In 2006, we set out to create a world where anyone can read honest reviews, see real before and after photos, and connect with qualified doctors. Now RealSelf is 15, and a lot has changed since we launched. This month, we’re looking back at industry trends that have shaped where we are—and where we’re going. Thank you for sharing your journey with us over the years. To celebrate our 15th anniversary, we’re giving away more than $25,000 in prizes. Click here to enter the sweepstakes.
After 15 years, we’ve heard enough about the life-changing powers of plastic surgery to know it’s anything but a superficial pursuit (although there’s nothing wrong with a little vanity). Ultimately, people get procedures to feel good about themselves, but everyone’s story is different. We asked RealSelf employees, Verified doctors, and community Ambassadors to share what they’ve learned about the motivations behind peoples’ decisions to get plastic surgery.
“We want to be our best, real self—no matter what it takes”
“An outcome of being the founder of RealSelf is that over 15 years, I’ve made a lot of connections with surgeons and doctors. Because they know me, they tend to speak in a direct, very unfiltered way. One interaction with a plastic surgeon really caught me by surprise and made me feel defensive, but it ended up opening my mind to being proactive about my own self-care. At a medical-conference cocktail reception, a surgeon walked up to me, stared me in the eyes, and yelled out, ‘Are you just going to get old?!’ At first, I laughed and deflected with humor, stating, ‘I prefer that option over others.’
“While there’s plenty to be said about the crass delivery from the doctor, I later found myself internalizing the question and exploring what I want for my life and if doing an aesthetic treatment would make me feel like my most confident self. I admitted to myself that I wasn’t loving that, as a leader in technology, I felt dangerously close to aging out, being one of the oldest in the room. I also took stock of the fact that the mirror reflected the damaging effects of years of blissful tanning and playing in the sun without an ounce of sun protection. And perhaps most challenging for me and the role I play, I accepted that I felt the social stigma that is so often attached to cosmetic procedures—Am I really this vain? rang in my head.
“I decided that I would at least dip a toe in aesthetics and asked a dermatologist friend if I could try laser skin resurfacing. The treatment was definitely ‘Worth It’—it was like getting years of skin-care neglect made up for in a 30-minute session and three days of peeling skin. But the gain definitely took some pain! Midway through the laser session, I involuntarily began to shed tears. My friend saw this and asked, ‘Why is it always the men who cry?’ I’d like to think that’s because we have to come so far to accept that we too want to be our best, real self—no matter what it takes.” —Tom Seery, executive chairman and founder
“Beauty and surgery choices are personal”
“As a newbie to the industry initially, I wasn’t sure what to expect. After I had been at the company for a few weeks, I was trying to recruit new people—and it was fascinating, how some people loved the idea of RealSelf and others saw this huge stigma with surgical procedures. In some cases, so much so that they wouldn’t even take a call to talk about roles. Fast forward a few months, and as I talked to more candidates and people in our company, I realized that beauty and surgery choices are personal. I started to hear stories ranging from increased confidence to how procedures can change lives. One person I know had a double mastectomy due to breast cancer. She talked about how cancer had taken so much out of her, not only energy but her confidence. She was on the fence about getting breast augmentation, but once she did, could not believe how much it changed how she felt.
“Unfortunately, many people jump to judge others, and in this space, what I have learned is that after having a successful procedure, nearly everyone talks about increased confidence and how that impacted their lives for the positive. So after 15 years, it’s great to see this initial stigma flip to a celebration of people being able to make their own beauty choices.” —James Coyle, CEO
“It is okay to do something for themselves”
“The idea of plastic surgery often stems from either an insecurity that has bothered patients for years or changes that have occurred during life from pregnancy or weight loss. In the past, patients were limited by guilt about doing something for themselves instead of their families. They often felt like they were the only ones in the world doing something for themselves. These days, with so many people sharing their experiences on platforms such as RealSelf, they now know that is not true. They have done so much for other people, and it is okay to do something for themselves. They just want to be a more beautiful version of themselves, to match their inner beauty—which, for most, is also a huge confidence boost!” —Dr. Johnny Franco, board-certified plastic surgeon in Austin, Texas
“Procedures can be identity-affirming”
“I didn’t want to have to think about my cancer every day”
“I was 35 when I found a lump in my right breast. My doctor said I was so young, it was probably nothing, but I could get a mammogram if it would make me feel better. When I finally went in, my diagnosis was stage 4. They revised it to late stage 3, but the tumor was so big and close to my chest wall they had to shrink it down with five months of chemo before my mastectomy.
“They took so much tissue that I was left with not much more than skin over ribs. The first time I peeled back the bandage, I felt nauseous and had to sit down, which my surgeon said was normal. In the months after they deemed me cancer-free, I worried a lot about my left breast. It felt sinister, and I decided this wasn’t a time to be sentimental. I didn’t want to have to think about cancer every day.
