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I'm 31 i have 2 kids a 14 & 1 yr old. i have...

I'm 31 i have 2 kids a 14 & 1 yr old. i have never had a gut until now &I don't like the rolls I see. I want a tummy tuck and fuller boobs. I feel disgusted when I see myself naked. I'm hoping when I get the tt and see a flat tummy that ill be motivated and take better care of my body. About 5 yrs ago I went from 220 to 160 I was happy and motivated started a new job had a new man and the lbs shed off, but I don't have the same motivation. after I had the baby i droped 40 lbs in a week but I became depressed and gained the weight back he would wake up every hr for a bottle so when he ate...I ate. I don't want anymore kids im happy with the two i have. I just want to get my body right so I can feel good about myself. I honestly never considered a tt till now cuz of the rolls and kangaroo pouch that never went away even when I dropped 60 lbs. as far as a boob job I was thinking about doing that for more than 5 yrs. I put a payment down to save the date for surgery or price for the surgery. I think my only concern is my back is killing me I don't know if its because my ass is so big and my waist is small or maybe could be something else so I don't know if I should add the boobs yet cuz won't it add more to my back problems? I'm thinking maybe start with the tt? one dr said I should wait cuz my waist will be smaller with the tt and lipo and will make my boobs look bigger. Everyone that I have told I want a boob job looks at me like I'm crazy and ask for what a reduction I'm like no to make em fuller these damn victoria secret bra add two cups help...lol. I'm tired of taking off my bra and my boobs look sad... I'm a 38D but not a full D I want full perky boobs!!! Does anyone have any suggestions on should I wait to do the boobs and just do my tummy.

So I have 7weeks to finish saving up money. Been...

So I have 7weeks to finish saving up money. Been trying to do ot on at least 1 of my days off. Idk what to do I know I have enough for the tt wich has now been more important to me then the ba. U say its better to just do both at the same time dr alexander is board certified and would do the boob and tt at the same time. So I'm wondering if I manage to save the money by may 2should I just do it or wait till sept when I can apply for Fmla in my job. Since I was out 9 months after the baby I don't have enough hrs to apply for it. I just returned to work in nov so I have to work n build hrs. Unless 2weeks vacation is enough to recover from both? I'm a bus operator and I sit all day unless I have a wheel chair passenger then I would have to get up and bend down to strap then in. I'm nervous I really wanna do this but now it's a matter of when!!!!
I been going back to the gym to try and lose these thunder thighs. Each leg is 31inches my ass is about 48 inches going around hip, waist is about 37& I'm 215, 5'5 some of me wants to lose weight but I read one dr wrote don't CUZ then it's more lose skin to cut if u lose weight?

Today is march 17, 2013 and I have found...

Today is march 17, 2013 and I have found motivation to go to the gym and work out. for the last 2 weeks i been going to the gym and walking alot instead of using my car. so ima postpone the surgery for may and give myself time to lose weight. And also to build hrs so I can get Fmla at work. I really want my body back and I'm motivated so today I weighed myself at 213 in oct I was 224 so I am going in the right direction but it feels like its taking so long though before I wasn't as motivated as I am now and I'm the type of person once I set my mind to do something I will do it!!! I've lost 60lbs before and I will try my best to do it again.

Well I'm happy to say im down to 209. I started...

Well I'm happy to say im down to 209. I started off at 224 in November but for awhile the weight stayed from 216-214! And wouldn't move so I'm happy it's moving in the right direction w a lil workouts here and there walking and eating less!!! I still want a tt but after I lose at least 30 lbs. in the mean time I'm gonna look for a place here in manhattan so I can be close to home anyone have any suggestions?

confused

So in oct I was 224 now between 204-207... I'm losing but slowly. I don't wanna do the tummy tuck yet cuz I'm still heavy but I wanna do the boob job NOW. My friend said why go threw recovery two times. I said maybe it would give me a boost to lose more weight cuz I am unhappy w what I see. Im depressed the more depress i get the more i eat. And we don't have sex like we use to its like once every two weeks or once a week. I use to love to f##k but now I hate being naked n I don't initiate any more. Sex life has become boring. I wanna feel good about myself again. I feel unsexy and unwanted!!! Help what should I do

