New Pics, and really worried about dropping to much and rippling....

Ok here's my story so far..... I am 32, mother of...

Ok here's my story so far..... I am 32, mother of 5 and have the boobs of a boy....I have always wanted to have boobs, to feel like a woman and more confident. I am always hit on, so I'm not looking for that, this is for me. I am scheduled for my final visit and to schedule the surgery for sure on Jan. 17th.... One minute I am so happy and ready and willing to fight though this, but the next I read some horror story and im convinced I am making the worst decision of my life. I have read people having these horrible lifelong illnesses and people dying and bedridden because of implants (I know nothing is proven)...... I have researched every angle possible, it seems my world I'd wrapped around this for awhile now, but I want to know I knew everything before hand, that I didn't just jump into something, my goal is to have them done soon (by the end of Jan) as I leave for business to Germany the beginning of March for 10 days...oh yes and let me add my 12 yr old says to me mom don't get them done, did you see the episode of 1000 ways to die where the girls boobs exploded on the plane.....just lovely........I did look into it she was given plastic......

What I'm asking from anyone who's willing to respond (and I have read 100's of your stories). Is what have you learned, how do you feel, do you feel these diseases are really happening to people...was this one of your fears?? Any advice would be great...... I will eventually add photos...... And thank you in advance for any and all help!!! (And for those who are going to say talk to your P.S, I am believe me I have 75 more questions written for Thursday). :)


I just read your blog Jamiery5, and thought I'd comment because of some similar thoughts that ran through my head yesterday as I was walking to my car from my office. I see you got the procedure done (although I'm not sure when you got it done) but you're having trouble coming to terms with the healing process and battling a lot of self-doubt right now. That's okay but let's put it in perspective, okay? Follow me in my logic... I am 7 weeks PO right now. I had silicone implants put in, sizes 345 cc and 415 cc. I was a lopsided 34 B (barely) before. I knew going into this that there would be an emotional roller coaster that I'd be taking a ride on but I wasn't sure how steep the hills would be or how long the ride would last. I just knew I was standing in line waiting for it to happen. And it did and I'm still on that ride. In fact, I see it as possibly lasting a year, which is how long PS's tell you it takes for everything to settle. I think it will likely take the mind just as long and we'll likely be surprised by the random twists and turns this ride takes us on. Like Nomoreboobenvy, I have had challenges with one of my incisions healing. It's taking a long time to heal so each week I take a photo and compare to the previous week's photo to calm myself down. I send these photos to my PS each week and he confirms that the incision is looking better and there's no need to worry. I have a trip coming up where I'd really like to go in a hot tub so I feel a time pressure to get everything healed, which doesn't help. I no longer have pain or discomfort in my chest and can sleep on my sides very comfortably. The implants don't feel so separate from my breast tissue any more when I flip from one side to the other in bed or sit up. Everything moves as one, which is a big change from the first month. I'm now exercising more and that helps HUGELY from a psychological point of view. I feel I have control of my body again, which we lose in the first month. But I LOVE the way I look naked, I LOVE the way I look in a swim suit, and I LOVE the way I look in clothes. Yesterday at work I looked down at my chest and thought "cool, those are MY breasts! There is no padding there and they look so great on my body." So, as far as physical recovery goes, things are getting back to normal now. But yesterday, on my way to my car I realized that I had been worrying lately about what I'd done. Little thoughts would pop into my brain here and there and I'd shoosh them away. I started to question if by having the procedure I had just replaced my "boob envy" thoughts that were present during the first 40 years of my life with "implant worry" thoughts for the last 40 years of my life. Oh crap, I thought. Will I be forever wondering if something is going to go wrong? If CC has set in? If my partner's weight on my chest during sex would rupture them? And the BIG KICKER: If I had done something to jeopardize my ability to stay a healthy and living mom for my children as they go through life? I thought "Oh my God, what if I just did this selfish thing for myself at the risk of being around for my kids?" As I got in my car, however, something VERY IMPORTANT occurred to me. Every time I get in that car and get on the road, I do the EXACT SAME THING. I take my life in my hands by operating that dangerous piece of machinery so I can go to work, go to the mall, drive down to Florida for a trip... On any given day I may not come home to my kids because I do this. Sobering, I know, but billions of people around the world choose to do this anyway. It's a known risk we all understand but make a conscious choice to take because the benefits far outweigh the risk. And that, my friend, is the perspective you have to put on your situation. We made an educated decision to improve our bodies in a way that will make us feel better about the clothes we wear, our naked images staring back at us in the mirror, our sex lives, and our states of mind. When these doubts come into my mind, I remind myself that I got braces to fix my crooked British-inherited teeth. I had to undergo surgery to remove 4 of my own teeth so I could get that perfect smile. I spend $200 every 4 months to colour my dirty blonde hair so I can have perfect blonde highlights. I use chemical whitener on my teeth to get them their brightest. I have lash extensions put on my eyelashes every month so my eyes will pop. I put coloured chemicals on my nails every three weeks so they'll be pretty. And I've never thought twice about doing these things or if they would impact my ability to live a long life for my children. So I'm choosing not to start thinking that way now. You need to find a way to put this enhancement in perspective for yourself and get help for your incision when you need it but don't freak out. I've learned over the past month that a negative state of mind only hinders our healing process. You may feel a loss of control over the situation but you can absolutely control your thoughts so start there and focus only on the positive for now. And take care of yourself so you can let your body do its thing.
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Very well written and thought out. Good advice .
Thank you so very much for that Brooklin Trigirl. You are very right and I to think of the danger we live in everyday, nothing in life is certain and I know I never want to do anything that jeopardizes my life with my kids....I think that's my biggest fear in life. I've been doing better little by little emotianally and physically. I think I realized I've been under A LOT of stress lately and this surgery made me stop, I couldn't work, clean, workout, nothing and alls I could do was think....(that's never good when it comes to anxiety lol) but I started to see everything going on around me and how I need to fix it. There are still times where I want them out, and do not want to deal with it, but as I read from a dr. And it really helped, he can always have them out, try learning to be happy with them that's where I'm keeping my head right now. I am 11 days PO today and I see a big difference from day 1 till now....don't get me wrong, I still have moments where I feel like I'm losing it, but I push right back and keep going....I thought I knew everything about implants.....but I guess it's like anything,you don't know or worry about these things until they are part of you, until it affects your life. It's very hard explaining to people around me how I feel they can't understand how I wouldn't be jumping up and down for joy.....thank God for this site :) :) my goal this year was to be the healthiest I've ever been, I smoke (I hate me for that), I wanted to start running again and get my but back in shape......and then boom I decided nope, I have the money right now and I'm don't his, because who knows when I will the spare money again.....but I've never put me 1st, and that is sooooooo hard to do now....again Ty for all your words and I wish you the greatest recovery and keep your head high,you will get in that hot tub!!!! :)

