Transforming and building a love for myself - Riverside, CA

When I was born, they didn't expect me to live because I was born 28 weeks early. Born at 2lbs 6oz. I refused to give up, thus, I was dubbed as "The Miracle Child". Today, you would see me now and you wouldn't have guessed it! I wouldn't have either. ;D In fact, you'd do a triple take and perhaps break your neck because of my ginormous breasts and tiny frame. They might as well have their own gravitational force!!! As I was growing up, I remained quite skinny, and rather healthy until something in my genes just suddenly decided to explode into a frenzy of changes. I didn't start developing breasts until as early as the 4th grade. One day while we were all in line to go into class, I can remember clearly this girl obnoxiously announced to the whole class that I was wearing a bra! I WAS MORTIFIED! That's not something they should know! I then became self conscious and noticed that I started to become a little thicker.... I'vent been "skinny" since a child.
Presently, I'm not a terribly heavy person, yet believe that I was cursed with such the least desirable body shape, the apple. o.o DUN..DUN DUUUN!!! *thunder~thunder~lightning* For all you apple shaped women out there, you know exactly what I mean. -_- IT'S HORRID! So my breasts didn't fully develop until I was in my summer years of middle school entering the 8th grade, they just...kinda came out of no where. And everyone noticed. Gee what a splendid surprise! Anywho! Yes, apple shaped, I am very very top heavy and I tend to carry most fat in my midsection..everything else seems to be toned. I am 5"4/5"5 I believe and weigh 186. My breasts grew through out high school and I am currently studying in college. Through out high school I was always confused to be an older age than what I was, (and still am), and my friends called me silly names like; tankers, torpedoes, you get the idea. Oh boy does college get worse! I've been called; [RS bleep] McGee, Big [RS bleep], Tatas, [RS bleep] Monster, Godzilla [RS bleep]...ugh but the best I've ever been called was a "Goddess", hum, I can't deny that!
It took me a while to muster up the guts to post here, but I figured, "Hey why not, there are girls my age, (20 going on 21) who really need help and inspiration! There aren't many girls my age that post a lot of pictures of themselves in a personal perspective, and it just might help them." I hope so.
I went through HELL and back just to get approved and approved again, to find the right doctor and so on to get this surgery. There is no turning back now and I am so, so, excited!! I've met with my surgeon twice already, Dr. Ben Childers, and from what I can tell, he is a splendid and exceptional man and very talented in his work. I felt very comfortable with him, but on the contrary, my previous GP my insurance gave me was not so great and I was displeased with his work. So here I am now, waiting, tallying off the days till the 11th. There is no turning back now, and I am ready to see a new me. I'll be able to finally wear the things I want to wear, and look even more amazing.

Well today is the big day! I am so excited, yet nervous all in one!! Yesterday felt like a dream, but it feels even more dream like today hehe... Bah, if only I could have a nice meal to calm my nerves. ;D S0 it is 6:16 and I go in at 8..omg!

I am taking everything one step at a time and trying not to move too much. Yesterday they gave me a lot of pain medicine and my pain was from a 5-8. The team took care of me very well and I couldn't ask for a better team. Once I got home, I was feeling so nauseous a dizzy finally threw up once I was going to bed lol. Right now I am very sore in my neck and in my back, and of course everywhere else. Very uncomfortable....been sleeping for almost 20 hours. :/ (I'll post photos when I am feeling a bit better). Saw my doc today, everything looks fine, and the next time I will meet with him is next Friday.