Tomorrow is the big day! I'm super nervous and...
Tomorrow is the big day! I'm super nervous and excited at the same time. For the past week I've been having bad dreams about the surgery, with each dream ending in me being completely unsatisfied with the size. I hope I get the result I want. Don't want to have that boobie greed afterward lol.
My stats: height 5'3, weight125
*promise to add more photos throughout my recovery
I had my BA yesterday. My PS said he would go as...
I had my BA yesterday. My PS said he would go as big as he could and so when I got out of surgery I found out that I got 400cc. Before the surgery he told me that most likely he wouldn't be able to go past that size, so I'm a little diappointed but overall I'm glad he went with that size. Because to be honest, I could not imagin how painful it would be with bigger implants. Right now my muscles are extremely tight, especially at night and in the morning. It's only been today that I've been able to move enough to get to the computer.
I had my post op today and my boyfriend went with me and got a sneak peek of the new boobs and he said they look really good. I know I wanted really big boobs, but now that I have these I think they suit my body well. They dont look super fake, and they're light enough to not feel too top heavy. I know they will get smaller once the swellling goes down but thats ok.
Im getting some bad side effects. I think im allergic to the antibotics. Will write more... feeling extremely nauseous. Gotta lay down...
So it turns out that I had an allergic reaction to...
So it turns out that I had an allergic reaction to some antibiotics I was taking before my surgery. Yesterday it got really bad, and I woke up from a nap with huge red welts developing on my arms and legs. It wasn't till around 9pm that my boyfriend was able to convince me to go to the ER. I went and got a shot of Benadryl and was prescribed prednisone (a life saver!!) to help combat the allergic reaction. So today is my second day post op. Im having less pain and today I will start weaning off the vicodin. I was taking it every 4-5 hours after my surgery, but the discomfort is significantly less today. My chest is still tight and my right implant feels about 1-2cm higher than the left but thats okay because I know they both still need to drop. I dont have a compression band on and I still haven't recieved orders to start any kind of massages yet. Btw that anti-nausuea medicine works pretty well but I've only needed it once to take before the prednisone. Which was only due to my allergy. Really wish I could take a shower, but my boyfriend has been great giving me sponge bath. Friday I will attempt to shower on my own. We'll see how that goes... Still have no idea what size I am or will be.
Today is my 3rd day post up. I'm now able to use...
Today is my 3rd day post up. I'm now able to use my arms more without a lot of pain. I was able to make the bed for the first time since my surgery. I'm still trying to take it easy. So far I'm staying off the pain meds, but I'm still taking my antibiotics as usual. The tightness is slowly getting better. I woke up today feeling much better than the past two days. My appetite is returning back to normal and I'm not feeling much discomfort, although my back is beginning to ache a bit. Still not used to the extra weight I guess lol. I'm trying not to hunch over but it's a little difficult not to. I do notice that the upper pole does seem just a tiny bit softer. Im sure there are more changes to come. Sorry for the lack of photos... Still trying to figure out how to upload them.
Today is my 4th day post op. I'm feeling better...
Today is my 4th day post op. I'm feeling better everyday it seems. I'm able to do a lot more than I could at the beginning of the week. Luckily Im not experiencing much discomfort, so I'm only taking the antibiotics at this time. No more pain meds for me. In pictures I think I look like a full C, but they definitely seem bigger in person. The swelling is continuing to go down and I guess everyday I get closer to seeing what my actual size will end up being. Still hoping to measure at a D cup, but I'm sure I will be between a C/D depending on the brand of bra I'll use. Still not 100% comfortable with going back to work (requires some heavy lifting), so I'm going to give myself a few more days of rest. And in case anyone was interested in knowing... I completely do not regret my decision to get a BA. I finally feel like I have the feminine body I've always wanted (aside from a few extra pounds I could stand to lose lol). But ultimately, this is the best gift I've ever given myself!
I am now 16 days post op. Let me start by saying...