Looking around

So my bday is coming up in sept and for my 32nd bday I want nice perky boobs to give me a boost of confidence. It's something I really want n can't stop thinking about.
I have a quote from someone in florida but now on wed I have two schedule apt for a dr in manhattan wanna see if maybe its better to stay close to home n recover at home depending on how big a difference the price is. In florida it's 4500 for saline breast aug n lift. If in manhattan it was let's say 6000. I would just consider doing it here with a board certified dr. If its 8000 I would obviously wanna go to florida.
My man is still against it but its my body and I'm not happy. I'm healthy and young, so y not.

2 consiltations

so yesterday before work I went to see 2 drs. 1 Dr said for 18000 he would do the tummy tuck and the boob augmentation. both doctors said that I do not need a boob lift but one doctor suggested silicone and the other suggested saline. the one that suggested saliene said I need to lose 20 pounds b4 I do tt for better results but the boobs can be done now for 8900.
I really like that doctor but I think 8900 is a lot now if I was to do it in Florida for both the tt and ba would be a total of 9500.
My friend refered me to her dr she used n she is pleased w her results. I'm thinking should I do one surgery at a time here in ny or go to Florida

starting w the boobs

since I went to two doctors here in New York for consultations and they both said I do not need a lift because my skin is not sagging it's just there not full. both ps wanted about $9000.
I think that's a lot. my friend who got hers done in Florida is very happy with hers and once again she was the one who recommended me to him. so I sent my pictures too the doctor in Florida for a revaluation they said they would bring it down from $4,550 to 3, 500 w out the lift. I'm thinking I can always do the lift another time if I decide to do the tummy tuck but as of right now I've been going back to the gym and I'm going to stick to it
I've lost 60 pounds in 2008 but went back up w pregnancy then post partum. Since oct i lost 20 lbs n managed to keep it off. so what's another 25lbs. the doctor said it didn't matter if I did my boobs now because I have very lil fat there so it wouldn't affect if I lost weight. once they get back to me tomorrow to verify that the amount is with anesthesia in total, then I plan to book my surgery with them.
I'm really excited I want to get this done I see everyone's picture and how nice there's came out and it only makes me more eager to get mine done.

ftont vs side

I hate how the picture makes my boobs look bigger than they actually are from the front view and the side view you can tell they're small

Drop 21lbs

Yay down to 203 down 21lbs now. been going to the gym 4days a week n eating better. thinking if I get pass the 200 mark and enter the 100's I will do my surgery in October for sure. Def wanna do the boob job but indecisive about tummy tuck???

down 25 lbs

Down 25 lbs now 199 from 224 still confused cuz of money situation. I saved up to get the boob job n tt... but i dont have enuff for airefare hotel money for food meds and so forth. Ugh I'm so close but so far. Were suppose to go to Florida for graduation on December 14th so I figured I would try and get it done then so that it wouldn't be a waste of a trip I'm still looking forward to doing the ba,
but now that I'm losing weight I'm still thinking about just holding off on tt
I have been going to the gym at least 4 times a week and I see that my stomach is shrinking. I wish I knew the answer on what to do. cuz I believe if I have the money right now I would do it all at one time
part of me says just get the boobs done because since I'm going to the gym and actually see results maybe I'll lose more once I have the boob job

1month till surgery

so I set a date for my surgery it will be 12/6/13.
I lost 25lbs trying to lose another 5lbs b4 the surgery.
My best friend is gonna go w me to Florida I'm excited n nervous.
I been researching on here and love everyone's results. I'm just hoping I get good results as well. I applied for fmla at work n I hope I get approved so I can stay out and recover. Keeping my fingers crossed

3weeks till surgery

3weeks to go b4 surgery...
Plane tickets purchased
Booked my hotel
Starting to pack things lil by lil.
Starting to lose sleep cuz I'm thinking too much

2 weeks

2weeks till surgery
Starting to pack and put things to the side.
I'm nervous n my bf doesn't want me to do it. Says he doesn't want nothing to happen to me and he dw me to look like betty boop. So ill be going w my bff for the first couple of days then he will go a couple of days latter cuz he can't get the time off of work. I just pray every thing goes well.
I see everyone's results n I feel confident my results will ne good too.

