“Nervous and Anxious - Milwaukee, WI..surgery cancelled”

n Feb. 2010 I decided to take control of my health. With various health problems and weighing 360 lbs at my highest recorded weight I started eating healthy and exercising. That was 140 lbs ago. I am 5’9” and weigh 220. My goal weight is actually 180, after weighing 360 I feel 180 will be a comfortable weight for me. I feel good physically and I am able to do so much more than I was before. The problem is the extra skin that I have in my abdomen and thigh area. The only thing that will correct these areas is surgery. When I look down and see the extra skin that is so abundant that it covers my peri area it makes me feel as if all my hard work has been in vain. So I decided to see a plastic surgeon and see what he suggested. I have decided to have a TT and thigh lift but due to the fact that my insurance will not cover either one I will have to do them separately.

I have scheduled my TT for November 9th and I have to say that I am anxious and scared. I am not sure which I am more of, I guess it depends on the day. I am more concerned about being “knocked out” than what I am with the actual surgery. I have had surgeries in the past but that has been over 25 years ago. I am also the type of person that thinks of every worst case scenario, so that hasn’t helped the emotional roller coaster ride that I am on.

I know that I will look and emotionally feel 100% better when this surgery is complete but in the meantime I will be driving myself crazy J I will post some before pics as soon as I get up the nerve to take some. Sheila in WI

Updated on 27 Sep 2011:
The past few days I have been really excited about the thought of having a flat tummy. I am still feeling a bit scared but not as much as I was.
Just got the news yesterday that my husband has to go out of town on a business meeting starting November 14th and my surgery is scheduled for November 9th so that puts me and my 9 years home alone :) So now I am a little anxious wondering how I will be feeling at that time and hoping that I won't be needing much help....ugh

Updated on 27 Sep 2011:
I forgot to add that today I am seeing my heart doctor to get approved for sugery. I am presently on high blood pressure medication (which I think I could come off of but it is a low dose) and I have experienced parosyxmal(sp) atrial fibrillation but it has been awhile since i had an episode (knock on wood). So hopefully all systems are go...its in God's hands.

Updated on 9 Oct 2011:
One month from today I will be having my tummy tuck. For a few days I was feeling emotionally numb to the thought of surgery. Last night I woke up a couple of times thinking about it and told myself I wasn't going to have it done so I would go back to sleep. For the past couple of days (daytime) I have been feeling pretty excited about it. I have convinced myself it is in God's hands and what is meant to be will be. The problem comes when I am sleepy and have lost my power to think positive :)
I have been enjoying the conversation with others on this site, seeing their results, and hearing their fears. It helps to feel that I am not alone on this crazy ride.
One more month!

Updated on 16 Oct 2011:
Feeling anxious today to get rid of this stomach. Twenty three days to go! Sure, I still have moments when I feel scared but i remind myself that it is a normal feeling.
I go on the 25th to make my payment for the hospital use and my PS so then it is a done deal! Also on that day I will be meeting with my PS so I can ask a few more questions and be sure about the scar placement and the shape of my scar. I have noticed that there is quite a difference in the shape of scars and I wonder if that is the surgeons preference or they just do it how they think it will look best. For me, I would assume it would take the same shape as my fold...don't know.
I will be glad when the waiting is behind me :)

Updated on 26 Oct 2011:
Yesterday morning I went for another consult with my PS. I had a few more questions to ask and felt better going in to see him rather than asking on the phone. I then I had to make the payment at a late afternoon appointment so my husband could be there and on the way into the office I felt panicked. I go into the office and the lady from billing gave me the papers to sign and I told her I needed a minute and went and told my husband that i didnt think I could do it and I was ready to back out. To my surprise he told me that I have come this far with weight loss that I needed to do it for me. So I walked right back up and made payment. My husband don't say much about the surgery he just sets and listens when I talk and he has told me that I am fine the way I am (big tummy and all) so I was really surprised when he was supportive in the office. I may have backed out if it wasn't for him. I know this is something I really want and I will begin to be happy with my physical appearance once I have corrections made to all the extra skin. So now it is a done deal!