I am now 16 days post op. Let me start by saying that I feel great!! A few days ago I got my stitches taken out and I was amazed to see that the scars are nearly non-existent! I was shocked when my doctor took off the bandages. You can hardly see any scars and there is absolutely no bruising or discoloration. My doctor was happy to see my progress and said that my cleavage is looking really good. He also gave me directions on how to start massaging the implants. I've come to notice that my right breast is still a little higher than my left. So Iwill start the massages tonight and hopefully the right will drop a little more soon. They feel softer everyday. I love waking up and taking a quick feel to see how they are coming along. I don't think I have much dropping left to do. Now just waiting for the fluff lol. I hope that they get a little bigger once they fluff... Hey that boob greed got me too!! But overall I love them. They are easy to cover up, but look big without clothes on. So I'm happy once I get home and I can let them breathe lol. I'm looking to buy my first real bra, maybe I'll try VS. Anybody have any suggestions?? Well to wrap it up... I have no pain, very minimal scarring but just a little tenderness inach boob. I can sleep on my side but that morning boob is still a killer! Also I'm very sensitive to the cold (wink wink) wasn't like that before. And yes the bf loves them too... I'm a happy girl! :D
Went to get measured at Victoria Secret today. I...
Went to get measured at Victoria Secret today. I know there sizes run small but I thought wth I'll just go anyway since I don't have a measuring tape at home. So the lady there measured me at a 32DD. Does that even exist? Lol. Then I went to another department store to explore both C and D cups. I couldn't even get the 34C on because it was just way too small. I tried on a 34D and I still felt like I was spilling out. I'm not sure but I feel like after beig flat chested for so many years, I still look at mysef as being small chested. The other day I tried on some tanks at Kohls and was super surprised to see how big they looked. And I wasn't wearing any bra... Well anyway I feel a bit frustrated about this sizing stuff and hope I can get my real size once they do some fluffing.
49 Days Post OP (Drop and Fluff)
10 Jun 2013
2 months post
Hey ladies, I'm happy to say that I have been progressing well. For a while my right breast was higher than my left, but over time it has dropped nicely and is no longer noticeably higher. As far as the fluffing, YES they have gotten very soft and my boyfriend always seems amazed at how REAL they feel. Silicone was a good choice for me because I really wanted to have that natural feel. And I'm happy to say that I have D&F!! The last time I was measured at a 32DD, and those bras are practically impossible to find in store. So I decided to experiment with sizes and am happy to say that I comfortably fit a 34D. Yes, I do believe that once they D&F, they got a little bit bigger. I think that as my muscle started to loosen up, the implant was able to fill out more. I've tried 34C bras and they do not fit. I must say I was relieved because I really wanted my D cup! In a 34C my boobs pop out a ridiculous amount... So I'd say that I can go with a C for a more boobalicious look, but I cant wear it for too long because my boobs get super squished and indented from the small cups. As far as exercise, I'm slowly trying to get back to my routine but for now I'm only doing cardio and lower body exercises. And I must admit that my back does hurt often because of the extra weight of my new additions. Now I'm more concerned about support. I was freaked out to notice that the sports bra I was wearing actually left marks on my shoulders... So I knew I had to find something more supportive. These bras I got from target were only $13 and they give me good coverage as well as feel comfortable around the bottom of my implants. Going from sports bra to underwire makes a big difference visually but I still prefer the sports bra when it comes to comfort. The scars are healing well and are more concealed since my breasts have dropped. So let me just say that so far I'm loving them!! They have boosted my confidence a lot. After nearly 25 years of being a 34A... It's almost unreal to be buying 34D bras!
17 Jun 2013
2 months post
Hey everyone! Thought I'd give a quick review on the bras that I've been using. My last post I mentioned some bras I got from Target. That was actually the first day that I used it and I wore it to work. Omg, that under-wire was killing me after a few hours. It was digging into my ribs and for days after I felt soreness under my breasts. I think I wore the strap too tight. Now I wear it at the middle or last notch, and it helps so much! The good thing about them is that it gives me good cleavage, and it has just a light amount of padding. It's hard getting used to this back pain, which is why I still like to go bra-less when I can, especially at night. Haven't yet explored many other bra brands yet. Any recommendations would be much appreciated :) Will add more pics soon! Happy healing!!
About 5 months PO
15 Sep 2013
5 months post
Hey all, I'm doing really well. The swelling has gone down quite a lot and they are looking and feeling much more natural. I do wish that I had gone with 500cc's as opposed to the 400 because I sometimes feel envious of larger chested women (yes even post op!). But I suppose that's natural. They still look good though. I finally feel like I have the feminine body I was always meant to have... Love 'em!!