1week

1week to go b4 I'm on the flat side and have nice boobs like how my boobs look in a bra but with out one as much as I love Victoria Secrets I am tired of wearing the bombshell add 2 cups!!!!

I can't wait I hope I get good results like some of use that I see on here

nov 29

Pics from today

200lbs

tired of seeing all the excess loose skin around my stomach

5days till the big day

5days till the big day. I can honestly say I don't feel nervous. I guess it hasn't hit me yet but I'm hoping that when the day comes my blood pressure doesn't go up or anything crazy happens.
I want everything to go well.
I keep taking pictures so that I will have plenty of before pictures because if I am going to do this procedure and spend almost $10,000 I want to make sure that I can look back to how i was before...to help motivate me and so that I won't make the same mistake again and hopefully with this procedure it will make me feel sexy again and help me more into the gym.I have been going for the past couple of months four times a week.
I lost 25 pounds but my stomach always stays with the loose skin the only thing I guess I'm concerned about is packing.
I want to make sure that I have everything &at the same time I do not want to over pack.
is the procedures done I will focus on my arms and legs in the gym as well as my abs. I am still young only 32 so I'm hoping to get myself together before I hit 35!!! Cuz 40 is creeping up!!!

me

someone special made me realize that it doesn't really matter who sees this. Im doing this for me.... I am NOT a famous movie star so it's not like I have to worry about paparazzi's lol so here I give you some pictures of me now and from before

me

2days

2days before surgery. ...
Took yesterday off spent thw morning w my bf. He is still upset im going threw w this.
I also went to get pamperd and try to relax my body before the big day.
Took today off to be w my man cuz he's not going w me.he can't take the time off.
my bff will be going w me n my son. Plus I have to finish packing n getting myself ready for tom. we leave really early in the morning. Then I go for my first face to face consiltation.
I'm getting nervous idk what to ask.
All I know is I want silicone but when the doctor saw pictures. He said that I need a lift and they would not do the surgery without the lift.
I feel I don't need it but they said when I get there they will let me know cuz pics are a lil diff then seeing someone in person. ..
I had went to two consultations with two different doctors before and both of them said I do not need it. If he says that I do not need the lift....then I'm willing to spend the extra thousand on silicone rather than saline. I really don't know what's the best? anybody has opinions on it please feel free to tell me

Tom is the big day

Tom is the big day! At 8am I am nervous.
He said I need a lift and he will put 390cc that sounds like a lot to me...
I'm trying to enjoy my day at florida took my son to the pool. Now about to take a nap then gonna go out latta to eat cuz once midnight comes no food for me and who knows how my appetite will be the next couple of days.
I saw the dr but couldn't really think of questions to ask this is all becoming surreal....

3 more hrs

and two more hours I will be having surgery and can't seem to sleep. I guess my body is making every excuse to me reasons not to do it. Keep asking myself why am I doing this leave my boobs alone stay the way you are.
I miss my bf and I wish he was here w me.

I'm going in

The time Is now... marked n ready
now I lay me down to sleep... I pray the lord my soul to keep...but if I die before I wake.... I pray the lord my soul to take
Amen

day 1

So after surgery I was pale all the nurses were worrying. Lucky I brought crackers n juice it helped a lil but not with being nauseous.
My titis feel like two rocks. They hurt n are heavy
I been getting in and out of bed it hurts but I gotta do it.
2 times I almost peed myself cuz this stuff is so tight. Guess it's. Sqweezing my bladder by the time I pull my psnties down its comming out.
I'm getting ready to see the dr in a hr and half weeks. Let me see if I can take pics because right now I'm wrapped like a chicken caesar wrap. Can't see anything from what I can see my boobs still look small :'(
Maybe its cux I have Frankenstein boobs maybe one that goes away and they drop it will be bigger I don't know?
Hope they did it right because I don't want to go through this again

