So, I have been waiting for this day for years. I...
I hate my breasts. Over the years I begun to get back pain, I have painful stings in the sides of my breasts, I cannot lay on my stomach because it hurts... gosh I can go on and on. I have severe exhaustion. I have gotten all of my blood levels checked, glucose, iron.. even my thyroid. They cant find out what the heck is wrong. One day it clicked, its these darn parasites in my body.
My surgery is tomorrow and I cannot explain how excited I am to be relieved of this burden and to not be in pain anymore. I have been looking at pictures of other women on here after their explants and they look amazing. I cannot wait to have my small breasts back!
Day 1 Post-Op... I cried...tears of joy
So to give you some info on how surgery day went:
My morning started hectic as I live about 2 hours from the PS. When I finally got down there I forgot to take my Valium I was prescribed and was already having anxiety, not because of the surgery but my rough start to the morning. When I arrived the ladies in the front were amazing they made me extremely comfortable and could tell I was a little on edge and allowed me to take another 5 mg of valium. They settled me down gave me some water and crackers and I instantly felt at ease again. I believe her name is Jaime, but she was amazing, she is so caring and calming. I got dressed down and waited for my surgeon. When Dr. Chong came in I was so happy again. Very wonderful to talk to and also had a very calming effect about her. She walked me through everything that was going to happen and assured me I would feel no pain.
I decided just to go under local anesthesia. They put a topical numbing cream on and waited for it to take effect. They brought me into the room where the procedure was going to take place and talked me through everything. I was very thankful for that. She asked if I would like some music on and I was extremely happy for the distraction. We decided on reggae, love Bob Marley! Once i was situated and warm. The gave me shots of the local anesthesia which I barely felt because of the numbing cream. Once the procedure started I could feel most of what was going on (no pain of course) but I could feel the pressures, tugging and pulling. It was ok though cause she was talking me through so I knew what was going on. She knew I was going through nursing school so she was kindly giving me the run down.
We started with my left breast becuase I was having most of the pain on the left side. After all was said and done I had 475 cc's in each breast!!!!! Holy cow!!! I thought It was in the 300 range. Can you imagine the weight I was carrying around. After she was done she bandaged me up in a bra and an ace bandage. I literally felt no pain and could sit up on my own. When I initially got them done 8 years ago, I couldnt even move.
After it was all over I felt like I could run a marathon, I was on cloud 9. My hubby took me to chesscake factory we went back to our hotel and I literally stared at myself in the mirror forever. I looked so much thinner overall and I was in love with my reflection again. I felt fine all night and then I started feeling some tenderness around 9ish and decided to take my pain medication for good measure. I was fine again till about 2:00 a.m. and needed another. I took one real quick and went back to bed. Around 4ish. I jumped up and had to run to the bathroom to vomit. My dumb but forgot to eat with my last pill and left me ill for the morning.
I went back to my PS for my post-op appointment and they were very concerend with how I was feeling and wanted to make sure I was happy and confortable. My incision area was hurting and we found out that the bra was pushing down hard on my incison so we adjusted it and it immediatly felt better. I am sore on my incision site but its not like Im not used to pain in my breasts so its tolerable. We unvield my boobies and I cant speak for anyone else, but when I stared at myself, I felt this release of stress. I love my thin saggy little pancake boobies. The weight is gone, I feel so much lighter and I fell already that the tension I was feeling in my back and sholders has dissapeared. I know some women hate that initial view, but for me it meant freedom!
I am lucky in the my husband has been so supportive, he told me right away that he thinks they are beautiful and he loves my new body, it literally looks like 10 pounds had disappeard off my frame over night. I cant wait for the weeks to come to see my transformation.
Morning of day 2, love my little bitties :)
Day 3- Ouch... but i got to shower, yay!
Finally got to sleep on my side!
Day 8 I tried attempting grocery shopping= fail! I was in pain from having to lug everything around the grocery store and up onto the counter. I finally asked for help and they put everything into my car for me. When I got home, I was like sh*t, how the hell am I getting all of this into the house? My chest muscles at this point were on fire and I could barley lift my arms without it intensifying. I stared into the back of my trunk for 5 minutes. Finally i caved in and called my mom and begged for help. She came to help me unload the car and realized my house was a disaster. Hubby had to go back to work just a couple days after my surgery and I have a 4 year old... can you imagine the disarray? I told her she could stay and help herself to anything in the house (she likes to come over and hang out to get away from her house, lol) and I was going to take a nap cause I didn't feel well. I awoke from my coma a few hours later and she had cleaned the entire house, did all my laundry, and prepared dinner. Yay for mommies!!!! Yes I know, I am 28 and I still call my mom, "mommie". That will NEVER change :)
Day 9, and 10 I just took it real easy after my superwoman attempt of grocery shopping ( hubby was home so he did everything).
Day 11: I cleaned the entire house and cooked for some guests for Labor Day and felt great! I though it was such a good day I decided to try and sleep on my side again....success!!!!! I have been going crazy sleeping on my back. Im still wearing my ace bandage around my sports bra, I cannot wait to take it off, I have been wearing it religiously just in case. I was told that after day 14 I will no longer need it and I can just go about wearing a sports bra. Im still a little nervous though cause I still have a good amount of breast tissue and when they begin to jiggle it kinds hurts so I like how the bandage keeps them from moving around so much, but the bandage itself is uncomfortable. Anyway, Im so excited for the progress :)
Almost cried today and then something great happened...
As soon as I was in view of my husband he looked at me and said "Damn, you look so amazing!". Instantly I wanted to cry, because it made me so happy. I don't think he realizes how much I needed those words at that exact moment. I think we forget that large breasts don't define who we are. We are beautiful just how God made us. I never want to let myself forget that moment.
FML.... to say I'm disappointed is an understatement.
I went to the store today and looked around at some bras but didnt find any that I liked so I didn't get any. I was curious though to find out what my new size was....but too lazy. I figured I would find out another day. Anyway after my pics, I looked through my old bras and just out of curiosity I wanted to see how much a difference I am. My first bra I tried on I nearly freaked out....it fit?!?!?!? I read the tag and it said 34D (was a little too small for me pre explant). WTF?!?!? So I grabbed another bra, this tag said 34 DD, that fit too?!?!?!? I know that some women would be happy, but I AM NOT. I wanted to be smaller!!!! I was really looking forward to wearing smaller cuter bras and bathing suits. Im wondering, could I still be really swollen????????? I'm thinking that if maybe I loose some weight, they will shrink???? Augh...
I woke up on my stomach today!
1 month of being implant free
Forgive my spelling!
So far my experience has been amazing. They have been very informative and very pleasant to work with. Dr. Chong has a very calming voice and makes you feel so comfortable.