I've never really had any breast at all, except...
Anyway, I am not even a barely there A, if there were a negative -AAA, that would be me. I am hoping for a full C cup, but I don't know what cc's. I do know I'm going with silicone and under the arm incision.
I will post pics, as soon as I figure out how. I read one woman's profile and saw her pics. She did before, during and after. It helped me so much, if I can do that for one person, I want to. I also wanted to be here for other women in my age group. So many are young women, I thought it might help for women of my age to know they weren't the only ones.
I have been with my plastic surgeon for many years because of skin cancer, so I am completely confident and comfortable with him. He even gave me a frequent flyer discount!
This place has been a real blessing for me. I'm not married or even involved with anyone so the only person that knows is my daughter. It's great to have a place to talk so openly and hear about other's experience. I'm really excited and counting the days. 39 to go.
More wish boobs
Less than 30 days to go!
16 days to go
Cutting off all my hair
Less than 2 weeks!!!!!
I really miss my mom and my sister right now
Mom was my best friend. We did so much together. She would have been as excited as I am. With this being the last weekend before surgery, she would have taken me shopping, out to dinner and then helped me cook and clean. She would have taken me to surgery and spent every moment after pampering and spoiling me.
I'm already having trouble sleeping. I was up about 5 this morning and it hit me hard. I miss both of them so much. 3 years after Mom's accident, my only sister died. She was only 49 years young. Turning 50 this year was hard. I never wanted to be older than my older sister and now I am. She was the typical big sis, would kick my butt in a heartbeat. But no one else better even look at me wrong. She was such a petite woman, but the whole family would say when Aunt K.... hugged you, you knew you had been hugged. She was strong as an ox. It was just the 3 of us, Mom, K and me and we were really close. We lived within 5 minutes of each. If we didn't see each other every day, we talked on the phone.
My mother had a BA when I was a young teenager and my sister was naturally blessed with DD. I know they both would have been so excited and happy for me. Even though they both have been gone for a few years now, there are still moments when I miss them so much and this was one of those times.
I guess this was as close as I could get to share this journey with them.
Cutting off my hair today
I LOVE LOVE my new hair cut and I will post some pics tonight when I get home. I have not posted any "Before" pics just because I didn't want anyone to see these tiny boobs without also seeing the "new" girls. But I want you to see the different sizes I try on today and some of you have been so supportive of my cutting off my hair so I guess it's picture time.
I went to the cemetery this weekend and changed the flowers for Mom, Sis and best friend for Mother's Day. I wasn't sure I could make it out there next weekend and even if I can, I don't think I would be able to physically take care of the grave sites. I'm really happy with the way the flowers turned out this time. Some times they look great and sometimes I'm not very happy. But I have to say this time...they look great!
As so many have said before, this site has been such a blessing. I have met some wonderful women, learned so much and feel better about the decisions I'm making and my recovery. Thank you all for sharing your experience, I hope I can pay it forward.
Pre-op went great...425 cc's HP
After going over all the meds, she actually wrote in several places my allergy to adhesives and made sure they had the hypafix on hand. Daughter told her she would have my supply with her just in case.
She then measured the 2 "lesions" and marked them for surgery, making sure to write in big bold letters "DO THIGH FIRST". My EKG was over a year old, so she sent me for another one.
Then we went to see the PS. He talked more about the skin cancer than the BA. We played with the implants and decided on 425 cc's, under the muscle, inframmary incision. Daughter got a big laugh when I was looking in the mirror at the 425's and couldn't decide. She said "Jump up and down Mom." Well we all know what happened when I did. She laughed and laughed. My kids are a hoot.
I know a few ladies have asked about what to wash with before surgery. My PS gave me a container of liquid soap he wants me to use Wed, Thurs and Fri morning, neck to hip.
He also gave me this sweet little notebook called My Look Book. It's great, has pages for notes, like a journal, pages of FAQ, pages for my own questions, slots for my implant cards, a page to fill out dates for pre-op, surgery and post op appts. I love it!
