from Pear --> 'what a pair'? Feeling sad.

Hello all! I have decided to get a breast...

Hello all! I have decided to get a breast augmentation and this decision becomes solidified by the day especially last night in my yoga class. I am currently a 32 B but being that I am very physically active (dedicated yogi, jogger, and play in a soccer league), my weight fluctuates and alas, guess where does it disappear? my boobs!!

How long I've considered this? hah more like how long haven't I considered this. I have a 15 year old sister who has d cups, cousins, mother, aunts, everyone in this family is super curvy and bodaceous and as womanly as it gets.... except for me. Now, I've always been the more tomboy, super active/athletic not very feminine type but I always had a complex in my subconscious waiting patiently for these things to grow. I don't know why they haven't showed up but after something is missing in action for so long, some immediate action must be taken, no? Call the doctor stat! I have tried to talk myself out of it, tried other methods but alas, methods of gaining weight do not target certain areas and I don't want to gain weight, I am actually bottom heavy but my torso is really something else. I've bony in the top and while that makes for a delicate top, it also looks very pre-pubescent which bugs me! Every holiday in the summer, I don't like to wear bikinis while surrounded by curvy girls from my culture. It's such a nuisance. As far as other occasions, I dress very casual, not conservative per se, but not revealing either. I really want to fill out my tops better so that I don't look like a cutting board. I usually wear high neck top as to highlight my shoulders and distract from my little chest and actually love how elegant they look so I want to still be able to wear them even after surgery because like I said I'm very shy and wouldn't want to rock a low cut shirt and have the girls on display like "two eggs on a plate" as they say (hahhahah! did I really just type that oh wow).

Anyway cut to the chase here: I would like to be ideally a super full C/at least small D to even out my pear-shape, make me feel feminine and at the same time not look too done as having a BA that fits my frame is extremely important to me. I really want to get silicone despite the price and am also interesting in the gummy bear variety. Either way, I want to do this once (for the next decade, I am aware of their longevity) and do it right so that's what brings me to realself!

how i'm feeling? I'm actually very excited. I've been thinking about this for so long. I went through a phase in college where I would wear those 'add 2 cup sizes' bras underneath my soccer jerseys and gosh, I always liked how that looks because even though the shirts were loose fitting, I still felt feminine while being athletic. The excitement is because I have now graduated, have a job and am stoked to be doing something for mysel. I am not a "shopper" and like to save my money and spend it wisely on things that I really wish to covet. This will be expensive, yes, but I can't tell you how I feel when I look in the mirror and wear one of those simulated bras and just think, wow how awesome would it be to have a chest like this always?

I have actually consulted at a hospital in NY (they have PS fellow who perform the surgery while being supervised by an attending) and am still shopping around. I want to get it by the end of soccer league season bc I don't want to bail on my team but at the same time: a huge concern of mine is how long will the recovery take (for my work schedule) and how long will it be until I can resume workign out. I know this sounds picky, but I cannot go too long (as in more than 1 week) without following my yoga regimen, jogging schedule and soccer.

Now some other questions I've got. Do any of you know of any good surgeons in the greater NYC and NJ area (preferably not in manhattan bc the price would probably factor the doctors rent and I don't want to pay for that unless it's at a teaching hospital). Furthermore, what are your experiences with SHAPED COHESIVE SILICONE implants? What about the gummy bear variety? What profile would you guys recommend for it to looks nice and fluffy but still have a bit of natural swing/movement? I also have concerns about the presence of silicone in the body and how plausible would if be for one's immune system to possibly go haywire and attack the presence of that much foreign material thus resulting in allergy-like symptoms??