8 Feb 2014
10 months post
Today I found out I have cc. Revision surgery is eminent and will be done by end of June.
Facing the Reality of Corrective Surgery
26 Feb 2014
10 months post
Everything was fine after my surgery last year. Recovery went well. They looked good and the healing process went smoothly to say the least. My breasts were asymmetrical before surgery so for a long time I took no note of the slow changes happening to my right breast. And I must admit I quit massaging them probably before I should have. In other words, I was so excited to have my new look that I started to overlook their feel. So it made sense that my boyfriend was the one who caught on to something that seemed abnormal... I have actually lost over ten pounds since my surgery so I thought that the firmness was just due to fat loss. Then I made the realization that my right breast was no longer feeling like the left. Slowly it looks more and more contracted. Honestly, I cried for hours. I cried discussing the new unexpected cost of my capsulectomy surgery with the patient coordinator. I choked up in front of my boyfriend when I saw in the waiting room and he asked me "what happened?". All I said was "I need another surgery." I bawled my eyes out in the car. This could be a never ending cycle of surgery. Thousands of dollars each time... I've made a plan to save up. Just wish it wasn't for this.
A Trip Down A-Cup Lane
So my surgery is 59 days away... and yes I do have a countdown timer on my phone lol. I feel surprisingly light-hearted compared to how I was feeling when I first found out that I had developed capsular contracture in my right breast. I think looking back at pictures of me before the surgery has really solidified in my mind why I initially chose to have a BA in the first place. I was so unhappy with the way I looked. I ALWAYS felt like a little girl. I can see how some women can pull of looking sexy with a small chest... I was just not one of them. I remember always comparing myself to other women and well, never measuring up... Ha (pun intended). In all seriousness, it's not good when you're constantly feeling like less of a woman. That's not to say that any of the guys I had dated cared. They didn't. But they knew I DID. And sometimes that caused a lot tension in relationships. I got jealous a lot and felt so insecure. Now that I have them, I think "wow... this is what I was missing out on." And what was that you may ask? It was feeling "normal." Like I'm whole. I know that may sound vain in a way, but really it's a huge burden to go around feeling deficient. Having my BA has given me the chance to experience what confidence feels like. And it feels good!
I don't think I'm better than anyone else, and of course I still have my days where I think "I love that size on her! Wish I would have gone as big as that!" But the truth is that I'm glad that I made it out okay after my surgery and I'm glad I got to get out of my insecure rut. When you get the opportunity to stop hating your small chest, it gives you the opportunity to start focusing on what you do love about yourself and the other things you want to improve (and I don't mean just surgicially lol). The girl in those pictures never thought she'd see the day when she'd actually properly fill out a bra. But I worked hard and saved up and did something for myself that made me happier to be me. You girls know what I'm talking about...
In the end, the people that loved me before surgery, still loved me after surgery. And no one that knew what I looked like before told me "Oh boy, glad you finally got those boobs." In fact, a few people even gave me that sad look and asked me why I wanted to change myself when I was already beautiful. And now I know... The whole world can call you "beautiful," but if you don't believe it, you'll never see it.
Hope you enjoyed my randomness... There's more to come. :)
27 Days Away
Today I finally scheduled my pre-op. Now it feels more real. I've been taking biotin for a few weeks now to help my skin and nails. So far it's doing a great job. My skin is super soft and my nails are stronger. This time around I'm gonna try and be healthier because the last time I had to stop working out so I could heal and it was just too easy to let myself go. I really don't want that to happen again. My scars are over a year old now and blend pretty well into my tan. They never bothered me too much anyways. I've been thinking about size and I really want 500cc but I highly doubt I'll be able to get that. Something about my small rib cage diameter. Sucks :( I read a post that was talking about push ups. Yeah I haven't been able to do one since before my first surgery. It just feels to weird! On that note for anyone wondering what it feels like to have cc. It feels like a tight knot in my chest. I definitely feel the squeeze around the implant. And when I lie flat on my back I can really notice the difference. So glad I'm getting this fixed. I'm gonna be super careful this time. And hopefully nothing goes wrong.
Bigger is Better?
