“9 weeks PO, still not flat :(”

I am 40 yrs old, have 2 young boys, ages 4 and 1 and am ready (I think) to reclaim by body. I am 5'3'' and currently weigh 132lbs...I would like to reach 125 by my surgery date. I had kids later in life (at 36 and 39) and while my tummy did bounce back after my first son, it did not after my second baby even though I gained less weight. I did 3 consultations with board certified plastic surgeons and was told I have severe diastasis and a possible hernia. This explains why I look 5 months pregnant. :(

This site is awesome and I am so glad I found it. I have the same mixed emotions as many...guilt over the decision...is this selfish when I have two young children? If I died they would be without their mother. Should I just accept my body and not take the risks? Even if I don't die from the surgery or a blood clot, I could be left disappointed if results are not what I had hoped for or even possibly disfigured if something goes wrong...all this already keeps me up at night.

Even the process of selecting a doc was not easy as they were all nice, qualified, priced within a few hundred dollars of each other, etc, etc. I am very happy with the doc I selected but you never know until it is done.

Usually I am a very confident person but I can not believe how much this whole thing has me second guessing everything...did I pick the right doc, should I wait until the kids are older, should I not do it at all????

I love reading the stories on here and gaining great advice..things I had never heard of like pineapple juice for healing, etc. I look forward to reading up on the experiences of others (and trying not to freak out over the few stories when some did not think it was worth it). Good luck to all. I will post pics later...

Updated on 14 Nov 2011:
I feel great about the PS that I selected. She just called me herself to answer a few additional questions. I had left a message with 2 final questions with her assistant and explained that I did NOT need the doc to call me back, just wanted her to ask for me and call me back whenever, as they were just general questions. Instead the doc called back to answer the questions explaining that she would prefer to answer herself rather than have a third party trying to relay answers. Wow, great service and I am still 3 months out. I had an initial consultation with her. Then saw her one more time before making my final decision and then spoke with her today. I am very impressed with her hands on approach and from all the reviews I have read about her (on other sites as well) she offers the same approach after the surgery.

I feel great about my choice and think I now need to stay away from some internet info. I have already researched to a great extent and now it is time to focus on positive stories. It is so easy to get freaked out by one or two bad stories/outcomes.

Hopefully my PS doesn't think I am a freak with all the questions I have had!! :)

Updated on 17 Nov 2011:
Can someone with small children please clarify when you were allowed to pick up for 1 yr old for things like diaper changes, putting him in and out of crib..just mild lifting. I thought it was 4-6 weeks but I just read another post and she said her doc said not to carry her one yr old for 3 months...what????
Please, someone who has been through this help me...if this is true perhaps I need to wait for this surgery.

Updated on 28 Nov 2011:
Can't believe this month is almost over. Even though I am not scheduled until Feb., I feel the time is flying by. December will pass quickly as well b/c of Christmas.

I keep having dreams, almost nightly about the surgery. Nothing spooky, so that is good, just random, oddball dreams.

I continue to be glued to this site. Thanks to all for sharing their stories, thoughts, fears, let downs, etc. It is a big help.

I have a Lazy Boy recliner that I bought when I was preggers b/c I could not get comfortable sitting anywhere. I almost sold it a few months back b/c I am done having kids and that is what I purchased it for. Good thing I held on to it as it sounds like most of you have needed one. I will not be renting a hospital bed..just simply don't feel like it. Too bulky, kind of grosses me out because they are used...I know they clean them but still...I don't know, I am a germ freak so I am going to hope the recliner is enough and husband is going to take our bed off the frame b/c we have very high, thick mattresses so if they are just on the floor, off the frame it will be easier. He did this for me for my c-secions as well and it helped.

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving and has a wonderful Christmas as well. :)

Oh ya...can't decide if I should get a flu shot. Haven't had one for years but of coarse this would not be a good year to get the flu...don't want to get sick before surgery and certainly not after as coughing would be a major bummer...hum, don't know..any thoughts out there on that one?

