POSTED UNDER Rhinoplasty REVIEWS
Biggest Regret of my Life - Victoria, AUS
ORIGINAL POST
Like so many of you on here, I wanted to get my...
E.m.kMay 3, 2014
$10,000
Like so many of you on here, I wanted to get my nose done since I was an awkward teenager. When i was 8 years old i fell on the road straight on my face but it wasnt till I was in high school where my nose developed quite crooked. Through my teenage years I avoided photos and was quite depressed about my looks and dreamed on having a normal looking nose. When I got into my 20s I started to embrace my unique look and even though I dabbled in the thought of getting my nose done i just put up with it because it was mine. Going into my 30s I had my own sort of confidence about my appearance. So I thought why not just get a slight adjustment. Nothing major just to remove some of the hump. I never wanted a small nose, just a straighter more symmetrical version of what i had. I guess I was blind sided by the before and after photos. Thought that it was going to be conservative. I gathered all my bravery and money to book my surgery and on the day of surgery I was so scared I almost had a panic attack in the waiting room. If it hasn't of been for my mum having to fly across the other side of the country and take 10 days off work then I would've walked out that day. I wasnt sure I should be doing it but I felt like the pressure was on and I had come so far already that I "should" do it. I've always trusted my gutt instincts and for the first time I went against them. Now in hindsight I wish I hadve just walked out.
It's be the hardest, saddest and lonely 8 months of my life. I can't bare to look at myself in the mirror. I don't take photos, it breaks my heart to see old photos of myself. It's now that I can see what everyone else saw in me. That beautiful happy go lucky girl with a big nose and a big smile. Now I have an open roof deformity, more crooked nose and my smile is ruined. My surgeon told me it was going to be an improvement. Nothing about this surgery has been an improvement. It's created so many problems that I would do absolutely anything to take back that decision. I've turns into a hermit. I'm embarrassed and heartbroken. If they hadve told me that my smile would be ruined I would've never gone thru with the surgery. Even if there was a slight chance, I would've never of risked it. Now I have a crease under my nose and a double top lip. I don't even smile anymore. I wish I hadve listened to my friends who told me to love myself more and change my views rather than change my face. It's upsetting to think that for the rest of my life I'm going to have this hanging over my head. This deep sadness and regret. 8 months ago I never knew sadness and depressing like this even existed. For all if you going into surgery and thinking about doing it. Maybe take the time to look at urself the way other do. We are all beautiful in our own ways. There is no standard of what beautiful is. Be happy with what you were born with, because that in itself is beautiful and no one can ever have your uniqueness. Enjoy and value yourself everyday. I wish I hadve been stronger and accepted what I had and valued myself. My heart is utterly broken
It's be the hardest, saddest and lonely 8 months of my life. I can't bare to look at myself in the mirror. I don't take photos, it breaks my heart to see old photos of myself. It's now that I can see what everyone else saw in me. That beautiful happy go lucky girl with a big nose and a big smile. Now I have an open roof deformity, more crooked nose and my smile is ruined. My surgeon told me it was going to be an improvement. Nothing about this surgery has been an improvement. It's created so many problems that I would do absolutely anything to take back that decision. I've turns into a hermit. I'm embarrassed and heartbroken. If they hadve told me that my smile would be ruined I would've never gone thru with the surgery. Even if there was a slight chance, I would've never of risked it. Now I have a crease under my nose and a double top lip. I don't even smile anymore. I wish I hadve listened to my friends who told me to love myself more and change my views rather than change my face. It's upsetting to think that for the rest of my life I'm going to have this hanging over my head. This deep sadness and regret. 8 months ago I never knew sadness and depressing like this even existed. For all if you going into surgery and thinking about doing it. Maybe take the time to look at urself the way other do. We are all beautiful in our own ways. There is no standard of what beautiful is. Be happy with what you were born with, because that in itself is beautiful and no one can ever have your uniqueness. Enjoy and value yourself everyday. I wish I hadve been stronger and accepted what I had and valued myself. My heart is utterly broken
UPDATED FROM E.m.k
9 months post
So many people suffering
E.m.kMay 5, 2014
I've had so many sweet heartbroken people contact me privately that are going thru the same thing. I find it upsetting that everyone is suffering in silence. So many lives ruined yet no documentation about these bad rhinoplasty cases. I urge you to post your reviews. You dont have to mention your surgeon publicly, just get the word out there so more people know the ugly truth about plastic surgery and all the things that can go wrong. I know if I hadve seen more negative reviews it wouldve made me reconsider. The disappointment of not getting nose surgery cannot be compared to the aftermath of a bad surgery. I was none the wiser about what I was getting myself into. If this review makes a difference in one persons life and makes them reconsider such an unnecessary surgery then my job is done.
Replies (26)
May 6, 2014
I'm so sorry you're hurting so much about this. I have heard of lots of people regretting their surgery. But also lots of satisfied folks. It's terrible that you fall into the first group and for that I really feel for you. I hope you're able to come to some sort of peace with this over time. Thank you for sharing!
