Explant on 8/22- TERRIFIED of Going Under Again - Orlando, FL

Hi! I'm new to the board! I had implants put in...

Hi! I'm new to the board! I had implants put in June 9th 2012....that's right only 2.5 months and I never liked the size from the beginning. I have 300 cc's under the muscle (silicone). I told the doc I wanted to be a B cup and I'm almost a 32D (depending on the bra). I'm 5'2 100lbs a size 0 in clothing. So these implants are extremely big for me.

Aside from me not liking the size, I've been having a lot of trouble breathing AFTER this surgery was performed. I've had 2 EKG's done and a stress test. All came out negative and my surgeon insists this has nothing to do with the implants. Well the thing is that I'm 34 years old and very acvtive. I never had any breathing issues before UNTIL I had these implants put in place. Therefore I feel they are contributing to my inability to inhale properly. It feels like my air just can't get through. As if my passages are swollen or someone is sitting on me preventing me from breathing. So they're coming out. I'm terrified as I just found out today I have to be put completely under again. I thought it would be done under local but I guess not.

I am thankful my surgeon is even doing this only at the cost of anesthesia. It's very nice of him to do this. I'm over the amount of money I spent to get them in. That money is gone forever and I'll just have to work super hard to get it back. I just want to put all this behind me and be happy and BREATHE again.

I'm one day post op. There was much less anestesia...

I'm one day post op. There was much less anestesia used this time. Last time (for the augmentation) I was out for like 2 days post op. This time I was up and walked out of the doctor's office. Once I got home I started to feel horrible pain around the stitches. I had to start taking my meds, which I hardly used last time. I've gotten up a few times to avoid blood clots. My chest feels strange. It hurts a little and deep breathes cause discomfort. However I was told they're very important to avoid sickness. My breasts are wrapped up in a huge bandage, so I have no idea what they look like. However I was instantly happy to know they were out and I was small again. Taking the medication as prescribed I feel sleepy. I'm not allowed to move my arms for 2 weeks, so I'm pretty much just laying in bed. The doctor did not have to put the drain for fluid. I guess since I only had them for 2.5 months I didn't need it.

Ok guys. I have uploaded pics of before...

Ok guys. I have uploaded pics of before augmentation, augmentation (for 2.5months) and one photo of post but I'm still wrapped up like a mummy. Remember I'm a tiny girl at 5'1/98lbs

5 days post op. No more pain killers. I stopped...

5 days post op. No more pain killers. I stopped them a few days ago. Still on antibiotic though. About 2 hours ago my stitches started bothering me (the left breast area) they itch. I still have some kind of strip over them. I had hubby look at them and he says they don't look different. I have some blood (just a little) from the first few days. I have my first post op appt tomorrow.

First post-op visit today. The doc says they're...

First post-op visit today. The doc says they're healing well. My stitches will remain for another week. I aske if I could wear a sports bra and he said it was ok.

I'm a little down. My breasts look so small now. I was a 32A before now I just look like I have nothing. Remember I just had these in for 2.5 months... So I remember what my breasts looked like before. They are also very jello type. They're not firm. :(

8 days post-op. I just finished my last antibiotic...

8 days post-op. I just finished my last antibiotic YAY!!! Those things are so nasty! I put a question on a forum asking when will my breasts firm up. I'm hoping a doctor will answer with some information. I had one doctor answer but he thinks I had my implants for 3 years when I said 2.5 months.

Tomorrow I'm starting a desk job. Going back to combat will have to wait 5 weeks. Combat requires me to wear a bullet proof vest and go hands on with people. So I need to make sure I'm strong enough to fight for my life.

I feel ok physically. I've been just sleeping and resting. Hubby has done all the cleaning and cooking. I just want my body to go back to normal. I want to shower and scrub. I have to go sit at an office and I'm wearing a body wrap! Dear Lord help me get through this.

9 days post op. I started work today in the office...

9 days post op. I started work today in the office. I did a 13 hour shift. Omg what a long day. Last night I started to feel weird. Like my chest was just strange. I got up in the middle of the night and everything. I kept feeling it at work. Almost like heartburn and it travels to my back. I'm hoping it's just part of the healing process.

