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Think Twice - Madison, CT

I had sub glandular saline breast implants put in...

I had sub glandular saline breast implants put in at age 23. I had always been small breasted (36A) and thought it would be a great boost to my figure and self esteem.

The Dr assured me that implants were safe and wonderful. I asked to be made a B cup, and during the 'try on' in the office, it seemed about 250-300cc would work, but the Dr explained that he would choose the actual implant size on surgery day.

Surgery went according to plan and was uneventful. I came to find out after surgery that the Dr implanted me with 360cc saline implants 'overfilled' to 400cc. I ended up a very full C cup. I was reassured that going bigger was for my best interests, as going too small would result in me being unhappy and having a repeat surgery to go bigger. I've now come to find out this is extremely common - and in reading women's profiles I know I am not the only one who was implanted larger than planned. Male PS opinions of what is 'proportionate' seems to differ from what actually IS proportionate.

I eventually got used to the size, but had not envisioned being a large-busted woman. I had BIG boobs. I found that instead of raising my self esteem and improving my figure, I was now top-heavy and eliciting very uncomfortable STARING from men. I started dressing in layers and slouching to hide my huge boobs.

I haven't been able to hug anyone properly with these hard balls in my body for 12 years now. I haven't been able to sleep on my stomach. It makes working out and running awkward - and as someone who is very fit with a relatively low body fat % I realize it looks FREAKISH. Breasts are mainly made up of FAT in nature, so very fit women have small breasts. I watched the Olympics and saw not 1 pair of giant bouncing titties. I'm not a porn star, and don't want to look like one. WTF have I done to myself? My fake boobs DO NOT match the rest of my physique and are NOT in proportion to nature for my level of fitness.

At age 28 I got pregnant and gave birth to my first child. During pregnancy, and then breast feeding, my breasts literally quadrupled in size. I went from a 36C to an immeasurable size (I estimate EE). They were huge, heavy, painful and hard as rocks. The hard, overfilled saline implants under the breast tissue made breastfeeding more difficult (baby couldnt get as good of suction as they can with squishy real breast tissue) and I believe more painful. As an immature 23 year old, I did not know that womens breasts keep developing through their mid-20s, and change radically during pregnancy.

After having my children, and even after losing my post-baby weight, I settled back to a 36D. So, now I have even huger boobs, and lots of nice loose floppy skin. Another great development is that I have now developed Capsular Contracture in my L boob... The implant is compressing so that the diameter of the L boob is a lot smaller than the R and it sits about 2 inches higher on my chest. I look like a freak, and I'm in pain from the contracture.

Now my only options are thus:

1. Revision implants with much larger implants to fill the loose skin (probably end up at least DD). They will also probably want to implant under the muscle this time, which will involve peeling my pectorals off my rib cage, and cutting the muscle attachments at the sternum - lovely. Of course, since I now have CC my chances of redeveloping CC are much higher. So, maybe I can spend $6k just to have deformed CC breast all over again. And have my pectoral muscles assaulted. And have even freakishly huger boobs. Sounds great. (not)

2. Some sort of lift - with all those extra nice scars and probably loss of sensation. Seeing as I did not have much breast tissue to begin with, I can basically pay $10k to have tiny titties again, but scarred up numb tiny titties. Sounds great. (not)

3. I can have a removal (explant) without replacement. Basically I can pay $4-7k to have these wretched saline water balloons removed, and just let my poor war-torn boobs settle into whatever state they are left in... Which is certainly a worse state than had I left them alone.

I am going to do #3 - explant. I wish I had just left them alone. There was nothing WRONG with my Pre-implant natural boobs. They were just 'small' which was to be totally expected since I'm an athlete and am not fat. They were cute. After kids, if my breasts continued to develop and went up a cup (as they did) I would have ended with a moderate B cup. I certainly wouldn't have ended up with Capsular Contracture, and the impossible-to-avoid surgery that I face now. And I would have saved myself $10-15k, scars, pain, anguish, shame, unwanted negative 'big boob' attention. I could have occasionally lay on my stomach. My runs ad weight lifting would have been less uncomfortable. I could have hugged people I love tightly for all these years without boulders between us.

WTF did I do to myself? Any girls on here interested in Implants, please check out explant (removal) reviews. I am not alone. SO MANY women with implants end up hating them, having problems, and repeat surgeries. If it isn't broken, consider not 'fixing' them. I wish I had just fixed my own self image instead of trying to 'fix' my boobs. There was NOTHING wrong with my boobs. They were cute. NOW, because of implants, there is a lot wrong with my boobs that ONLY surgery can fix - and cant really fix anyway. I kick myself in the ass for doing this to my body.

