: Here is My Breast Journey

Omg! Wanna talk anxiety? Yep, that's me. Yesterday, I went to my PS's office to pay for my new ladies. However, I'm torn as to what size I should get. One part of me just wants a good handful, and the other part of me doesn't even know for sure how much that would take to get to. Since I am 6"1 my anatomy, obviously, is different. And only having feedback from one wonderful woman who stands 5"11 isn't enough. I wonder, why tall women don't get boob jobs? Are most already born with them? Or do most like their natural breast, no matter what the size? I know being tall as I am is not natural (or common) but seriously, the 1000.s of breasts ive looked at, maybe 15-20 have been close to 6 feet but NONE my size.
Last night I did the "rice check." lol. (yes, I'm obsessed) thought: if I'm THIS obsessed about getting them, does it mean maybe I should go with the bigger size ? I was originally thinking 400cc's but then I've started to second guess and contemplate 350-375cc's. I am going behind the muscle but I do not know how much of a difference this will account for.

Surgery is next Tuesday. I know it'll be here before I can realize it. I've read sooooo many stories about women in pain. Well, I'm a chronic patient with 2 different chronic problems and one of them is pain. I'm concerned because I know my doctor gives out oxy's but I already take oxy daily (5x-for over a year). And let's say I get a toothache, these oxy's do not affect that kind of pain for me or my period. So, I wonder what options he has. I've lived with ailments for quite some time, and te last thing I want is to purposely put myself in more pain. My doctor does participate in rapid recovery, and he swears by it. I asked about the pain pump and he says he does not do it, though others he practices with have that option. He claims "you won't need it!" gosh, wouldn't that be a miracle in itself if I did not? I'll have to post regarding that aspect once that time arrives......

6 more days....

This time next week, I'll have my new ladies riding with me. Oh, life is grand!

Just 4 days to go. Yes, my surgeon is very experienced. I have on my notes app of my iPhone a list of questions/concerns to go over with him before I go under. I'll be so relieved once this is over. Finding real self eases my mind, especially when real people post back to me personally. For one, I've noticed I talk less about it with my hubby bc I don't want to get on his nerves about it or with anyone else. Second, I get honey opinions and great information and advice from others who hsve been in my shoes. Lastly, since I've only told about 5 people (and finally my 17 year old today- which she rocks and supports me) I feel like we have our own secret society here. Although, we don't know one another we KNOW one another because in some way we are all looking for something within ourselves that others just don't understand or they're too passive, shy, or embarrassed to admit to themselves how they feel so they simply read our comments but don't do anything for themselves.
Honesty, I'm outgoing, outspoken, and relentless. When I want something I get it. I'm a 110% person in anything i do in life. Hopefully, if anything, someone can read this and take the message with them and speak up if they don't like something and not live in fear. I hsve chosen not to tell many people about this bc really what's to tell? It is a big deal for me but for others probably not so much.
I suppose I'll shut up now.
Real self--thanks for allowing us going through what we are to be able to come here and share our stories and hold each others hand via electronic device. If what you're doing wasnt helping or working we wouldn't be here or keep coming back.