Soo Excited but Scared at the Same Time! - United Kingdom, GB

Hi All

I'm 47 and have had large breasts ever since I can remember. Like many, I was teased at primary school which left me with a complex about my chest. In the last 10 years I've had to stop any sports that I used to play due to extreme stress on my neck and shoulders & I see an osteopath almost every week

I had my pre op appointment yesterday. They took bloods, height, weight, swabs for MRSA, urine sample etc. Then talked me through the whole process - reassuring.

I have bought 2 front loading bras but they look tiny! People keep saying that that's because you're tiny but I've always seen myself as a big girl because of my breasts. I'm 5ft 3, and 131lbs.

I live on my own so this forum is going to be so important to me I think. Sure, I have good friends who will pop in but it's not quite the same when you're worried and it's midnight! So, thank you in advance.

I'm posting some photos of me now and will post some more when I'm done.

Just thought I'd update my journey through the NHS. After many years the NHS approved my surgery in February 2012. They were very good and I was thrilled that finally they had recognised that it wasn't just a cosmetic procedure, that it was necessary for my health.

It's been years since I've been able to exercise properly (not just walking) as whenever I do I hurt my neck and shoulders so much that I can't turn around.

So, I was told that I'd have about a years' wait. I was happy with that as at least I knew that it was going to happen. Unfortunately that year has turned into 18 months. They also said that they'd give me a couple of days notice and that it could be cancelled at any time.

Now, I'm self employed and have come to the conclusion that I can't mess my clients around booking time out and then cancelling it, or disappearing at short notice. So I've taken the massive financial step and decided to pay for it. It's the same surgeon, but now I know when it's happening, I can plan for my family, my clients and my colleagues who I can get in to cover my work. It's going to cost £6,500 but it will be done on my terms.

For anyone who is authorised by the NHS and who doesn't mind the wait and the uncertainty then I'm sure that's fine. I had to make a decision and I'm very happy with it! I feel better about paying (weirdly) because the NHS have said it's necessary and also I'm removing myself from the list of NHS patients who need it for cancer reconstruction.

So, I'm on my way!

OK - I've been really excited until about 5 minutes ago when a friend came to take one of my dogs to look after while I'm in hospital. I had nerves but the excitement outweighed them. Now I just feel scared and have butterflies.

I think it has become real to me which might sound stupid! I guess it's just one foot in front of the other but I'm not sure how I'm going to get through tonight and tomorrow morning!

Any advice?

Well today feels surreal! I can't quite believe that it's actually going to happen. it's been such a long journey. I'm a real mixture of emotions; excitement, scared, apprehensive, did I say excitement? Mainly I feel tired because of the emotion and not sleeping so well (excitement again I think). The butterflies in my stomach are going nuts! Oh my - here we go!

...and ready to go

7 hour op and he finished at 2am!! Shattered but so thrilled. No drains but seeping a bit. Still in hospital. Will post more soon will out a photo up too

Wow. As soon as I woke up I checked how my neck and shoulders were. I could actually turn my neck properly and when I shrug my shoulders it feels like a great weight is gone. Immediate improvement! Despite the pain which isn't as much as I thought it might be. I'll post how many grams he took but it was something like 500 from right and 400 from left so about 2lbs. Yay!

Got home yesterday and felt great. Lots of friends came around to check on me (I live on my own). Today - had a shower and washed my hair which was great. I have cling film type bandages on so I can shower but not submerge the wounds. Apparently I bled a lot during surgery and this morning I was still seeping from the wounds. Anyone have this 3 days post? Just a little concerned. I've put some absorbent lint on it and put my (now bloodied) white sports bra on and it seems ok...

Pain wise I'm coping well so far with paracetamol. Would love to got to the loo properly though!!

All in all its a great result. I still don't know what size I will be as I'm wearing a 34D sports bra very loosely as I'm a 30 back. I just hope I'm pleased with the finished size!

There's not been much to say since my last post really. Luckily it's been warm and sunny so I've been sat in the garden reading lots of books.

Painwise, I'm fine. I've stopped taking the paracetamol but still taking the antibiotic which I think runs out tomorrow. I'm still seep what I think is A LOT. Anyone else at this time post op please?

Zingers - are they like someone is poking needles in your nipples? I think that's what they are. Not so much painful as a bit itchy and catch you by surprise!

The swelling and bruising is going down a bit. I think the leftie is slightly bigger than rightie but I'll wait until it's all gone down before worrying about it.

