Just the Beginning…

What. A. Ride.
I was pretty terrified on surgery day, but everyone was so wonderful that, even though I was scared, I felt like I was in very capable hands. The anesthesiologist was calming and everyone was asking me about my kids, so the happy thoughts before going to sleep were at the forefront of my mind. The last thing I remember was someone asking what kind of music they could play for me and I said “Play something happy” and I was out. lol
I was in pain right after waking and stayed that way pretty consistently for a long while. Sleeping during recovery was hard, but luckily I’m a stomach sleeper normally, so that wasn’t exactly the difficult part. Going potty, kneeling, laying down, showering, everything was so. damn. difficult. I was never comfortable, couldn’t sleep for more than an hour or so at a time, and nobody gets real about how badly you smell. I had to get used to just being gross and ugly for a while. My body didn’t feel like mine. There was a numbness I just can’t explain and I was afraid of my new body. If I could give any advice, it would be to prepare mentally, go slow, stay off of social media and away from everyone else’s experiences, and just be patient with yourself.
My results are not perfect, but I knew they wouldn’t be going into this experience. I didn’t want perfect though. I just wanted BETTER. I wanted clothes to fit better, I wanted my confidence to be higher, I wanted to feel feminine and curvy in the correct places and I definitely got what I wanted.
Now, the pain is gone, the numbness and tingling have mostly subsided. I still have days where I swell, but after so many months, I’m feeling pretty normal otherwise. Sitting is still a little weird, but not at all painful.
If you’re considering Dr. P, he and his staff are so amazing. I LOVE his nurse, Xan. You cannot go wrong. Highly recommend.

I had my pre-op appointment on Thursday. I live nearly 3 hours from the office and I was so jazzed the whole drive there. Based on my phone consult, I was feeling confident and sure, but when I walked into the office, I was extremely nervous. I don’t know where the heck my confidence went, but it wasn’t anywhere near me. The moment I disrobed, I just wanted to crawl into a hole. I was embarrassed and, as ready as I was to be there, I wasn’t ready for the feelings I had standing nearly nude in front of my partner and a couple of strangers (however professional) while being pinched and squeezed and just…LOOKED at. But that has less to do with the doctor and staff and more to do with my own traumas. Dr. Parikh and his staff were wonderful, informative, and down to earth. Diana and the nurse who was in the room with me were extremely sweet and great at lightening the mood. They made me feel as comfortable as possible given the situation, for sure. I feel like I was given a realistic idea of what kind of result I could expect given my body type and skin type and such. While my ego is still wounded, I feel ready to proceed and I know I’ll be in good hands. Surgery is in just a few weeks. Wish me luck!

Pre-op and surgery dates are booked! Y’all…I wasn’t expecting to IMMEDIATELY get nervous as hell. Lol The patient care coordinator, Diana, was super sweet and talked me through kind of what to expect from the pre-op. I’m scheduled for March 12th for my pre-op and June 3rd for my surgery. I know I’ve got some time to kill, but now it’s REAL, ya know? I think I’ve already got most of my post op supplies (I’ve been randomly purchasing along the way, so I’m not making myself go broke. Also, thanks for the ideas TikTok! lol), so now..we wait.