I'd love to hear experiences from all of you ladies, I value your word of mouth above all and also here are my stats:

22 yo, 5ft 2in, 108 lbs, currently 32B. I'm really conscious of my breast size because I'm the only woman in my family who doesn't have well-endowed double D's. I have been waiting and waiting but I have a high metabolism no matter how much I eat and I am very active. I want this 'boob job' to help round out my shape up top because my bottom totally doesn't match my 12 year old looking chest. I will post pics below:

Ok, so on Saturday morning, I went to a...

ok, so on Saturday morning, I went to a consultation with Dr. K uptown and have to say my impression of the visit as well as the doctor is very good. I tried on some of the implants that she had (stuffed into my bra, under my shirt) and was extremely lost as to sizing, diameter (high profile vs. mod plus etc). She did make the point that mod plus would work great since they add the same volume but are slightly flatter and have more diameter which would help the lack of cleavage I have. I felt very comfortable with her and must say it was refreshing and not at all what I thought the visit would be. I am looking forward to my other consults but feel very confident about this one so who knows? maybe I've found my surgeon!??! it's a crazy decision to buckle down on but I am so STOKED and want to solidify this decision already. After discussing with her that I wanted to go natural, she suggested I go for no more than 300 cc's and the more research I do online, compare other women's BMI's and same height/frame etc, the more I raise my eyebrows on if 300cc's would make the difference I'm going for. My problem with potentially going too big is that it would hinder my athletic ability and I can't have something cramp my lifestyle. I already feel slightly antithetical being a yogi and getting implants BUT I feel like it's now or never and I must just get them and move on. I'm not sure if i'm the only one that experiences this much self-doubt while still being hella excited for the procedure. Also the doctor's suggestion, I think, would as she said, bring me to "a full b cup" which could be a low c cup, and I don't want to undergo surgery and be just a small c cup. I am really trying to weigh the pros and cons here. The pro, as stupid as it sounds, to having big boobs (post-implants) is you didn't go udner the knife for an extremely subtle difference and the con, obviously, is not being able to sprint as fast. Eeek decisions, decisions! Maybe i should've taken some photos to show her? My goal is to have similar bust as Salma Hayek because her height/frame is the same as mine (she's 5ft 2 as well) and though she has a pretty prominent bust for a petite woman, it doesn't make her look fat or too matronly (something I am trying to avoid ever so much) and at the same time, you can hide it pretty well if you're a casual dresser (I wear t-shirts and cardigans practically all the time).

Annnnnnd, all of a sudden I am not so sure....

Annnnnnd, all of a sudden I am not so sure. =/

This is exactly my face now: =/. I spoke to a girl with similar build who has implants and she basically ruined my night last night saying she truly regrets getting her boobs done and that she is waiting a few months to take them out. She told me she feels like Frankenstein and that they feel way too foreign inside of her. I am so dissuaded at this point. I don't know if her issue is an individual thing but I truly don't understand. I am BAFFLED. I don't know if she doesn't want them just so she can be skinny again (maybe it's a New York thing) but I have never met someone that was so upset/regretful about their plastic surgery. I am just zeroing in on what I want, however, and in that aspect, sitting here right now, I want them to be bigger. Maybe I just need to go on more consults and ask the doctors if they can guide me to any of their ex patients so I can see how said patients feel?

So my question to all of you ladies who have had the procedure done: how do your boobs feel once they've settled down? do you feel that they're apart or your body or is it a constant reminder that a foreign implant lies there? Please PLEASE be honest with me because she kind of freaked me out last night, I almost wish I didn't ask because ignorance is bliss (just kidding, it is NOT but now i'm worrying). She also REPEATEDLY mentioned that the way they lie on her, don't have movement etc make her feel extremely conscious.

I don't know what's up but I've been feeling...

I don't know what's up but I've been feeling really down lately (these past few days) about my body. I feel like I am getting smaller in size and I despise what is happening to my body. i feel like my arms are getting bigger which makes me even more self conscious about my boobs and I just don't get why my fat is dispersed this way. It makes no sense! Went back home for the weekend and noticed, yet again, how freaking pre-pubescent I look next to everyone, my little teen sister included.
I just don't get it. Why is my body like this? I woke up and honestly feel so down looking at this chest, or lack thereof. It makes me feel awkward and it's not a transitory feeling like not liking a small detail about your face and then getting over it and growing into it. No, this is frustrating because it's my body and usually when you work on your body, you're supposed to see results so it's bringing me down big time because I dont understand why I'm gaining muscle mass in my arms. They look ginormous compared to my little frame and little chest. :( See pics that I've attached today.