I cried tonight when I saw my breast. I can't believe this entire ordeal has happened to me. 2 surgeries in less than 3 months... $5,000 lost and now my health may be at risk. I also have a job interview which will require a very difficult physical test with the Feds. I may have screwed up my chance at that.

I just ask God to give me strength and help me get through this. To just heal me and let me be healthy again.

12 days post-op. I asked a question on this site...

12 days post-op. I asked a question on this site to find out if my skin would firm up or I'd it will always feel like jello. Today one doctor said probably not! I'm sad :( I seriously thought that my body would try to bounce back. I had implants for 2.5 months. But I'm trying not to get upset. He the first doc to say probably not. Everyone else has mentioned it takes time, giving me hope. I started putting vitamin E on my breasts and soon will begin taking flex seed. 3 more days and my stitches come off.

15 days post op. Stitches came out today OMG did...

15 days post op. Stitches came out today OMG did it hurt! I don't know what happened but they were pretty stuck in there. To be honest my breasts look a lot like they did before. They're just not firm I describe it as Jello. But the docto says they'll get firmer. I'm going to order some Flex seed capsules and I've putting vitamin E on my breasts. I will remain on desk duty at least until Oct 18th.

21 days post op. I saw my cardiologist today and...

21 days post op. I saw my cardiologist today and got the results from my heart sonogram. I am super good. At 34 there was no reason for me to be experiencing chest trouble. So my doctor concludes my small frame probably didn't appreciate the pressure of 300 ccs. He asked me if I got a refund lol. I told him I was hoping the doc would have considered it but I wasn't that lucky.

In other news when I had the implants another thing that bothered me was the weird feeling at the bottom of the breasts. It wasn't numbness, but just a very weird non pleasant feeling. I touched my breasts today and that feeling is almost totally gone. I'm not feeling 100% like my old self but I'm almost there.

My breasts don't look too bad. My scar concerns me a little. But I guess only time will tell.

It's been 4 weeks since my explant. I've been...

It's been 4 weeks since my explant. I've been taking vitamin E and flax seed vitamins. I feel my breasts are 80% back to normal. I do have some stretch marks I didn't have before. It's obvious my implants were too large for my body.

Yesterday a friend of my sisters told me she's getting implants next week. I couldn't help to feel scared for her. I wished when I was thinking about implants, a fellow implanter would've warned me. It's hard to listen to people who have never had them done. I found no one to talk to who had them done and had problems. That I believe would have changed my mind. I told her if I could go back in time I would punch myself and knock this Idea out of my head lol. She went on to say how it sucks that I lost $5K. It's almost as if she was trying to put me down. But it didn't work. I chose health over looks. It was a no brainer. Should I look hot w big boobs or not breathe properly? Duh!!!

I want to start working out again. I have a federal test coming up and I want to pass. I will post pics tonight when hubby takes them.

Well ladies, last night I decided to put on a...

Well ladies, last night I decided to put on a bathing suit I purchased after the explant. I had to exchange the bathing suit I purchased for my implants and Victoria Secret was having a sale. I was able to score this 2 piece suit for $20. It's a regular push up bathing suit, not the one that adds 2 cups or anything like that. I waited and waited to put it on because I was afraid of the outcome. Well, I was pleasantly surprised! See the pic!!!!

My healing has been going very well. I feel...

My healing has been going very well. I feel excellent and my breathing is normal! I can't help but feel angry at my doctor for choosing such a large implant for a tiny girl like me. The more and more I ask people what size they had, even bigger girls than me had smaller implants. I did not know better and totally trusted his judgement that he would make me a B cup. In turn I end up being a D cup, unable to breathe and feeling horrible. So I was thinking today about writting a letter to my surgeon. Just expressing what I feel in hopes that if he gets another patient as small as me, he's cautious about the size. He doesn't think my breathing was related to the implants, but it obviously was since I've had no problems since they were removed. What do you gals think? Should I write him a letter?

I broke down last night. I can't believe I didn't...

I broke down last night. I can't believe I didn't fight harder at the beginning and trusted the surgeon. I cried and cried because I will never know if 150cc's would've been the right choice for my tiny body. Furthermore, he made his money, I lost it all! I gained nothing but pain and suffering + scars and stretch marks. My husband has been so great and supportive. Gosh I pray to God we die old together because without him I would be in a home for the crazy. So I'm going to write my doctor a letter, lettiing him know there was a correlation between my implants and my breathing problems. Also to please be more cautious when choosing implant sizes for 00 size females. 300cc's are NOT a size B cup, which is what I asked for. I will wait to do the letter until after my last follow up, which is next week.

