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39 Years Old, in UK, No Kids - United Kingdom, GB

Having loitered around this site for years, I...

Having loitered around this site for years, I finally decided to put my story on here after some posts and really lovely responses from ladies on the forum (thanks to all of you).

I am 39, live in the UK and don't have or plan to have any kids. Currently I weigh probably about 160lbs and wear a 32G-34H Uk bra size depending on brand.

My boobs seemed to appear overnight when I was 13 - from being more or less none existent to a D cup. They didn't stop growing for a few years and for most of that time I was wearing the wrong bra sizes which doesn’t help much.

Of course, being at school with big boobs is hideous, and school age boys find it endlessly fascinating, so I started trying to hide them quite soon. In fact, I recently realised to what extent I have been hiding them, even from my husband, maybe even from myself. I can't bear to see them ‘dressed’ without a bra, and always wear a bra until just before sleeping, then put one back on straight away as soon as I get up.

I am sure you are all familiar with the 'around the house' bras - you know, those stretched out not so supportive ones that are just there so that you have the minimal support but not feel to tightly strapped in? These bras don't look anywhere near presentable enough to leave the house in, and I have spent hours online looking for the perfect comfy house bra; i don't care what Bravissimo say, an ‘in-built bra’ in a top just doesn't do the job!

Anyway, in the last few years I started exercising, although running is difficult I am not one to let the boobies hold me back, so despite the pain and hassle I got into running and loved it. Long live the Enell bra - it is like fabulous tight armour!! (although the inside of that thing after a run is pretty gross, with the boobs all squooshed together inside with the sweat, haha!)

Anyway, the exercising has made me realise how big an effect these things have on my posture - my spine is curved at the top and I literally have a rounded shoulder look. I didn't realise it was the case, but when I mentioned to my husband I discovered he had already noticed that, but assumed that’s just the way I stand naturally. I hold this posture It is partly because the weight stops me standing straight but is mainly my way of hiding the breasts, and to be fair it does work, no-one believes my bra size when I tell them - they know they are big but don’t know quite how big! (don’t you hate that thing where you tell someone with 'normal' sized breasts your bra size, and they are shocked that they make bras in those sizes?!).

The second thing that exercising taught me is that when I started to take more notice of how my body feels, this feeling of neck pain, tight shoulders, bad, and endless pulled muscles is not normal. My PT mentioned to me that I should get a sports massage, and that was amazing! But I can't get rid of the feeling that this uncomfortable feeling should not be there. One fun thing we like to do round our house is that my husband stands behind me and holds my breasts in his hands (we joke that this could be his salaried job!) and while he holds the weight, I try to straighten my back and shoulders etc. It is AMAZING, the pain goes away, back still tight from years of strain, but I can stand straight and the relief is massive - anyone who hasn’t had the surgery yet, I recommend you should try it (just don’t ask a stranger!)

Also the headaches and migraines…. it is only recently I realised that it is possible that the migraines i started to get around age 15, and headaches that are now almost constant, could be related to the neck pain caused by holding up these boobies (I say possible, as I won’t know for sure until after the boobies have gone….)

So a while I plucked up the courage to go to my GP and ask if I could get an NHS funded reduction. Lovely doctor (very young and new) and to cut a long story short I went for tests, but only hit 2 out of 3 criteria or something so didn’t get funding. I know I could have carried on and appealed etc, but i gave up at this point and thought I would leave it there.

However, 3 years on the neck and back pain is worsening, and I feel so frustrated with the situation. I can see that the older I get the worse the pain is going to get, hand the harder exercise will be - I really do need to exercise if I want to carry on eating fabulous food! (I love food!).

Men staring, women staring, all the ladies on here all know the the score, and it makes you feel abnormal - you can ignore it, but for me, all that confidence goes again as soon as I see a photo of myself with one big boob across the front of my chest - the rest of me fades into the background really so I don’t blame people for staring to be honest, it is only natural (if very rude!!). Shirts? What are they? they are not for people like me! Bra shopping, so much fun, and tops long enough not to show my (not very toned ;)) tummy? Nope, these things do not exist!

Everyone here will be familiar with the above, and it’s a nightmare, but for me the main thing is to feel comfortable in my skin, I am not hoping for a model figure (well I am, but I am a bit more realistic than that!).

