And Away We Go - Jenkintown, PA

So, here I am, pushing towards 13 weeks post op. How do I feel? I feel great! How do I look? Dressed? Awesome. So happy. In my underwear? Eh. I've come to the conclusion that I won't be rocking the bikini this year. That T scar and vertical line are just too much for me to handle and put out in the open. They make me sad.

My weight has continued to be a struggle. Most of my shorts still don't fit. My thighs are swollen and there was no work done to them. Just the flabby skin cut off. I am a clean eater and love my exercise, so I am patiently waiting to get back to normal. Thank goodness it seems to be the year of the maxi skirt. It gives me the freedom to still look good even though I am still struggling to get the weight off. I should probably mention that I weigh LESS then I did the morning I went for surgery.

That brings me to the "geez, I wish I would have known or thought about that before I did this" comment. My body has totally changed. Before when I gained weight, it went to my middle. Now my weight is in my butt and thighs. I NEVER gave fat migration a thought. Not like I look big. People tell me all the time that I look amazing. That helps, but not fitting in my favorite shorts just sucks.

I'm still happy. I'm happy I made the decision to do this. The pain, depression and everything else that comes with a major surgery is worth the end results. And hey, I still have a LONG way to go before I can honestly say that I am completely healed. When they say give it 12 months they aren't kidding.

If you are considering doing this, do it. Don't be afraid. I was terrified the day of my surgery and even started to panic on the OR. Next thing I knew I was shivering in the recovery room. Every tear I have cried has been worth it. I'm wearing clothes that I would have never had the confidence to wear with the belly hanging off me. It's nice to not have to tuck it in the top of my jeans when I sit down. Come on, we've all done it!

Here's to getting a little help when genetics don't work your way. I'm thankful everyday for my wonderful husband who supported me enough to allow me to have such a major procedure that was totally elective. Here's to all the doctors that make women like us feel good and here's to all you women out there that shared their stories and gave me the courage to do the same!

So it's been 8 weeks for me today. I'm happy to be reaching this milestone and looking forward to the next. It's been another roller coaster ride since my last update. I was SOOO excited to go on vacation to Florida until I went to put on my shorts from last summer. NOTHING, not one stitch of clothing came up over my thighs. Oh man, I was mad. I had to go two days before we were leaving and try to find new shorts. I bought one pair and a few long skirts. It's easy to hid a body parts you're not loving under a long skirt. Then I came to the realization that I would not be in a bikini because of the tiny slit in my skin under my bb. So. Now I'm a mess because I just spent close to $8,000 for a better body and I'm "fat" and can't show off my belly which looks awesome for the first time in a long time. Let's bring on the depression!

Traveling 24 hours in a car from Philadelphia to the Florida Keys is a bear. Sleeping in a car is no fun. Getting to the heat and humidity and blowing up like a blowfish sucks! Need I say more? Spent the week crying internally because of all the skinny girls at the pool rocking their bikinis and I'm in a tankini with a bubble butt. SIGH.

Long story short, I hit my "jumper weight". You know the number on the scale that makes you want to jump off the roof. I have gone back to working out with an 85-90% effort level. The sit-ups are the worst. Only did a TOTAL of 25 this week. Ran for the first time this week though. PAIN FREE. I was so afraid to try, but I can't live this way forever, it's time to regain control. All in all I am feeling better, but it's been hard. If I said it before, I'll say it again, this isn't only a huge adjustment for your body, this is a mental game as well. The highs are high. The lows are low. I wasn't prepared for the lows.

Things are looking up. I have my slit, hole, whatever you want to call it, fixed yesterday. (that's what the white line is in my pics) Back to the ps next week for suture removal. I will keep up my exercise and clean eating and be the bombshell I've always wanted to be. Now...who's with me???

I read once and was told once on this sight that the three week time frame was a turning point. Man, was that statement correct! While I am still having trouble with a spot on my belly, I feel like I've come back from the great beyond!
This week saw me return to my workouts. OK, so it was only two, but that's two more then I did last week! I grew a set and left my binder in the dust! I was thinking that I was comfortable in it because it was tight and felt safe, but the freedom that comes with the right pair of Spanxx (or a cheaper alternative) is priceless. I'm back in my skinny jeans and that right there gives you confidence. People that have watched me go through this are telling me I look amazing and can see the difference in me, both mentally and physically. Three weeks is awesome.
Today is my 4 week PO day. It's funny, because we woke up to some unexpected snow this morning. It snowed the day of my surgery last month. Maybe Mother Nature just wanted me to see some snow before winter is over (LOL! I could care less, gimme some warm weather!). So, as I enter week four, I see that I am healing nicely. My swelling as been minimal. I've been a good girl. My scar is raised, but I guess that can be expected. My belly button DID NOT DISAPPEAR! It's funny the crap that goes through your head as you watch your body morph through the different stages of healing.
Advise for you "newbies" and those of you thinking about this. Do it and stay the course. Not everyday is easy, but it's worth it in the end. My confidence is at an all time high. Dressed, I look A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! The scar will fade and so will the negative memories. I'm looking forward to a year from now when I can look back at the road traveled and smile. I mean, who am I fooling, I know there's still going to be some bumps along the way. Heck, I still need to keep an eye on a spot under my belly button (see my pictures) that isn't healing properly. Dr. thinks its an internal stitch that won't let go. TIme will tell and if it doesn't heal on it's own, he can fix it, in his office. I love the way my husband looks at me and I love how he tells me to stand u p straight when I start to slouch in the evening. Good posture make this look even more awesome! So, peace out all my fellow TT'ers. I'll update at PO week 5 with my latest changes and personal thoughts. Off to get the kids. Half day of school!