So Ready to Do This!!! Want to Be Free, Light and Natural! - Portland, Oregon

A HUGE thank you to all of the brave women who...

A HUGE thank you to all of the brave women who have shared their stories on this site. Your reviews have helped me to actively move forward with getting my implants removed, even though I've been thinking about it for years.

I got my 350cc implants (under the muscle) 6 years ago right after I had my second child. I had my kids right in a row, so I went from being pregnant to nursing, to being pregnant again, to nursing again. I was an A cup, but with pregnancy/nursing, I grew to a beautiful B. I loved my breasts this size. Once I weaned my second son, for the first time in 2 years, I saw my little breasts again, and was unhappy. I thought breast implants were the answer and had the procedure done despite everyone around me telling me not to and that I didn't need it (sister, friends, husband). I thought I knew better. I asked for a "big B" and said I wanted to look as natural as possible. I ended up with 350 High Profile Saline implants and the change was dramatic. I am tall and thin, but had these perky and quite large (big C) breasts. I was embarrassed by them almost immediately, but thought I'd get used to it with time.

I am a fitness instructor and discovered right away, the awful feeling (and appearance) of when I would flex my pec muscles (in a push-up for example). My breasts would pull apart and distort. I absolutely hated the way this felt and was embarrassed by how it looked. The other thing that bothered me was, because I had high profile implants, they were spaced wider on my chest and I did not have much cleavage. It looked unnatural! Fake, like two baseballs under my shirt.

After about two years I did some research on ways to fix the problems, and I thought about explanting, but, at the time, I believed my results would be horrible, so I ended up having an implant exchange. My new doctor swapped saline for silicone and told me with a wider implant, I would have cleavage. He also cleaned up scar tissue saying my breasts would no longer distort with exercise. I now have 350cc (still under the muscle) moderate profile implants. Long story short, I still hate them. Yes, I have cleavage, but they look so WRONG on my body. They still distort, too!

I feel like a fool for thinking (not just once but TWICE!) that implants would be the answer. They are most certainly NOT. I am a healthy and active person and I have realized that these implants do not mesh with who I am. I want to be free of these weights that I have been carrying around on my chest. I want to be able to hug my children and not feel like there is something between us. I want to have the lean and sleek body that I was born with, and that my husband loved so much. But most of all, I want to move into the next chapter in my life...implant FREE!!!

I had my first consult today and it almost made me upset to the point of crying when both the nurse and the doctor spoke to me about exchanging the implants for a smaller size, or to go above the muscle instead. It took so much courage for me to get there and say (with all my heart), "I want these out, they are not for me" and to have the response be anything but supportive. It was disappointing. I have another consult (different PS) scheduled for next week.

My goal is to have the procedure done in late November or December... I am so ready for this!!! Looking forward to being on the other side!!!
I think you will look great without the implants!! Now to find a doctor who will listen to you! Stick to your guns. Can't wait to see your "post" pictures!
Thank you and ME TOO, I miss my little boobies :) It's going to feel so good to be natural again!
I am so sure you had a sense of empowerment when you said those words "they are not for me" it takes a lot of courage to love our own bodies as they were meant to be, im sure when youre on the other side you will feel it was the best decision ever made, i dont think i have came across someone saying explant wasnt worth it. Everyones regret comes from initially getting them, i wish you the best and please explant with someone that understands you and has your best interest at heart. A ps who will listen to your story, I know my ps listened to me for about 2 hrs and she made me feel the most comfortable. Good luck on your next consult.

Second Consult MUCH better!

I had my second consult this week and it was great! Dr. Gabriel and his staff were sensitive, caring and took their time with me (I think I was there for over an hour!). Dr. Gabriel also was meticulous about planning my surgery, as well as giving me hope for nice results. All in all, I felt cared for and supported, which was exactly what I wanted.

I hope to schedule my surgery for mid-December so that I can recover and take time off over the Christmas Holiday.

Thank you to everyone on this site for your kindness and support on my journey to being free of these implants! I feel a sense of relief having found such a wonderful surgeon, and now I am feeling even more ready to move forward.

Best wishes to all of you!!!

I'm glad your second consultation went well!