day 1 pix

Boobs is not what I expected I thoiguht they would be bigger
I guess it's because I'm going through the frankenstein stage of the passes maybe will drop n then they will look bigger I don't know

day 2

on day two still walking around like Grandma with a bad back. Get nauseous every now and again.my boobs still look the same small but they feel like rocks on top of me. I keep dozing in at out of sleep. it feels numb on my lower abdomen
Also feels tight. I don't know what is but when I play w my phone or ipad I get sleepy I put it down I'm awake. I want to take a shower but I'm too scared that I might pass out

day 2pics

my lil one

This one keeps me busy n my bff is helping me w him. I feel bad I can't pick him up or hold him.... he's looking at me like y my mommy not hiving me attention. :'(

day 3

I am a strong independent woman so being like this and feeling helpless I hate the feeling.
Today I took a shower.... it was a workout & a half. Cuz I feel week my back is tight. I can't stand up straight... plus I got the drain hanging out on the side. It gets annoying. ... but I couldnt take it anymore I wanted my hair and my nana clean!!!!
After that I relaxed a lil then got dressed w the help of my bff and we strolled jr by the beach about 6long blocks looking for food & milk for jr. I felt like I did to much and felt swollen so we took a cab back. Just slept 2hrs!!! I slept good even though I did have some bad dreams. Can't wait for fri so they can take the drain out!!!!
I hope I ain't pop a stitch cuz I dont know how to sit my ass down n stay still. Jan 31.... I gave birth to my son the next day I asked to be released from the hospital. I was hopping out the hospital people were in disbelief I had just given birth to a 10lb baby boy. The 2nd day I took all the clothes to the cleaner across from my house n did laundry by myself. They thought I was nuts.
I felt so good I told my hubby lets go I'm ready to fuck. He said the dr said none for 2weeks.... his ass ain't last not even 5days then gave in... lol
I hate being in pain but I think i m pretty strong. For those of u havong this kind of sx I strongly suggest u bring someone w u. I paid for my bff flight n we stsying in the same hotel m we share food expenses. The nurse in Florida wanted 400 @night I font have that kinda money sorry.
Let me tell u I'm dying to wax but for eye brow alone is 17-$20 wtf in ny I pay $5-$6 guess ima have yo do it wed or thurs cuz my honey is coming fri & I wanna feel pretty

day 3

day 4

Managed to take a shower by myself. That was a workout....
Then Went out to cvs with my son and bff. Just. ..just walking around the store drained all my energy
But I am feeling better as each day passes.

day 5

Went this morning to get my eyebrows waxed and my hair done n got food i had took a cab by myself..n i wore myself out. Came to the hotel n took a nap. Then went w my bff n her cousin to take her to the airport. Then went to cvs for some stuff. I can go out n walk but it takes a lot out of me. I'm using my own garment I bought sleeping w it and using it night n day... I can get on the bed on all 4s but its still a pain to get up cuz my stomach and boobs hurt.
Cant wait for fri to take out this drain its annoying!!!!
I keep buying surgical pads to cover my boobs n my belly button and to put over the drain
I cut it in the middle and make a hole to put it around the drain cuz it tends to leak maybe ill take a pic tomorrow so u can see what I mean as for now I'm going to bed
gn

day 6

Can't wait for tomorrow. I'm hoping n praying they take the drain out tomorrow. It is very annoying to sleep with. Last night I tried to lay on my side but it hurts cuz I can stretch.my lower stomach feel funny like it's numb but at the same time sensitive. Went out to joes crab shack and enjoyed the beautiful weather. I still can't walk up straight but I'm moving around a little quicker than before!!!

day 6 more pics

Love this

I been using this for as long as I can rem its one of my fav... It don't cost much and helps a lot!!! I been using this on and off as well as the garment the dr gave me wich I feel does nothing. This works wonders but I gotta be careful with the drain there's another garment I bought I haven't tried it on yet but when I do and if I like it I'll post a pic
Good night sweet dreams