The main thing that I've found is the lack of pain in my shoulders and neck - wow! I can turn my neck so much more and if I shrug my shoulders it feels as if they might touch the moon as there's no weight for them to lift. Amazing!

Anyway, I'll post later with a piccie and update on my post op consultation.

Well, the clingfilm like bandages came off and my PS is pleased with the progress. So am I. He's just put steri-strips on and I'm to see him again in 2 weeks. It was about a 15 minute appointment and I went away with instructions to carry on taking it easy! Happy so far except.....the itching has set in!! ;-)

Hi all, I'm having a bit of a panic. Until today things seem to have gone really well. Today my nipples seem to have lost their pink colour and look paler. Also the left nipple has a darker patch on it. While the actual nipple still has feeling, the areola around it has gone numb. Is this the start of nipple necrosis?

Well, it's been a while since my last update but really there was nothing to report.

The "nipple gate" has resolved itself. It seems that what had happened was that I was looking at the nipple when the nipple itself had been pressed into the areola by the bra - hence making the darker mark. All safe and well.

I've been healing ok. Still getting some seepage on the right side but according to my ps it's normal and "better out than in"!

Unlike some here I've had virtually no pain. A bit sore but then after major surgery (mine took 5 hours) what else can I expect and I reckon that's pretty good.

The one thing I have underestimated is the tiredness. I had to go to a family funeral about 4 hours from home. My brother came and picked me up and took me to his place which is only about 1.5 hours away from the funeral and I stayed there for a couple of days which was fine - although you never quite relax at someone elses' place do you?! Anyway, we set off to the funeral at 8.30 am as we needed to go to her house to sort a few things out, funeral at 12, home by 5pm. That was 2 days ago and the following day I could barely speak I was so tired. Back home now and shattered. I'm back to work on Monday although I've not booked amny meetings it's going to be a shock!

I'd not been doing anything until the funeral and I don't plan to do anything this weekend to recover. My advice to others - don't underestimate how tired life in general may make you feel!

Anyway, boobies are looking good. Rather sore after the full day on Wednesday but I'm still pleased with them. Photos to follow.

I saw a few girls doing this and thought it a good idea

Well, the seeping on the right side is continuing. I'm not too worried about that, but the small hole it is seeping out of is now a large one and increasingly painful. it's about an inch long now and looks angry. I'm calling my ps this morning so I'll update asap

Well the ps says that its a little infected but he's not worried, so I'm comfortable with that. My boobs are becoming much softer and feeling more like my own. They're also a bit more sore. I wonder if that's because the swelling has subsided a bit?

3 weeks post op and I've had my steri strips removed. I think the wounds look really good so I'm pleased with them. I still have a small bandage over the area which is infected. That will take a good few weeks to improve but no body seems worried about it - it's just bad luck. I hope it heals quickly. In general my boobs feel sore, not so much around the scars but all over. I guess they are bruised inside which is what it feels like. They are changing shape all the time. Some days I love them and some days I think they look a bit strange but later that day they will have changed again! All in all, despite the infection, things are going well. I'll post some more photos

For the last week they have been very sore. It's not so much around the scars, but in general. I've had a monthly as well so maybe it's something to do with that, but as I sit here now, they feel as if they've gone 7 rounds with Mike Tyson!

All going ok here. I'm seeing the nurse every 2 days at the moment as she is having to redress the wound on my right side. The infection seems to have gone which is great. I'm still very tired though!

I haven't posted in my review for a while - I've had the blues. I'm feeling a bit better now but for the last week I've really been low. I'm thrilled with my br and am not at all missing my old ones, and have no idea why I was feeling so bad. Perhaps I was over tired - don't know. Anyway, I went with it and am coming out the other side. My infection is now gone, and the hole is healing nicely. I'm still getting it dressed every couple of days. They've put no cream or anything on it and I wasn't given antibiotics - it's all very natural and is coming along nicely. Because it needs to heal from the inside out they pack it with gauze and stuff to stop it scabbing over and it's working. I'm still wearing my sports bra - can't wait to know when I can stop and buy "real" ones! I'm seeing my consultant in about a week so I've lots of questions for him.

These were taken last week - I'll post some more for the 6 week update photos on Friday

All going well. I still get very tired though. The wound is healing nicely and I don't have to get the dressing changed as often. They feel a lot softer now but they still don't quite feel like mine!