May 7, 2014
I can relate and am so sorry you're going through this. It's hard to describe the emotional pain and regret you feel after a bad experience, but I agree the risks are not outlined clearly enough and many people would be better served not going through with rhinoplasty in the first place. Particularly for minor changes. :(
May 8, 2014
Yes definitely not worth it for minor changes. i think that if i spent 10k on a new wardrobe, new hair and new makeup and perhaps a few session at a phsychologist, it wouldve boosted my confidence much more than this disaster surgery. I think everyone should have this approach first before deciding to go under the knife.
May 8, 2014
Very good point! Agree completely. And throw in a short vacation to Turks & Caicos for some relaxation and reflection.
November 3, 2014
Have a revision rhino. I've had an extensive one. It's an improvement but was quite rushed. You can fix your nose, I promise you but you need a revision rhino. Fly to Texas and go to Jack Gunters rooms or Dr Nassif in Beverley Hills or Warick Nettle in Bondi or Dr Pinnock in Sydney. Make sure you have multiple pre op appointments to nail down what you want. Some surgeons treat patients like they are on a conveyor belt.
November 3, 2014
Thanks for the tip. I wouldnt bother with Nettle. Im disgusted at how he has treated some of his patients and forced them to take their negative reviews down. U cant even be honest anymore without having them threatening to sue you. I dont trust aussie surgeons anymore, they only know how to do [RS bleep] and not faces. Revison is such a gamble and i dont think i am ready emotionally to take that risk. If i was going to consider anyone to do a revision it would be Frankel or Davis.
November 3, 2014
i dont know. like i said i havent considered revision just yet. all the best with yours
July 22, 2015
Why does that not suprise me of Nettle. I agree Stephen Pearlman in New York is meant to be good.
December 19, 2014
Thanks for commenting on my original post. I'm sorry you are feeling down about your surgery as well. It has been 4 1/2 years since my initial rhinoplasty and like I said, I totally regret it. I look at pics of myself before and hump was actually cute and gave me character. I think it's hard for us (rhinoplasty patients) to deal with our new identity because we look different. I feel like parts of my nose look bigger than before and some parts look unnatural. It really isn't worth it. It's so sad that most of us have to go through the surgery to appreciate our natural birth noses. The thing is, I would have never stopped thinking about a nose job until I actually had it. My mind was always on this surgery since a boy in my 5th grade class told me I had a big nose! I think I would have grown into it more, I was only 19 when I did the surgery. Boy have I grown up a lot since then and my world views have changed tremendously in just 5 years time. I always think if I would have went to more consultations I would have chosen a different doctor and maybe my nose would have turned out ok. But I only saw one doctor for a consultation and I was so excited I booked the surgery that day..... Unfortunately, it's only in hindsight to we regret. So it's time to learn to accept our new noses (just like you said we should have accepted our old noses) and see the positive in it all. It seems to be depressing you majorly and I think you should highly consider revision surgery with a skilled specialist. I am on my quest right now for a revision surgeon and have had several consultations. Also, my nose has changed so much over the years as well.. it has changed even more after the 2nd, 3rd, 4th years.... It kept getting smaller and smaller and more crooked :-\ It seems like my nose isn't supported very well and I cannot breathe out of either sides of my nostrils... It's unfortunate you cannot take bake rhinoplasty, it is permanent and you can only go through revision to try to build it back up and reshape. It's interesting that you say it changed your smile, I would really like to see photos to see what you meant. Although I didn't post my own photos because I appreciate the anonymity this site offers. I hope you get to feeling happier and definitely reconsider the revision so you can feel happier. I will update about my experience for my revision surgery if you'd like to follow my story. I have many appointments with several doctors up until February, then I will make a decision. I would absolutely love to go to Dr. Davis in Miramar but they fill up with consultations up to a year in advance. So even if you are considering him but not sure, call and make a consultation with him. I am looking to have my surgery within 4-5 months because I cannot live with my nose another year longer. I am so ready for this surgery. Best of luck to you and cheer up!!
December 20, 2014
Thank you for making contact. It baffles my mind how the nose keeps changing every year!? So many people have said that and then they say the first two years they can breathe but in the third they cant. I think that a rhinoplasty guide should be written by people who have gone they surgery to give a realistic view of this rhinoplasty journey in preparation for people considering this surgery. If I hadve known that the nose kept changing and collapsing I wouldn't of compromised my nose even tho I didn't like the hump it still suited me! I didn't wanna swap my hump for functional problems! I'm already starting to get restricted airflow and it's only been a year and 4 months so I'm not looking forward to what the future holds for my nose and breathing! There is nothing about my nose that is nice anymore.. Not even the skin covering it. He ruined every single thug possible on my nose. I'm starting to pick myself up from this depression and I don't have so many sad days but I never feel confident and usually avoid eye contact. My personality has changed from happy go lucky to shy/reserved. It too might take me few years to fully get over the trauma of surgery and be willing to go under the knife again. My trust is gone and even tho I have done so much research, I'm still scared. I'm wishing u all the very best with consults and I will be following your story closely :)
December 20, 2014
Sorry you had these issues, E.m.k. I've had rhinoplasty and revision rhinoplasty and did experience what you describe as far as my nose collapsing from the first rhino, but I was not under the care of a very experienced rhino surgeon. Things are much better after my revision 10 years ago. All is to say that if I am writing any guides you read, you will know they are written by someone with experience.