I've been hesitating posting pics, but I'm posting...

I've been hesitating posting pics, but I'm posting these specifically for NervousGirlie. I'm trying to find photos of my pre-op boobs, and also my post-op boobs before pregnancy. I'll update pics again when I do.

Well ladies, I had a mammogram and ultrasound...

Well ladies, I had a mammogram and ultrasound today. My Left boob, which had the mastitis during breast feeding, and which now has capsular contracture, also has a 2cm lump under the areola. Before doing any consultations for explantation, I had to determine exactly what Im dealing with.

Well, the mammogram wasn't easy, because my implants were in the way (duh). They can't flatten the breast out as much, have to take several additional X-rays, and don't end up with as clear of a view. But, after the mammogram and ultrasound, they were able to say its not a fluid cyst - it is a solid mass. However, they are about 99% sure it's not cancer, it is fibroadenoma, BUT they don't want to send me for a core needle biopsy to confirm that due to the tumor being on the implant, as they say it would be putting the implant at unnecessary risk of puncture, and they can monitor the fibroadenoma through manual breast exams and diagnostic imaging. They advised me to do the conservative 'wait and see' approach, by repeating mammograms every 6 months for 2 years to confirm it is not growing and changing (and thus is in fact a fibroadenoma). Well, I told the radiologist that Im wanting to explant, and he says if the implants are going to come out, i could do the core needle biopsy without them worrying they would pop my implant, and I wont have to get so many mammograms. But I also asked can I just get an excisional biopsy (where they remove the whole tumor under general anesthesia) at the same time as explant, and the radiologist thought it was a great idea, since I'll already be under, numbed, and in the operating room with a breast surgeon anyway. Also, with excision the whole tumor comes out. With needle biopsy whether it tests fibroadenoma or cancer the tumor is still in there, not removed. I'm cleared by the radiologist to seek a Plastic Surgeon who will remove the implants and (hopefully at the same time) remove the probably-fibroadenoma lump. So, the implant story has come full circle for me. The implants that I hate have dealt their final blow by interfering with my Breast Cancer screening, mammogram and testing of this tumor. The implants did not cause the tumor - but they are interfering with yet another extremely important aspect of my life. I'm so beyond ready to get rid of these things. I consider this the final chapter of my implant review. I'll be moving over to explantation reviews now to document that process. My love to all the ladies here whether natural, implant or explant. I wish you all happy, healthy boobies. Xoxoxo -- StillHateMyImplantsInOR
Name not provided

Recommendation of other implanted women

2 out of 5 stars Overall rating
5 out of 5 stars Doctor's bedside manner
1 out of 5 stars Answered my questions
3 out of 5 stars After care follow-up
3 out of 5 stars Time spent with me
3 out of 5 stars Phone or email responsiveness
5 out of 5 stars Payment process
5 out of 5 stars Wait tmes
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Comments (81)