My surgery is now 21 days away and my pre-op is scheduled for June 17th. I don't know if it's the capsular contracture or what but the gap between my chest is really bothering me. It could be that the cc is just amplifying the difference between my two breasts as one is tight and high, and the other is low and loose. When I look down at my chest I just keep thinking I know I can handle a bigger size! My boyfriend has made it pretty clear that he doesn't want me to get anything past 450cc's but I just know that I wont truly be happy unless I can get at least 500. Because even now as a 34D I still have to use a padded push up bra to get the look that I want. I just keep thinking of how much money I've already spent... This time I want to get exactly what I want. It's kinda weird that I like the shape of my cc breast as opposed to the one that is fine because it's higher up and more round lol. I'm really hoping that the doctor can work with me and get me the result I want.
Size Ain't Nothin But a Number!
Had my pre-op consultation yesterday. They drew my blood to check for pregnancy and blood diseases, and I paid for the surgery. Just as I was leaving I made sure that I left my doctor a note about the size I wanted. On my chart he wrote 450cc but I am requesting 475-500. 500cc would be my dream size but even the MA said "we have to make sure the breast pocket is big enough." I hope that already having the 400cc will make it easier to fit the larger implant. My surgery is now 11 days away! I can't wait to get this done... really hope I get the size I want.
2 Days Left to Go
I'm nervous and excited. The thought of finally having this corrected makes me really happy, but the reality of possibly having to face reconstructive surgery for the 3rd time after this next surgery has me stressed. I have noticed that randomly I get shooting pains in my right breast that the left never gets. And sometimes I feel the tightness kind of squeezing the implant at other random moments. I have looked at myself and thought "Ya know I could live with this for another year". But then I take a closer look and realize "damn I just want them to look and feel normal." Is it depressing at times? Heck yes. That's why I really NEED for this time to work out ok. Please just give me a few years without cc! On a side note... I got my pre-op instructions from the doctors office. More about that later. Let's just say so far Doctor J has given me the best treatment from his office so far. Well anyways, no more complaints. I have a week off to recover thankfully. I'm gonna spend my weekend trying to relax as much as possible because once Monday hits... everything changes.
Tomorrow is the big day! (for the second time)
I'm so anxious for tomorrow. I feel excited like I did the first time, only now a little less scared. I know what the pain feels like and I know that I'll be okay. I've got the house cleaned and I've got enough groceries, so I wont have to go anywhere all week. I have all the comfy clothes I'll need too. Now all I need are my new and improved set of girls. It's funny... the first time I got my surgery I could only remember getting to the doctor's office, filling out the paperwork, talking to the doctor, and meeting with the anesthesiologist. Then I walked into the surgery room, lied down and counted backwards. "1...2..." I was out before I could even get to 3. Then I remember waking up in the post op room. Someone handed me the card for my breast implants. "400cc's... I guess he couldn't fit 425cc's" I thought to myself. My boyfriend pulls up to the back of the office. I manage to stand up and make it to the front passenger seat help from my boyfriend and then BAM!! I cant remember a thing after that.
My surgery is scheduled for 1:00pm tomorrow. I wish I was getting it done in the morning time but oh well. At least I can sleep in and spend the morning anxiously waiting for it all to be over :)
Out of Surgery
My surgery was yesterday afternoon. And now I'm in bed recovering. Honestly I think the pain from my second surgery has been a lot worse. I was so nauseous in the car on the way back home that I got sick. Luckily my bf had a barf bag in his glove compartment. Too much info, I know... sorry lol. Right after surgery the pain in my right breast was very bad. I knew for sure the capsule was removed. And I'm happy to say I can totally feel the difference already. But here's the shocker! ...As anyone reading this can tell, I've always wanted bigger boobs even after my first surgery. In my mind the ideal size for me was 500cc's. To my surprise Dr.J agreed with me that a bigger size would be best! I was so happy. And just to check, the first thing I asked as I was waking up from the anesthesia was "how much did he put in?". The post operative nurse says "550cc's". Omg what? I was not expecting that. He said 500 first but I got 550. I was so shocked and happy that it fit. I trust his judgement. My skin and muscles had been stretched after my first surgery, which made it easier to get the bigger implant. Right now they are super swollen and painful. I cried when the nurse took off my bandages. Ugh... The pain killers help but not for too long. My back is so sore from being in bed. And my chest is tight due to this compression bandage. Gonna rest... will upload pics soon.
