Muscles reconstructed, feels awesome.

Hi,
first I want to say that my english might be not perfect, but I will do my best.
I got my implants in, May 2010.
425ml Silicon under the muscle.
I used to be a 32C, now I am a 34E, some bras 34F.

I am not sure why I choose to get them in, probably to make me feel better, I went through a difficult time.
I never did feel better, just big and fat, and heavy.
Just weeks after the implant I started not liking them, I was allways trying to hide them. It was hard to join the fitness classes, I was used to join, so I gained weight.

All I want is to get them out of me, this feeling of having them moving inside me is aweful. I am at a point where I can say, I am hating them. I want them out.

I am very scared what I am going to have left, but I know for sure, i don't want to live with what I am now.
I know now, that I just want to be me, and like myself as I am.

I had my pre-op on the 6th this month, and the removal is planned for the 22nd of November.
I have chosen to do it with just local anaesthesia, does anyone have had it done like that?

So today I talked to the nurse, she had a few questions and did let me know a few things....and it made me even more nervous.
We talked about having it dome with just local anaesthetic, and insured me that it will be Ok, even if I am awake. So thats good.

Its now 9 days before surgery, and I get more and more anxiety. I wake up at night asking myself what people will think and say. Not that it should matter, because its my body, but I still do think about that.

Especially what my husband will say. He was against them in first place, but probably more because of the huge amount of money that it cost...well i am not sure he ever liked them, but I don't know. Asking him now, he just sais that it is my body, thats all on answer I get, which makes me feel lost.
And that is why it is so good to stay connected with you all, and so helpful. I don't think I would have had the courage to remove them, if I wouldn't have found all of you...thank you for every one of you, you all are so strong and brave!
When I found this side, I started crying, went down to my daughter (20 years old) and said: I am getting them out!!! I was never so happy and sure about anything in my life, I said I am not the only one, I thought I am the only.

And here I am just a little over a week away form it, and each of you, have helped me! Thank you!

Its now only 3 days away, and my emotions are up and all over the place.
This morning my husband said to me, soon there going to be small again...and I had so much joy in my heart visualizing me like that, so much that I smiled full of joy.
I don't think he meant it as an compliment, because he also said that they will be stretched out, but I couldn't care less at this moment, all I want is this pressure and movement of this bags out of me.

I don't know how its going to turn out, because I let my PS remove some of the fat in my left breast ( how stupid of me) the left breast was bigger, so he said well I will remove a little of the fat there, and I thought its OK, I wish I wouldn't have, he remover 60cc, thats I think a lot, and I am very scared that its going to show, but I still want to be brave and go for it, because it is what I wish for myself out of the deepest of my heart :)