So, that’s the story until recently, when I booked my initial consolation with Mary O’Brien at Derby Royal. She was great, very much to the point, and answered all of my questions. She did all the measurements etc and says I am an ideal candidate for the surgery. I have to admit it was scary, to hear the details - pain I can cope with but I am a bit squeamish about the cuts etc. My husband was with me and the seriousness of it all really hit him that day.

After the consultation, it took probably one day for me to decide that I was still ready to go for it, knowing all of the risks and details. I have had to gently and gradually break this to the husband, as he is a real worrier and does not want me to be ‘cut up’ as he puts it. The having smaller boobs doesn’t worry him at all, and he completely gets the pain and discomfort issues, but that doesn’t stop him worrying. So another long story short(ish), he is now fully on board and of course he is going to be a big help in the weeks after surgery.


Excited? Just a bit!!!

(ps. I will add photos at some point, but will need to work up the courage first :))

Ok, gritting teeth, adding pictures!

I hated taking these, ugh! Have put little explanations by each as I think they need them, and hope they are useful.

To give a bit of background, my posture is awful, and I only just realised. Think it is a subconscious effort to hide the chest area, but it doesn't look good I can see that, and also it could go some way to explaining why I have so much neck pain and back pain.


Here are the other pics...

Alcohol, bras, obsessing about the surgery & my new chair!

hi everyone

Ok, so this is my first real update since the initial review to which I have to see I was so pleased to get so much support and empathy from ladies on here.

Taking the pictures and posting them was difficult, but it is only fair to post them as most people do and I have found it helpful to look at others. In fact, it will be great to see before and afters, as sometimes the mirror can lie somewhat...

I always knew my posture wasn't great, but this made it soooo clear. I am trying so hard to work those back muscles now, and keep my back straighter during the day in preparation for when i have the op in April, when is should be easier, but hopefully then my back will be prepared for how it has to straighten. To this end, I am doing a trial of this chair for work: http://www.hag-uk.co.uk/products/hag-capisco/ - I am at a desk at least 8 hours per day, so sitting slumped in my broken ikea affair was not the best idea! This one seems really good so far. Really different, and makes you kind of perch on there. The best thing is that it has arm rests at the back which makes you really open up the chest area and tight the back muscles. I am trialing a few so will keep updating as to which is the best for posture.

I can't stop thinking about the surgery at the moment. I lie in bed at night thinking about it. When my husband thinks I am watching a film with him my mind is wandering to such a time that my back and neck don't hurt so much, and I can wear a vest top! I am not sure how I am going to wait until April for it, although I have waited so many years already you would think a 3 more months would be nothing, but it draaaaags! I am making lists of what to take to hospital, what I need afterwards, and I already ordered a genie bra - when that comes I will assess if I need any more straight off or whether to wait. I am not sure whether to get something front fastening too, then whichever of those fits after surgery I can get more of online. I am hesitant to get anything else really because how will I know if it will fit? My PS told me just to use my usual sports bras after surgery... seems strange to me. My sports bras are the panache sports one, which the back is pretty tight on so that it stays in place - so I don't think this will be comfy for wearing round the house, and also it has been cups (even a bit big for me now!) so the new boobies would be swamped. The other one I have is the Enell - it doesn't have separated cups and also is extremely tight - whether that would be ok after surgery I don't know, as the tightness is also in the band... I think the PS must think I wear stretchy over the head tight bras (as if!).

I am still alcohol free after what is now 17 days. I started this to get my drinking under control - not that I think it is a real problem, but I just noticed I have been drinking more than I think I should over time. Also I am trying to get as fit as I can before the surgery. The daily exercise is going ok. Even if I can't be bothered to go and run, I am doing hula hooping for at least 20 mins per day. Food continues to be a vice however ;)

Something else I thought of that I always wondered but does sound a bit silly.. I will say it anyway... do any of you find that the only place you are truly comfortable is in the bath ?! Lately i have started to think perhaps the boobs are the reason for me always having loved having a bath and staying in for ages! The back and chest are supported in a way they are not anywhere else, even propped up in bed. Perhaps this points to swimming being a good option for exercise I have not considered. I am a rubbish swimmer, but maybe I could get better. Although then I would have to find a swimming costume to fit, grrr...

Have a lovely day ladies, and once again thanks for the support, you are all so lovely on here and I check my email all the time new posts!