Today my right breast is hurting for some reason. I haven't been working out or nothing so I don't know what it could be.

Well, I had my last follow up Tuesday 10/16. I...

Well, I had my last follow up Tuesday 10/16. I would say the entire appt was all of 2 mins long? The doc looked at my breasts touched them for 2 seconds and said "call us if you need us." I felt he didn't care. He didn't say "oh they're looking great" or anything like that. Although my breats look just like before they did pre-surgery, when I lay down I can see a big difference. Because there is no firmness, they just fall like jello to the side. I don't know if this will get better. I wish I could find someone who's had them removed 1 year ago and speak with them. I am getting a little depressed. I'm just feeling ugly everywhere.

Its been a while...I started doing push ups. Today...

Its been a while...I started doing push ups. Today my breasts hurt. I don't know if its from working out or maybe my period is on its way. I shall wait a few days and see.

Hi everyone. I've been gone for the holidays. My...

Hi everyone. I've been gone for the holidays. My breasts feel fine. They are more sensitive than they were before. I treat them with such kindness. My nipples are very sensitive. At least I didn't loose sensation. I can't complain with the way they look considering what I've done to my body. I really wish someone would have slapped me and stopped me before doing this. I don't know how long it will take me to recover emotionally from this. But I'm happy I don't feel this pressure on me and I can breathe. I'm happy to feel the bottom of my breasts and I'm happy to be natural.

Well, My doctor has not and probably will not...

Well, My doctor has not and probably will not respond to my letter. In the mean time I keep learning to cope with the decision to have put these bombs inside me. I just thank God for giving me an early sign before keeping them in too long. I'm not looking too bad. I'm not gonna lie, I avoid the mirror in the nude at all costs. But with clothing on, I feel pretty confident in myself. I'm not too bad! These pics I'm posting today are for you ladies. There is life after explant. We are beautiful from the inside. Boobs do not make us women. The tough decisions we make in life, the carrying of a child and bouncing back, the love we have for others...that's what makes us women.

OMG Ladies...its been months since I had these...

OMG Ladies...its been months since I had these implants removed. 8.5 months ago and the other day my chest felt just like when I had the implants. All of a sudden trouble breathing again. The TERROR! Why??? WHY is this feeling back? I've been fine for over 8 months. Maybe its God telling me not to think about these implants ever again? Because I'll be honest, I think about them. I think about what if I had just gotten 175CC's. :-(

Scar Tissue?

Hi Ladies. I have a question. Anyone ever heard of scar tissue developing after explant? Today my breasts started to hurt and I feel a lump. I'm trying not to freak out. I'm just curious if scar tissue would be a possibility.

Hello everyone

It's been a long time since I've posted...a long time since my implant and explant. I have to admit I keep wishing I had bigger breasts and even still think, will 150cc's be the right choice for me? Looking at my implant photos I remember now how digusted I thought I looked and didn't even want to look in the mirror.

Today I cope with the decision to have implants. The damage this has done to my body. Although I've healed copletely, I feel my breasts are not the same. They are extremely sensitive to touch. I also feel I lost firmness. Not too much but noticeable to me. We are own worst critics and while on the outside everyone thinks I have big breasts due to push up bras, on the inside I hide what I've done to myself.
Trevisani