The first 2 days were rough to say the least. This morning at 6am I woke up in pain and took some meds. It's now noon and I'm feeling a lot less pain. Hopefully it continues to stay this way. I still need help getting out of a sitting or lying down position, but slowly it's getting easier. As you can see I'm wrapped up pretty tight by these compression bandages. The nurse said it's because I had a capsulectomy. I have to wear it 24/7. I'm super itchy. And oh boy do I feel bloated. And in regards to the size increase... The compression bandage makes me look and feel pretty small. I'm hoping as they drop and fluff I'll be more happy with the size. Nausea has decreased and so has my need for painkillers. But I still feel pretty fatigued, so after lunch I'm sure I'll take a nap. Bum life.
I can honestly say that recovery the second time has been way more difficult than the first surgery. I'm super itchy at my incision site and this compression bandage has been making life miserable especially during these hot summer nights. The good thing though is that the pain has finally eased up and I'm able to do more things for myself. I finally took a shower by myself and omg I felt so much better. While I was cleaning up I took a peek at my new boobs and they look full, round and symmetrical. The only bad thing is that my left breast feels numb in some areas including my nipple. Hope the feeling comes back! Other than that I'm tired of lying around the house. I'm always on the go but while I'm healing I'm stuck. Even when I think I can keep going my body is like "No... Go lie your butt back down and rest." Ha well happy 4th everyone... Enjoy the day for me while I'm here stuck in bed.
Finally Feeling Better
Today I am 6 days post op! Why the excitement? Because I was feeling pretty bad the first few days after surgery. I had so much discomfort I could hardly do anything. The compression bandage was making me miserable and having to only sleep on my back totally sucked because I'm a side sleeper. I guess now I've gotten somewhat uses to both so I'm not bothered as much. I also wrapped it less tightly around my chest so I could feel more comfortable. To my surprise my breasts feel pretty soft. That's probably because my muscle was already relaxed from my previous implants. But since these are bigger implants, I know they will have to relax a little more over time. In a way I feel flat! Lol. There's hardly any projection, which is normal just after surgery. I'm definitely looking forward to dropping and fluffing. In comparison with the 400cc's these definitely look bigger when naked but I know as time goes by the swelling will go away and they will shrink slightly. So I'm not allowing myself to get attached to my current size since I know it will change. Good news for me is I can now get up on my own, no help needed. But I still can't do any heavy lifting. Tomorrow is my 1 week PO appointment. I'm really hoping I can get the stitches removed and get the ok to stop using the compression bandage. Can't wait to get a good look at my boobs. My bf is constantly on me not to mess with them since he's worried about infection. And I know infection can cause capsular contracture. My biggest fear is that it comes back, so I'm extra cautious and doing my best not to mess with them too much. Hope everything goes well tomorrow.
Back to the Real World
My 1 week PO appointment went well. I got the green light to stop using the compression bandage which was a huge relief. The doctor looked at my breasts and confirmed that everything looks good so far. They trimmed my stitches and apparently they will dissolve over the next few days or so. Bad news is that my right breast is still numb in the same places. Still hoping that comes back. Can't massage them yet either. But I'll see if I can start when I go back in another 2 weeks for a check up... I'm finally back at work. Thank fully I have a desk job, but I still don't feel 100% yet. Still wish I could stay in bed.
Post BA Blues
I woke up today with my chest hurting. So far this second recovery has been significantly more difficult than the first. My left breast seems bigger than my right, as it sticks out on the side much more. I think that with my first set of implants, the left breast was displaced as it moved all the way to my left side whenever I lied down. The doctor mentioned "working a lot" on that breast, and I think that's what he was referring to. I think I still have the same issue now with the second set. I can definitely feel the difference with these bigger implants. My chest feels heavier and I know I'm probably hunching over more. Overall it feels the same as that time of the month when your breasts feel swollen and tender. I can't exercise yet so I think that's making me more depressed. Healing can't come quick enough. I'm starting to think it would have been nice to keep the 400cc's (without the capsular contracture).