I'm excited for you. I explanted 10 days ago and can't stop looking in the mirror and smiling. I did a lift at the same time, so I'm still recovering, but if you just do the explant, I think it should be a breeze. In that case, doing it over the Christmas holidays is probably a great idea. Just remember, if you do general anesthesia, you likely won't remember much about the first 2 days. You also won't be able to pick up your kids or have them climb on your torso for about a week. Just in case you are interested, some women do this under local anesthesia...just a thought. CONGRATS on finding Dr. Gabriel and I second the "can't wait to see your post" pix!!
I can't wait to be 10 days post op and smiling :)! I did consider having just local anesthesia, but Dr. Gabriel needs to repair scar tissue and reattach the muscle, so I will have to be totally out. I am scheduling for mid-December!!! Thanks for your support! I will keep you posted :)

Explant Scheduled! December 19th!!!

I felt a huge sense of relief setting my appointment for explant this week. I also was able to secure about 2 weeks off work to heal and recover. It will be December 19th!! I know it's about a month and a 1/2 away, but I am hoping that time flies until then.

I feel so happy that I have gotten through the initial steps of having consults, finding the right surgeon, and setting a date. To me, those were the most difficult, not to mention, telling my husband about how I have been feeling and that I want to remove my implants. But now all this is done, I am feeling this huge sense of relief...and all I have to do now is wait and prepare myself emotionally and mentally.

I am sure I will start to get nervous as the date approaches (going under anesthesia, worrying about the results etc.), but I know in my heart that I am making the right decision. And I still feel so ready to move on past this chapter in my life.

Feeling hopeful today!!!
Good for you.. sounds like you've found the right PS which is the most important part. I had such a hard time scheduling mine, and had to wait for my date but it flew by and now its just 3 days away! Can't wait to have it done, but yes as it gets closer I am feeling some nerves about it! This site has been so helpful to me!!
Good luck tomorrow! I hope everything goes smoothly. Keep us posted on how you are doing!!
Congrats! You're gonna go right back to better-than-your-pre-BA-self in just a few months

Worried about Muscle Distortion after Explant

Overall I have not had any major complications with my implants, but I do have horrible muscle distortion when my chest muscles contract. I have searched the internet for photos of other who experience this, but NONE compare to how awful and extreme mine is. My breast pull up and apart and invert at the nipple. It looks like a horror movie, no joke. And it happens with even the slightest movement, cutting vegetables (if I had a cleavage shirt on, you could see it happen if you were looking), opening doors, driving, pushing myself up from a lying position and, most obviously, with push-ups (where even wearing a tight tank top and sports bra an observer could see the deformed breast fold in half from the side). I am too embarrassed to even post a picture on's that bad.

But my question is to those who have had any kind of distortion with implants, if that continues to happen after removal. My doctor knows this is a concern of mine and is going to attempt a muscle repair (tacking down the muscle), but I am terrified that I will mess it up during recovery when I "accidentally" use my pectoral muscle (getting out of bed for example). And I am also worried that the repair just won't work, and I will be left deformed every time I move.

Does anyone have any thoughts on this??
I am thinking of you! You are getting so close now, and I am sure you and Dr Gabriel will both do fantastic! Regarding unders/muscle distortion... Once you have cosmetic surgery, the reality is that you can never go back to exactly your pre-implant natural boobs. The definition of cosmetic surgery (as opposed to reconstructive surgery) is to take normal/healthy body parts and surgically change them. Reconstructive surgery is taking damaged body parts and attempting to repair them back to normal/healthy. Once you get cosmetic surgery of the breast, anything after is "reconstructive". Overs v unders... I had overs, so did many girls. We have no muscle distortion, but we have a lot more tissue damage (from pressure/weight of implants) to the breast mound and resulting nipple/areola caving. Once you take nice, normal, healthy breasts and chop them open and shove big sacs of fluid in there - the damage has been done - overs/unders just means different locations of implant caused tissue damage. There will be some aftermath either way, overs or unders. 2 things I can confidently say are 1. Dr Gabriel is an expert at breast reconstructive surgery. If anyone can give you a great chance at a beautiful and functional muscle repair, he will do it. 2. The body and time heals. I am 9 months out and still healing subtly. Can we ever have our exact pre-implant boobs back? Unfortunately, no. But we can heal, we can repair, we can go back to a very normal and beautiful condition. I feel my breasts truly look "normal" now, except for scars I don't look like I ever had implants. Have high hopes, but realistic expectations. Part of this process is accepting that not every aspect of the original decision to implant can be undone. All of us struggle with that. It's a beautiful place to get over to the other side - rest up and I wish you a safe, uneventful explant surgery!
Thank you for your detailed review. I get my implants out on 21st December and I'm excited but nervous at the same times especially since friends and family have questioned my decision - they think my implants look great. But like you I no in my heart I want v then out (only hope I don't regret it). Everyone one on this site that I've looked at, look so much better at ex plant. I'm sure you'll be fine and I'll be thinking of you on 19th. Good luck and I'll look forward to seeing your explant pics x
Thank you for your support! I agree, seeing the positive results and hearing the happy women on this site makes me feel more confident in the decision to explant. I am sure you will be thrilled with your decision. I really haven't told anyone that I am removing them (except my husband) because I know many would try and convince me to keep them. But I know in my heart, that implants are simply not for me and I know that my decision is the right one. You have to go with your gut!!! Good luck with your surgery and keep in touch. Since our surgeries are two days apart (mine on 19th), we will be healing together :)