Bored with waiting & thinking too much? (apologies in advance for the typos)

hi everyone

I have been reading so many interesting reviews that I became embarrassed at how infrequently I have updated! Just not too much to say now, its all in my head really, as I think about the surgery and the after surgery tbh, all the time.

I am so sick of waiting already, but am filling that time with planning....

So I bought a Genie bra, and in my current state it is little more than a small, stretchy, ineffective hammock for my boobs ;) It is a medium but i am hoping it will be ok after surgery. It is just right around the ribs anyway so thats good. Also going to get a Royce one I think too, just not sure which yet... Would love a Marena bra, but they are harder to get in the UK than in the US, and being as I might have to send it back if it isn't right... Won't worry too much I read about one of you (sorry I dont remember who it was now!) who bought 6 and none of them were right so perhaps no amount of planning can guarantee me to be fully prepared! Regardless, I still have an ever growing list of things I need to do and buy (I like to plan, like chickens!).

At the moment my husband and I are planning the months ahead socially, work and holidays, as we do, and it has to fit round the surgery, which has brought up the question of who to tell. I told a some people, one friend who knows how long I wanted it and though she is completely flat, she is really understanding in fact. Another couple of friends, one being my ex personal trainer, so she knows the physical effects and really understands. Someone else I told said something along the lines of 'oh well if it is for health reasons' in a way that made me think that really she didn't think it was, and was judging me as vain. That might be paranoia, as I really don't want to think of myself as vain, and although I don't judge those who feel they want to have more cosmetic surgeries (I don't consider BR cosmetic at all) I personally wouldn't be comfortable doing that as I prefer to try and work from the inside to accept what I am and what I have physically. Easy to say, harder to do of course! That said, having a nose you hate, or crows feet on your eyes (getting those!), I get it that those things can get to you emotionally, I really do, because a no small part of wanting the BR is due to the psychological effects.

However the point I want to make is that when those psychological issues that come from the physical are topped off with daily pain and discomfort that effects everything every part of your life, the suggestion that this is a vanity issue is really quite galling.

I am aware this could easily turn in a big old rant, so will stop there, but suffice to say I am not sure who else I want to tell which brings me to my next hurdle... do I tell my mother in law? My husband and I are both quite close to his parents, who live a couple of hours away. I am not close to my own parents, and the MIL and I have had a big battle to get to be the good friends we are now. She is difficult woman in a lot of ways but very caring and supportive when you need it. I was hoping to tell the in laws, and anyone else, only if they notice and dont put the change down to weight loss. Probably I will tell them afterwards in fact. My in laws are the type of people who are quite judgemental about looks, and a lot of comments in the past have been made about my weight and every time I see them they see 'oh you look good have you lost weight' even if I haven't! MIL has normal sized boobs, and I know 100% that she will NOT get this, I know it! She will support me after the initial shock, but in the meantime there will be a lot of 'oh why don't you just lose weight' and worry about me dying in surgery and I know that they will try to dissuade me from going ahead. There is no going back for me, this is a life changing operation that I am 110% for, that's not the problem.

However, my other half is scared, really scared, about the operation and the recovery and I have spent months getting him to be fully on board. His controlling parents may well hinder my hard work and scare him more. He is understanding about my neck and back pain, and frankly I think he will be happy he doesn't have to massage my neck every night any more! However, the fear he has threatens to override that…

We live in a rural area and i dont have good friends who are close enough to where we live to rely on heavily. If the truth be told I dont want to rely on anyone but my husband as he understands me so well and I am a bit embarrassed to have help from others. I really need his support, not just physically for day to day stuff after the op (and I am really really bad at not being able to do things for myself!), but also emotionally as I have a feeling this is going to be the hardest thing for me. On the one hand, I feel I should tell his parents so that he has some support himself, which is what he would like and at the moment I have vetoed telling them at all. I think maybe I am being selfish to expect to 100% lean on him whilst stopping him from having someone to support him. At the moment I am expecting him to help stump up the money, support me beforehand, wait on me afterwards and do it all with a smile ;) On the other hand, if he tells the in laws in fact I think that what he hopes will be supportive could actually be a hinderance, as they will panic and get flustered and tell him to try and stop me going ahead. That will just confuse him and then we both have to deal with that.