Everything is Bigger in CA
I am now 10 days post op and my back is killing me! This larger breast size feels unnatural for me. I remember after my first surgery I went through a period of time where my back hurt constantly. Perhaps with a nice supportive bra and having some time to get used to my new additions, I was able to cope and eventually the back pain went away. I feel huge! I never thought I'd say this but I miss my 400cc's. They were just the right size, made me proportional and didn't cause me this much pain. I'm starting to think that I look top heavy now. If you're reading this and considering what size to go, do yourself a favor and pick something proportional. You don't need huge boobs to look better! Don't get caught up with all the talk you'll hear about 500cc's and up. In the world of plastic surgery BA sizes have increased dramatically and they are on their way up. Nobody mentions the higher risks for complications or the unnecessary back pain. As you can see by my posts I fell into the hype. Now I regret it. Please, you lovely ladies... choose wisely. BA surgery is not something you want to have to redo.
2 Weeks PO
I'm finally feeling somewhat better. More swelling has gone down which is good because my left breast was appearing much larger than my right. As of now they seem more symmetrical and the left is not sticking out as much on the side as it was last week. In regards to pain, I still have pain in my left breast which seems weird to me since I had the capsulectomy in my right. But on the bright side at least I'm feeling happier about the size. I must say that I do like the fullness that I have gotten with the 550cc's. And with some very estimated measuring I think it's pretty clear that I'm no longer a 34D. It's definitely bigger. What I'll end up with, I have no idea. I'm still wearing the surgical bra which is ok but it's getting hard to hide under clothes. Here's a pic so you can see how they're coming along...
Keep On Keeping On
Haven't posted in a while mainly because I still feel the same. My incisions are still healing and I still have lots of pain in my left breast. If I move the wrong way or walk or jiggle or sleep... it hurts. It feels like a charlie horse that you get in the middle of the night but in your pectoral muscle. It's between a deep burn and a sharp stabbing pain. In the morning it feels the worst. I've stopped taking pain relievers because if I took it every time I was in pain, I'd be taking them everyday. And I don't want to become dependent on them. I sit at my job which has been beneficial because I can limit my movement but as soon as I walk to my car for lunch, I'm in some serious pain. Speaking of which, I haven't been really able to enjoy my new boobs. My boyfriend hasn't either. He knows I'm in pain so he has only touched them twice. Haha... more like he's only patted them lightly twice. In regards to how they look, I think they look good and they are feeling pretty soft. I don't think I really went through the hard boob phase. Next weekend I get to see my doctor and can finally find out what he did to my left breast. I know he corrected something with my muscle. He had too... why else would I be in constant pain :(
Finally Some Good News!
Hey everyone... its July 26 and I am now 26 days post op. Had a follow up with my doctor today and I have lots of news to share! About 3 days ago I got up for work and began my daily routine of taking my morning shower. I was debating whether to take off my surgical bra or not because every single day it felt like my left breast was going to fall out from under my muscle. Yeah that kind of pain. Well I decided to suck it up and to my surprise I had NO pain once I took the bra off! Hallelujah! I was so happy. And luckily since then the pain has dramatically decreased. The only pain I get is when I sleep on my back at night which leads me to...
I found out why the sides of my breast were hurting so much. The doctor confirmed that both of my previous implants were displaced, which meant that when I lied down they both moved far over to my sides. (Something I mentioned in a previous post.) Well he said he did a lot of work on both breasts to make sure that my new bigger implants wouldn't have the same problem. It made me think "wow, my breasts were more f**ked up then I even realized." But hey there's good news...
I don't have to wear the surgical bra anymore. I got the okay to wear an under wire and start massaging. I can only massage them up and down. No side movements and no exercise for 2 months! Yeah that's not good news. But at this point I'm happy that the pain is finally subsiding. Apparently the pain I have when sleeping on my back is the pressure of the implants wanting to move to the sides (displacement). I have to wear snug and supportive sports bras while they continue to heal. I picked up 2 at Walmart. Hopefully they work.
Last thing I wanna say is I have absolutely no idea what my bra size is because nothing fits properly. I know I'm not a D cup... maybe DD. And small sports bras no longer fit. Im for sure a medium. If I could take a guess I'd say I'm probably now a 34DD.
Sorry for the long post. Just had so much to share with you all.
Getting Used to My New Girls
Hey Ladies... I wrote an update yesterday but of course everything got magically erased. So here goes nothing.
Went to Victoria's Secret the other day to get measured and was told that I was a 32D or maybe a 32DD because my sports bra might have been pushing them down. So 150cc's extra probably hasn't pushed me past a D cup. But that's ok because I'm really liking how they look. I dressed them up or tried to lol. Things don't seem to fit right. And I'm usually so used to trying to hide them at work and around my family that I don't ever really put them on display. That's ok for now since they're healing.