Hi all....well I'm 12 days PO, I'm doing better in...

Hi all....well I'm 12 days PO, I'm doing better in some things and really bad in others... I see my PS again tomorrow.. I have this horrible pain on the right side of my boob, it spreads through to my armpit, shoulder and shoulder feels like my muscle is ripping apart when I ove my arm, just walking around sometime it's hurts so bd I hold my right arm up and brace it like I have a broken arm.....the left one is the bigger one, and hurt more in the beginning and it's still sore, like I would expect (nipples killing me, twinges of pain, feeling like milk is coming in etc) but what the hell is wrong with the right one, is this serious, am I stuck with this horrible pain forever....I still can't life my arms all the way up, especially not the right one. I know recovery takes time, and I expect up and downs, but this is horrible pain..... Also another question....when were you able to life things we received and emergency situation and we took in my 5 month old niece into our custody....I know at this point I can't life her, but so many people have young kids and life them.....if anyone has any helpful tips....sorry to birch and complain...just really stressed and tired and I want to be getting better now in awful pain.... Ty to all.... Added a new photo too..


Around the same time as you, I had similar symptoms. It felt like a pinched nerve or a pulled muscle somewhere in the depths of my left chest and shoulder blade. It would come and go and get worse if I moved in a certain way. Pulling on my shoes and boots was the worst because I was compressing my chest muscles. I think it was the chest muscle trying to repair itself. It lasted about 2 weeks and then completely disappeared. It wasn't there all the time but it definitely made me favour that arm for a bit. I cradled it like you describe. All part of your body mending itself, Hun. It will go away.
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Sorry you are in pain :-( I know for some people it takes longer to heal. You need to take it very easy and try not to stress out. I hope the pain is much better today. I'll have my consultation today,I'm so nervous!!! But I have to say I'm very thankful I found thus site with all of you girls!!! Feel better soon!!! Big hug!!!
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Ty mermaid05!!! Best of luck at your consult today, if I can give any advice, make sure you really know everything about it, the depression afterwards, the affects of anesthesia etc....I'm not trying to scare you from doing it, but I can honestly say, I'm not sure whether I will keep them or have an explant.......I thought having big boobs would be soooooo wonderful and make all my jealousy and hatred towards my chest go away.....and it's not the key to the problem :) :) beat of luck and I pray it all works out for you!!!

Hello all my Boobie friends :)... I haven't...

