Mum of 2 Reinventing Herself - Denver, CO

Have been lurking for about a year and have gone...

Have been lurking for about a year and have gone from looking at lower body lift to "no I will bust my butt with weights" to "hmmm..... maybe a little help is ok". I have lost about 100 pounds over 3 years and I am nearing the end of the weight loss portion of my journey. I have 31 pounds to go and whilst I think I am rocking it up top (expect for new girls), from the belly button below, I need help. It seems not matter how clean I eat or how much I workout I can't get rid of the flap under my belly button or the get the cellulite and skin in legs to do anything but hang. I am now at the point of thinking that a MM might be a viable option and it is ok. I have had to come to terms with doing it is not cheating and I sort of deserve it. I have worked my butt off trying to change my lifestyle and my health but feeling like I still have a huge mountain to climb because of these areas I loathe. I have just started researching and decided that next month is the month that I start doing consults. I am going to start so I can see if the work as much as I think or will I be pleasantly surprised that really it is small potatoes. I also have started savings as the thought of financing scares me and I would much rather now that once I am done, the money is too, but we will see ;-)

So I am hoping that from what I have been reading that recovery will be so much easier now that I am so healthy. I exercise 6 days a week and eat probably 95-97% clean and even my junk food is sort of clean as we are foodies and would much rather spend money on good quality ingredients than junk.

I am so looking forward to completing this journey and being the whole new me that I have worked so hard for.

So is this really the only way?

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I have sort of ran the gamete in thoughts on surgery. I have followed blogs of both surgical and non surgical people and while I thought I could so do it without surgery, I don't have hours and hours a day to spend in the gym with a trainer and I am a good 10 years older so I am sure that my time doing it would be worse.

I knew I would always have the "girls" done but it was only whilst we were looking for wish pics for that, that I have decided a mommy makeover. I am now a million percent sure I want it done however now husband is like "maybe we should see what can be done with exercise?" What? I know that I have another 30 pounds to go and I know that will be a huge difference but I think that areas like my thighs and tummy will always need some major help. I kept telling him that I can lose in specific areas. Yes I can tone but I would probably have fat and skin over the toned muscles. I told him we got to a trainer of course they are going to say they can do it, just like a surgeon would say the same. I don't know an independent party that would give you a good opinion.

I just want to start saving and know that that chapter is upcoming with a date. I am sort of over this old flabby body. It reminds me of the bad choices I made and how bloody hard it was to correct it at this age.

Starting to Save

So we have started the "surgery fund". I am really wanting to save at least 75% of it so I I don't have the moneitary worries of paying it off over my head. I feel like I have been on this journey so long I sort want to mentally close the book.

Also being the anal retentive list junkie I am I have done my list of questions for the PS at consults and also started making a list of supplies with figures so I can also save for them.

While I am saving for the higher end of figures that I have seen in the Denver market, I am trying to stay motivated and know that once I am at goal I can start consults and schedule this thing. It is hard to stay focused now and not just say "screw it just do one thing at a time and start now" but I know that even though it is only 30 pounds, if I could loose more in the tummy/bum/saddle bags, it only helps me have to pay for less to be done.

Figured out how to add pics.

Love these profiles. Not sure what the actually volumes are but definitely the look I hope I can achieve

Starting to compile wish pics

So I will start off by saying I feel weird being so critical of waists, tummies and boobs. I now analyze every lady I see. I definitely want bigger boobs, much to my husband's joy;-). I want curves and a small waist. I have the small waist (when I push my manga pouch in ) and I can image the curves with my rice boobs so I don't think it is impossible. I never in a million years would have thought I wanted implants but I guess always being overweight, I never saw myself as a sexy or sexual being. But now I can not wait till I can be naked and be like "KAPOW!!!!".

So with all that being said let the wish pics commence.

Wow I really looked like that?

So as I was trying to find pics to post here, we found some of when I was at my heaviest. And all I can say is I don't even know who that person is? I honestly had no idea I looked like I did. I knew I was overweight but I guess in my mind, I have a vision and whilst it was overweight, I didn't even see my own obesity. It is crazy and foreign and was a huge smack in face to pull my head out and realize I have made such drastic, positive changes and I have worked my ass off (too bad not actually ;-) ) to get to where I am now. It really has motivated me to not only reach goal, not because I am bothered by the number so much but because I have tried my whole life to lose weight and have tried every diet under the sun and none worked and I always gained what I lost and more, but now I got this. I will get there and it will be awesome because I actually finished the one thing in life I have never been able to do and I am far far healthy than even I could have ever imagined.