Drain out

Went to the dr today they took out the drain.
Didn't hurt felt like something slithering out...
I told the dr I wasn't happy w the size of my boobs.... he said in 6 months if I'm not happy to get bigger implants huh? I ain't going threw this again
The pic I posted is of someone on here who got her's done and I love her results. Hope she doesn't mind me sharing her gorgeous results.
See the dr wanted me to do the lift I didn't want it and now I feel like I have two lil tight perky titis
Ok ok ok
I will try and give it some time to see the end results... I pray that in the end I will be happy cuz Idw go threw this again!!!
Left ft Lauderdale now in Daytona gonna get ready for bed the mr is here.... I haven't seen him in 9 days and the nurse said no sex only oral ugh how rude lol
Gn sweet dreams

sex sex sex

Yay sex finally after like 10 days none!!!!
It was a bit uncomfortable being stitched up but my horny ass is happy now. He finally touched my boobs I made em massage them while sexing n it felt great. He was scared. He said he didn't wanna break or hurt his new toys!!! Lol
im getting use to the boob size n massaging them hurts n feels good at the same time!!!
Im a lil worried cuz the tape under right boob is a lil loose and I can see the stitch irk should I go to the Dr and ask them to look at it ideal an infection or anything?

today day 8

boob day 8 going into day 9

day 9

Its our last night in Daytona tomorrow I head back home to new york. we drove to Fort Lauderdale to see the doctor one last time before I head back home because the right boob was irritated and was oozing a little bit of green.
the girl cleaned them then re tape it.
the only issue I have right now is that it seems like one side of my hip is bigger than the other. I don't know if it's because one side is more swollen than the other or did they cut it wrong lol I don't know

home sweet home

home sweet home after being in florida for 2 weeks....
im back to ny
I am beyond exhausted we got to the airport at 4 p.m.our flight was supposed to leave at 7 didn't leave till 1030 just getting in the door now. I am so happy to see my bed. I'm also happy that my boobs are starting to drop and look bigger. I don't know if it was because of the plane ride I guess I'll find out tomorrow. because the Dr said that the plane ride might make them swollen.
I still can't walk straight at times I feel like the stitches inside of my tummy are keeping me hunch down. I'm just curious if anyone else feel this and if so when does this go away? am I supposed to be stretching.

2week

Today I went for my 2week post op check up. They took out my stitches on my tummy n belly button. I wanted to donkey kick the dr lol. It hurt....

2week pics

job xmas party

I am beat. Went to my job xmas party. Got a lot of compliments and took a lot of pics!!!

job xmas party 12/21/13

my guy bff superman

This man has been there for me the last five yrs. He is always there when I need someone to talk to and he never judges me. I am lucky to have him in my life...

merry xmas

Merry Christmas ladies. Hope u guys enjoy the day. Love u all

Xmas 2013

Xmas

xmas

3 weeks

Wow 3weeks have past. I feel pretty good. Boobs are dropping. Im content w my results. Im happy I have the time off of work cuz my grandpa is in the hospital he's pace makers battery is dying. So Im on my way now w my family on a road trip making each other nuts.
I want to see him he lives in Boston n I haven't been there in like 10 yrs.
Im excited yo see everyone my mom has a total of 15 brothers and sisters at least 8of them live in Boston!!!

happy grandpa is okay

just got home from visiting my grandfather we spend two days in Boston and I was happy to see him and happy that he is OK

1month latta

I was supposed to get my stiches out from my boobs fri but there was a snow storm now gotta wait till tomorrow.
My tummy im happy w lithium bit my boobies one looks different then the other. Size wise I still wish they were bigger. But still got a while before I see the final results. ..

Gym

Can't wait to start the gym again I'm hoping if I lose more weight will help to make me look more proportioned I hate my jumbo thunder thighs but that I won't take the easy way out I will continue to work on that myself. Maybe I'll go to the gym tom and start on the bike? How long did they say not to work out for I already forgot

boobs

boobs jan 10,2014

jan 10

Back to work full duty after 45 days off
glad I took all this time..
the tummy takes longer for recovery...
I feel good w my results... though at this point still wish my boobies were a lil bigger. . N

work

I Drive a bus snd being back to work is tiring im coming down with a cold and kept sneezing omg it hurts like hell....
I was so tired after work cuz I had to wake up at 330am to be at work ny 5am when I got home was 3pm I knocked out by 5pm I was so tired I drooled lmao..
feels good to be back and making money...
and from being active going back to work I lost 2 pounds. Im down to 196
Making it now a total of 28 pounds lost!!!