Also I considered telling them like the week or the day before, because OH’s main worry is that he wants someone to talk to about it when I am in hospital (PS says 1-4 days). What if they freak out the day before though? I actually feel like we are both 40 this year, so we should be able just to deal with this together.

Am I over thinking this? Maybe I should have booked it sooner so I wouldn’t have time to think so much about everything!

Well my hands are freezing up and the laptop is on 13% so i need to wrap this up now. It is unbelievable how writing for you girls here on real self is so easy. Each time I write it kind of clarifies how I really feel and it is so nice to be able to do that. Thank you all again for all of your support.

Finally, I would like to say a big ‘congratulations!!!!!’ and get recovered soon to all the girls who have had recent ops - I have been thinking about you all and have been reading your reviews fervently. The pictures are great and really inspiring. Some of the accounts are so funny that I lie in bedding giggling so much noone would guess I was looking at a breast reduction forum!



all that ranting and moaning made me forget the best thing that happened this week! I had a sports massage on upper back and neck and it was AMAZING! Really anyone with big boobs and neck pain, if you haven't done this already book one now! It is the best thing I have done for myself for ages. It hurts a bit but afterwards I felt like a new woman - the days afterwards have been great, more energy, better posture and i feel kind of freer physically. Be warned, it is very tiring for a while afterwards that day, and strangely my eyes and face went all puffy (attractive!) but it was more than worth it. I am going to go at least once a month now.

18 days to go....

Hello everyone

I have been consciously avoiding real self for a while because I was getting just so impatient for my surgery to happen and finding it difficult not to obsess - but I am back now and ready to organise myself!

Some really fantabulous results around - have just been checking out other updated reviews and it is really encouraging for those of us getting closer to our own dates I think.

I almost have everything I need and am now about to choose what to eat in hospital - doesn't look promising. Have spent the last couple of months trying to get as fit as possible for surgery, and have shaped up a bit due to a big change in diet - lots more protein (I was veggie for 25 years... long story) and much less crappy carbs - i.e. something similar to Paleo in a way - 'clean eating'. Feeling amazing on it in fact, I didn't realise how badly i was eating, because I eat organic as much as poss, and dont eat much junk food or processed stuff, I thought that was ok, but seems I wasn't getting nearly enough protein and way too much bread ;) Anyway that has been a fantastic help (kudos to my new PT) in making me feel better, more energy and more ready for surgery.

Also I have been going for much needed sports massages - oh my giddy aunt, that is amazing. Really really helps with back, neck, posture, as well as overall well being. I dont think you realise what toll a big chest takes on you generally, I suppose in trying to keep them held up, and simultaneously some of us also trying to hide them (as if it was possible!), doesn't do the back much good. My physio told me not to take it the wrong way, but my posture is creating a 'dowagers hump'!! Apparently there is no permanent damage, as I can still still completely straight, but in old age if I carry on like this I will have a hump. How very lovely! Am trying to stand straight now anyway, which does tend to thrust out the chesticles in an alarming way, so I try not to do it in public to much ;)

Also I decided not to tell people any more about the surgery - dont like the reactions I was getting - although I have found a few people who really want to have the surgery themselves are very interested and of course more understanding. Otherwise, I am just keeping it 'in house' and people can think what they want afterwards. If i decide to come clean about why I have smaller boobies, I will do so at the time, if not, who is going to ask that question???!!

And finally, here is my list of things to have ready for hospital and just after (dont even get me started on my 'to do' list:

Royce bra
Arnica oil for scars
Herbal laxative
Baggy nightdress & leggings for hospital
Dressing gown for hospital
Tissues & wet wipes
Phone & charger (playlists, podcasts & audiobooks)
Pillow for car

Thanks again all of you for your support, it is going to be very much more needed as I get closer to the 22nd, regardless of excitement, I am still quite nervous on top, so it is much appreciated when I hear from others in different stages of the process.

Oh and Maz, I forgot to say when I commented on your new photos - nice puppy (the dog I mean of course!) I have put a piccy of my fur baby as my profile pic - about to eat a yoghurt (yes he is a bit weird!)


Pre-op today!!