Three More Days!!!

Well, I am starting to get nervous. My surgery is just three days away! I know that I am making the right choice, hands down, but honestly, I feel more nervous now than I did when I got the implants. I think it's because I don't know what the results will be and I am afraid my breasts could look bad or weird or misshapen. I am also getting nervous about anesthesia.....eeek. I am a worry wort :)

But I would not even be doing this if it weren't for the stories and support from all the women on this site. So thank you again for sharing and understanding like no one else can!!! Wish me luck!!!
You are going to look amazing...proportional again, beautiful, and amazing!
Thank you, I needed that confidence booster the day before surgery :)
In a couple of days you'll be on the other side of this and won't look back. I'm excited for you! As for the muscle distortion. I did have it when I had implants and I notice that my pecks still raise up the tissue slightly, but honestly now that there isn't any firm hard bags inside me the amount of distortion is hardly noticeable with my own natural tissue. Meaning, it's still there but to a much much smaller degree and it doesn't bother me. I'm not sure if with time it gets better or not, but it takes a long time to heal so time will tell.

Explant Done!!!! Yay!!!

Everything went very smoothly with my surgery today. I got to the surgery center at 6am, had surgery at 7:30 and then was on my way home before 11. Dr. Gabriel was wonderful and even though I was nervous, he made me feel at ease.

I have drains in and the doctor says they may need to stay in for a week or more. That isn't great, but I can manage. As soon as I started waking up after surgery, the first thing I did was touch my breasts (albeit it was over the bandage), and I immediately started to cry! I felt like ME again and it was an indescribable feeling of freedom.

I am definitely sore and have had to stay on pain meds throughout the day. The doctor sutured my muscle quite a bit and warned me that that would lead to more pain than normal. So, most of the day I have been resting in bed (next to my 8 year old who was sick today and home from school today :)

Just now I emptied my drains and took a quick peek at my breasts under the bandage and my first few thoughts are: whoa very very flat (even more than my pre-surgery body), but I am pleasantly surprised that they don't look like wrinkly empty balloons. I was expecting them to look more deflated with the skin having been stretched so much. I did notice that my left breast seems indented below the nipple, and I am not sure what that is about. My recheck is in the morning, so hopefully Dr. Gabriel can explain that.

I will post some pictures tomorrow. Thanks to all of you amazing women for your caring hearts and support!
I love that you were so happy you cried
Congrats!! Happy healing, please update us with the muscle distortion, I still have mine at 2mths post op they say after 9mths it begins to settle, I'm really hoping for this. The women who are a year out do not respond as to wether the muscle is still uncomfortable so I guess only time will tell.
Congratulations. I had my explant last Saturday and my right boob was indented under the nipple but that's already disappeared so I'm sure yours will over the next couple of days. Take it easy and I'll look forward to seeing your explant pics x

3 Days Post-Op

Hello Ladies! I apologize to not have gotten an update on here sooner, but I have been resting a ton! I am doing well overall, just a bit constipated ugh! I stopped the pain pills today, so hopefully that helps. I don't have much pain, just feel tightly bound in this wrap, plus the awkwardness of the drains. The drains will come out tomorrow. I took a shower yesterday and snapped some pictures. The left breast in the photo has a definite indentation/puckering that has been there since surgery (both have it actually, but it's more distinct in the leftie). Does anyone know why this happens and how long it takes to release? Other than that weird crease, I do like my breasts and I am happy with the outcome. I know that I need to be patient and I will try to remember that.
I will post more pics after I am drain-free tomorrow.