December 20, 2014
I agree with you and applaud you for encouraging people to post their negative experiences. It is only right to have ALL experiences out there, not just the good ones. But why not mention the surgeon's name? Wouldn't that help people avoid something bad?
December 22, 2014
If you mention your drs name not only do you have to deal with the bad surgery you have to deal with the threats from their people telling you to take down your review!!! In australia there arent many surgeons so they try protect their reputations as much as possible. Ive been in contact with a lady from sydney going thru this exact same thing. The surgeon told her it is costing him 100's of thousands of dollars because she stated the name of her surgeon in her review. Basically she was just writing her experience but this is considered slanderous supposidly. The dr didnt care she was unhappy he seem to care about his reputation and the money. There is no such thing as a perfect surgeon and there are going to be variences in results, but only the positive ones have a chance to survive on public display! It makes me sick how this whole things operates and u just dont realise this till you are in the situation yourself. If someone wans to know who my surgeon is they can PM me i am more than happy to tell them who he is... im just not going to do it publicly.
December 22, 2014
Gotcha! That is really terrible...it sounds like the doctors and their fans bully people into silence. That is wrong. People should 100% be entitled to naming whoever operated on their face. Legally, unless they are saying untrue things, you are entitled to speak about your experience, good or bad. I understand not wanting to be bullied- I've been harassed here by a person under multiple names just for what she thought was an insult to a surgeon she likes. But we can't let these people intimidate us, or keep others from knowing who the surgeon is who did a bad job. Their record are skewed without the whole truth. But I'm glad you will share it with people if they ask.
December 22, 2014
Well that's right it's only slanderous if it's not true but in their eyes they shouldn't have any bad reviews to ruin their rep. I just want people to choose carefully and ask the right questions. Study the before and after photos because they give you clues in what your nose will most likely look similar too. And also to make ppl love themselves before going into the surgery. I'm wishing u all the very best with ur upcoming surgery. Take good care. And I'll be following ur story closely :) can't wait to see ur results
UPDATED FROM E.m.k
9 months post
It wouldn't be me...
E.m.kMay 9, 2014
Before going in I didnt see many negative reviews. I'm pretty certain that the percentage for success was much higher back then when I was making my decision. As time goes on the percentage is dropping slightly. I went in thinking I'm not going to be one of the few bad statistics. We all think it won't happen to us. Then it does! No mattrer how well u researched and prepared urself it seems like even the best surgeons have their bad days at work. This surgery is such a gamble, u don't know how ur body will heal either, u don't know how ur nose will change 2 or 3 years down the track..the constant stress has just not been worth it. I hope that everyone thinking about rhinoplasty really considers all of this before going in and maybe also considers reading a few bad reviews to get educated on the aftermath of a bad surgery. To learn of the isolation, regret, grieving and depression that arise when things go wrong.
Replies (8)
May 14, 2014
Hi there, thanks again for reading my review. I share your pain. I also experienced the same thing: that there were not many negative reviews of rhinoplasty when I had my primary done back in 2010. I have since figured out why: 1) websites like this that would allow patients share their stories either didn't exist or if they did, few people knew about them, 2) many doctors monitor and manipulate review websites such as ratemd and demand that the admin deletes their negative reviews, 3) many doctors threaten unhappy patients with "slander and defamation" lawsuits and blackmail them into signing a "gag-order", and 4) a botched plastic surgery is such an excruciating and private pain that you cannot share that with anyone. There is such guilt associated with it--that you did it to yourself and you are responsible for what happened to you. I kept quiet for years and it was only recently that shared my story and it was such a relief and what an educating experience! I now know these facts from my own personal experience and many others who have shared theirs with me. Keep well and hope one day this painful journey will end for all of us :))
June 17, 2014
Thats the most disturbing thing that ive discovered about this world of plastic surgery that you cannot even express your experience in fear of being bullied by the people who work for the surgeon to try and protect their image. And this is where the problem lies, how can we truly know the success rate of this procedure and weather it is worth going through if we cant see both sides.
I too hope that this pain will end for all of us that are suffering. And god knows there are so many of us sitting in silence and suffering privately.
June 2, 2014
Maybe you can try to correct it with fillers to how it used to look or get a revision which is more expensive than the fillers! Goodluck!!
June 17, 2014
I have tired fillers and althought the first time was successful, when i went in for the second time it turned into a disaster and now my nose is even more deformed because he overfilled and had to dissolve it :(
October 5, 2015
If you ever wanna chat, I'm here too. So much of what you say I relate to. I've been suicidal over my bad primary and bad revision. Take care
September 9, 2016
I'm having my second revision rhino today at east Sydney with dr David caminer
Replies (22)