So now that my league is over and I no longer have...

So now that my league is over and I no longer have the responsibility of playing soccer games every weekend, I am looking to book my surgery! I am so excited and will be booking as many consults as possible and because I have enough money saved, I want to get it done asap so I can recover in time for bikini season!

Back in the search!

So I've slept on this bc well, life happened, I got a new amazing job and have been caught up applying for med school. So, I've decided to reward myself! lol

Anywho, I have gone on a few of consults in addition to last year and right now am deciding to go with a doctor I met with most recently last month because he was the most knowledgable, blunt, and explained everything to the T. He was also running a special for the procedure when I initially got in touch with his office and it's comparable to getting the procedure done at NYEE (nyee=teaching hospital where you get surgery done at the PS department through a fellow and they have an attending - usually the fellow can get really top nyc docs to oversee the operation - there with them.) I was going to go with NYEE because well, it's a hospital and you have an entire team of surgeons and also the doctor I consulted with there was AMAZING. However, their administrative team is for one reason or another way too tedious to deal with so I think I will just go with Dr. K in Brooklyn because he has an ambulatory care center in his office.
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I can totally relate to your post from 2013 where you mentioned experiencing so much self-doubt while being excited at the same time. I am 24, and have been diligently researching since I was 22... I may get them later this year by the time I am already 25. I have experienced every emotion and gone through every scenario. I am very much into holistic health, yoga, exercise, etc., and it has felt like a hypocritical desire for implants, but the reality is however you want to define it. I hope you've found some peace and ability to love yourself the way you are now, despite aesthetics, because I think that's important before taking the next step into a drastic elective surgery. I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide upon, and remember to enjoy life no matter what.
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Congratulations on your new job! Good for you rewarding yourself...cheers!
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Hi. I can feel your anxiety. I was looking at lots of pictures and trying to find answers about profiles, placement etc. That can be so frustrating. Finally, my doctor decided on the size, the placement, the profile. I just told him I wanted it as small as possible. I just wanted to have back what I had before the breadfeeding of 2 children. I am norrow chested too, 27.5" and very thin but my breasts were a good size and shape before my children. After I was done breastfeeding they got deflated. My bra size was 34AA before and now I think it is 34B or C, not sure. The most important thing is that you get good brand implants so that you eliminate possible complecations. The other thing is the placement, which for my doctor and other official sites is going over the muscle. You have no pain in less than a week and they feel more natural because under the gland is where the natural breast tissue is. Look into that more. I do not know why most doctors go under the muscle, there must be a reason. I had a problem in my left breast so if you see my photos you will see the difference, but my right one is what the outcome is in less than 2 months. I got cohesive 2, Mentor silicone, mod.plus,175cc. I think they are a very good size for me, I even want them to look smaller and more natural. The first 2 weeks they felt very heavy and I wanted to have them removed, also because the surgical bra was so tight. Now, I am only going to talk about the right one, feels very soft and I do not feel I have something foreign in there. Do not go with Saline, they break so easily, even though they look more natural. My doctor used a sizer during my surgery and decided then what looks good on me and what my chest size could take. What do you think of my pictures? A girl told me in order to view the other pictures you have to clik on the review, I haven't tried it yet. I was wondering where my other pictures were because I can only see the profile one. I wish you make the right decision. Also, I want to say that no matter how many pictures you show your doctor and what look you want, the outcome will be different on everyone. I guess that depends on the doctor's tecknique and the original shape of the breasts. So, do not get crazy about it, you have to trust your doctor. It is like hairdressers. No matter what you tell them to do on your hair, it comes out differently and they all have a standard way of cutting hair. Waiting to hear your comments.
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Mimi, I read your blog and I am sorry you are feeling down about your body. I was the same way and it took years for me to get the nerve (and money) for my implants. If I could do it over again, I would have done it years earlier because I am so happy. My surgeon really understood my body and what would look best on me. It is so important to find a surgeon who is talented. When you find the right one, you will know it. Good luck.
