Ready! - Kirkland, WA

Oh my goodness you just made me even more excited. I haven't found anyone into fitness and understanding like you just were.. Just the fact that you know about the tummy hanging down while doing planks is so.. Comforting! I struggle with it really badly. I am most confidant in the gym but still can't bring myself to wear cute outfits and find myself having to nearly pass out in a hoodie because I'm too self conscious to wear just a tank top. I am most excited to sit down and not have to fold my arms across my stomach to hide what appears to be a big gut hanging out. I am not sure yet if ill ever compete again. I would like to say yes but it's so hard on your body and unhealthy and just not my idea of fitness when It comes down to it. If there was a way I could prep for one in a healthier way i would consider it. How are you feeling with your recovery? I haven't done much research about that part out of fear in what ill find. Any advice/tips?

You have to look up lean bodies consulting on Facebook and online!!!!!! Much healthier approach to competing! It a whole new world! He's not my coach, but I follow him and his advice. He has a different approach than most. It can be very hard on your body and mind!!! The mind part is why I don't. I got way too obsessed ( which is easy to do) but I have friends that do it all in a healthy way. Well, one thing I learned is.. Take it easy! I'm 6 weeks out and started back at gym lifting this week. I still can't stretch out at all so no lat pull downs ( the stretch at the top of the movement hurts) , no abs, bent over rows not happening, tricep kick backs not happening yet either. I'm okay with all that though. TRUST ME you want to let your body heAl! The nurse tol me about a lady that over did it and they had to redo entire surgery!!!! Omg!!!the past two days got me too! I stayed out today and will tomorrow. Just know that it's a process... But it does fly by!!! Also, I considered getting leaner before surgery, I'm glad I didn't. I lost some weight (since regained) and hair fell out, dizziness, etc. I'm glad I had some extra reserves to get me through. Maybe I didn't need them, but I feel like I'm glad I didn't get leaner. I'm excited for you!!!!! What size you going for boob wise??

Wow. It's like you're in my brain. I've gained about 5 lbs of fat in the last 6 weeks. I've taken time off to heal my adrenals and de-obsess. After my consult last Tuesday I sort of panicked that I wanted to train like crazy over the next two weeks until my surgery to train and thin back out.. It's taking a toll I think. When I eat a less I tend to have my anxiety get worse and I'm already pretty anxious right now. I'm super moody and almost downright depressed right now feeling all scared about this surgery next week. I haven't really had anyone to talk to that's been through it and my mom hasn't been really supportive in the surgery aspect. So I've sort of had this tough attitude about it all and out of no where in the last few days have felt much less tough. I'm super OCD and have dealt with anxiety throughout the years and they seem to both be running me right now :(( I finally gave in on my nutrition today and had a big ol' (healthy) Spaghetti dinner and a glass of red wine. I'm sort of wondering if I should stay out of the gym and enjoy food right now and not overwhelm myself or what. I am worried about being too lax and then hating myself after surgery. I already teeter on that as is. It probably doesn't help that my period is a few days late. It's almost as if my hormones are just stacking up on me! Urgh!! Also, I follow Erik! (Lean bodies) and LOVE him. I follow a few others that are all about the truths of the fitness industry and it has all really opened my eyes up. I have battled eating disorder after eating disorder and body image issues so I am really trying to find a happy medium. I want to be an example to my children as well as feel comfortable in my own skin.

WOW! I get you, and you get me!! OCD, eating issues, body image issues, etc... I have been working really hard to get more balanced and enjoy fitness again. To enjoy the workouts- not obsess over "a look" It is HARD! I have done much better but I still fight it at times (but way less often). Especially right now- I just started back to gym. I was feeling so great about myself, then I get around these lean, muscle poppin ladies and I start to criticize myself again. I just have to remind myself that I am healthy, I'm not going for a show, and I am choosing to enjoy life.I want to eat an orange after 5 pm and not feel guilt! LOL!!!!! (I know you get that!) Being obsessed like that sucks, and I DO NOT want to go back there! I also want to be an example to my kids as well. Don't freak out and eat a ton, don't freak out and lean out. The week before my surgery, I stayed out of the gym and just walked. I didn't want to run myself down (which I would have) or expose myself to extra germs. You need energy and to be healthy going into this surgery. If you freak and lean out over two weeks, you will just lose more muscle with the fat you are wanting to lose. Is it possible that you are panicking too and therefore you are wanting to lean out (get strict, and feel like you have control ?) Not trying to overanalyze- just thinking about what I do in stressful situations. Also- will you have help at home with your kids? I would suggest that!!! I have to hop off here and take my daughter to school, but I will message you later and give you a list of items you need. Also- I was SOOOO SCARED and freaked out! If this helps at all- I wouldn't really be scared if I had to do it again. I DO NOT WANT TO, but the fear would be much less! LOL!!!

ONe more thing, pizza and red wine- yum!!! LOL.