He said I would have to wear the strap and surgical bra 24/7 for 2 weeks! No driving or lifting for 2 weeks. My surgery is on Friday, so no shower until I see him on Monday. Then he looked very stern and "No peeking!" Ha...he knows me well.
I did ask about Rapid Recovery, they had not even heard of it so that's out the window. :(
My favorite nurses in this office came in to see me and loved my hair. The nurse who has been with me since the beginning said she would be in the OR with me too! She laughed and said he could not take my skin cancers without her.
So here we are, dropped off scripts, got EKG and blood work done, paperwork signed, surgery paid for, size picked out. I will pick up meds tomorrow.
So here are the pics, some of my hair, some of my little notebook and a couple of my ittybitty's.
It's Boobie Eve!
Today is the day!
1 Day Post-op
3 days post op
I have been in a good bit of pain but not from the implants, just sore and tight there. But my leg is horrible. It finally quit bleeding, but it's bruised pretty badly and throbs most of the time. I will not post any of those pics, I love you all too much!
Post Op appt
Tuesday, Day 4 post op
Booby Blues are real
Thank you for listening. I'm sure most of this ramble comes from a lack of sleep. I am posting some new pics, not because there is much difference yet but because looking at the new girls is what's getting me through right now. I'm just not accustomed to being unable to do the things I want to do without restrictions.
1 week post op
Now here is something he told me as a warning I want to share with all of you. He had just come out of surgery from removing implants and repairing damage she did. Her implants were only about 6 months old and she was doing very well, everything she was suppose to. Something happened at work (he did not say what) and her left arm was jerked back, tearing a pec muscle and causing bleeding which pooled around the implant and hardened. He may have to do additional surgery and it will be months or longer before he can replace the implants. Ladies, be careful.
New pics up. Left incision is looking pretty good, right one not so much but I can start the scar treatments now so I expect it will improve soon. The girls look really big to me, I would like to know what you think. I started keeping track of their measurements. The day of surgery I was 33 inches around. The night of surgery I was 36. Today I am 38.
Measurements at Victoria Secret
I only bought 2 bras. They did not have a large selection with no under-wire and just in case the size changes, though I don't expect they will. No pics of the bras, nothing special, just a nude and a black to get me through work for the next few weeks. But here is one, bra-less in a tank top, couldn't resist. ;)
I have to tell you, this was the best shopping trip daughter and I have been on. Typically, we both get upset. VS never had them small enough for me or big enough for her. We would both end up in tears in the dressing room. But not this time. They are now carrying daughters size, 38DDD or 40DD and I have actually have boobs to fit in a bra. This time we walked out laughing. She is so happy to have good, pretty bras. We went to lunch and came home. I am worn out. But oh what a great time. I love my girl and to see her so happy just thrills me like nothing else.
2 weeks post op
I told him I'm not having any pain aside from the soreness, but super sensitive. He said it's because my skin is so sensitive to everything and it would slowly go away. I was concerned the rash I got from the surgical bra has cleared up, but the "patch" is still there. He thought in time it would fade and not leave a permanent mark.
He still won't let me wear a regular bra or sleep on my side. He said 2 more weeks. :(
3 weeks today
For all the ladies who are just starting this journey though, I want to update and let you know what I have experienced in hopes of paying it forward for all the ones before me who shared their stories.
Let me start off with the soreness. I'm not in real pain. But my breast are sore. The skin and nipple are super sensitive, almost like a sunburn. I feel a lot of movement under my right nipple. Sometimes when I bend over, I feel the weight of the implant, but only on the right side. I have talked to the PS about this and he said it was normal, I might feel this type of movement for up to 6 months on either or both sides.
I thought my age might slow down my recovery. The older you get, the slower you heal. I've been fortunate as I seemed to have dropped much faster than most. My girls have fully fallen into place but I have to say, they were never very high to begin with. I have even thought it was a good thing I did do HP or they may have been sitting too low at this point. I'm pleased with the incisions also. I use vitamin E oil on them at least twice a day and more on the weekends.
I am massaging and doing range of motion exercises as many times a day as I think about it. I think this is really helping with the "fluffing". They seem to be much softer, but still not as soft as I hope they will be.