Updated on 4 Dec 2011:
Really on the fence about lipo of inner and outer thighs. Been reading reviews on the lipo discussions and many give it a not worth it rating due to lumpiness, hard spots, saggy skin, etc. I am getting lipo of the flanks as that is part of the tt cost with my doc but I am having doubts about the thighs as this area can be addressed with exercise unlike my seperated muscles. Anyone have experience with lipo of thights done at same time as tt?

Updated on 4 Jan 2012:
So about a month to go. Getting into a crazy nesting mode. Got an oil change today, tires rotated. Feel a need to clean the baseboards throughout the entire house. It is time and I certainly won't want to do it for several months post surgery. Want to get carpets cleaned, take son to the dentist, etc, etc, etc. The time has really flown by, with the holidays and now just one month to go. With little ones, I am always plenty busy running the household and when I start adding in crazy nesting plans, seems like barely enough time to get it all done.
My only regret is that I have not been able to go to the gym on a regular basis. My 17 month old is always sick..gets over one cold, bug, virus, only to get another so I can not take him to the child center at the gym. Hubs works a lot of hours so I would prefer to hit the gym while he is at work and it just isn't happening. I continue to be sleep deprived from taking care of little one at night..I really hope I don't get sick myself before surgery. Looking forward to getting this over with and heading to "flatland". :)

Updated on 14 Jan 2012:
I am 3 weeks away come Monday. I have my pre-op with my PS this Tuesday. I am excited but surprised that the stress of it all is overshadowing the excitement.

My biggest fears:

Death

Blood clot that could lead to death

Muscle seperation returning after good initial results...how awful to look great, only to have pooch return months later..although rare, it can happen and has happened to a few gals on this site. :(

Caring for my small children..hoping that enough healing will have occurred before I need to start lifting little one in and out of crib.

Okay, so for some positive thoughts: My husband was able to get almost the entire month of Feb off so I will have 3 weeks (Feb 6- Feb 29) of for sure not having to lift baby for anything. This was a HUGE blessing. I wish I could embrace it more and let go of all of my anxiety.

I think about praying but feels weird to pray about recovery from plastic surgery. I go to a Mops type group at church and would love to ask the ladies to pray for me but seems wrong in this time of economic struggle for so many, to ask for prayers when dropping some serious money on plastic surgery.

I feel blessed to have found this site..funny how we feel like friends with each other even though we don't know anyone on here personally. I dont even remember how I stumbled across this site..probably one of my many on line searches for reviews on docs?? who knows but what I wonderful thing.

I plan to upload my before pics on Tuesday after seeing my PS for preop appt. Someone on here said it helps to make us feel like we are making the right decision...nothing like th harsh reality of how we look in pictures to make us press on!! :) Best wishes to all.

Updated on 17 Jan 2012:
Attempting to add before pics. Saw PS today for pre-op appt. Seems so real now. I am still on the fence about thigh lipo. I will decide tonight and go in and pay in full tomorrow. Had butterflies when I went in this morning.

Updated on 19 Jan 2012:
So I paid in full today. I have been on the fence about inner/outer thigh lipo with my tt. I have changed my mind many times but today I paid for it so no turning back now.

My PS had me try on the compression garment, it is awful! Like a corset it hooks up the sides, then zips up and has a lovely pee/poop hole. I already sweat like a beast anyway so this should be fun. I can not even begin to imagine using the bathroom with this thing on..like it is really going to stay all nice and lined up so there is no mess..good luck!
I have just upped my fear factor big time and wonder if I am making a big mistake, seems it would be a lot easier to heal just from the tt.....heavy sigh...

Updated on 24 Jan 2012:
Well, I have done most of the pre planning and errands. Filled my Rx's for Percocet, Valium, Keflex, and Phenergen. Picked up the Hibicleanse soap and additional supplies. Bought extra groceries and will continue to keep everything overstocked for hubs. Don't want him to have to grocery shop with both boys in tow. Made a hair appt for 4 days before my surgery so my highlights are fresh..might be awhile before I get back in..don't want skunk head!!

I have done some super cleaning around the house, even got hubs to rechaulk our shower and managed to get all the soap scum off of the glass doors. next are the baseboards and organize office and I am done.