Hello all my Boobie friends :)... I haven't written in awhile, been slammed with a lot of personal family stuff and it's been rough especially right after surgery.....I'm doing better everyday mentally and the depression has calmed some too :). I'm still very sensitive, but I can shower by myself and actually lift my arms lol....they still fell like there ripping through my armpits and my left one is a so much bigger than my right one.....uuugghhhh that irritates me, especially because I like the bigger one nipples still feel like they are being sliced open :(, and I'm still wearing cozy sports bras, when I put a regular bra on I feel stinging pain by my incisions yet they are healing well...thank God!!!! They seem so far apart does this change when they D&F??? Will the sizing even out....will my armpits stop hurting....ohhhh it's soooo annoying.....hope all of you are doing great and healing wonderful!!!!!


I'm do glad you are doing better. I'm here to remind you to take it easy, you are still healing. And by the way you look fantastic. You will see how pain will pass, boobs will even in size and you will feel great! You sound more positive in you last comment. I'm very happy for you, hung in there. I'm schedule for March 13, nervous as hell lol but I'm sure I want to do this. Big hug! We are all here for one another so if you need to chat come here or email!
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I'm three weeks out from TT and BA. My breasts are starting to fall nicely into place. I've been doing the massages and they are coming together. My breasts are naturally far apart, so they will never be real close, but they are closer now then I thought they would be. They do feel like they are up in my armpits too, but coming down. Are you massaging yet? I started at 2 weeks post op.
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Hi dragonfly88, no I'm not allowed to massage until 4 weeks, so a week from this Friday :(. I'm very happy to hear you are doing so well!!!! :) :) :)

Soooo...I decided today (1 day away from 3 weeks P...

Soooo...I decided today (1 day away from 3 weeks P.O) and I wore a regular no wire bra for the first time to on both boobs near the incision it's red and purple kind that just from the bra, is that normal, I couldn't see having a hematoma on both in the same spot, but of course I'm a nervous wreck....I was allowed to wear a regular bra after 2 weeks and I pushed it a little longer and now I'm freaking out that I hurt was a pretty comfortable bra (as comfortable as you can get with boobs that still hurt)..... Did anyone have this???? Ty in advance!!!!

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Added new pics, maybe you can see the redness by...

Added new pics, maybe you can see the redness by the crease...


WOW they are looking beautiful! I did not even notice the incisions, I was son distracted by you nice boobs!! I think that you will be fine, incisions look ok to me:)
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Thank you very much for the compliment!!! Big hugs :)
Wow, you look great! I wouldn't rush the bra thing, most dr.'s say up to four months!
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So finally 3 weeks and 1 day P.O. I'm still...

So finally 3 weeks and 1 day P.O. I'm still trying to be happy and positive. I'm very sensitive to touch still and still achy in my muscles. Can't wear a bra, even my sports bra are e ginning to drive me nuts. Has anyone else noticed the sensitivity in your chest changed completely even the littlest pressure from a bra or shirt and it leaves red marks....kind of like when you wear clothes to tight but it does it even if its loose.....
I called my P.S about the bras and she said yes that's normal, but if at 6 weeks you still can't then we may have a problem.....I didn't feel very reassured at that moment and still don't. I see so many people with bras or bathing suits on..why is it so painful for me..... Hope everyone else is doing great!!!!!!


Hi Jamiery5, your boobies look completely awesome! the sensitivity and redness might be normal for the first 4-6 weeks as my ps told me..but I am having BA soon so I might have to expect that too :-(..but other than that, you look great! will be greater in bikini and tank top, upload more pics plzz! ;)
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How many cc's did you get? Are they silicone or saline?
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I got 440cc on both, although to me it doesn't look like it, they are Saline, submuscular, crease incision.

Hi everyone and hope you are all doing great!!! ...

Hi everyone and hope you are all doing great!!! I'm 4 weeks today....(never thought I'd make it this far) I went for my 1 month checkup, I'm doing ok, but I'm still extremely painfully sensitive to the touch, anything that touches me feels like fire burning me or razors cutting me....she says "sounds like nerves", I can't lean forward still, it hurts, I have to start massaging today, I've read so many people's ways they massage and mine is WAY different....I have to go about 2 inches up from my incision at the bottom of the implant and push to my ribs and hold for 10 seconds, do this 5 min. Each boob everyday.... I'm scared shitless I'm going to rupture it or hurt myself the office she made me try it, I started shaking and pouring sweat. I've tried to start enjoying them more, but I'm so painfully sensitive it sucks....I'm still not sleeping very well at all.....we just took in my 6 month old niece who is severely going through drug withdrawals, it's been very rough but I know God put her here for a reason.....sorry I'm rambling.....I know so e of my booby buddies are further than me so maybe you have some positive insight.....I do remember one of you telling me to do the lotion and Saran Wrap...I may try that tonight..... I haven't had time to shave let alone anything else..... 6 kids, 1 with so many medical problems, God Bless her little heart, work full time, trying to heal, having an endoscopy on march 5th.....we found out my company may be closing and going back to Europe, I can't even try to explain everything else......guess I just needed to vent.... Thx for listening!!!!!