back to the gym

Went back to the gym day 1 after a 9hr shift. Im beyond exhausted. Time for bed hope all u lovely ladies are alright!!!!

down 30 lbs

Its been a long journey but im now down 30lbs.
I was at my highest 224 oct 2012...
Oct 2013 I was 200.. I went down to 199 but the day of surgery I think I was 202 anyway after surgery I stayed at 198
now im down to 194lbs
Total of 30 pounds GONE
Now 20lbs to go I want my thunder thighs gone!!!

the diference

day 7

Day 7 back to the gym feels good I lost 5lbs in a week
Im 193 from 224
now 31 lbs gone.
Last week I gave MYSELF a goal lose 10lbs before feb 20
Out of the 10 I lost 5
I guess being back to work n going to the gym is making lbs just shedd off cuz im not just sitting home doing nothing!!!
I feel great!! I still feel n look swollen but not much guess cuz im doing so much.

jan 26

7weeks

12days lost 6lbs

so I must say I'm a little excited in the last 12 days that I have went back to work and back to the gym I have lost 6 pounds. Making it now a total of 32 pounds gone and that is now 6 out of the 10 pounds that I would like to lose by February 20. I have made a goal and set a time line and I'm sticking to it.
Though im happy for the company of u lovely ladies I am saddened that my own bf doesn't aknowledge me. ..
or compliment me

over the yrs

i apologize but need to vent

yesterday I asked my boyfriend why is it that he can pay everybody else a compliment but not me. He Had nothing to say.
I got ready we went out.
My bf opened up and said i aint gonna front i feel our relationship was better before jr came along but i wouldnt trade him for the world i love u and our boys. Ur the mother of my kid ill always love u. I said u love me ur not in love with me i been with u five yrs u never ask me to marry u... ur looking for someone better than me. HE said no. I said bull shit thats y i aint having no more kids it puts a toll on our relationship plus u dont wanna settle down with me y am i gonna keep popping out babies....
then His boy came and was complaining about his girlfriend's saying that she pretends that she has a job BUT she doesn't. I commented that I couldn't be without a job because I can't see me depending on a man. I said if he leaves mean tomorrow I'll be alright.we were in the lounge standing up my feet started to hurt so i sat down. I could see my boyfriend but he couldn't see me and I was watching him stare at this beautiful woman like he want to f*** her. I asked him. do you see what u like. Do you want to go over there and get her number. HE said I don't know what you're talking about. I said don't play stupid. He said come lets go home so I can fuck u. I said im good what u wanna fuck me for so u can think about this bitch im good. I never turn my bf down for sex even when im mad but im tired of his tricks n reverse pyscolgy bull shit...
he was drunk so I drove home. The whole car ride home I didn't say not a word. When we got home I was getting ready for bed he grab his keys saying I dont need him any more I wad leaving. Im tired of always being the one that reassures him I want to be with him. He should f****** show me that he wants to be with me. Since he's the one always messing up. He is so insecure and I never got it till last night he always wants me to fight for him. But who's fighting for me. I went down jumped in my car to buy the baby milk he was sitting in his truck when I got back he was gone. I slept two hrs then woke up and couldn't sleep. I called he aint answer im wondering is he with another chick so help me god im changing the locks. I drove 40 min at 330 in the morning n found him at his moms sleeping on the sofa.
Im tired of dreaming hes cheating. Tired of him being insecure that he cant love me like I want to be loved and deserve to be loved. Sometimes I feel like this is as good as it will get cuz all men cheat all men get tired of there lady... look at beyond she's gorgeous jer man tired of her ass too. mens see it like eating chicken everyday who doesn't get tired of eating chicken everyday. Some of me wants to end it so I can find happiness n find a dude that can lick n f this poom poom real good.
I need a good fuck lmao its been a hot minute. Sorry im getting personal but I gotta laugh so I dont cry. Cuz im upset with my life when this is my moment to be happy I have come a long way... hes stealing my joy...
I apologize again for venting