After the appointment we drove to the hospital and checked out the same day surgery unit and talked to one of the nurses. We have never been to this hospital so I wanted to get the feel of it before the big day. So we made sure of everything like where we needed to park and where to go. So I am feeling a bit better about the whole thing.

Noe if I could just stop waking up at night to pee :) When I get up at night I start thinking about the surgery then I can't get back to sleep. Ughh So I have been up since around 3 am and I have to work so it will be a long day for me.

Updated on 31 Oct 2011:
Today I paid the anesthesiologist fee and went and bought my wax kit and antimicrobial soap.
Last night my daughter asked me when my surgery is and usually I answer "Novemeber 9th" which gives it a distant sound but I realized its a week from Wednesday! Right around the corner. Anxious? yep Nervous? yep....but I am more anxious than anything right now but that is subject to change at any given moment. I wish I would go in and have it done when I am having a positive "nothing can stop me" attitude :)
I really can't wait to get it over and be free of this growth on my body...I don't even feel like it is a part of me..it needs to go!
With that being said, I am now wondering about this waxing thing. I never waxed before but I do know it probably wont be pleasant.

Updated on 3 Nov 2011:
Wellllll.....6 days and counting. Today i a m feeling excited :) and wish it was here already. I can't wait to look down and see whatever is under my apron! Sure I still feel a little scared and nervous but I am working on those positive thoughts.
I have my outfit picked out to wear to the hospital...a zip up hoodie and lose pants with some slip on shoes. Might need to buy some bigger panties, How many sizes bigger than my normal size should I get? I have plenty of reading material ready and a lap top. I also have my gel pack in the freezer getting chilled...I think maybe I should have bought two of them.
6 more days of lifting my tummy up!

Updated on 6 Nov 2011:
Well, down to 3 days to go and counting...yikes! Still excited to see this tummy go but still unable to imagine myself without it. It's been there for so long.
Last night I went out and bought gauze and tape so I believe ?I have everything that I will need except for something to apply to the incision for aftercare but i will see what my PS recommends. I also bought a couple of large gel packs that can be froze or heated in microwave.
I think I am ready to roll!

Updated on 6 Nov 2011:
Forgot to mention that when I went and paid for my TT the nurse gave me a information on CosmetAssure. It is an insurance that covers any type of complications for 30 days post op. She said all their patients get it and it can only be offered by board certified surgeons. Has any one else been offered this?

Updated on 8 Nov 2011:
Less that 24 hours to go...YIKES! lol I am feeling excited and scared of course. Just got a call from the nurse in same day surgery going over the last minute things she said I wouldn't get a call from the anesthesiologist but would talk to him about 45 minutes before surgery. However, I asked a few questions and found out that he does stay in the room the whole time and that the ones they have have been doing it a long time. So thats reassuring.
The nurse did ask me my weight but I am wondering how much I have gained over the last three days from eating too much because of nerves. I didn't eat off my diet plan as far as the types of food goes but the quantity was a bit overboard.
Today is going to seem like a long day at work.

Updated on 8 Nov 2011:
Oh! I forgot! The nurse also said I can back out anytime until the surgery. I told her that after all the mental anguish I have put myself through the last couple of months I Wont be backing out.

Updated on 8 Nov 2011:
Welll Cancelled surgery...not because fear got the best of me.....but as I said through this who process "what is meant to be, will be" and I am meant to be a mom another time. Something told me to go get a test before getting up and driving tomorrow so early in the morning. I tested twice and then called my PS's answering service and they had him contact me so that I could let him know. He will refund my whole amount. Still I am a little in shock considering I am 42 years old and I just lost a bunch of weight. But whats meant to be will be.
I wish all of you successful surgeries, fast healing, and self satisfaction. A tummy tuck is not what God has planned for me right now.