is the only place I can talk to people who understand or who have gone through similar. X

Feeling better :)

So, this afternoon I was very naughty and I took my tape off. I just HAD to see my nose and comes to terms with what was lurking underneath. The vision of my horrible nose after cast removal was just well and truly stuck in my head, so for my own mental health and the sake of keeping relatively sane I had to have a look. All I can say is WHAT A RELIEF! This was the best move I could've made, I've totally and utterly calmed and reassured myself that it will be fine. It was still incredibly swollen, especially around the tip, and there was a slight bump where my old bump was removed but I know all this will die down. I was very happy wit what I saw so now I know it can only get better from here. This has seriously been the hardest thing, mentally and emotionally, that I have ever gone through. I'm usually a very level headed, calm and what I considered strong and rational person but this has definitely allowed me to see other sides of myself. It's made me feel quite weak, naive and pretty much helpless. Everything is beyond my control at this point, I just have to sit back and play the waiting game. I'm feeling much less stressed about my next appointment and going back to work and facing people now. I've re-taped my nose back up, the same as how it was taped up before. I didn't allow myself to take photos as I knew is scrutinise them to hell so I didn't do it to myself. Overall I'm feeling much more positive about the general shape and appearance. I'm still not convinced the Collumella will heal as I'd like but I need to allow myself to heal. Thankyou to everyone for your kind words, it really does mean so much, especially from people who know what going through. Things can only get better from now. X

9 days post op

Just thought I'd give a quick update and add some photos. I've felt much better about things past couple of days, I think tht may be due to having my bf with me though. It's when I'm alone my mind starts to become nose obsessed. My bruising and swelling has almost completely gone. I'm still applying the arnica cream regularly to clear up the last little areas. I'm totally pain free and can breathe through both nostrils, making sleeping and eating much easier. Its so nice to be not being reliant on medication, especially codeine as the constipation is just another thing to contend with. I found drinking pineapple juice helps with constipation and also aids with the healing process. So stock up on pineapple juice, I think this has also helped me heal quite quickly. My nose is very clean now and crust/blood/gunk free. I've been rigourous in cleaning it 4-6 times a day, and the swellings inside my nose that didn't look too great have almost completely healed. I feel like I'm making progress every day, even if it is only a small amount. I'm trying not to get too hung up about the Collumella situation and hoping to clear the situation up with my surgeon when I meet on Thursday for tape removal. I'm half daunted half excited to see the progress. I think I will feel incredibly exposed when the tape finally comes off and my nose is bare. Still have massive butterflies for when I see all my friends, family and work colleagues for the first time. I don't feel ready for all the fuss and the questions. Taking each day as it comes.... X

Day 11 post op

Mixed feelings about my nose still. Heard a lot of concerning comments and stories about my surgeon from various people and I'm starting to worry and feel anxious again now. I feel like id just not even bothered putting myself through all this heartache. Im getting married in 2017 and the thought of the wedding is making me incredibly anxious. Im going home to York for a day out with my family today, this is my first outing and I'm feeling very self conscious. Want this whole ordel over with. My nose still remains pain free and I'm breathing clearly, no blood or crust or nastiness. Just a little sore and tender near the bones. X

Collumella scar update

I've had a few people ask me how my Collumella scar was healing, as I was pretty upset with the initial results (understatement- I was BESIDE myself!) ...however... I feel that I has actually improved, ans smoothed out a bit. From the sides it's looking more flush so I'm hoping as time goes on (and as I learn to become more patient) it will continue to heal further into the look that I'm wanting, which is basically to just have a flush, unnoticeable scar! I must admit though from the bottom view it looks awful! I look like I've had a cocaine problem and my nose has collapsed. As I'm tall, 5ft 11 almost, I worry that people will be able to see it more. I'm also quite self consious about tilting my head back. I hope this fades and smoothed out though, as I didn't pay 5.5k to have another flaw that I'm self conscious about. Time will tell. Would love to know what other people's opinions and experiences on this are too. Apologies for my terrible skin in these photos, I absoloutely cannot wait to exfolioliate and cleanse my skin again!! X

Old photos

As I get my tape off tomorrow and my new nose will be 'unveiled' (feel a little bit sick at the thought still) I was looking through photos of me to find pics of me and my 'old nose' from particularly bad angles, to show it in all it's horrendous, crooked, Roman glory! However I struggled as I pretty much always took photos from a certain angle to minimise the look of it. I did manage to find a few though from my recent trip to India at the start of this year. The first few pics are from the 'approved' angle, where camera trickery makes my nose look normal- ish. The latter are what can only be described as diabolical. Just thought I'd put some up so that you can really see the difference.

