I have gone into a very deep depression as a...
I have gone into a very deep depression as a result of my rhinoplasty surgeries. I have chosen to write this review as I hope some of you have some experience which might help my situation, so here goes:
I have had a bump shaven down a year ago in local anesthesia, it took about 10 minutes, and I healed within a week - no swelling, no nothing because it was such a minor thing.
Unfortunately I developed a cartilage graft in the middle of my bridge and a bump in the same spot as before.
A year later I was sure it couldn't be worse, so I booked an appointment with a new doctor to fix my nose. This was a bigger procedure as he wanted to thin my nose-bridge and take a little of my tip.
The surgery went fine and so far it has been two weeks since surgery, and one week exactly since I had my cast removed. I am very scared as I have been told the nose looks 80 pct of what the final result will look like at this point, and I am horrified.
When the cast was removed I LOVED my nose, I even spoke to my boyfriend about writing my surgeon a "thank you for saving my self-esteem" card and buying him some fine wine.
But the day the cast was removed I awoke to a very crooked and blue nose. The skin on the right side of the nasal bridge had "sunken" in - which scare me as I haven't heard of this issue ANYWHERE. It makes my nose look beyond crooked and it has turned purple-ish at the spot.
I am horrified as I have heard the swelling only goes down further from now on, and now after a week has passed nothing has really changed. I have called the hospital and I am seeing my surgeon tomorrow, but I don't see how this can be fixed. I know about restylane and such, but I don't want to inject my face every 6 months for the rest of my life!
I look at it all day long and think the bone has actually been rasped down more in one side than the other (just a little) and this has left this huge hollow, sunken in side. So I am not sure injecting something would even fix the problem.
It is not possible just to rasp the other side to make them look the same, as the bridge of my nose already have been made super thin. I do like my new nose from the side, but from the front it just looks awful and I don't think I can go though another failure, but at the same time I cannot live like this.
I have isolated myself completely, and I only talk to my boyfriend. I get anxiety attacks whenever I go outside and feel like I am going to faint or throw up. I have considered going away to a place where no one knows me, because confronting people is like a stab in the chest. I am ashamed because I caused this myself - people only seem to feel compassion when someone have surgery because they have to - I feel they laugh at my vanity, that it is my own fault.
I am living in a nightmare and I cannot wake up, ever. I keep taking pictures of myself in hope it has magically changed in five minutes but it just makes me depressed, so depressed I have had thought about killing myself.
I am afraid I won't ever feel beautiful again..
Please if someone know something which can be done, let me know.
Today I met up with my doctor and told him about...
Today I met up with my doctor and told him about my worries. He told me the sunken side was there because my nose had tilted slightly to the left and thus left a gab in the opposite side.
Because it has only been two weeks since my operation he told me my nosebone hadn't healed yet, and suggested we did some local anesthesia and pushed the bone back in place. I am still in shock, the anesthesia hurt so bad because my nose hadn't fully healed yet and I felt the push all through my body - I have had my wisdom teeth removed and the pain was no where near this.
Well I took a cab home, and have slept for a few hours. I cannot see any difference in the sunken side, and I think it made the good side worse. But I will give it some time and evaluate. He told me he did want to do surgery on me again but each time there was a risk of skin not acting the way it was intended. :(
So now I don't know what to do now. Should I find a new surgeon? It is hard when I like and trust this guy, even though my nose haven't turned out the way I wanted it, I DO feel like he did his best, and that he want me to be happy. - and of cause because he does it for free. But I am not sure he is capable of fixing my problem.
Another dilemma is my location, Denmark has a pretty secure healthcare system and if something awful happens I am entitled to free help - Whereas if I find a doctor in another country I won't be covered and will be on my own. Still, Denmark have a really limited amount of capable doctors. Because of Denmark's small size they often aren't as experienced as rhinoplasty surgeons from other countries.
I think it is weird how I acts around my surgeon. I have spend all last week since my cast came off crying my eyes out - and I planned to break down in front of my surgeon today, to let him know how devastated I am about the result, but I just couldn't. I don't know if he actually know how sad it makes me, I tried telling him but it seemed like he just thought I acted a little silly. He kept telling me to relax and said we would look at things when we met again in 2 weeks.