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Just wondered if you would be willing to post update?
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I have another review about my explant operation. I am very pleased with the result.
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where is your explant review?
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I love what you wrote Sovran. I agree, when we were young and fit somehow we still felt inadequite. So many of us got implants for the same reasons. I am almost 3 months post and I feel better everyday. I can't even believe that I ever had implants. I feel like a hippie earth chick. haha. Big Hug. Birdie
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Hi. I am going to tell you my story and what I found out from other woman at the diagnostic center where I went to have my tests done for cancer. I felt a little lump in my left breast about 5 years ago. I went to the doctor, he felt it and said it was fibroadenoma and that it would grow bigger and at some point I would have to take it out. So it did grow bigger and thinking that it was nothing serious I just left it there and postpoining taking it out. The doctor felt it again next time I went to him for my pap smear exam and still said the same thing. That was maybe a year later, I do not remember exactly. The lump was moveable and its shape did not worry the doctors. It grew more in maybe 3-4 years and went to my plastic surgeon who is also an ongologist in order to take it out. He asked me to have a mamogram done and an ultra sound. I did and took the result to him to read it. He did not say anything to me except that it needed to be taken out as soon as possible and he arranged the surgery in the next 4 days. I had to pay 750euros and since I thought it was nothing serious I cancelled the surgery thinking I would find a state hospital where I wouldn't have to pay. I took my time trying to find a good doctor at a state hospital. Almost a year and a half had past and the lump had become bigger and changed in shape and also I could feel another little one next to my nipple. I was thinking about getting implants for about 10 years and since I was going under anestesia for the lump I decided to have the implants in at the same time. I would not trust any other doctor for the implants though so I went to my plastic surgeon have both things done. Well, a week after the surgery I was told I had breast cancer. Needless to say I had another mamogram before the surgery and the description of the lump did not indicate that it was malignant, just that further testing had to be done because of the density of the tissue. I had an ultra sound next day and the doctor said he could find out if it was malignant or not. He said it was fibroadenoma. I had second degree cancer and the exams were all negative for malignacy. Another woman told me she had a lump for about 10 years and they had told her that if she wanted to take it out it would be fine and if she didn't it was fine too. Hers wasn't as big as mine but when she took it out she had second degree cancer. The size does not indicate how progressed the cancer is. I have also read after researching about breast cancer that you do not have to relay on the shape of it or if it is moveable and looks innocent, it can be cancerous as well. Just take this lump out and do not relay on exams, only biopsy can show what it is. My first cousin who lived in Canada had mamograms every year and at the age of 47 she felt a lump. She had had a mamogram done 4 months prior to feeling the lump and the mamogram did not show anything. She died 1 year later because she was diagnosed with advanced cancer. So many examples say do not trust any doctor telling you whatever or any exam except the biopsy. I do not want to scare you, just to inform you. The other thing is that doctors put bigger implants than the woman's chest can take and they end up having complications later on. Don't they know that they would get very big during pregnacy? They only see this as big money, they do not care about the individual and what might happen to the woman in the future. The best time to do the implants is after you are done with breastfeeding. My breasts unfortunately did not get bigger, they dissappeared after breastfeeding 2 children and losing all the weight I had gained. I went with 175cc though which is very unlikely to give complications comparing to big ones. I am so sorry about this happening to you. I wish you the best. Today is my birthday, I am 49 years old. Yes, I know I am vain to decide to have implants at such age but I look much younger than my age and I feel so good with my implants. I thank God every day that I got to keep my breast. Good luck to you. Write me back with your view on my comment.
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Thanks for your comments and sharing your story! I agree with all you said. I was told I could just leave the lump in and "monitor" it through mammograms and manual exams - yeah right! This "advise" was given because of my implants, because of the Drs assuming I would rather "preserve" my implants and not my health! I ended up having a successful explant and lumpectomy in March, and pathology showed it was fibroadenoma. Thank god, but I will never look back. I had enough. Regarding your implants - I am not 100% against implants. I just believe that the majority of women (girls, really) who get them are too young, naive, and can't grasp the implications of going through life with implants. The primary purpose of breasts is for babies! A 19, 20, even 25 year old woman (really, still girls) have not had enough life experience in general, and have often not yet experienced the natural evolution of the breast (pregnancy, breast feeding, etc) and yet we go in and have a surgery that can impact one of the most important biological functions we have, which is nurturing our future babies! I think a slightly older woman who has had all her children, who has experienced the natural evolution and trials of what breasts really are, and has a more fully formed "self image", and probably a more stable career/financial position to handle revision surgeries or complications can make a more informed decision about getting implants or not compared to a young, childless girl. The human brain is not even fully mature until around age 25, yet so many of us do this to our bodies when we are mentally still children and can't comprehend the far reaching consequences of this type of decision.
