22 Year Old, 5'4".. 115lbs, No Kids, 371cc moderate profile

Basically since high school started I've thought about getting breast implants. 7 years later, I have made up my mind and have decided to just go for it instead of waiting until I'm older. My mom got saline implants about 10 years ago and ever since then, the idea of having a BA hasn't been so unrealistic (before I always thought only celebrities got their boobs done). I patiently waited for my boobs to start growing but they have basically been the same size since I was 13. I guess you could say I am pretty petite.. I am about 5'4" and my weight fluctuates between 110 and 118 pounds. In my opinion, my shoulders seem wide for my small frame, but I'm hoping bigger breasts will make them seem less huge. My legs are nice and skinny and my butt is proportionate to my body but my boobs are just flat. I used to wear a 32AA until a girl at VS made me try a 32B and it fit soooooo much better. It's probably because I typically buy push-ups and those require more space to fit your boob on the "shelf". Either way, I don't feel or look like a B cup and I heard that their sizes run super small anyway. (But i'll take it! ha) I do like everything about my boobs (the shape/position), just hate the size of them. This is basically the only place I can vent because my boyfriend is getting tired of hearing me talk about boobs. He says mine look great and I don't need the surgery, but is super supportive of my choice. I also think it will be cool to document my journey, especially if it helps someone else.

My main reason for wanting the surgery is because I feel inadequate in most of the clothing I want to wear. I am obsessed with fashion and cute clothing and struggle to find shirts and bikini tops that I can actually fill out, without looking so flat chested. Even though having small boobs means you don't have to wear a bra, I feel like if I don't have some support, I look like a 12 year old. This limits the styles of clothing I can wear without feeling self conscious about my tiny boobs (deep v neck, backless dresses, cutout shirts, strapless things..etc.) I am so tired of wearing padded bras and bathing suits and having a limited selection of styles that look good on my body. I also just want to feel more adult and womanly.

I have been doing endless research online the past few months, and have found a surgeon I am extremely confident in. His name is Dr. Rockmore and he is located in Albany, NY (a few hours away from my apartment in Vermont). I thought his before and after pictures all looked great and the results seemed natural looking. One of my biggest pet peeves is when implants are far apart from each other and there is an awkward wide gap in between the breasts. All of the women in his before and afters had nice cleavage. Also every single review of him that I found was 5 stars, so I thought that was really impressive. I had my consultation with him back in April, and it went great. He was very confident in his work and informative and answered all my questions. He even mentioned how he hates the boob gap (without me even having to mention it) and explained how he uses a 3 dimensional approach to make sure implants match the width of his patients chests properly. That was very comforting. I brought in a bunch of pictures of boobs I liked and he looked at them all. His opinion was that they were all a very large size for my small frame and that I would need at least 400cc to achieve that kind of look. Now that I am looking at the pictures again they do look huge for my body!!! I definitely don't want the fake look so I'm not sure what I was thinking, but I am so glad he made that point and that he wants me to look as natural as possible. He recommended moderate profile plus *silicone*, under the muscle, somewhere in the 300cc range. I tried on the sizers (the wrong way at first, they were like under my boobs... super low and saggy lol) and then decided that 350cc seemed like the perfect fit. He agreed with me so as of now, that is the size I'm going with.

I scheduled my BA for mid-late December, so that way I could save some more money and could hide my fake swollen boobies under sweaters and jackets while they are starting to drop. I figured that I wouldn't mind staying inside when its freezing outside. Plus, my job does require lots of lifting and reaching above my head, so I am taking two weeks off around Christmas so i have enough time to heal and my co-workers think I just went to visit family for the holidays.

I am a little bit nervous about going too big. I know implant cc's and sizing is so subjective and 350cc looks different on every person. On some girls they look HUGE and on others they are perfect. I have looked at so many before and afters and have come to the realization that I will have no idea what my boobs will truly look like until after the surgery once they have healed. My mom wishes she went smaller.. she asked her surgeon for a full C and she has a full D. They are REALLY big but they look good on her. I think I am leaning towards having a small C but would be okay with a full C too. I just know its really hard to find cute bras when you have large breasts, and I don't want it to be crazy obvious that I went under the knife. I feel like giant implants just look gross. He wants to do the incision under the breast fold. I can see how you could be more precise about positioning the implant that way but I am a little worried about scarring. I haven't seen that many pictures on here of scarring once it is completely healed, so I am wondering how visible they will be once everything is all said and done. But to be honest, I am just excited to finally have some boobies. From looking at before and afters (and just using common sense) it seems like if you have nice boobs before the surgery, they are going to look the same pretty much, just bigger. So when I am like "oooh jeez hers look crooked or far apart" or something, typically they were like that before. I understand surgeons have to center the implant under your nipple so they really cant change too much about the way your breasts look. This thought has me staring at my boobs in the mirror all the time, trying to picture them with implants. I am pretty hopeful and think they will look amazing.

My surgery is still about 4 months out so now I am just playing the waiting game. I'll keep updating this thing and post pictures as time goes on.