Have a lot of nervous energy. The dreams about surgery have come back. I was dreaming every night about it in some way right after I booked the date. Then the dreams stopped with the business of the holidays, etc. They just started back up a couple of nights ago. Nothing spooky, just something that pertains to my tt each and every night.

I am starting to look at my boys in that odd way of what if... each night in the middle of the night I have this urge to go into their rooms and squeeze them.

Hubs has a brutal schedule coming up. He works in the ER and is on for 9 out of the next 12 days..some of those shifts are night shifts...poor dear. He is doing this to have more time off after my surgery.

Wishing everyone well. Thanks to all who continue to update their progress and include new pics along the way. :)

Updated on 31 Jan 2012:
Well, I am almost there! Having all kinds of random dreams. Last night was about shaving for the last time before surgery..so much talk about ingrown hairs, waxing, etc that it must have stuck in my mind. I am not a very hairy person but in my dream I had the hairiest arm pits ever and just kept shaving them over and over! :0

Went to Costco and stocked up for hubs and the boys. Bought a lot of frozen stuff like fish sticks, chicken nuggets, meatballs for pasta, etc. Loaded up on water and vitamin water zero, larabars, apple packs. Thanks for the ideas mm9801 (can't remember the numbers in your handle??) Will get fresh fruit and veggies day before I go in.

Been taking Miralax everyday as I always have back up issues..TMI sorry! PS asked me to stop Miralax 1-2 days prior to surgery, said she doesn't want me to crap on the table..gee, why not!! Will start Miralax again the day I get home from overnight stay. Also bought MOM as I do not want to get backed up from narcs on tops of my own G.I. issues!

I go back and forth from complete excitement to complete second guessing...what the hell am I doing this for?!

Finished most of my cleaning frenzy..baseboards were so dusty..once you do it you realize too much time has passed since the last time, they look brand new!

Thanks to all who continue to update their reviews, it is nice to have an idea of what to expect! Best wishes to all! :)

Updated on 3 Feb 2012:
So today is Friday and Monday is my day. Today was my 5th wedding anniversary and I spent most of the day crying. I am scared. I did end up telling the moms in my church group and they did a group prayer for me and the tears fell. When hubs and I exchanged cards, I cried (although we got each other the exact same card...how crazy is that!!). When I read some more reviews, I cried. One of my fellow Feb tt just gave a recount of how her surgical day went and I cried, sounds scary to me. I am wishing I backed out of the thigh lipo, this made me cry.

I have dropped 2 lbs in the last 3 days b/c when I am really stressed I can't eat much. I feel sick to my stomach.

It is going to be a very long weekend. I still have a lot of chores to do and hubs has night shift tonight which means I have the kids all morning so he can sleep.

I don't feel "ready".

Updated on 5 Feb 2012:
Spent the day finishing my "spring cleaning". It kept me busy and the day went quickly. I am staying at my parents house tonight, my mom is taking me in the morning so my husband can stay with our young children (my mom has MS and can only handle my boys for a short time so it was better to leave hubs with the kiddos).
The only time I got sad today was saying goodbye to my boys and husband before leaving for my parents house.

I will probably not update until Tuesday evening...I am staying the night at hospital and never get online on my phone.

Updated on 12 Feb 2012:
Well, I thought I was a tough bird. After all, I have had 2 c-sections, breast aug (14 yrs ago) and bunion surgery on both of my feet at the same time...my feet were so jacked up they literally had to break both my feet...it was a 3 month recovery.
And much to my surprise, this recovery is kicking my ass!
I stayed the night in hospital after surgery and once cathedar was removed I was free to go as soon as I could pee on my own. That never happened..after several hours they put a cathedar in me and emptied my bladder. Finally a few hours later, I peed and was able to go home.

At home I puked standing up. I wasn't sure what to do, couldn't really knee down over the toilet bowl so I just stood in my bathroom vomititng. Great fun.

This stupid comp garment has made the entire thing so much worse and I am kicking myself daily for not just doing the tt and skipping out on the lipo of thighs. It is impossible to use the bathroom in this iron maiden. The first time I tried I managed to get urine everywhere. I am using a funnel which helps but forget about trying to poop in this thing so it is this huge ordeal of taking the damn thing off when I think I need to poop which has only been twice and not much and naturally, once I get the damn thing back on I suddenly feel like I need to crap again.