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ah thanks so much for your input! It's wonderful to hear people reaffirm their decisions and that they are happy to have gone ahead with their surgeries!!!
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Girlfriend .. I was depressed about my body for a REALLY long time .. I have had a like hate relationship with it my whole life. Last year I lost 30 pounds and in December got my BA. Best decision I have ever made. So slimming!!! Don't be down in the dumps .. pretty soon you are going to be getting your new girls right??! Hugs!
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thanks so much for all the encouragement. I can't wait to get them done!
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My boobs jiggle and bounce almost like my old ones. They've been at least a little jiggly since day 1. And I honestly don't notice they're there UNLESS I lie on them...then I kind of notice, but it's not painful or uncomfortable, and I believe this feeling subsides as the muscle relaxes over the course of the year. I do NOT feel like Frankenstein...and I am being honest with you, because I had the very same concerns. Sometimes I don't even remember I have implants until I look in the mirror! They feel like mine, and as they get softer they're becoming squishier than my old boobs, which were dense and fibrous. I guess another time when I notice them is when I lay flat on my back. They feel firmer then, but I've noticed even that is changing and they're getting softer. One last thing: my boobs feel "cold" sometimes, kinda like how your fingers get cold because there's less circulation to them. That kind of freaks me out, but not enough to regret my decision by any means. I guess everyone reacts differently. But when I close my eyes, I can't tell I have implants inside of me. They don't feel heavy to me, either. I can go comfortably go braless.
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ok this is exactly what I was looking to read SIL esp the fact when you close your eyes, you don't feel like something extraterrestrial is there lol. I got so freaked out a couple of days ago and I don't know ... i though that maybe everyone felt like there was something foreign attached to their chest but just pretended like it wasn't there for the sake of beauty, because I DEFINITELY do not want to do it if that's the case.
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From what you have described, I'm built a lot like you - about the same height and weight, with my top half never balancing out the bottom. Even though I keep a nice, flat, muscular stomach, my chest was barely noticeable, even with a padded push-up bra! I have a 27 inch ribcage and wore a 30A or 30B (the A was a bit snug, but the B was a little big) before my breast augmentation. Because my ribcage is so narrow, I had to go with high profile implants instead of the moderate plus I wanted. Luckily, I nursed one child so I had some stretch to my skin with no upper volume to begin with, so I'm expecting to get a natural shape when the implants finally settle (I'm four weeks post-op right now). Even though the implants aren't riding nearly as high as they were at first, I am still have a lot of stretching on the bottom half to go and the muscles still get tight and twitchy by the middle of the day. I'm also having a lot of nerve sensitivity still. Maybe the girl you spoke to was feeling the same way and that's why they felt they didn't belong? Mine feel totally like a part of me after I get out of a hot shower or after doing the massages. They still don't move naturally yet, they pretty much just it there unless I move them around, but the nurse told me that's normal for the amount of stretching my skin still needs to do. As for size, I told the doctor I wanted to be a solid C afterward and I think he got it right (haven't tried on bras yet). My implants are 325 cc's. He said it is generally about 150 cc's per cup size on average, so that is a good way to gauge approximately how big you need your implants to be. I will say this though - the first week or two, with all of the swelling I was like oh my! I am way bigger than I wanted! But now that the welling has gone, I think I would have been just as happy with 350 cc's. When everyone says you get used to the size they are with the swelling, they are right. And I didn't find the sizers to be terribly accurate. I think I looked bigger in the sizers than I do with the actual implants. Also, just by putting on different styles of shirts I look probably a whole cup size different. By the way, after only four weeks I can't even remember what it was like with my little preteen sized breasts and I had them for 30 years! Even with all of the discomfort I'm still having, I'm glad I had the surgery and wish I'd done it ten years ago!