Tape removal 13 days post

Today went well. Mr Tahery was very pleased with how I had healed, and the natural shape of my nose. Still quite swollen as to be expected but I'm pleased with the overall shape, I know the 'bulkiness' will die down. All my concerns were addressed regarding my collumella, I was assured it would heal with time. I am prepared to wait and see as I can already see its healing already. I was assured if I wasn't happy with end result laser therapy would be available to rectify. feeling pleased with progress so far, and feel more at ease. Looking forward to seeing my end result more than ever now! X

Sticky tape residue- how do I get it off?!

Just a quick question. Does anyone have any advice on how to get the sticky tape residue off my nose?! It's covered in dried up scabby tape gunk and it's so hard to get off. I've tried using a a soaked cotton pad to dampen my nose but it's not shifting! I've peeled a fair bit of the dried stuff with tweezers but I'll be here all day. Looks a bit unsightly that's all. X

22 days post op

Thought I'd give a quick update as havent posted in a while. Not a great deal of change since last post really. Had a bit of a knock to my nose last week which made it bleed which really worried me. It was incredibly painful even though it was a relatively gentle bump. Contacted my surgeon and he said I shouldn't worry as i didn't have any continued pain or swelling, everything looks and feels to be ok. My only issue is the unsightly scars on either nostril as you can see in photo. Does anyone else have these?! I will be very upset if they scar as they are very visible at the moment and unsightly and it will be another flaw im self consious about. I'm not even sure what they are from?! Mixed feelings about my nose still. I'm love tr side profiles but it is still very bulky and wide and swollen in my opinion. I hope it improves quite dramtically from now until it's final look. Collumella scar has certainly improved but still visible on a side. I have a stitch near my Collumella scar which is poking out. I was told it will go eventually but I'm starting to wonder if it will as I'm over 3 weeks post surgery, it feels very tight, I think this sticth may be the reason why my scar isn't healin flush on that side, as then skin is pulled tight with the stitch. I'm not sure though, in all honestly im sick to death of thinking/worrying about my nose now. It's been a tough 3 weeks to say to least, nothing could have prepared me for what I was about to go through. It's my first day back at work today and I'm feeling quite anxious but that's to be expected. I don't want everyone looking at my nose as it feels far from perfect yet. Will be glad when this whole process is over. X

still unsure about my nose

Thought I'd give an update as its been a while since I last posted. As it stands im very unsure about my nose so far. At the current moment in time in not particularly happy with it. It seems to change from day to day. It's not as tender to touch anymore which is good, so washing and cleansing my face is much more comfortable. The tip is still quite hard and I have most feeling back in it now. It is incredibly sensitive to cold weather though, it's very uncomfortable, dreading the thought of winter when it's truly bitterly cold! The incisions on my nostrils are slowly going as I was told they would. One side has healed completely but the other side is still visible, one side was a much deeper cut though so it will take longer. I have a dent on my left nostril which ive noticed the past week or so. After researching it seems to be quite a common problem in the early stages of healing, these things seem to come and go. Spoke with my surgeon and he assured me it's a common problem and part of the healing process. The tip of my nose still looks bulbous and quite angular this week... As I said, it changes all the time. Trying not to get too hung up on stuff and just realise that my nose has just had a pretty brutal operation so It needs time to settle. My collumalla, healing all the time but still not quite flush, the stitch that is poking out is so tender and is driving my crazy!! It's like a little whisker, is very sore around the area, think it may be a little infected as there was some pus build up this morning. Haven't been as rigourous with cleaning though as I've returned to work now. I still have two big lumps inside my nostrils that haven't shrunk at all! My nose still get scabby on the inside with gunk, I think it's the internal lumps/swellings that are causing the bulbous points visible from the outside. Overall I'm not happy with how it looks. If this is what te final result is then I'll be absolutely gutted, but I'm pretty certain that there's a lot more change to happen and it will start to settle soon. I'm only a month PO, but belive me, it has felt more like 6months! X

Almost 9 weeks PO

No change since my last post really. Still have the same worries. From the side my nose looks to be ok but from head on its still very wide and bulky. Saw my surgeon who has been great throughout the whole thing, and addressed my concerns. After examining me he said I was very swollen still even for 2 months PO, I do have thick skin though so I have to take this into account. I'm to have cartilage inserted where the dent in my nose is but that won't happen for a while yet. I'm on antibiotics to bring swelling down, I'd that doesn't work it's steroids. Overall still not happy with how it looks, I feel quite depressed about it in truth but I'm trying not to let it take over my life. X

worst decision I ever made.