“My mom and I started meeting with local plastic surgeons who could do a second mastectomy and reconstructive surgery. My case was a tough one. Most surgeons recommended the latissimus dorsi flap method, taking muscles from my back to layer over breast implants. But my physical therapist warned me that I might live the rest of my life with back pain, as many of her patients do. And it wasn’t clear whether I’d have enough skin on the right side to have a good result. Then a plastic surgeon recommended a center in New Orleans where they were doing reconstruction with microsurgery. They could move tissue from my hips to rebuild my breasts.
“This was my best option, so I flew from Seattle to New Orleans. I had a left-side mastectomy and initial reconstruction on both sides, and I came home looking pretty rough. Five months later, I went back so the surgeon could refine the contours, make nipples, and transfer fat from my thighs to my chest.
“Recovery wasn’t easy, but after I’d healed, I could go days without thinking about cancer. It’s been nearly a decade, and I’ve never regretted my surgeries. Lately, I have started thinking about having some fat transfer, to fill in the deep hip dips that were left when they took the tissue. Possibly a little more to make my breasts semi-symmetrical. And then a tattoo to cover my still prominent scars. Mostly, I’m just happy for my health. But I also plan to enjoy life in this body for decades to come. Why not make it feel even more like my own?” —Mari Malcolm, director of consumer content
“Patients come to see me because it’s important for them to obtain a very natural-appearing nose”
“I was introduced to Tom Seery when he presented the idea of RealSelf to me on his laptop computer before he ever formally launched the company. I knew that he had a very exciting concept and that this company would get a lot of attention. Consumers needed something to uncloak the mystique of plastic surgery.
“RealSelf has been an enormously important platform for patients to do their research about a specific procedure. This is especially so with rhinoplasty, because it is the most difficult and technical operation to perform correctly in the entire field of cosmetic surgery. Patients come to see me because it’s important for them to obtain a very natural-appearing nose that is balanced and fits with their facial features.” —Dr. William Portuese, board-certified facial plastic surgeon in Seattle
“They wanted to feel good about themselves”
“The first question we asked ourselves at RealSelf, before we had the reviews, the doctors, and the mission we do today, was ‘Will people even talk about this?’ I started at RealSelf in 2006, before plastic surgery went mainstream. There were no Real Housewives or Kardashians, and very few people were willing to admit they’d had anything done. The conversations I saw in the media were often negative and humiliating.
“One of my first assignments was to interview women about what they did to feel beautiful. I got to talk to real people, some of whom were just doing makeup and skin care, and others, who’d had transformational surgeries, like tummy tucks and thigh lifts. I got to see the people behind the procedures, and their motivations were the same—they wanted to feel good about themselves. Now we know that people will talk about medical aesthetics. Not only that, they will provide an immense amount of support to one another along the way. Finding the humanity in a once taboo topic was what inspired me, but the community is the reason I’m still here, 15 years later.” —Sharon Walls, community operations manager
“Plastic surgery has been a form of self-love”
I grew up in Los Angeles, where plastic surgery has never felt taboo. I got a nose job at 16, and it allowed me to stop obsessing over that feature and scrutinizing every single photo of myself. Did it change my life? No, I could have lived with the bump—but I would never have loved my nose the way I do now. Why struggle to accept something you aren’t happy with, when there’s a solution? I’ve Botoxed my forehead lines, filled my cheekbones, liposuctioned my jawline, and Emsculpted my way to abs. For me, plastic surgery has been a form of self-love.” —Alix Tunell, deputy editor
“I was making a change for my health and to be a better mother”
“I started my journey in 2014, with a gastric sleeve operation. I was over 300 lbs, with a baby I couldn’t put on the floor for tummy time unless my husband was home, because I couldn’t get up off the floor on my own. I didn’t want to pass on my bad habits to my child, and I really worried that my weight would lead to some bad health issues. Since I was making a change for my health and to be a better mother, I really embraced this as a springboard to change my life. I lost 100% of excess weight, and that led to my plastic surgery journey.
“After keeping the weight off for two years, I had a circumferential tummy tuck. I used RealSelf to research the procedure, read my doctor’s reviews, and learn about what to expect—it was so helpful to my preparation and healing. Then, in September 2020, I had brachioplasty, to remove the excess skin hanging from my arms.
“My plastic surgery has pretty much always focused more on my health and mobility than anything else, but the next procedure I would like to get is really all about me! I’m self-conscious about my neck and lower face, from my old double chin, so next year, I will most likely get a lower face lift.