Ok so I am going for my pre-op in a few hours. Not really sure what this will consist of, but am going armed with a list of questions (as always!) and a picture of my Royce bra, which annoyingly has not turned up yet. Will also take a sports bra that personally I don't think it suitable (its one I use at the moment) but my PS did say I should use an old sports bra afterwards, so I am going to show her it just in case. It is very tight.

Also I am taking my list of supplements etc, to check they are ok to take:

Bromelain for swelling
Omega 6 & multivitamin I take all of the time
Multidophulis (am pretty sure these are ineffective with antibiotics, but will need them when ab stop to rebalance my stomach)
Arnica gel for later

Although I am very excited about the whole thing now, I am not really interested in this part, seems a bit boring, but necessary ;) Maybe we could go for a nice lunch afterwards... that would make it more fun!

Will update after preop :)

Post Pre Op!

Ok so the pre op was muuuch longer than I expected....

First I had a long chat with my PS, which was brilliant actually. She answered all of my questions as fully as I could have hoped for. Some of the questions probably were a bit silly, but I would rather ask than not (for example, does 'no fizzy drinks' before op include sparkling water!!) and she was happy to give proper explanations for all. I showed her my sports bra, which I didn't think was suitable for after the op, but she said it was perfect so what do I know! Also a pic of the Royce bra (which annoyingly has not yet arrived...) and also she said that was good. A couple of things I am really relieved about, firstly that the drains are definitely coming out before I leave hospital. Second, my stitches will be dissolvable, hurrah!!! I thought i was going back for stitches out later, so that is great.

Most of my supplements etc got the thumbs up (well, no thumbs down anyway - but I don't expect a doctor to actively encourage non prescription stuff hehe) - the only one that she wasn't keen on my taking was the Bromelain - because of the possible blood thinning. It could be that she is ok for me to take it later, thats a 'suck it and see' by the sounds of things.

Then I went to have blood taken - always a challenge with some digging around in my arms as the veins are deep or something, ECG, weighing and swabs galore.

The anaesthetist then came to have a chat with us, and I found out something else that I liked, that the drip wont be in for long at all, as soon as I can drink water freely (so I will drink like a fish as soon as I can manage it!). He was great, really put me and OH at ease and with that and PS being really good with all my questions, we both felt massively less worried about the whole thing. I do believe that my OH may have even been smiling at one point...which is a great improvement as he is more scared than I am about me going into surgery ;)

For some reason I am now worrying about something else instead.... What if I should have booked lipo under my arms as well? A lot of people seem to have that, but I am assuming that I can work it off with exercise and diet instead.... I hope so, I dont want to regret not doing both at the same time, although that was never my intention. But then, I guess there is always more you can do once you get your head round the surgery, maybe my eyes, muffins, arms..... But one thing I have always know for sure is that I need and want a breast reduction and lift, from being a young teenager.

Good luck to any of you about to go in, and good healing to anyone who is out the other side - i cannot wait to join you all over there!!!!


... with waiting!

I should be working really, but haven't been able to concentrate thinking about surgery date. I think I have everything ready now, and most things packed in my bag ready for Tuesday. The only thing missing is my Royce bra for after surgery which is coming in the post on Saturday allegedly ;) I have another sports bra any way that the ps says is fine, but I prefer to wear the royce one as it looks more comfy, and it will be put straight on me before I wake up.

I have got the dog walking sorted (want to leave husband free for visiting me/looking after business for a few days...) so that's great, as I want the dog to be kept entertained so that he doesn't notice I have disappeared (he is a bit spoilt!). Even have a few food things frozen ready for next week to ensure I don't get ready meals all week. That said, a miracle has happened and my OH has spontaneously started to make our tea this week which I like. He loves cleaning (weirdo), but doesn't usually do cooking, so not sure what is going on but I am not complaining of course :)

Work has gone haywire, after 5 deathly quiet weeks - sod's law that it will happen that way, but I will work over the easter weekend and then things will be all ready for when I can't work.

Have had some of thinking time since I am prepared, and am not worried about the armpit fat/sideboob or whatever it is. Its part of the rest of me that needs to be a bit slimmer, but not something I am not too bothered about. As long as feel the weight of these boobies lifted I am going to feel so much better I hope. Am also really really looking forward to running again, but this time with a bit more ease, and to get properly fit. Speaking of which, I will try to find time to take some new pictures as I lost a little weight and want to get a good before and after surgery for you guys (and for me to look at later!!).