On that note, I'm doing my best to keep up with my massage schedule. I seriously wake up every morning checking them to see if I feel any signs of capsular contracture. It's my biggest fear! Well anyways so far so good at least.
400cc's 5'3 110 lbs
At my lowest weight... they didn't look huge and seemed pretty proportional. At least I like to think so lol.
Not Feeling Like Myself
I get this funny feeling in my right breast and it's so scary because it reminds me of how the capsular contracture felt. I'm seriously freaked out. And although they look fine they don't feel too great. I had very little breast tissue to begin with so I can easily feel the implants. Especially now that they are bigger. They don't feel as natural as the 400cc's did. This mixed with not being able to exercise has gotten me pretty depressed. I guess it's somewhat normal after a major surgery, but I honestly haven't really enjoyed the new boobs at all. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right decision getting implants. At first I was pretty excited and happy, but going through this corrective surgery has really dampened my spirit. And constantly being worried about cc has increased my anxiety like crazy. Well we all have bad days... guess this is mine.
Now hopefully I can find a way to cheer myself up with some new clothes. Here's to better days ahead.
What Size Did You Say?
Decided to go to Victoria's Secret once again today to see if I'd have any luck finally deciphering my size. So last time I was told 32DD but I tried those on and they didn't fit right. They were too small! I was shocked when Hope (the very helpful fitting room attendant) told me I should try a 34DDD. It fit pretty well except the band was just too big... it was crazy because I had been walking around the store saying to myself "no there's no way I'm bigger than a double d." Hope was also honest enough to tell me that i realistically won't fit any size they carry as I'm probably a 32E. Considering I started at a 34A, I'm honestly super shocked. Did anyone else ever underestimate their size after getting implants? Subconsciously thinking you're not as big as you actually are? I think that's what's happening lol. In a way i look down and still feel small, as weird as that seems. I really want a bra that fits and will help with my back pain. Think I'll have to probably order online...
Also, after BA how did you get back to a regular exercise routine? I'm full of questions today and any insights would help. I've added some more pics! Hope everyone is doing well :)
Looking for the Right Bra
I want so desperately to find a bra that will fit, but it seems nearly impossible. Guess I'm just frustrated right now... Went back to VS thinking "hey I'll just suck it up and by a pretty bra that doesn't quite fit because I'm so tired of sports bras." But after trying nearly 10 different VS bras on... I gave up. The only one I liked was the VS Very Sexy Push UP in 34DDD. But I just did not feel comfortable with that band size. It was just too big.
So I've been online shopping for hours now trying to figure out what my US size converts to for European and UK bras. (Even though I have no idea what size I truly am lol) And after much research, I decided to try a Le Mystere bra in 30F (because they have European sizing). I got 10% off for signing up for an email newsletter thingy, so my total purchase cost about $34 including shipping. Not bad I figured... and it looks similar to the VS bra I liked. It's gonna take about 7-10 days to get to me. Fingers crossed, this one works! It's hard to feel sexy in a sports bra! :p
Weight Weight Go Away
I'm now a little over 2 months post op and can finally say that the pain from my implants is completely gone. The only pain I have is neck and back pain. I haven't received my Le Mystere bra yet so I'm still stuck wearing sports bras. One thing I'd like to say that I've never mentioned before is... I don't like the way my breasts feel. They feel fake. More so than my smaller implants. I can feel the implants right through my skin. Luckily I don't have any ripples but I definitely feel them. And honestly it makes me feel self conscious when my bf touches them. I just keep thinking "oh he probably doesn't even like them. They feel so fake." He says they feel good but I think he's just sparing my feelings. At least they look good! Well especially since they look normal now. That's the one thing that cheers me up.
Now on to other sad news... jk. I'm dying to get back into the gym! Lower body exercises are okay but I hardly feel like I'm making a difference. Hopefully one more month and I get the green light to start working out normally again. Speaking of which... New boobs + extra weight = this sucks. With the bigger implants and heavier weight, they seem comparable to my 400cc's at my lower weight. Ugh wish these pounds would melt away and I could really enjoy these boobs. Ok enough complaints lol.