Update from yesterday

Thank u ladies for responding I will respond one by one in a minute but just wanted to give a quick update...
So he came home and we talked he said he was feeling insecure cuz I lost a lot of weight and had the surgery and he feels I'm tired of him cuz he's the fat one now. He said I feel like ur the one who wants to do u. Cuz ur tired of me.
That is so far from the truth I love this man with all of me even through the toughest times I have always stuck by him.
I said u feel that way and I always feel like ur looking for better. I feel once ur moms house is back in order u will leave and move over there. I feel u stay cuz u don't wanna be away from jr. I have a lot on my mind but u never care to listen or open up.
He said I want to buy my moms house and for us to live as a family. I said I refuse to move.... From where I feel secure to live and play house in Long Island I'm a queens girl. I would move if u married me cuz then u would be showing me ur ready to settle down. I said but even then I hate all ur female friends that u use to be with they live so close by.
he said forget them I don't talk to them, so let's move to florida I said no way.

He said if u don't wanna go that's fine
I won't leave u but I do wanna buy my mothers house. For our future n for our son. That he don't wanna leave his mom alone in that big house. Tears came down and he said he's scared of losing his mom and me cuz we are the only ones who truly love him.
I still don't understand why is it so hard for him to marry me?
and I ask him what the hell is wrong with me but he just said he has thought about it. Wtf is there to think I have been ur rock since day one... Guess he's waiting for me to continue to get tired of the bull shit till I leave him and it will be his loss cuz I'm strong and hard working and I have a heart of gold...
Well it's a step in the right direction that I he is opening up on how he feels.
I told myself I want all negative things out my life so I'll give it another year and see if it gets better or worse. Cuz I can't waste all my young days on him. He's 28 I'm 32...
But I will be going to the gym and getting my bikini body together!!!!

190 from 224

more pics

Idk y the pics dont wanna upload but here are recent pics from today actually.
Im happy the scale is still going in the right direction!!!
34 lbs gone
hoping to lose another 20- 30 lbs

pics feb 20

pretty hurts

to all my beautiful women on here if you read this please buy Beyonce's new album it comes with the video pretty hurts.... must see and listen... weather we are big or small we all have insecurities.

pretty hurts, shine the light on whatevers worse, perfection is a disease of a nation pretty hurts
trying to fix something but you can't fix what you can see its the soul that need the surgery ain't got no doctor or pill that can take the pain away the pain inside and nobody frees you from your body.

even though I believe this song is true I feel like we can still fix ourselves to make our self feel better

just want to let you all know that you are not the only one feeling this way. And I hope after you do your surgery you all feel better and work on your confidence.

bff bday

today is my best friend's birthday.even though at times she drives me crazy she is the best.she was the one who went with mean when I get my surgery done and stayed with me and my son. I am very grateful to have he in my life I don't know what I would do without her

March 4

Boobs still look high
tummy is flat but dont like the back fat.
Still going to the gym but dont know if it will go away

found my measurments from july 2012

today I found my measurements from July 2012 and it made me feel really good about myself. I have come a long way

Motivational

3months

From 224 managing to stay at 190
One boob looks still high n the other is rounding out

If u go to dr be careful

Saw on the news a girl getting a tummy tuck in florida died. It's crazy. I seen a lot of people go to dr for procedures... I could have did mine to with Fatima almonte...
But I wanted to be in the states.
There's a difference going out of the states they do not have the same laws...rules and regulations....
Here may be a lil more expensive but worth it and if god forbid something happens u can go back to were u went. Here in ny
I had went to manhattan they wanted $18,000
In florida I paid like $10,000
And that was for both tummy n boob w lift n implants.