I have only done sponge baths b/c I have zero energy.

Hubs has been great but listening to him trying to juggle the kids on his own is half funny half irritating.

I move around like I am a 100 yrs old. I smell, I am bruised and overall feel like shit. If I could do this all over again, I would not...but I need to wait and see results and perhaps that will change my mind.

I am sorry for the negative feedback..in fact I have not updated b/c I haven't had anything good to say thus far. My garment is so uncomfortable that it is truely the only reason I need the valium and pain meds. I feel like I am going to explode I am so swollen. I haven't even bothered taking new pics yet but will do so next week after follow up appt with PS to see how things are going.

I read how so many others are feeling great after a few days, off the meds, have great post op pics and wonder why things just aren't unfolding like this for me?

Hoping to feel better when drains are removed and done taking the antibiotic.

Best wishes to all. :)

Updated on 15 Feb 2012:
As I have written, I did not have an easy recovery. Not that I expected easy, it was just harder than I thought. Today I had a follow up and my AWESOME PS was able to remove both drains! The incision looks great, nice and low! I am extremely swollen and bruised, even she was surprised but said all is normal. Belly button looks good. Even though I am so swollen, the look of my preggo stomach is gone. I am holding off on pics just until some swelling goes down b/c they don't really represent my progress. I also took my first real shower today with the help of my dear husband and man oh man did it feel nice to wash the stink off! :)
PS said I had a nearly 4 inch muscle seperation. Sexy!

Updated on 21 Feb 2012:
So I am 14 days PO. I am feeling a little better each day but thank God daily that my husband was able to get 3 weeks off b/c I can not imagine taking care of a 4 yr old and an 18 mo old yet!
I am not happy with pics yet. I am very swollen and feel jipped that I never got those initial flat pics right after surgery before going into swell hell...instead I got an express way ticket straight to swell hell...GRRR! The only lipo I had was to flanks and minimal on inner/outer thighs b/c I was so scared of sagging skin...amazed at the bruising, even my feet are black and blue.
Even though I think my pics suck right now, I thought it was the right thing to do to post them...I hope it helps others see we all heal at different speeds and hopefully I will have amazing pics in a couple of months to give others hope! Cheers to all! :)

Updated on 26 Feb 2012:
Well, I had my 3 week PO appt yesterday (yep, on a Saturday...my PS works 6 days a week, didn't get out of her office until 5:15 and she had 3 more peeps to see)
I had been having a really bad day yesterday, broke down in tears in her office. My last visit with her was 10 days ago and I did not feel any better, maybe even worse, swelling had not susbsided at all and might even be worse, bruising is just a tad lighter than in my 2 week PO pics. What am I doing wrong. Nothing she says. She says she is NOT alarmed but will say that I am her most swollen, most bruised patient she has ever had after a tt with minimal lipo. I feel special.
I did feel much better after seeing her just to know nothing is wrong, hard as a rock section on lower back is fine and I can begin to massage. She removed net like tape from surgery and cleaned with hydogen peroxide and replaced with paper tape. Did not hurt. She belly button looks fine. Have some hard lumps on thighs, wondered if they were hemotomas, nope..just normal lumps after lipo, should go away within 6 months.

I am walking almost completely straight, so I've got that going for me, which is nice! ;)

Same restrictions b/c of my sensitive system, only been released for walking to get things moving but she warned me I will swell but it will help in the long run.

Not going to post new pics until 1 month mark, hopefully there will be some change.

Happy Healing to all. :)

Updated on 6 Mar 2012:
Well I am just as swollen as I have always been, possibly even more. I am 127 lbs right now and my size large comp garment is skin tight. I called my PS b/c I was very concerned about my swelling. I didn't have another appt until 2 weeks from now and just couldn't wait that long...wasn't sure what was going on. She was kind enough to squeeze me in today. She assures me everything is fine and I am just someone who swelled a lot. I am so afraid these will be my final results. While I certainly look better, I still have quite a pooch (from the side view) and she says I will get smaller but I shouldn't expect to be flat as a board. This bummed me out as I thought I would be a lot flatter based on our initial consultations. She tells me to be patient and do some mild walking outdoors..the weather here in AZ is great right now and then she tells me....