This might be a little touchy for some ladies but I want to share my experience for those of you with questions. Sex. I waited 16 days, not because PS told me to, it just worked out that way. I have read from lots of women who did not wait a week. I was very careful to not allow any weight on my breast. Let me say though, as gentle and careful as we were, they of course got a lot of attention. I was swollen and sore for several hours. Not swollen and pain like from surgery. But it was their first time out so to speak. Just be aware, this might happen and it's OK. ES Tylenol worked for me and I was fine within a day or so.
PS restrictions still-no regular bra, no lifting over 5 pounds, no jogging/running though I can walk as long/far as I want. Only back sleeping still (I have been cheating on this one) He considers today the half way mark. If I continue to do as well as I have, he will release me at 6 weeks.
Don't let high number cc's scare you from getting what you want. I started off thinking 325 and would not have come close to what I wanted. 425 scared the heck out of me. I didn't want HUGE fake looking boobs. I'm so glad I trusted my PS and did what he suggested. He would have gone as high as 600 if I wanted. If I had to do it all over, I might have gone 450, but no bigger. I am thrilled with my 425's and have no regrets.
Here are some pics from this morning. The reason there is one of my cat is because he kept trying to photo bomb my pics. I finally promised him he could have his very own if he would leave me alone. He is my baby-12 years old-I rescued him when he was 2 weeks old.
4 weeks today
I'm pretty upset. I have done so well. No nausea or constipation. I dropped really fast, minimum swelling that was gone in a few days. No real bruising. Other than the rash, I thought I was having one of the smoothest recoveries.
So my instructions for the weekend are no use of my right arm other than range of motion exercises, did I mention I am right handed? Motrin every 8 hours.
I just can't believe this!!
I'm OK YAY!!! In fact....I'm great!!!!!!!
I felt fine when I got up Sunday morning and went all day without taking anything, still no pain when I went to bed last night. I didn't sleep very well, but it was from feeling so anxious, not pain. I was really afraid the pain was going to come back, that something was wrong. As much as I tried to calm myself down and stop over reacting, I couldn't. The pain I was in Friday had gotten so bad, worse than anything I felt after surgery. On a scale of 1 to 10, it was an 8.
When I got to the doctors office and my nurse called me back, my PS was standing in the hallway, by the door, waiting for me. I just love this man! I didn't even get to the room and he was asking how was my pain level. I told him I felt wonderful and he got a big grin on his face. He followed me into the room and we talked. We were both so relieved. He then left so I could undress. Then he examined me. No pain, no tenderness. He said "I've known you for almost 15 years, I know how you are, you simply over did it. You thought you were doing so well, you jumped back in too fast." He wants me to slow down some, but he did release me to sleep anyway I want, including without a bra!!! I can wear any bra I want, I can swim, jog, workout. My only restriction is no push ups or chin ups (no worries there) and to pay more attention to my body. He said he was certain it was telling me to slow down and I ignored it :( So ladies PAY ATTENTION. He wants to see me in 2 weeks just to follow up. I think I need a visit to VS to celebrate!
My new VS bras.
Here are the pics Sassy.
6 weeks post op
I must say the last couple of weeks have been a greater challenge for me than the first few were. I seemed to do so well the first 2-3 weeks, it really surprised me how sore I have been. I did not think this far out I would still have pain but I do. Not so much the sharp shooting pains from the nerves. I get sore on the outside of one or the other. I work 2 jobs, so when I have a long day of 12-14 hours, I am very sore the next day. But I have learned how to manage it.
I have been so pleased with my results, I'm somewhat surprised to say this but.............I wish I had gone bigger. Not a lot. But I have 425 and now if I had it to do over, I would gone 475 or 500. I have been a full C, small D for the last few weeks. But now I am a C. I have gotten smaller as all the swelling has gone away and they have dropped and fluffed.
For any new ladies trying to decide on size, do not let the higher numbers scare you. If you want a D cup and your PS says it will take 500 to get you there, trust him. Don't let the high number of cc's keep you from getting what you want. On the other hand, don't be discouraged if he says 275. It's all in how much breast tissue you have pre-surgery.
I have not gotten accustomed to have larger breast yet. I am still very aware of them. My skin is still sensitive when I go bra-less, that's when I am really aware of them. Even though I can sleep anyway I want and I have always been a side sleeper, it's strange to feel that boob under me. So far, all of my clothes still fit, other than old bras of course. They just fit better.
Other than the very select few I told, no one has noticed. If they did, they never said anything. I'm glad, that was the way I wanted it. I wanted people to wonder "Did she or didn't she?"
Here are the updated photos.
I have a history of skin cancer. I am 51 today as a matter of fact and I have been having them removed since I was 27. I have had over 30, 2 with my BA and at least 75% of those have turned to keloids.
This was a big concern for me when I first started to contemplate having a BA. I have used the same PS for the last 15 years. He knows about my scarring. We had several conversations spanning a year or more on this one topic. I was really nervous.
I think they look great. I use vitamin d oil on them twice a day, every day. Several times a day if I'm home. I rub it on the incision site with enough pressure to help flatten the scar. Anyone who keloids knows if you can flatten them it's half the battle! I rub as firmly as I can handle it. As my PS had told me, if it hurts, you're doing it right.
This is not a common phenomenon for Caucasian women but it does happen. It's scary I know. You want big, new, beautiful boobs but not big, new, ugly scars! There are no guarantees it won't happen. Talk to your PS. Make sure they understand you have this issue.
These pics are not to show my breast though I'm very proud of my new girls! But to show you how my incisions look today. I am 52 days post op today.
2 months post
For those of you about to have this done, there is nothing to be afraid of. You might have read all the stories about nausea, constipation, sharp shooting pains, morning boobs, numbness, drains, can't sleep, hate this strap, hate this surgical bra, I just want to feel normal again........ It goes on and on. While this site is in fact the best place to be, you will read about every symptom and every pain associated with having a BA. Understand you may experience some or none of what you read.
My advice is go for it and go big. When I began this journey many months ago I thought I wanted 325 cc's. I did not know about over or under, choice on incision site or which profile. After being here for just a few days I learned all these things and much more. My PS had told me all along he wanted me to go at least 425. So at my last consult, I decided 425 was it for me. Even then PS told me I could go much larger if I wanted with no problem. I stuck with 425. I was too afraid of bigger numbers meaning Pamela Anderson tits!
The first few weeks, I was very pleased. I felt I had done exactly what I wanted. I was measuring a full C, small D. They were perfect. PS warned me. But I foolishly thought by week 4 they would not change any more. I was wrong.
At week 5, I was simply a C cup and now at 2 months I no longer fill a C cup bra. After all of the money, time, pain and effort, I'm smaller than I wanted to be. I would say a very full B maybe small C.
Now listen, I love my new boobs. I was so flat, anything, even a B cup, would have been an improvement. But I should have listened to my PS. He said the only complaint he ever gets is "I wish I had gone bigger" and now I understand. He did an amazing job. I was never up high or square. My scars are fading quickly and my boobs are now as soft as regular best tissue. The shape is nice and natural.
I don't want to be a whole lot bigger. But I should have gone with 475 or 500. I may have been rather large the first few weeks. But in the end, I would have been right where I wanted to be.
There are a couple of reasons I'm telling you this. First, if you have had your BA and think you are too big. Just wait. They do change and settle. When the doctor tells you 3 to 6 months, it's true. Second, if you haven't had yours yet, go bigger than you think you might be comfortable with. Do not let the numbers scare you.
If mine continue as they have, getting smaller as they settle, I can see myself doing it over next year. That's how upset I am and if I can help one lady get what she really wants, then it was worth me laying it all out on the line and being totally honest.
So here are my 2 month pics. They are beautiful even if they are not quite what I wanted.
I cannot speak highly enough of Dr. Pettigrew. This not the first work he has done for me. He has a wonderful manner. Always willing to talk and answer questions. He really listens. His work is beautiful. The staff are so sweet and treat you as if you are the only patient they have. Everyone was as excited as I was.