Mommy Makeover! Sagging mess of stretch marks and scars - Dallas, TX

Well, my Last post was a Debbie downer but I was feeling very low. Today I woke up,worked out and am walking around with a smile. I took my kids to a waterpark this weekend and felt Terri Lu uncomfortable in my swimsuit as usual. A teenage boy elbowed me in the gut and turned to his friends and giggled. Made me upset and happy all at the same time cuz next year my gut will be gone and he will still be a teenage boy. Lol! Going to tell my kids this week. That has be more scared than anything. I don't want to scare my girls or cause them worry. But I want them to know and know that mommy loves them more than anything. Image purchased everything I've been told to, prepped my home, and Thursday is my last day at work for over 2 weeks. Let's do this. Nim ready to get that flat tummy I've dreamt of.

Today I kinda lost it a little bit. I slowly have things arriving to me from drugstore.com and today my 6 year old saw the box of supplies I thought I had hidden. I haven't told them yet as I don't want to worry them. She asked me point blank what was going on and I just froze. How damn hard is it to tell your kids that your going to have tummy surgery? When they are staring at you with wide eyed innocence, pretty hard. I told her I was stocking up and felt so terrible as I dont lie to my kids. she seemed satisfied with that but then I started thinking of everything that I am going to miss over the next few months. It's summer and I can't take them swimming or to the beach. I can't pick them up and twirl around or play just dance. At least for awhile. I feel like I'm being so selfish for doing this. I have wanted it for so long and saved and saved and now that it's here I'm feeling totally guilty and ashamed. I have been excited and positive up until this point but today I feel so low and upset. My husband told me last night that he hates that I'm taking this risk over a few stretch marks. I feel completely unsupported and alone. I have not told any of my friends because I don't want to be judged. Just a valley I suppose. Tomorrow I will probably be raving about how I only have a week to go. Or maybe this is all PMS as yes, you guessed it, aunt flo decided this would be the best time to make an appearance. Really?...

I have all of my supplies finally purchased and all of my comfy clothes ready to go. It's becoming very real now that in a little over a week I'm going to be looking down at a different body. Wahoo!!!!!!