So with all this new empowerment, I have decided on the 3 docs I want to consult. The first is because she is who not only my PCP, by my OB/GYN and my hub's doctor referred me to and that is Tanya Atagi. I like her work and love that she does it in a hospital that is close so when it comes time to have the surgery, it is close and easy for my mom and hubs. I know that hubs likes that it is a hospital as opposed to a dr's surgery. I have read up on both a center and hospital and it is split as to for and against. Most seem to like that they can manage the staff and also the costs and equipment, where as others like that it is in a hospital setting. Any hoo she will do them at the hospital and a surgery center so I will ask if there is a price difference as they are within 1 mile walking, of one another and to be honest, I am not bothered by an accredited center. The only negative is her BA results online seem so blah. I mean they look well done but I want some boobs that I actually feel are worth the $5k I have to pay if that makes sense. So I don't know if that is just not what she does or what. Also when I first started back on the PS thought about 6 months ago I emailed them and they emailed back immediately but when I said I was like a 12-18 months out, like I never heard back. That has left a bit of a bad taste in my mouth, like clearly the money of the op is spent on keeping you happy once you have chosen them but nada if you are just window shopping.

The second one is either Dr. Vath or Dr Wolfe at the Center for Cosmetic Surgery. So here I am sort of torn, they both have tons of awesome reviews and I have read through like all their reviews rather it was a procedure I would have or not just to see what the deal was. They both sound incredible but would it be weird to do a consult with both? HMMMM..... not sure what to do. But I really like what I have read and their pics are amazeballs. I also like that they are drainless TT and how they have explained it on different sites. When you read up on it, those PS who are all about drains are like "oh it takes so much longer to do the progressive stitching or whatever the term is but these guys are like yeah it does add a small amount of time to the surgery but the patients comfort and positive healing is far more important and far outweighs that small amount of time. Just liked they way they approached that one.

So now I just move along and save the $ and everyday gets closer to that goal and starting those consults and eventually closer to a surgery.

Progress is good ;-)

You have got to be freaking kidding me

So in an attempt to line up all my little ducks, I went to my PCP yesterday for a check up and to get orders for labels. Well she said that with my past pneumonia and comprised lungs from being not only overweight but a former smoker, I should get an updated pneumonia booster and since I was there and healthy, jump on my flu jab. Now I have had flu jabs for ages and ages and aside from a sore arm for a few hours but last night I could barely raise my arm to get undressed. I was in tears and it was all I could do to take the ibuprofen. It felt A bit better this morning but now I am running a 102* fever and and so sore and am counting the minutes till kids go to bed so I can have a bath and a Beechams hot berry fruit and pass out. Seriously I am not a wuss and have a high pain tolerance but I feel like i have been hit by a truck. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day

Keep On Keeping on

Feels like ages since I have updated. To be honest, things have been so crazy with kiddos in school and all the things that brings. Have been plugging along on the weight loss and just trying to stay healthy as it seems I have caught the latest bug that was brought home.

I have been trying to keep up on everyone's progress but have honestly little to report on my own. I did pics but have been too sick to put up so that is my goal this weekend. I did have a few "holy crap" moments whilst taking them and feel like I really am unsure about what work may or may not need to be done. Definitely the girls are saggy and pathetic, so they are on the list and definitely tummy but legs are now a concern as they are going the way of the tummy of being nice and strong underneath a layer of fat ;-( Whilst they are shrinking, they look horrible with all the skin and cellulite. So much so that it is hard to focus on much else.

At any rate, I have loved all the tips and videos and I add to my list daily. I am also fairly certain i will go with Wolfe or Vath with the reviews I have read and results. I will consult with both just to see who is best fit and also the PS that was recommended by my doctor.

Pictures Finally

So here are my pics. Still feel like I have have such a long way to go before I even get to consults. It is really important for me to reach that goal first, mainly just because I want to get there and say I truly did it.

Another Wish Pic for implants

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