I've been reviewing this site for the past 3 months now, and I am so happy it is here! I'm a very private person, but I feel like I should contribute since so many others have. I've been keeping up with several girls and enjoy hearing about their journeys. So here is mine! ; )
I am a little older than most...I'm 44! Like so many of you, this is something I have wanted to do for a LONG time but never have. I recently came to a decision that enough is enough...I'm tired of my current size, wearing padded bras, being self conscious of my small chest size, uncomfortable in a swimsuit, etc. So I decided no more "wishing" it could be different. I'm ready!!
A little about me...I'm very happily married to my best friend for 23 years and have two children in their low teens. My husband is supportive of my decision, yet he has told me many times he is very happy with me just the way I am. He's such a sweetie and I love him beyond words. I am telling NO ONE about my surgery, not even the kids or family. Just my husband knows. Over the past 3 months I have worn rice sizers in a sports bra to slowly increase my size, and I think that has been successful. No "double takes" or "strange stares" at work. If everything works out the way I hope, I'll end up very close to what it looks like I have been.
Now back to my journey...I'm 5'7"...currently wear a 34A...and weigh 145lbs. I have already had my consult and chose my surgeon, Dr. Jennifer Buck. Let me say a few words on that. The staff was very friendly, Dr. Buck had a great bedside manner, the facility looked top notch, and her before/after photos looked good. Surgeon selection...DONE! Because of my age, I had to get pre-screened for surgery (blood work, EKG, and chest xrays). I'm in pretty good health...don't drink or smoke...so that all went fine. Next came my pre-op appointment where I filled out my paperwork, got prescriptions, saw Dr. Buck again, and made final payment. Everything went as expected, and I tried on sizers with the nurse. I will be going with Mentor silicone implants, imframmary incision, sub-facial placement. Dr. Buck said high profile would be best for me somewhere in the 300s for cc amount. I tried on 325cc and that was OK. Then I tried the 375cc and that was OK as well but slightly larger. So then I was like which one??? Knowing so many wish they had gone bigger and I might lose some volume once inside, I said let's go with 375cc.
Then I get home and start looking at girls with that size and profile. Holy cow...is that going to be too big!! ENTER in my mind...doubt and worry. I'm trying not to stress over size. I'm really not set on a cc amount and know that Dr. Buck will be my best determinant. She said she would try sizers in surgery and go with what looks best.
My next post will be my wish boob pics. I did post some of me. Sorry their not the best quality.
Updated on 18 Nov 2013:
I forgot to mention that I did NOT breastfeed my kids (although I tried unsuccessfully with my first). I'm sure that will come into play during surgery for sizing. From the pics I'm posting for my wish look, you can tell that I'm not going huge. I just want what fits and doesn't look too fake. If that means 325cc...then I can live with it or if it means 375cc...then I'm fine with that too although I feel that is my max. We'll just have to see what my PS will goes with. I am concerned for the high profile. Most of my wish pics are for moderate to moderate plus. I don't want too much projection or my nipples in a weird place.
I have to admit that I go through "decision" swings. Like...I'm I really going to go through this? What am I doing!? Do I really want to put myself through pain? What if there are complications afterwards? Is it worth it? Then I have moments of...I'm finally going to feel normal! I can feel the confidence and will power swell inside and think without I doubt, this is what I want for ME. If so many other women can do it, so can I.
Updated on 25 Nov 2013:
I guess I'm ready. The house is clean, all Christmas decorations are up, everything is laid out for tomorrow, and two alarms are set for my 6:00 a.m. wake up. Earlier today I was second guessing but I feel better about it now. My fear is not so much the effects of surgery but that I wont' like the end result. I know it's all in my head...I'm an over-thinker! Oh well, off to get some sleep. I will keep those who are interested updated as often as I can tomorrow. Wish me luck! : )
Updated on 26 Nov 2013:
Well, I've been home for about 2 hours now. I'm feeling good considering I was expecting the worst. I did feel a little nausea on the way home so I took a phenagrin and laid down for a while. Just took my first pain pill and am watching some TV. I nibbled on some crackers and drank a little water. The worst part of the whole deal was the IV! LOL So my recovery is going good so far!
My breasts feel a little tight, firm, and slightly numb (all to be expected). I haven't had a chance to take a picture but I will. I do have drains (yuck) that I will have to wear until my post-op on Monday since the office is closed on Friday. She said this is standard for her when doing subfascial implants. I'm suppose to empty them every 6 hours or so and record the amount. I was not sure going into surgery on size, but Dr. Buck went with 325cc on both sides and said those looked perfect on me. Thanks for everyone's thoughts and prayers. I'll post again later tonight with pics.
Updated on 26 Nov 2013:
Here are a few pics. Hard to tell much from all the bandaging.
Updated on 27 Nov 2013:
The doc told my husband that today might be rougher for me and she was right. I feel like I'm a little more swollen also. I'm taking my pain pill every 4 hours. I sure hope at some point it will get better. I'm really feeling it on my right side where my incision is. I'm never at a point of being pain free even with meds. It just makes it more tolerable.
I'm also hoping I like the size. They really don't look that much bigger, but I remember reading about others feeling the same way. I can't wait until my first post-op visit on Monday. Hopefully she will take off the bandages and I can get rid of these drains!!!
Updated on 28 Nov 2013:
Today has been better for me. I've started to slack off on the pain pills. I think some of the swelling is going down and my drains are barely filling. Really nothing new to post. I may try to get out a little tomorrow and just wear a sweatshirt to hide my drains. Still can't take a shower so I'll get my husband to help me wash my hair in the sink...that should be fun!! Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!
Updated on 2 Dec 2013:
I got my drains removed today!!! I hate to say it but it was painful and I cried like a baby. I've read where others said it didn't hurt but it did for me...it was not fun. I got to look at my new boobs for the first time without bandages and I am happy to say I'm very pleased! Doc said the 350s made me look too top-heavy and bulging at the collarbone so that's why she opted for the 325's to give me a more natural look. I need to find a different bra to wear under my clothes because the surgical bra doesn't hide my nipples very well. I also get to take a shower today. I'm slowly getting back to normal and it feels great
Updated on 8 Dec 2013:
I feel great hardly any internal tightness although my skin looks a little tight to me still. I've had another preop appointment. Everything is looking good and the doctor placed brown tape over my incisions to help with healing. I asked her if she thought there would be much more change and she said to give it to the three week mark and then everything will probably look more like they will. Very happy with the natural look... not too big not too small just right for me. :)
Updated on 17 Dec 2013:
So I'm at 3 weeks and not a lot of change. I went for my 3rd post op last Friday and she snipped off the external knots to my stitches. She also gave me exercises to do (up until then she told me to not massage). I'm also taking vitamin E for CC. Although I think I look OK naked, they get lost under my clothes, and I'm a little disappointed about that. Yes, they look "natural" but on the "natural" small side. My right was slightly smaller going into surgery and it still is. Not sure why she didn't go a few more cc's in that one...at least 25? My right also looks like it is still tight although I don't feel like it is. My left looks fuller to me. I'll give it more time to see how it all comes out. I'm trying to lose weight (horrible time to do so) hoping that might help. I have a feeling I'll be back in padded bras and this is NOT what I wanted. Feeling a little down. The procedure is worth it...but for the money and pain I've had to go through, I should be 100% happy and at this point I"m not.
Updated on 17 Dec 2013: