Isn't it crazy how the things we do seem like such...
I am 48 years old. 5'3" and approx 130-135 Lbs. I'm very active, have awesome children and a terrific super supportive husband. But I have certainly made my share of mistakes alone the way.
17 years ago I went through a very difficult divorce. Lost a lot of weight(major anxiety) and was left with super low self esteem and two extremely deflated breasts. Before the divorce and subsequent weight loss I was approx. a B cup. I was not flat chested and never ever had I even thought about breast augmentation. However, my post marriage very droopy flattened out mommy boobs made me so self conscious and I wondered if any man ever be interested in me again..I was in nearing 30 at the time..I hastily took what little money I had and went to the PS and asked for a lift. He said I would need a small implant or the lift would not be successful. I was gullible and gave him the money without knowing many details.
I woke up and found myself with huge breasts!...Saline-over the muscle- Benelli lift. Omg what had I done?! Honestly I never even thought for a second that they looked good. Ok, they were not droopy but I really wouldn't say they were perky either...At that point it really didn't matter because I had zero $$ left to spend and life, kids, work etc got in the way of anything being done about it. After all I was the one who wanted this so badly!
Within the next few years, I went back to my original weight before the divorce. My new bra size was 34 DD or bigger but I refused to ever buy anything bigger than that !Major denial! A day did not go by that I was not self conscious of my breasts. Every picture that I was ever in just looked like one big huge boob. I hated them so much but I was too embarrassed to ever tell anyone. Hate is actually an understatement for how I felt about them.
Flash forward 17 years... I still have them and I still hate them! I have since remarried to a wonderful man who is behind me 100% with whatever I want to do. These waterbags have been through so much with me. Miles of running and riding horses(oh that was not fun with these stupid painful bags of salt water!) and SO many hours of working out. They have just become such a part of me that I just got used to them I guess. It has taken a long time for me to be able to forgive myself enough to spend the money to have them removed. It sounds so stupid but its the truth...The journey has been a long one. And I could write a novel about all that has happened.
The important thing is that I am ready now! My husband and I went last January to one PS for a consultation. I had a bad feeling there and although the PS was very supportive I just didn't feel like he was the one. My PA at the doctor's office that I adore and trust told me about Dr Christine Stiles. I went for a consultation a few weeks ago and I was over the moon when I left her office!!! Wow! The staff was wonderful, she was so informative and understanding!!! She explained everything to me. She said my implants were 375-400cc(Omg that's huge) and my implants were very hard and the scar tissue was bad(stage 3) which would explain the pain I've had. Being done 17 years ago they are also very wide(think salad plate,lol). We discussed the dimpling that is so dramatic at the bottom of my left breast. Obviously she will remove the capsules and drains will be a necessity. I asked about a lift and she recommended waiting at least 6 months to see how my breasts will respond. I trust her reasoning completely. Not for one second did I feel embarrassed or self conscious. I scheduled my surgery for August 14. My pre-op appt is August 1. The surgery center is across the street from her office and I will have GA. In the meantime, I have to have the blood work etc next week.
I can hardly stand it I'm so excited! I am not a large person and my body will hopefully finally be in proportion. It has been so long I am really not even sure what size my real breasts are. Guess we will all find out soon enough.
Thank you all so much...You don't know how much each of you has helped me... Hugs to you all.
8 days till explant!
These days are crawling by! Out of town right now but I've been meaning to post my pics .. Yuk I think they look worse in pictures! You can see the extreme CC on the left side and moderate on the right also. I can feel much more of my own tissue on the right. I am wondering if I will be two different sizes or if they will be more even once all the scar tissue is out. Time will tell.
I went to my preop last week. Got my prescriptions for pain pills and antibiotics. They will give me a front close bra to take home and another one I will be in when I wake up from surgery. I will wear these for two weeks. Then soft sports bras. The nurse went over drain care with me and gave me several pages of instructions to read.
I also had my blood drawn and basic medical check and all is well. Now it's just more waiting....
New surgery date Aug 15
Tomorrow is the day!
A couple things I am a bit worried about... how do you guys keep yourself from rolling over when you need to sleep on your back? Pillows on your sides? I generally sleep on my side so I'm not sure how that will work out..
Also, for those of you who have already explanted..My breasts and nipples seem to point in opposite directions..will they stop pointing out once the implants are removed? Even a little would be nice..
