27y/o 5'7" 105lb, 1 child, 371cc submuscular silicone gel

I am 27 years old, about 5'7" and 105lb. I have been naturally skinny my whole life, and teased mercilessly for it forever. My mom, grandmas and aunts all had full boobs as I was growing up and to me, becoming a woman meant getting boobs. A late bloomer, what boobs I did get (32-34A, i can cheat and say 32B at VS but only in a push up style, thank god for vanity sizing) didnt come until I was about 17 or 18 years old, and they didn't go very far. I only wear padded or push up bras. I hate taking my bra off, even to shower, and to the dismay of my fiance, I pretty much refuse to take it off in front of him, ever. They are embarrassing. While I do think I have a pretty good body, especially having had a baby about a year and a half ago, I am not super curvy and the flat chest just makes me feel like a 12 year old boy. I hate bathing suit shopping, bra shopping, dress shopping..I cant wear anything that requires you to go braless, because my boobs just disappear, which limits a lot of dress options. Push up bathing suits are a joke, they are even more padded than my normal bras, and very obviously so, so I hate wearing them. Ill never forget being 18 and having my 8 year old cousin say that she thought I was pretty but it was too bad I was so flat chested.
When I was pregnant with my son, my boobs did get a little bigger, maybe to a full B, and they were absolutely fantastic while breast feeding (which only lasted 6 weeks due to issues), and then they were gone...and even smaller than they were before, like little mosquito bites.
I am getting married next year and I want to feel good in my wedding dress. I remember prom dress shopping and crying, ending up with an $800 dress because it was the only one I felt even slightly good in. (should have saved that money towards my surgery!)
So I finally went for a consultation. This is something I have been waiting forever for. Money is tight because of paying for the wedding, but I refuse to sacrifice this any more. I work, and I work hard and my whole life is spent worrying about and taking care of everyone else, and this is something I want and NEED to do for ME. Everyone in my life has been pretty supportive. As this is something I have half joked about forever, they pretty much saw it coming. Almost everyone I work with knows it is happening because Im not embarrassed about doing it and I know they will all figure it out anyways when I'm gone for 2 weeks and suddenly return with a new figure. Plus, I work with all women, and if you tell one, they will all find out, so I would rather people hear it from me. [RS bleep] are gossipy lol.
My surgery is scheduled for September 8, and I am sooo nervous. I think I am most nervous about what size to pick and the pain afterwards. I don't tolerate pain meds well, so I am scared about that too. I am very narrow chested so the plan is to go with high profile silicone implants, because moderate profile would probably give me super side boob, which I definitely dont want, Im just afraid of the [RS bleep] star/stripper look. I dont want to go so big that they look fake, but I dont want to go smaller and regret it. I have reviewed so many people on here and I think I want to be about 300cc. I have a pre-op appointment on August 27 to discuss size, incision placement (I want under the breast), implant type (im leaning toward cohesive gel, but considering gummy bear also)
If I get the guts, I will post some before pictures. I am going to make some rice sizers today to try to get a feel for size, maybe Ill post pics from that too.
I would love questions, messages, input, pointers, etc if anyone has any! Thanks to anyone who took the time to read through this long ass post :)

Soo I did the "rice sizer test"! After looking up how to do it and how much rice to put in I tested out some 300cc rice sizers. I didn't have any nylons so I did it with thin socks and wore a sports bra. It is so sad how flat I look with just the sports bra. I hate going to the gym because I hate wearing sports bras and my push ups are so uncomfortable to work out in because they smoosh and dig in. When I do go to the gym I will wear a push up underneath a sports bra so my boobs don't disappear. Anyways, I was pretty happy with the 300cc size! I am still afraid they might be too small, but am a pretty thin girl so anything much bigger might look ridiculous. I will post a couple pictures of my rice test!

So a couple of weeks ago I was having one of those days that I have heard a lot of people talk about, where I started thinking of all the things that could go wrong, and all the reasons why I was fine just the way I was, and how maybe I shouldn't go through with it. And then I walked past this super cute (and on sale) bikini, and couldn't help but try it on. And as soon as i looked in the mirror, all of the reasons why I NEEDED to have the surgery came flooding back. I saw myself in that bathing suit and looked so flat chested, and felt terrible. Story of my boob life...lol. SO,, while I am still scared, and have my worries, I know that this is something I really need to do :)