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ah thanks so much for contributing your story! I figured it might just be an individual discomfort and I think she's not comfy about how big hers came out because everyone in NY is more into being skinny and not necessarily curvy. I'm so glad you don't regret it and that the pros outweight the cons. I also have a tiny rib cage and am thinking of getting at least 350cc - 375cc!
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I think the person you ran into falls into a VERY SMALL category! I am only 7 weeks post op and they feel like a part of me .. I have silicone 457 ccs moderate profile unders. I have been massaging them since 2 days after my surgery. I am pretty active - ride horses, etc. I didn't need a new wardrobe going from a 36B to a 36D and can easily disguise them for my professional job. I also don't see them getting in the way of any of my activities and, in fact, I wish I went a little bigger.   I know it can be scary - not everyone has a positive outcome, but a HUGE MAJORITY of us do. There are also risks with any surgery - cosmetic or otherwise. I knew the risks and still went ahead and it has been the best money I have every spent on myself and one of the best decisions I have ever made! I would do it all over again tomorrow if I had to! Good luck! xoxo
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ah thanks so much NMBE
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I really hope that it's an isolated thing but she said it makes her feel even more self-conscious which shocked me. Right now, I can't say that I am that self-conscious about my boobs. yes, they're small etc but I don't really care for them because I always have clothes on lol. This BA would be a dream come true for my summer holiday though!
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AW! You will LOVE them when it's time to sport bathing suits!
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Hi, For your question on size, I'm 5'2 as well and have similar built to yours I honestly was so concerned about going too big and to tell you the truth I'm praying I'm done with the swelling and stay this size. I went with 410cc and 440cc and moderate profile. I really think you should consider hitting the 400 range. My friend who is also 5'2 similar build went with 375 and she was barely a C cup. Also, the rice test did not work for me, when I tried the rice test I looked huuuugggeee and felt so heavy I was mortified and went back to Dr to try sizers on again. Keep in mind you will look smaller than what sizers are because you lose some for being under the muscle. Hope this helps and go back and try sizers if you need to.
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thanks for your input I was thinking of hitting at least mid to high 300's -- almost 400. I will discuss it on more consults bc it could just be a doctor's preference.
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Size is always a tough decision! I personally wish I went bigger (I know I'm not alone) and with a slightly higher profile but overall it is better than what I had before! Don't get caught up on ccs - they are different for everyone. I had extra skin from breastfeeding almost 18 years ago so I was easily able to handle 457 ccs with no problems and so easily cover them up if I need to. The rice test and sizers are good for "feeling" how heavy they will be on you but you lose ccs when they go inside of you. It looks like you are starting off with nice looking breasts so I think you will have a fabulous result!! Good luck! xoxo
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thank you that's so good to hear!!! Your post op looks absolutely amazing and I have heard of many women having the 'boob greed' post-op lol
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Thank you!! I TOTALLY have boob greed!!!! I talked to friends of mine who have had their BA 2-3 years ago and wish they went bigger so it is just not a post op thing LOL! Don't let 1 person who had a bad experience change your mind btw. xoxo
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Good luck
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thanks hun!!!
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I totally relate to having well-endowed family. My sister is a tiny little thing yet somehow has natural DDs. Guess she stole some of the boob genes, haha. I also have curvy hips and looked "bottom-heavy" pre-op. It's so fun to be an hourglass, everything looks good!
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lol I always say that about my little sister as well hahahahaha and thanks a bunch for your input SIL, I totally related with your story and we have the same taste in clothing etc so it was def relatable and helped!
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Such difficult decisions... And there are no solid answers... Only you can decide most of them, but we can share our experiences.. :) I was a 36b and went 397cc mod+ I am a d cup. But, I will say I didn't realize how small a d cup was before surgery, I thought it was much larger.. I am happy with my size but if I'd gone a little larger that would have been great too!!  Hang in there, it's all worth it!!!
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