Deciding to go ahead with this operation was what I thought would be a life changing moment for me, and it has changed my life, but not in the way I imagined. It has ruined my life, made me depressed, anxious , miserable and turned me into a person I don't recognise. I absolutely hate my nose. I'm told that I have severe swelling, which is obvious to see especially from head on as my nose is bulbous and bulky. I've been on antibiotics for 3 weeks and they haven't touched it, I'm starting to wonder If it is swelling at all or if this is the horrendous nose that I'm going to be left with. I cry every day over how ugly it looks and how awful it makes me feel about myself. It's taking its toll on my fiancée and I's relationship and I'm not sure how much longer our relationship can take the strain of me feeling a low as I do. We were supposed to getting married next year and all plans have been cancelled and I feel deformed. My nose is just a horrible blob. I just can't believe how diffenrent it looks from what I imagined. I wish I had never had it done and actually wish I had my old nose back and 5.5k back in my bank to put towards our wedding. Im very worried about the future of how my nose will turn out but also concerned about my mental health as I'm in a very low place at the moment. I don't even know how my partner can look at me, I actually feel uncomfortable when he looks at me, which is heartbreaking for both of us as I end up pushing him away. This is totally ruined my life. I'm currently on Clarithromycin and ive read it can bring on feelings of depression and anxiety, by sure if this medication is enhancing my already low mood. Either way it's not working and I feel I need something stronger such as steroids, something has to change soon. I can't carry on like this. I'm speaking with my GP tomorrow so hopefully they can help me out. X

Before and after pics.

Extreme change in width.

Slight improvement

So, for the past few nights I've decided to tape my nose up and go back to sleeping elevated. I woke up on Saturday and my nose seemed much less swollen and you could actually see definition. I was thrilled! I couldn't stop looking in the mirror and smiling. Sadly though my nose seems to have returned back to normal which is a bit disheartening, but seeing that it can change has left me feeling more postitive. I've been in regular contact with my surgeon and he has been really great with me. We've discussed a lot of issues at length and he has really reassured me. The one thing that has stuck in my mind was when he told me to cast my mind back to how my nose looked after cast removal, it was refined and had a great shape, I thought it was swollen at the time but that was NOTHING compared to how it is now. He said that underneath all this swelling is the nose I saw that day on cast removal before all the swelling had chance to well and truly kick in. Ive gotten myself so worked up in the past few weeks about my nose and how it looks now that I had forgotten how different it looked at the start. Remembering that image of my nose at the beginning is what is keeping me from going insane and is my little bit of light at the end of this horrendously long and dark tunnel! I'm back on a course of Clarithromycin too for another 2 weeks. Anyway I'll update when I next see some improvement, which I really hope is soon! X

Hideous nose

I'm having a particularly bad day today, and I've found myself feeling very upset again, but to be honest this is how I'm feeling quite frequently now. Most days are bad days where my nose is concerned. In the past 3 months I would say I've had 2 or 3 days where I've managed to feel quite positive and upbeat but I think deep down I've known that I'm not happy with my nose, I just can't see past it with all its flaws. No matter how I try to make myself feel better, hair, clothes, makeup etc, it's still a horrible nose starting back at me that sadly I can't escape. I feel so stupid for being vain enough to spend the money for our wedding on this awful nose that's left me with more flaws than when I started and I wish that I'd left it well alone. I'm full of nothing but tears and regret. There is no way I could put myself through a revision so I'm resigned to the fact that this is the nose that I'm left with. If the day does ever come around that I'm ready to get married I know that I'll be left feeling like the beast instead of the beauty. The incision mark on my left nostril has scared horribly, and next to it is a dent where the cartilage appears to have not formed/collapsed so I always shy away from talking to people if they are on my left as I'm so self conscious about it. My Collumella scar looks awful and very noticeable so I have to make a conscious effort to not tilt my head back. My nose looks a different shape from different angles as can be seen in the photos. One side looks rounded and beaky and is starting to go flat at the tip and the other side is pointy and angular, and the flesh under the Collumella seems to droop and hang too far down. Since my op my skin has become so oily and greasy around my nose, it is just a constant oily, shiny mess. I've also developed sleep apnea, I've never had any issues with snoring/sleeping/breathing before but now I regularly wake myself up with little snorts and grunts which disrupts my nights sleep and leaves me feeling exhausted. Everything is just a mess. I feel stupid telling everyone that I've had a nose job as all I can see them thinking is 'you paid all that money for THAT nose?!' Ive not had one positive comment about my nose as Im not sure people know what to say. There's been no 'wow, you look great, your new nose looks lovely!'. It's heartbreaking. The toughest part though is the low opinion I now have of myself. I feel hideous and I hate myself for wasting our wedding money on a nose that was worse than before. I can honestly say that for the first time in my life I am truly depressed. If there is anyone here reading this that is considering having a nose job then I urge you to give it some serious thought. I'm not here to scaremonger or slag off my surgeon, I'm here to give an honest account of just how tough it can be. Don't get me wrong surgery can be the most amazing life changing experience for some people, but it's not always the case and there can be so many complications with this surgery, and believe me when things start to look like they are going wrong it is a rough ride and a very lonely road. This site is the only place I feel I can come where people can truly empathise as they are going through a similar experience. Who knows 6 months down the line my nose may have changed dramatically, as I am confidently told by my surgeon that it will, but that is the unknown and at this moment in time I don't see how it can change so much, I'm genuinely terrified that this is my 'new nose'.
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