“Many people see plastic surgery as just vanity or unneeded. From gastric sleeve to skin removal, my procedures have changed my life. I have a new life! I ride bikes with my family, run, hike, all the things I couldn’t dream of doing before—and I do it without the skin rashes and irritations from loose skin. But now it’s my turn to be a little vain too!” —Christina C., RealSelf Ambassador
“I never had the courage to do it”
“I’ll never forget a woman coming up to me in New York City at the House of Modern Beauty. ‘I love this event!’ she exclaimed. ‘I have been thinking about getting some filler for so long and never had the courage to do it. I am going to do it today, here in this beautiful space.’ This is why we do what we do.” —Kristin Black, VP of industry partnerships
“Life is short, and the time to live our best lives is now”
“When I first came out of residency, everyone ‘surfed’ the internet on a desktop rather than a phone, and plastic surgeons still took ads out in the yellow pages. Today, while word of mouth and one’s reputation among their peers are still the gold standard, the power of a surgeon’s online presence cannot be underestimated. Combine this with the accessibility and acceptance of plastic surgery among the general public, and what we have is a unique and powerful demand for what we do, with no obvious peak in sight. Procedures are becoming more efficient, with less downtime and discomfort for patients, noninvasive procedures are booming, and the pandemic has had many effects, one of which being that as a society we have been forced to reevaluate our priorities and perhaps understand better that life is short and the time to live our best lives in now.” —Dr. Shahram Salemy, board-certified plastic surgeon in Seattle
“People get plastic surgery for so many reasons”
Over the past 11 years at RealSelf, I have been humbled by so many stories and reasons that people get plastic surgery. In my early years, I was admittedly limited in my view of what plastic surgery was, what problems it could solve, and why people did it. One thing I know for sure—there’s not one right answer, and nobody should ever judge what confidence means to someone else. People get plastic surgery for so many reasons, from breast reconstruction after battling cancer to getting back your pre-baby body because not all women respond the same to pregnancy. Some get plastic surgery so they can breathe again, some to remove skin as a reward after massive weight loss. Simply put, some of us are on a journey to look different, some to stay the same, and some to just feel better. Cheers to RealSelf for creating a safe space for people to learn more about what’s out there and what’s right for them!” —Kirsten Mann, VP of customer success
“I longed for my pre-baby breasts”
“I always felt very satisfied with the size of my breasts throughout my 20s. When I was 28, I had my first child. My breasts grew to be gigantic, and I nursed my daughter for a year. I had no idea that when she weaned, my breasts would change so dramatically. They were practically gone, except for some loose skin, and they were no longer even.
“Flash forward a few years later, to baby number two. Same scenario—only this time, my breasts were left even more deflated after a year of nursing. I longed to get back what I once had and loved about my body.
“Thanks to RealSelf, I was able to browse the app daily and read about others’ experiences, check out several profiles of Verified surgeons, and ultimately choose the best surgeon for me. My doctor was able to replicate exactly the breasts I used to have, only a little bigger, with very little scarring! I couldn’t be happier to have had the opportunity to restore my confidence through breast augmentation while also taking pride in nourishing my babies through breastfeeding!” —Marcella B., RealSelf Ambassador
“Plastic surgery is something to be celebrated, not hidden”
When I was in training, prior to the internet, we had a saying: ‘If a patient is happy with their cosmetic procedure, they will tell one person. If a patient is unhappy, they will tell 100.’ The internet and RealSelf changed that. People who were uncomfortable with telling their best friend they had plastic surgery could now interact with hundreds of strangers on RealSelf and even share pictures! It has changed the way people view cosmetic plastic surgery into something to be celebrated, not hidden. And because of this willingness to share with strangers, procedures like labiaplasty that no one talked about 15 years ago are now discussed openly. It will be exciting to see just where the next 15 years takes us. Congratulations, RealSelf on your anniversary!” —Dr. Melinda Haws, board-certified plastic surgeon in Nashville, Tennessee
“Patients want to just feel better about themselves”
“Over the past decade and a half, I have heard many of the same reasons from my patients as to why they come to me for hair restoration procedures.
- To find a life partner
- To be able go to fancy restaurants without wearing a hat
- To be able to wear a ponytail or messy bun without exposing a huge forehead
- To go swimming without worrying about Toppik smearing down their forehead
- To be able to stop worrying about wind disrupting their combover
- To stop worrying about their hair makeup staining the pillow when spending the night with someone
- To sit at the front of the lecture hall without worrying about others seeing their bald spot from behind
- To drive a convertible without the wind blowing their hairpiece off
- To have a beard to feel more masculine (transgender)
- To have a feminine hairline (transgender)
- To just feel better about themselves” —Dr. Jae Pak, hair restoration surgeon in Los Angeles