The only regret I have is not going bigger on the boobs n being cheap n doing saline... Ok technically I wasn't being cheap I just didn't have the patience to wait I wanted it done be 4 Xmas n I was a 1000 short.
We live n we learn. Everyday I try to do some workouts squats jumping jacks sit ups walking anything is better than nothing when I can't make it to the gym.
At this point it's been 3weeks n I'm maintaing at 190 not going up or down.
I got a new schedule starting April 6. I'm hoping the scale will start moving downward. Cuz I'll be taking the train and leaving the car at home!!!!
All is well here hope all u ladies are ok xoxo
Here are Some pics n quotes for motivation!!!!

typo above

I meant to say a girl getting a tummy tuck and the Dominican Republic died not Florida. This stupid phone acts up sometimes

35lbs gone

35 lbs gone... Finally after 3weeks stuck at 190... now I'm down to 189 from 224.
they say in order to make the scale move.. you have to trick your body... do dif things so I started taking the bus n train to work. instead of driving my car and having door to door service so that I can burn extra calories...
But I been kinda cheatin. eating certain things I know I shouldn't be eating the only person I'm cheating is myself..
but am I really supposed deprive myself... idk all I know summertime is almost here.... and I need to get that scale moving in the right direction so I will try and watch what I eat.
hope all you beautiful ladies are doing well on your journey
Timothy alexander

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You sound great!
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Thanks ava n u look fantastic. .. keep it up
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Woop woop that's amaze balls
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Lol thanks maybe if I stop eating junk. It will move more
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Congrats on having the scale move! I have been plateaued for 4 months now. I don't think my body wants to go any lower. Try zig-zagging your calories (google it). It's amazing and the high days make you feel like you're having cheat days :)
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Thanks I will look into that
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I've sent you a email hunny
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Thank u.
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Very nice girl. I love the inspiration, so on point! So sad to hear someone died having surgery, it's just sad, no words.
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It's crazy u think ur going in and gonna FEEL sexier n u dont even see the results.. i think thats y my mom n my man were so against me doing it. Yhey didn't wanna lose me
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Of course not! There are inherent dangers in simple things, let aline surgery! It's super important to go with a board certified dr, even in the DR, they have board certified dr's too, and they cost a little more too. In Fl. If you're a dr You can preform plastic surgery, that's why you HAVE to check credentials. We are blessed girl!
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I feel bad n those drs are like oh well I got paid. On to the next one... Cuz u can't sew them right?idk all I know is im glad I went w the dr I did. I have only small complaints. But that goes w out saying we are our own worse critics.
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Looking super hot I love the definition on tummy it looks great!! Do you breath in when taking pics? Or breath out? Just a quick question as I still breath in when I look in a mirror habit of many years I think
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Lmao thanks I just stand straight n tall not hunched over like before. I hate that one side is perfect then on the other side looks a little weird feels like they took more than that on one side and made it more curvier than the other. before I leave uses do sit ups so I think that help define me. It u look at some of my before pics I was defined surrounded by fat. Lmao I probably would be more fit if I didn't LOVE BUTTER BAGELS SO MUCH im gonna try n stay away from that. How have u been maintaining w ur weight im stuck at 190 for more then 2weeks
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I'm around 180pound iv put on around 10lbs since tt I'm currently on ww but this week have tried 3day chem diet to kick my arse!! Will see tomos when I weigh chick
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What is 3 day chem its yoo early for me im a lil slow
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It's a diet that is chemically break down diet Scientific proven.. Loose around 7-10 pound in 3days.. What's your email addy Hun I will send it to you
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Thanks ill message u my email
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Thanks for the info
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you look gorgeous!! I really love the results I have a question if you don't mind me asking what was your bra zise before because im thinking of getting a boob job just don't know what size yet.
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Thank u The funny thing is im still the same bra size 36/ 38d I didn't buy any new bras yet I guess they just made my boobs fuller and higher. I wanted like a dd Some days im happy w the boobs other times I wish I did them bigger I got saline 390 filled to 420
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Thanks so much for answering and they do look nice amd a lot fuller.
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Uw feel free to ask me anything you want? I do not get offended or take anything personal. I appreciate you commenting on my page because we are our own worst critics. And like I said the only thing I regret is I kinda wish I had them bigger!!! I love boobs lol
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thanks!! I love boobs too lol
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Hey lady, glad to see you're doing fine! Thanks so much for the motivation :)
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