So, nowhere near happy and mentally going crazy - another horrible experience richer, and now I need even more time to heal... and I don't see the problem going away!! I don't feel like I have gained anything today other than grief.
My nose have gotten a lot better after my surgeon...
My nose have gotten a lot better after my surgeon pushed the bone back in place, it is now a lot more symmetrical. However there is still some hollowness in the sides of my nose, which is very annoying.
My surgeon told me we can use some fillers if I cannot stand it, but I already feel much better just from the symmetry (even though it's not a 100pct symmetric), I also cut some bangs in my hair which are good at camouflaging the slight un-symmetric side of my nose. (a tip to all you girls)
I will post a full frontal picture later today (Don't know how I will feel about removing my anonymety, so maybe I will remove it again sometime).
If the hollowness and slight symmetric flaw go away (or almost) I am sure I can be happy with my new nose - even though I have to get used to it being so thin.
Its been a little over two months since my...
Its been a little over two months since my operation, and I feel a lot better - I am still not fully satisfied about my nose but I can live with it.
My nose is still somewhat hollow on the sides but it looks more symmetrical now (still not a 100 pct though).
Now a new thing worry me. My bridge has lessened in swelling, but my tip hasn't. Maybe I am imagining things but it looks so huge now, compared to my super slim bridge.
My doctor told me he could make my tip a little smaller, but I asked him to wait since I suspect it might go down further (I read on the internet that it take some noses a whole year to go down) so I am being patient! It still feels weird when I touch it and I think that is because it isn't "finished" yet.
I also wait, because I know my body can't handle another round this soon! the previous experience seriously gave me ulcers and made me suicidal.
Well, it not all bad - and I thought I would share the good stuff too!
1.) The reflection on my nose from the front have gone from crooked to a straight line!! That at least pleases me!
2.) My bump is gone!
3.) No one have noticed the hollowness (or maybe they just choose not to mention it) I choose to believe the ladder!
Hopefully even more will come in the future!
UPDATE TIME!! XD
Its been a long time since...
UPDATE TIME!! XD
Its been a long time since operation day, 7 months to be exact!!
My nose is still a little crooked from the front, and the tip bulbous - but it has improved a lot since it was pushed by my doc. It is not as great looking as the after picture (which is a combo of good lighting and blur)
Anyway lets start with the good: It looks a lot better from the sides and from a 45 degree angle - No humps or bumps anywhere! When the sun hits my nose the reflection on top is also still a straight line!! (see front after pic)
That being said, somedays are better than others. My tip swells up easily for some reason - which look quite ugly on the slim top and excentuates the crooked side - and I have to push the bone back into place often (I do it almost every day) I don't know if it makes a difference anymore, but I think it does (in my brain anyway! lol).
The hollow side that makes my nose look crooked from the front is what I am most displeased about still - However I think it can be corrected by balancing out my tip and maybe a little filler... but I also still have other issues that irritate me.
The bulbous tip which doesn't match my slim bridge! - and I still think my nose goes out too far from the side (being pointy), that he didn't remove enough at the tip.
But my nose it SOO much better than when the first surgeon f****d up my original nose - (my nose now is also better than my original nose).
It frightens me that so many plastic surgeons do bone-surgery, as most of them clearly aren't qualified. The doc I have now is a nose bone specialist (not a plastic surgeon) and I recently found out most plastic surgeons don't have as much knowledge about nose bone structure and healing - and that's why new humps kept appearing when he did my nose.
Many plastic surgeons specialize in one area but many also do everything (boobs, lips, nose, jaws etc.) and thus aren't experienced and/or specialized in just one area!
My new doc explained from the beginning why I wouldn't get new humps/bumps with him operating - and I haven't !
I owe this man so much - My ex surgeon who almost ruined my nose work at the same hospital and back when he screwed up my nose, I was crying my eyes out, but he told me nothing could be done. I kept arguing with him and at last he said we could go down to the nose specialist (my current doc) and see what he has to say.
To my surprise (and my shitty ex surgeons) he was on my side, and agreed that is wasn't a good result. So he offered to correct it for me for free! He has been kind all along and definently improved my result - but I still wonder what I would have looked like, had I chosen another doc with more experience to begin with.
Anyway I stay optimistic and take it day by day - I will meet my doc soon and discuss my concerns, and probably wait until a full year has passed until I do anything.