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Thank you so much for your support. You are absolutely right. I am 49 years old and if I did not have to have that lump removed and put under anestesia I do not know if I would have done it. The difference with me and other women is that I used to have a nice, full breast, did not mind that it was small and then after breastfeeding I went into a shock looking at my chest and see them deflated. I had to live with them for 10 years. And then, since I was going to have the lump removed I decided to do it. I think I was very lucky because I do not know how long I would have postoponed the surgery to remove the lump had it not been for the implants. I also thought that I am 48 now and they would probably last for 15-20 years, so who cares if I have to have them removed at 60 or 65y. At this point I am also lucky that I could keep my breast and have radiation instead of having it all cut. I do not understand yound women that do it either. You have to wait until you have had your children because your breasts become so big that the skin cannot take it having already been stretched by the implants that are huge anyway for most women. Well, you know , it is the thing that everybody says :it is not going to happen to me". You try to warn them though and you become bad and jealous to their eyes so I am not going to prevent anybody from doing it anymore. I am so sorry you had to go through all this, what matters is that you are happy now.
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I saw your review, and you were blessed to be born with very nice natural breasts. It's true, nothing can compare to the real thing - but you look very good now as well! I am sorry you have had to go through this cancer, but also very glad for you that you could keep your breasts and have the implants done and lump removed. I think your case is a perfect example of when breast implants can really enhance a woman's life. Implants are not something that should be done lightly though - like coloring your hair or getting fake nails, lol. Unfortunately, I was young and stupid enough to approach implants that casually and I paid the price! Well, I have them out now and have my health so I can't complain. Stay strong! X hugs X
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WELL SAID!!!!
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Your review blew me away. Thank you for sharing. I'm sure you are hugely relieved that the lump was non malignant. Had mine out too. I too breast fed after implants and ended up huge. Then they settled but I had them replaced after 17 years with other ones because of "shelf life". All ok for 7 years Then CC. Then denial and self consciousness. Then I too thought wtf have I done to myself. They came out 8 months ago. Had a lift and fat grafting. They are little, but I no longer feel a freak. I'm 56.
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Sounds like you are more than ready to get the lump and the implants out. I totally agree with you that the implants are just a mask of a much deeper physcological problem. We all looked better without implants how can you improve on natural? Are you getting 2 surgen's at the same time or will the plastic surgen be able to remove the mass properly? Sending you possitive vibes for a safe and sucessful surgery. Much Love, Birdie
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Thank you Birdie! I explanted in March, you can check out my updated post-op pictures in my review of Breast Implant Removal.
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Beautiful results! Amazing how they are coming back. Even the day after photos are better than the implanted pics. I so live natural boobies in any shape and size. Congrats in your beautiful breast results! Xxx
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Hi just read your profile quickly so may of missed the bit about explant date---do you have a date yet??? I was an a/AA before and ended up a full C and ready your story about not wanting to feel like a porn star and covering up---i was so nodding my head at my computer screen. You have a tiny bod and i am sure you will look more beautiful without them in xxx
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I am explanted Reed! Thank you for posting your explant review, it was really helpful to me while I was deciding and then waiting to explant. I am on the other side, it is so much better now.
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I am also planning to remove my implants soon. I had two babies & breastfed both with implants. Five years ago, I got 425cc implants and soon after had my first baby (and my breasts became Huge, as you explained). Then I downsized to 325cc and had another baby. Now I have capsular contraction in my right breast. After all that, I am excited to explant! I look forward to hearing how your removal goes.
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I am explanted! So happy, CC is no longer part of my life. It is like a weight has been lifted off my chest - literally! I will take my real, small, droopy boobs any day over implants.
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Hi just read your story--yes you have turned full circle. Do you have a date for explant yet? I will be following your story---many thanks for sharing it on this site. All the very best to you xxx
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Thanks for your review. I feel exactly like you and I've only had mine in for 6 months. I'm also looking to explant soon as I can which may not be until the summer months or possibly spring break. Good luck. Sent you a private message too!
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Thanks for sharing your story hate. So sorry you are unhappy with the BA. I can't imagine spending thousands of dollars and despising the results. My heart goes out to you....GOD BLESS!!!
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I'm glad you will be able to do everything at once that is a plus!
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Thanks for being so honest - women need to hear stories like ours in order to make wise decisions on BA's. I wish I had been able to read reviews like yours (and mine) before letting a doctor cut into my nipples. I was just too damn young and the internet wasn't around!!!
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Hey at least you dont have to worry about ptosis ! that was funny one less thing to worry about,...
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Thanks Health! I have not yet scheduled surgery. My timeline goal is to remove before my 36 birthday which is in April 2013. I will have consultations with 3 local PS right after the holidays, and then hope to get the first available surgery date when I have the right doctor.
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First....I am so sorry to hear everything that you have gone thru. Thank you for posting and sharing all of this. I have been researching for a year now. I just can't seem to get off the fence. One day I am ready to sign the papers...the next day I read a story like yours. My husband is Great and always tells me, go with your heart. He loves me no matter what. Our sex is great and he does not stare at those that are blessed with nice boobs. I only want to go 300, which to me will look "normal". I am a small framed girl. I am 5'5" 112lbs. My bra size is a 36A which I do purchase from Victoria with the EXTRA padding. I truly don't even need a bra!! I have been teased by my parents and my son on being "FLAT". I hate it, it is hurtful and sometimes I think that is why I am so self concious. I know TMI, just thank you for sharing. Hugs! Angelbaby
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