I am having the capsules removed too. I am curious how much breast tissue will be attached after 17 years? I actually think I have some to spare but I'm not sure. Maybe this sounds ridiculous but I just want to make sure I don't have too much of my own breast left.. I just want to be free of all this bulk...
Well I better get going so much to do today. Thank you for reading ladies!
Waterbags are gone!!!!
Wow what a week! Surgery was Thursday morning.Dr. Stiles came in and drew on me and talked to my husband and I. Super nice PS and the nurses at the hospital couldn't say enough great things about her!
Implants were removed as well as the capsules. Felt pretty good when I woke up except for an achy right breast(the one with the worst CC). My Dr. said the scar tissue was stuck to the muscle so there was more work to be done on that side. I felt pretty good except for my right boob aching, a sore throat from the tube and an achy jaw area. Dr. Stiles thinks it may be the way that my head was positioned by the anesthesiologist during the surgery.I was discharged about 1:30 that afternoon.
I was super tired when I got home but very relieved. Took about a two hour nap and I woke up with extreme nausea. I was shaky all over and sweating. My right breast was enormous compared to the left one. It was obvious that something wasn't right.
My husband called the PS office and emailed them a picture to show the swelling on the right side.
Soon after that the office called and said Dr. Stiles needs me to go to the ER asap as I would need to go back into surgery. Apparently I had a very large hematoma that would need to be addressed right away. My drains were draining but the right side was significantly more than the left.
So... back to the hospital we went. I was in tears, didn't want to go back, and was worried that I would have to have a different Dr. Luckily Dr. Stiles was waiting for me when we got there. What a relief. She was so calm and it really helped. ( I have had trouble with hematomas in the past from injuries so I understood what was going on. Just not happy about it). They took blood in the ER to moniter my hemoglobin which was low due to just having surgery earlier that day.
Everyone at the hospital couldn't be nicer to me and the new anaesthesiologist was very informative and comforting. I don't remember much after being wheeled into the operating room. Next thing I knew it was 11:30 PM and I was in recovery. Dr. Stiles had already talked with my husband and daughter who were there in the waiting room.
Dr. Stiles wanted me admitted for the night and I think I was relieved to not go home. I had a great room and super nurses. Didn't get much sleep that night even though I was so exhausted. Dr. Stiles came in 3 times the next day!! My hemoglobin was low due to the two surgeries and blood loss. She started me on iron and also a shot. She told me my breasts look great and she even manipulated the tissue to help shape them a bit during the surgery.. She said I will be very surprised and happy with the outcome!
At that point I was so swollen and bruised and tired I really didn't care. I was released to go home late Friday afternoon. The weekend has really been a blur. Dr. Stiles said to rest as much as possible due to the two surgeries with GA in one day.
I finally can see what I look like now that the swelling is going down. I am super happy with the results.! Wow so much better than I expected. Tomorrow I go for a recheck. Maybe I will get the left drain out but I'm not sure.
I have to say that even though the drains are a bother, they do not hurt. I am so grateful for that. I am very very bruised right now. I knew I would be as I've always bruised terribly. Dr. Stiles gave me Arnica tablets and I also ordered some gel.
So that's my story... I honestly haven't had the energy to write much these last few days. I have barely opened my computer. I am finally feeling better and more like myself. I will post pics after the bruising has gotten better. I can say that my breasts are much much less droopy without the implants!!
Drains are gone!
I am so happy with my breasts. I have quite a bit of my own tissue left. For sure a B cup and possibly a small C. I figured I would since I weighed much less when the implants were put in 17 years ago. I do feel like I am still a bit swollen but everyday it is getting better. I am still quite bruised and turning all shades of blues, yellows, and greens.
Ladies don't let my talk of bruising alarm you. It is just how I am ...seriously I can get a bruise by walking through a doorway and hitting my arm. There is nothing wrong with me, its just the way I am. I have very thin skin and I'm sure that doesn't help.
I'll post pics when I'm not quite so colorful. I am using lots of Arnica gel and I do think it helps.
Can't wait to go to sleep tonight without the drains..really loving being natural!
Informative, gentle and reassuring. I have only had the consultation but I walked out of her office knowing that I was in the right place. The staff was wonderful and I actually had FUN at my consultation. I know that I will be in the best of hands!