Jamiery5, I've heard the sensitivity can last a while. The more you have to stretch, the more sensitive your skin is. Mine is horrible!!! I'm 11 days PO today and have been braless since day 1 PO with my PS's permission! I have tried numerous sports bras, and can't find one comfy enough. I live in cotton tanks!!! I tried my Lycra tanks and what a nightmare....they squeezed and rubbed and the whole outer part of both boobs were bright red!!! I won't make that mistake again. LOL. I know you work FT but if you can, go braless as much as possible. I know you have a ton of stress right now and it's easy for me to tell you to try to relax, but not always easy to do. Go look in the mirror, tell yourself you're beautiful and strong and you can get through anything that God puts out there for you!!! You must be a saint girl.....5 kidz plus 1! You can do this!!! And every day will get a little better! :)
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Hi Jamiery5! You look fantastic! Sorry you are going through so much right now. They say God doesn't give you more than you can handle so please try to stay positive. You sound like a very strong person so keep doing what you are doing. Big hug!!! We are all here for each other!!!
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I'm very interested to hear how everyone else does...

I'm very interested to hear how everyone else does their massages....

If you don't mind commenting that would be great!!!!

Thanks in advance!!!!!


I am always worried I'm not massaging right or long enough but mostly do in the shower. I think the most important thing is to "distort" the implant. My dr has me place thumb and fingers under breast and sort of squeeze but not hard and push up where you can see the implant rise on your chest. And I also try to move implant in all directions too this is suppose to keep from a contracture with scar tissue but sure you've heard that. I am almost at 3 weeks and still sensitive and still very firm will be nice when they are more like"real" boobs. Good luck with everything you look great!
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Sorry don't know why posted twice
Thank you jr7, and yes I'm still thinking I'm not doing it right...I've called my P.S ans she says I am, but it feels weird and I get very nervous doing it lol.....I just want to make sure I do everything I can to make them great and last!!!! Yes I 100% agree, I am 5 weeks this Friday and I still feel like there foreign objects, not "my boobs" there still very sensitive and I still can't sleep worth a crap either..... And I'm getting boob envy....uuughhh I swore I wouldn't wish I was bigger.......but I do :(

Hello all. I have to be quick, but I am 6 weeks...

Hello all. I have to be quick, but I am 6 weeks this Friday and mu incisions still hurt inside they have like a pulling, burning sensation inside,depending on the sports bra I have on, sometimes they are irritated looking, I have been putting neosporin on them.....but I wanted to know if anyone had pain by them this far into it... Ty in advance!!!!


I also still have soreness UNDER the incisions, so it's not the incisions themselves, but the internal suturing of the bottom of the pockets. I had a crease lowering due to constricted breasts and my right side is more crabby. This is what you might be experiencing.
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I'm six weeks and my incisions are through my areola and I still get pings and burning. I think it's common and just means healing. My incisions are covered, so I'm not sure about the redness. You can always call your ps and ask. It's what they are there for!
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Hello all, Hope everyone is doing great!! I...

Hello all, Hope everyone is doing great!! I finally love them, yes I am saying that.. I love them, I cant imagine not having them. I do have boob envy..uuugghhh but I am so happy to have the girls as a part of me. They no longer feel like foreign objects, they are my boobies!! They are not 100% soft but I can move them, squeeze them and everything else!! The only problem I have been having recently is that I am spitting sutures..has this happen to anyone else?? I see my P.S next week and I have already called, they said it was normal, but it does worry me and it can be painful at times.
Well I am sooooo happy to say that I love them and hope to have them for rmany, many years!!!!!! :) :) I look forward to any feedback about the stitiching!!!

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I forgot to ad, I am rippling some, I can feel my...

I forgot to ad, I am rippling some, I can feel my implant in the crease and in the cleavage area....that scares the crap out of me...


how are you doing lady??
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I'm four weeks PO and feeling like they are far apart. I seen you wrote that in one of your post, how are they looking now? Any closer once dropping?
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I'm almost 4months, 2 weeks post and I love mine too! I can sort of see the ridge when I'm laying on my back, but I don't worry about it. I can move them around and whatnot, though I can feel the gurgling, but I think it's normal. Doesn't worry me. Anyway, my main reason to post here today is to let you know that I still spit a stitch now and then. Though my scars are pretty much healed. Mine are like little white things and they come right out when I go after them. Only have had three come out of my incision on my breasts,(and my incision is around the top of my areola), but they haven't caused any problems. I'm just having problems dressing them. I want to show them off, but I don't want to come across as skanky, you know? LOL! Such problems!
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