5 out of 5 stars Overall rating
5 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
5 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
5 out of 5 stars After care follow-up
5 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
5 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
5 out of 5 stars Staff professionalism & courtesy
5 out of 5 stars Payment process
5 out of 5 stars Wait times
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Hi. I thought your breasts looked very nice and not big at all. I got 175 cc texture silicone and I wish they were bigger. I can say I had fuller breasts naturally when in my 20's and so I was used to having some breasts comparing to my tiny frame. When I was pregnant and breastfeeding they got even bigger and it did not bother me at all. I do not know what to tell you, I think you did not wait enough for the implants to settle and get normal and soft. I felt them so hard and heavy for some months and took them a long time to settle. At first when i saw them I freaked out because I thought they were huge but it was the swelling and that lasted for many months. And mine are overs which means less time to settle. Why didn't you do overs? You had more breast tissue than me. Anyway, I do not want to make feel that you did not do the right thing, everybody is different. I felt so bad about my deflated breasts for more than 10 years and after I had them done I wish I hadn't waited for that long. I have not had any problems that did not have before surgery regarding the implants and not the cancer treatments and other lymph surgery. I remember though that the first 4-5 days and until the bandage came off I was having panic attacks all the time, I felt awful and depressed because of the discomfort. That thing was so tight I could not breath. The only thing girls out there should consider is that they should have them done after they are done breastfeeding because that is when you get depressed. Have you thought that your breathing problem is panic attacks? I have had them for years and let me tell you they just came like that and lasted from 15 minutes to 45. You feel like you cannot breath at all and after it is over you feel fine. Do you have something like that? Of course, over the years I developed other panic symptoms much worse than the breathing thing. I think you might have experienced a panic attack because you felt bad about your breasts and your decision to have them and upset about your doctor and guilty for whatever issue, I do not know. I have just learned a lot over the years dealing with my problem and having seen so many psychiatrists and read about psychology. Write me your comments, please, and tell me how you are feeling now. Do you still have the breathing problem?
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Thank you for sharing your story. I want to have my implants out also, since I am also a tiny girl (not quite as tiny as you, but pretty small), and my doctor put in 400cc, even though I asked for SUBTLE! Then after six months, he agreed to change them to 300ccs.... still too big!!! Now I just want them out. And I'm wondering, should I get them out, or get them out and lifted at the same time, if that's an option. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that your breasts look absolutely perfect!! You are right -- we are always our own worst critic, and we fail to see the beauty, and quick to see the imperfections. But honestly, believe me, your breasts after the explant are just lovely, with or without clothes. Can I have them? LOL? No really, I only hope mine turn out as beautiful once these things are taken out of me. Geez... what was I thinking??
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Hey missus. Long time no speak. It's a harsh lesson we've all had but you seriously look fantastic. How's work? Did you go for the other job? X
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I have declined the federal job. My offer was in PR and I really can't move there. My husband has a career here so moving there would not work for him. Big language barrier for him. I did just accept a job at a local police dept. I left the sheriffs office after 6 years in search of better benefits and pay. It was a tough decision but I was blessed as one of the new that police dept wanted. I'm very fortunate. I'm looking at phd programs to see if I can begin that process.
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I'm so sorry we see your outer beauty and you don't.
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Maybe I explained myself wrong. I meant I hated the way I looked w the implants. I wouldn't even look in the mirror. I am happy w my body. I just wonder what it would've been if my doc would've chosen smaller implants. :)
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I hope you find your peace whatever that is. .. with implants or without. You look awesome but it's your body and you need to do what works best for you at this stage of your life. All the best:)
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Thanks
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Thanks for your positive shout out on LuvMyNatural's page! That made me feel a lot better. I wanted to ask you, though, you said in one of your updates that you looked like you "had nothing" after you came out from explant. When do you remember starting to plump/fluff up? I was a borderline a/b (I have photos too) and I looked so much smaller after implants. I only had them for 9 weeks. 300cc. When did you start getting bigger? You look fabulous by the way!
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Hi. So sorry I'm so late responding. How are you doing?