Get off the realself site for 2 weeks and she was stern about it! :) She said I am comparing myself to others too much and we all heal differently and she thinks right now it is negative for me. I love this site but agreed to do so.

This will be my last post for 2 weeks here as well as under the Feb tt's. My PS wants me to spend time reading books I havent had time for etc and thinking more positive thoughts and I think she is right. Because my recovery has been slower than others, with a lot more swelling I have to agree that I am being overly critical of myself, my healing process, etc and it isn't doing me any good.

Don't get me wrong, it has nothing to do with this site and this has been a wonderful thing for me...it is my approach that is not good for me right now...just spending too much time here, when I look at others progress, while I am extremely happy for them, I am bummed it isn't unfolding that way for me.

And I have complained a lot to hubs about never having time to read book b/c the kids keep me so busy so now is a good time to get off line and open a book!

She also switched my comp garment to a regular tt one instead of the iron maiden one that goes down to knees. Hopefully this will help with my comformt level.

I want all my tt/cyber friends to know that I will continue to think of you, pray for you and hope nothing but speedy recoveries and flat bellies for all...just going to step away for awhile. Love you gals!! :)

Updated on 16 Mar 2012:
I am 6 weeks on Tuesday and have a follow up appt with my PS so we wll see what she has to say. Funny thing is that I thought my 2 weeks pics were bad and at this point, I would be thrilled for those pics again. My stomach has gotten larger instead of smaller. Maybe more swelling, I don't know. What I do know is other people's pics tend to get better with each post as the swelling goes down. I literall look 2 months pregnant instead of 5 months...not the results I was led to believe. I will post a pic after seeing my doc on Tues.

I have changed my worth it status until I see final results.

Updated on 5 Apr 2012:
I am now in the middle of gastro appts and scheduled for an abdominal ultrasound and x-rays to see if something is amiss. The gastro I saw agreed my stomach is distended and suggested a 6 week course on Diflucan to kill a possible overgrowth of yeast in the gut. He said this is more common than people know and he has has good results when he has Rxed this treatment to patients.
Even my own PS has stated my results are not good. While it is an improvement, she has no clue why my stomach still pouches out so much. I am very disappointed as I was told I was a great candidate for the surgery. I am also disappointed in the aftercare. I admit, if I were happy with results, I would think my doc was awesome, b/c she is there for the standard aftercare BUT when something has turned out poorly, I do not feel any effort on her part to get to the bottom of what went wrong. She doesn't even have an ultrasound machine in her office so I have to go elsewhere and pay for the exam. I think PS make enough money that they should have one in house. Just my opinion on that. Her receptionist, more like gatekeeper has made me feel a little high maintainance and it is difficult to get her to schedule any extra appts. I feel like a paid a shit load of money so if I want to be seen, I should be. Not talking about trying to see her all the time, I came in ONE time in addition to the standard follow ups and it was like pulling teeth to get her to schedule the appt. My belly button is also very poorly done, but really, it is the least of my problems so I don't know if I will even bother with asking her to do a revision later.
So right now I am in limbo with the gastro appt's. I may even see another PS for a second opinion on my stomach. It is a shame I have to seek another PS because mine really hasn't taken the time to discuss the matter. Just said she agress that it isn't a good result and suggested I try a gluten free diet, ah, whatever.
I will say that my incision is nice but I would rather have a flat stomach and a jacked up incision vs a nice incision and a huge pouch! :(

Updated on 5 Apr 2012:
The system is not letting me correct my doc rating. Trying to leave 4 stars overall. Bedside manner is great. Wanted to change after care to 3 stars.

Updated on 10 Apr 2012:
I wanted to clarify that my disappointment is not a matter of me being unwilling to ride out the swelling. My own PS has said my abdominal distention is NOT due to swelling. While I do look better, I am still severely disproportioned. I need a size 8 to fit my stomach and a size 4 for my lower body so pants look terrible on me.

I just completed abdominal x-rays and an ultrasound as ordered by my gastro and am waiting to see if there is a GI problem.

I will post updated pics soon.