All in all, I'm ready, so bring it on!!
Leicester Plastic Surgeon

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Hi Zipwig. Haven't been on this site properly in ages (probably because I keep loosing everythign I type!), so apologies for not commenting sooner. Your fur baby is gorgeous. Yoghurt is weird for dogs, they love it. You should try putting some into a Kong and freezing it. Keeps them amused for ages :o) Love your comment about the chesticle, sooo funny! Good luck for Tuesday. Bet you're really nervous and excited. Your body shape is going to change dramatically so don't worry about the pit fat. I never even thought about pit fat! In fact I've just turned to my other half and asked if he's noticed my pit fat (should have seen his face lol, hasn't got a clue what I'm going on about!). Again good luck for Tuesday. I will be thinking of you x x
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haha, yes, it makes us laugh every time we give him the (almost) empty yoghrt pot - he looks so thrilled with it and guards it possessively! For some reason he isn't interested in a kong whatever I put in it - he gets biscuits out super quick, and doesn't bother if it is more difficult. jNot so worried about the pit fat now (gross). My PT says that it is doable to get rid of it if I work hard! Can't wait, only a few days! How are you getting on now?
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Yes I'm getting on really well thank you. Got 3 new bras scarring is looking good. Just got an irritating dog ear but I'm sure I can get that sorted privately. You should try frozen yoghurt ice cubes. I also give them chicken stock ice lollies. You just boil up some chicken bones or a carcass add a chicken stock cube, pour into an old Chinese takeaway tub and freeze. It's lovely for them on a hot sunny dayday.
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Sorry, lost the whole bloody thing again! Arghhh! I've changed my profile picture as a tribute to my beloved Zeusy. Miss him so much. Thank you for your kind comment on my page x x
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ah yes, I saw a bit about that on your review. I asked my PS about dog ears and she said it wasn't a big deal to sort out afterwards... but also she said if you wait a while they sometimes look better over time. thanks for the chicken stock trick - I will try that, as he loves both ice cubs AND chicken of course!!! bit mess though, so maybe in the garden!
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oh he is lovely
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Yes definitely in the garden lol
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Thank you. He was by far the best dog I've ever had. Everyone he met fell in love with him.
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I'm not having the lipo either, and hopefully it will mean less pain post op. I think you are right, depending on body type overall weight loss and toning afterwards will take care of all that. You dont look to have much fat on you anyway. Tuesday, eh? You must be really excited! I am next Friday.
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ah bless u thanks ;) And yes, hopefully might mean a bit less recovery time - i think those areas are harder to tone but still... I am willing try! VERY excited, VERY!!
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I'm excited for both of u... Tic tic tic xx
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thanks sugar :)
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Good luck with your surgery. I would highly suggest calling your doctor and scheduling the lipo if you are at all interested. I wanted the best result possible, and I have read many ladies that did not have it done wish they did. It probably is big too late. If was money I had to pay out of pocket as insurance does not cover it, but definitely don't regret it.
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hi CL, i think it is too late, and actually I hadn't even thought about it earlier on so dont really want to make a decision this late on anyway. In all honesty it isn't such a big deal for me when I look properly - it is part of the layer of fat all over my body that I am trying to get rid of anyway (10 lbs off since my photos!). I am going to try really hard to get rid of it (my PT says it is possible if I put the work in), so there's my challenge! Thanks though for making sure I know , much appreciated. x
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So close now, exciting stuff, I'm 2 days post and feeling great apart from tiredness but that's to be expected. Bring a butterfly hair grip if you have 1, great for double wrapping drain tubing to attach to your pjs so they're not in your way while peeing :)
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yes, sooo close to my 'slice and dice' as you put it on your page! (love that!). Thanks for the advice, dont have a butterfly clip as my hair is very short, but I will bear it in mind and find something else.. not looking forward to having drains, but will grit my teeth. EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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"For some reason I am now worrying about something else instead.... What if I should have booked lipo under my arms as well? A lot of people seem to have that, but I am assuming that I can work it off with exercise and diet instead.... I hope so, " FROM YOUR POSTING ABOVE - this will PROBABLY NEVER GO AWAY WITH EXERCISE ! Most people either get the LIPO or have the Under Arm Fat and ACCESS BOOBAGE - CUT OUT .
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So excited for you. It is getting so close ;)
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