Drains Out, Trying to Remain Hopeful

I got my drains out this afternoon (OUCH!). That hurt a lot, but now that they are out, I can stop wearing the tightly binding tube top. They told me to wear a tight sports bra or tank at least until my next post-op appointment next week.

So I still have indents under my nipples across the inner part of the breast. Not pretty. The doctor said not to worry and that we may have to wait for the internal sutures to dissolve (4-6 weeks) to see if that tissue will release. I will start massaging next week, which may help too. And my breasts definitely are not super soft yet, there are hard lumps near the incision (especially the leftie), which are tender to the touch.

Have any of you ladies had hard, painful lumps (scar tissue?) and/or indentations or puckering of the breast? And if you have, how long has it taken to dissipate (or did it?)? I am so anxious to hear a success story or two to ease my mind. I am going to look back into the archives tonight and see if I can find anyone with results like mine.

I am still working on remaining patient and hopeful :)
I had crease (underbreast) incisions - yes they were hard and lumpy for weeks, as the internal sutures dissolve the incisions smooth out and soften. I think a lot of women who have areola incision get this type of faint "denting" that goes away with time, and I do think it has to do with the internal sutures. When you have crease incision the lumpy/bumpy/dented state of the fresh incisions aren't as alarming because you don't see it as much - but the area is definitely not "normal" and smooth for quite some time until its healed. Give yourself some time, I think you look fantastic and will end up very similar to your pre-implant boobs! Congratulations and make sure to rest and pamper yourself.
I'm sorry that you are experiencing the same thing as me, its so frustrating, I massage twice a day w/bio oil but its still very hard underneath from all the scar tissue, ps say that scar tissue softens after 1yr, not sure wether to believe it. I have seen lil improvement in the areola, when I bend down its a different view. My advice though from what I have seen is to not get it revised. Please correct me if I'm wrong but it seens your incision was done under the areola. If you check Reed69 she advises not to revise. I can tell you this though, it gets easier as time goes by, I pay less attention to it, I dont cry about it like I used to.
Thanks for the advice. I will definitely be massaging as soon as I am allowed (next week). And I plan to wait it out for a long while to see how my body heals, so I am not looking to jump back into another revision. I think that positive thoughts and visualizing my body changing back to where it was pre-surgery can help. Mentally I want to stay strong and positive because I have come so far. And so have you!!!! You are far better off now, even despite the scars. Compared to all those girls out there asking "what cc do you have? I want some like that!", you are so much wiser!!! You understand the value of a healthy and natural body. I know our journeys are not always smooth, and our breasts may never be perfect, but every bump along the way helps us grow :) Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones!!

One Week Update

One Week Update

oops posted too soon that last one...
Feeling better every day as far as being able to use my arms, lift them overhead and drive. I also have very little movement with my pec muscle which is such a relief! Not that I have really pushed it, no push-ups or anything LOL. But previously I had movement with EVERYTHING, from opening doors to wiping down the counter. So I am quite happy with the muscle repair.

What I am having difficulty with (and, again, I am trying to be patient) is with the puckering of the left breast. It truly feels like the skin is being pulled in and is attached to something (scar tissue?). It seems like it hasn't changed at all since last week. The doctor said that it may take 4-6 weeks (for as long as it takes for the internal sutures to dissolve) to get better. But I just really need some reassurance from any ladies who have any experience with anything similar. I am scared that I am deformed now :(

There is also a bit of puckering at both the nipple incisions. I still have steri-strips in place. Does this get better once they are removed?

I feel happy (free, energetic and light!), but at the same time, disappointed. I wanted to feel such joy with my decision, and because my results are not ideal, I feel let down. I wasn't expecting this road to be easy, and I certainly did not expect my breasts to look great right after surgery, but I can't help feeling worried about whether this might not ever improve and I will be left looking like this forever.

Feeling down.
Hey vega, how is your healing going? I hope you are well.
Hi there! How are you feeling today? I enjoyed reading your story and am sending healing vibes your way.
I still have scar tissue hardness at 10 weeks. But I'm SO HAPPY and there are tons of success stories on here
Vancouver Plastic Surgeon

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