Booked my Mini for May 19th - Missouri

Okay, FINALLY added some after pics. I'm still pretty swollen. I'll be 3 weeks PO tomorrow. The arc of the scar and the new REALLY low belly button (not a fan) do give the illusion of a "gut" from the front, so that's not my fave. Under clothes it's fine though. Flat. The scar is really high on the sides, wasn't expecting that. I was expecting hip to hip, and got low waist to low waist. We'll see how it fades over time. I will never put myself through unnecessary surgery again, so whatever is, will be. I can't wait to start working out again, it's hard not doing that.

Had my drain out today. (Holy SH*T.) Feeling somewhat human again. Saw my incision for the first time (8 days later! It's been covered.) and it's pretty hideous. It's completely uneven, very high, and my belly button is unnaturally low. (like, REALLY low.) Plus it still hangs above the scar! I'm hoping it doesn't stay that way, but I really have minimal swelling today, and I can't imagine it firming up any more. I compared my 8 day out incision to everyone elses on here and mine still looks like a bad before. What gives? I'm pretty worried. There's definatly no hope of a two piece suit in my future, which wasn't the goal anyway, but still. Did anyone else have a major lip over their incision over a week later?

As of now, I'm inclined to say that this wasn't worth it. It kind of feel like a bad dream I can't wake up from. The pain has been off the charts, and the pain pills started making me sick yesterday so I had to stop taking them. I wound up hyperventilating last night through all the crying and yelling for help, which made my draining blood red again. It's been really awful. Meanwhile, having screwed up my healing last night with my little jag, I don't know if this awful drain will be coming out tomorrow or not. I can hardly fathom the 90 mile drive and coming home with it still in. I'm really questioning why I did this. So I had loose skin, who cared? People have flaws. It's not like this makes me perfect anyway. I had the binder off to adjust things this morning, and I was just completely underwhelmed by my flat belly. I just didn't care. I wasn't excited. It just made me want to cry. It wasn't worth this, not for what I've been through or what I've put my family through the past few days. I feel like I'm never going to feel better. For the few minutes at a time I can stand to move, I'm just pacing the living room like the hunchback of Notre Shame. If there is a light at the tunnel, I feel like seeing this flat belly is just going to remind me of a really bad experience in my life. I hope that feeling goes away. Right now, I just wish I never did this.