Hey again! so I have a minute and wanted to add a couple more things... 1. I am sorry your mom doesn't support your decision. That sucks! Mine was mad at me at first, then she came around. 2. you asked about recovery. Well, its no picnic... but not too bad either. The pain is bearable. For me it was the emotional side ( I did not expect!) and also I just wanted to feel normal again! You don't realize the simple things you take for granted until you cant do them anymore. But also- its really cool to slowly be able to do them again and appreciate it SO much! (ex: wash your hair, hug your kids, go without a bra at night, fit back into your pants) expect swelling! and being emotional, and some pain- then know that it will all pass and life will be back to normal in no time. and that really the recovery is such a small part of time in your life. things I couldn't do without: fitted camisoles (under binder)- still wear one EVERY day and night ibuprofen (quit taking narcotics- hated them) walker ( helped ALOT) cleaning wipes ( I wasn't allowed to shower for 10 days!!) comfortable pajamas that button down front yoga style pants to wear after (NOTHING will fit for a while! you WILL want an outfit to wear to dr. or out or to just feel normal again) I also bought SPANX (I just had a binder and spanx helped a lot with swelling TONS of pillows ( I never did the recliner thing- just used pillows on couch and in bed) crackers and sprite Sorry I typed SO much!!! I guess I had a lot to say!! Ha!

Hey sorry it took me time to reply. I sort of avoided getting on here for a few days as i was having extremely bad bouts with my anxiety :( I decided to avoid the reality of it all and just focus on my house getting tidey and enjoying the last few days i had with my family while i was able to play with them. Did some really great yard/house work done over the last few days which has helped keep me busy and feeling less stressed as i will have less to keep up with while i am recovering. I depart on thursday and get to seattle a few hours later. That night we're gonna do some shopping and enjoy a nice dinner then get settled into our hotel room. The next day (friday, april 5th) i get to the ps office around 10 for my surgery. I stay in seattle until friday april 12th and get home that night. At that point i'll be a solid 9 days po. The following monday i go back to work... and i do daycare.. but i only have my two children and one 4 year old girl that is really low maintanence, coming that week. The next week i begin a full load of daycare kids back on.. At which point i will be 17 days po. My brother lives with us and has said he is up for helping me with things such as lifting the kids and other things i am not allowed to do. Other than that i am back on to being a full time mom. I'm kind of worried about this but sort of gonna play it by ear. I have a friend that is able to come and work with me if i need her to but she isnt as cost friendly as my brother haha. I will just see how i am doing. I'm hoping my normal super woman powers will be flowing and that i'll be my normal self, for the most part, by then. But not getting my hopes up. I think the part i am most nervous for is the emotional side of it as i had my gall bladder removed a year ago and the recovery from that had me in bed for a week. I had a lot of air in me left over from the surgery and it was way more painful than i had set my self up for. I am sort of anti medication so of coarse i tried powering through it and paid for it.. this time i wont do that haha. Gosh sorry now i am rambling. I think im just getting my thoughts out now since i dont really have many people to talk to about it all. Well i have people to talk to. Its just that most people dont think i need to talk about it i think, because im always so "tough" about things. I sort of wish i had a girlfriend that has done this before that could tell me to just chill out and that ya it sucks for a few days but to quit whining and that i'm gonna love it. Ya know? some of the stories on here have sort of freaked me out and into this mindset of complete fear! what the hell haha urgh. All in all i am excited and feeling really euphoric. It still hasnt hit me that this is happening.

It's hell for a bit, then it'll all get better. ;) It is rough but I think you know that. The pain isn't all that bad really. I quit pain pills early ( I hate them!!) its more the emotional side and the constant discomfort. But trust me, it'll pass!!!! And very fast it'll go so fast!!! My 7 weeks hve flown by!!! It's slow at first (like 4 days) then you feel better daily and before you know it you're better. Trust me girly, you will be thrilled with results and finally having tight ( like when you were a teenager skin) tummy. My friend has a rockin body and amazing abs! Like amazing! She never cares if her stomach shows at gym ( hell, I'd show em all the time) and finally I feel that way. It's awesome!! I don't have abs like hers AT ALL but I do have a flat tummy tht I am proud of!!!! Yes, proud of!!! Yep, I paid for it, ha!!! But I'm damn proud of it!! It's so cool!! I show everyone who asks! Even at the park yesterday I lifted my shirt and showed a friend.... I would NEVER have showed my belly before in public!!! it's awesome to feel comfortable in my own skin. I even feel sexy, even when I eat crap!!! Lol!!!!! Get excited girl!!! Don't think negative, it does no good. The dr and nurses do this every day. They are not nervous. Its just another day at the iffice for them. Before you know it, summer will be here, an this procedure will be a memory only. This surgery has helped my confidence so much. Before I picked apart my body so much! Now, yes I have a cottage cheese booty from not working out and eating poorly, but I don't care! I will get back in shape and I still can rock a bikini so I'm over it! I'm less critical now and barely look in mirror! Weird!

Thank you for the support! Means the world :))

I am going under the muscle. A moderate profile? And thinking a good c. We didn't go over ccs or size specifics but both agreed not too big and that I wanted to look athletic still. I'm super small as is so anything is going to look major I think hahaha I'm so excited though. How are you feeling? Nervous at all?

Nervous is an understatement. Sometimes I'm totally excited and other times, totally terrified. Talk about a roller coaster! Even though I am tall, I wanted to stay conservative as I am a runner and wanted to stay athletic looking,but at the same time fill out my little sacks of what used to be a full B. I'm going with 300cc Moderate + profile silicone unders. I hope to be a large B, small C. I ran a marathon this last Sunday and the whole race, I was checking out boobs all around me. Kept my mind occupied, but confirmed to me that I want to stay on the small side.

Thats awesome! Congrats on your marathon. Props to you! I am a horrible runner haha. Hows the emotional roller coaster?

It's smoothing out. Now that I have all my post op items, the anxiety is starting to turn more into excitement. How are you doing?