What a place to start...here with you. My journey...
What a place to start...here with you. My journey I'm sure is very similar to yours which is why we have found this village for us to share our secrets, pain, and quest to reshape ourselves inside and out.
I was 300 pounds, now 165. It has been 10 years now at the new weight. I've had two children with the same man I met at 300 pounds and now its time to show on the outside how I feel inside.
I am finding it difficult to spend the money on myself...I feel like I am taking it away from my children. I do however, feel that I should have the chance to spend the remaining years of my life more happy about myself than I am now. The problem for me is I guess I feel that I am responsible for the way I look. I overate for years. Binged. I could not stop eating. I'm not sure why I found happiness in food, well at least for the second I ate it...odd isn't it. How the second we finish the binge, the guilt and ugliness we feel and self hatred is so strong. Ye, I did it to myself. I hope to understand why I did this to myself, why I hurt myself for years, and perhaps I can find some answers as I am forced to assess my naked self to men (dr.s) on this journey.
hugs and hope you are feeling happy today...k
Well after long discussions with myself and hubby...
Well after long discussions with myself and hubby about not being happy in my own skin, he has agreed to let me pull money out from our retirement and proceeded. This decision was reached last night. Since then, I spent early morning hours plagued with guilt. I don't spend a lot of money. Truth is we don't make a whole lot of of money. I'm a college lecture and my husband works for the federal government. " why do I need at 37 new boobs" I kept mulling over. Perhaps it is a waste of money. I drive a second- hand prius!!!
Even with doubts and fears I still want to proceed. My thighs are pretty bad and so are my boobs. I'll have to get some better pictures for you all as the ones I've posted as not that bad. My legs look, in my opinion, not that bad int he photos I loaded here.
The truth is I do not feel confident or sexy. How could I? My boobs are on my belly bottom and when I lie in a missionary position to have sex, my skin from my things fall over my girl bits! So not sexy!!!
Still scared though and worried about money.
Well I'm torn. I have found, what I believe to be...
Well I'm torn. I have found, what I believe to be a superb doctor...Dr. Agha. His staff are extremely professional and helpful. His reputation is amazing. But I'm in a pickle! His prices, while it makes sense based on his expertise, are more than other dr.'s Ive met with. My husband is looking for "more bang for your buck", but Dr. Agha is the one who I want. We are a prius household but I don't want the equivalent of this for plastic surgery!
I might just have to have one of the surgeries performed and wait a year until I plan to have a lower-body lift then get my boobs done then too. I really wanted to have both the breasts and thing reduction performed this year...but unless I use one of the other doctors...its not going to happen. Not sure what to do. To go with the best and get less or get it all done with a less reputable doctor.