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I am so sorry to read about everything you had to go through. Yes, I think your problems were because your implants were very big for you. Take a look at mine, they are 175cc, mod-plus, over the muscle. I am like you, petite and I told my surgeon I wanted to have back what I had before breastfeeding, and I got exactly that. Almost 5 months post-op and they feel smaller since the swollen has gone down, very soft and natural. Well, I am talking about my right breast because the left one is still higher and has the downwards shape. I hope it will be normal in the future. Sometimes, I think I should have got 200cc and that is because my natural breasts were closer together, now they are more apart. I am very happy that I did it though, I have not have a problem with them so far. Of course I can feel the implant when I touch them, but i do not care. I believe that your breathing problem can be psychological, I mean a panic attack. I have had panic attacks for years and very strong ones. I feel I cannot breath at all but when they measure my oxygene is more than adequate. For some years when I was getting them I thought I was dying, then I got a little used to them and knew that my breathing problem was because of the panic attack. How long does this breathing problem last for you? I will be waiting to hear from you.
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Hi. I went to a cardiologist who agreed 300 ccs were too much for my 98lb body. I never had any type of anxiety attacks so I was confident that was not the case. Plus I had decided to keep them despite the fact I thought I looked horrible, just to avoid a second surgery. A month later the breathing problems began. I take it as a sign from God that they should've come out sooner than later. Everything happens for a reason and had I gotten smaller implants I would've kept them and who knows what the consequences would have been later on in life for me. So a very hard lesson learned.
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Hi Verdeluz. Don't sit on this, go get it checked out NOW! You're gonna make yourself ill with worry, the doc will, if nothing else, be able to put your mind at ease. Let me know how you get on. X
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I agree with LuvRealBoobs. It's probably hormonal since both your breasts are sore. The lump may be a cyst or fibroadenoma, both benign, but definitely get it checked out. Also, your boobs are probably more sensitive than before as they have each been through two surgeries in the past year. And any surgery/ injury anywhere in the body creates scar tissue. All that inner healing takes a while. Hang in there. :-)
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And...I have a small lump in one breast as well, near my scar. It used to be larger and was present very soon after surgery, so I assume it is a hematoma or a cyst from a suture that didn't dissolve or was inflamed. I will be getting it checked out. You are not alone. :-)
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I've felt a lump before right before my cycle and they went away right after before my ba .my sister also had problems before and she did infact pull a muscle but only in one though it healed up on its on.
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Awe, that sucks to find a lump. I have never heard of a scar tissue "lump" forming as a result of explant. If they left your capsules in, the capsules basically collapse and shrink down (according to my surgeon) and it should not form any sort of palpable mass. You are about the same age as me though, and I found out how incredibly common non-cancerous breast lumps are for reproductive aged women. About 10-15% of us develop fibroadenoma (I had one) and even more of us develop breast cysts. You definitely shouldn't freak out, but do go to your OBGYN or Primary doctor for a clinical breast exam. They will also probably refer you out for a mammogram and/or ultrasound. I think the explant probably has nothing to do with your lump - however the fact you have explanted will make diagnosing and treating this lump a million times easier! Try to relax and not get too stressed. For us pre-menopausal women the vast majority of breast lumps are benign, and hormone driven. But don't procrastinate on getting it diagnosed, because in rare instances younger women do get breast cancer... So even though it is like 99% probably benign you don't want to use your age as an excuse to not get checked out.
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Thanks. I'm trying not to freak out. This whole implant thing has scared me. I have the pain on both breasts same area. So my hubby says I probably overworked a muscle somehow. I still freak out. I'm gonna give it a few days and see.
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I thank you so much for sharing your story.I thought I was the only one.I am still going through breathing problems at least you got a break I pray for that.my chest feels wierd all the time and Feels like my breast tissue is just hanging on my chest.also,your breast looks beautiful mine still looks saggy after Almost year.thanks agian
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Love your new pics , you have healed up quite nice , I've had mine in now almost 4 months but will be finally removing them this month. I hope I heal as good as you . I really just pray I wake up and everything turns out fine.
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Verdeluz34, Time goes by so fast !You still looking wonderful. !! Beautiful pictures! you look very sexy!!!! :) Take care.
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Oh my god. You look AH-MAZING..do NOT put implants in you are crazy. Amzing booobs. You will ruin those beauties you got. Just remember...you probably wont want implants forever, and you will have to go through with more anxiety and another surgery to remove them again. So cute your boobs are very sexy. Soft, warm real boobies!!!!! Just wear a bombshell bra if you want the look of 175ccs every once in a while.
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You look stunning. Surely you're not considering re-implanting or did you mean if you'd got 175's originally? Speak to your doctor if you keep getting these symptoms. Take care you. Hugs. X
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OMG ---you look beautiful now--dont do it girlie--- xxxx Like you say the feeling you have could be just anxiety. xxxxx Take care--- xxx
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Your breast look great. I thinnk we are hard on ourselves because I don't like mine and I contemplate on getting 200 cc but also I sometimes get pain were I used to have the pain in the past. I'm scared to do it again.
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